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+---- Thread: Hot Springs contemplation (/showthread.php?tid=20381)
RE: contemplation - Oksana - Feb 23, 2022
As they spoke about the hot springs Oksana considered bring Aleister there. She was sure that he'd been there before, how could have not been having been born on the mountain. Still it was a quiet place place them to spend some time together. Maybe talk, maybe not, Mayne just enjoy each other's company and forget that they had responsibilities for an afternoon.
Jethro admitted that he sometimes spent time just being in the moment. "Does it help?" She asked since she couldn't ever remember doing that. Just being in the moment and not worrying about the hunting that needed to be done later or the conversation she needed to have with someone. Her mind was always going, thinking of this or that thing that needed to be done. Sometimes she did wish that she'd could just stop but then she'd never been that way. Even as a pup because so much had happened in her puppyhood there hadn't ever been a moment where she wasn't thinking.
Oksana frowned when he explained that he came from a place that was bad. That he wasn't used to hearing the appreciation from another. "I suppose not everyone feels the way I do. That when a job it done well or help is given when there is a choice not to that the wolf should be told that they've done a good job or be thanked for their help." She smiled sadly, "I didn't come from a bad place but I honestly can't remember if appreciation was shown to me." She knew she'd been cared for but she also knew that her mother had left her with Driftwood. Left her in the paws of others who already had so much to deal with. "Your in a better place now," she stated her smile growing more cheerful, "And I for one am glad you are."
However she was frowning against ad he expressed that it was better for it to be him the one that got hurt. She nodded when he spoke of her having a mate and then he spoke of others having someone. When he talked about himself it was in a way that told her he didn't feel anyone cared enough about him to care if he got hurt. "What about Siyet?" She suddenly blurted out, "I mean she cares about you and she'd be sad if something happened to you." She knew it wasn't actually her business but she felt it important that he know someone did care about him.
Speaking of the Lynx he spoke of it being the last threat at least for awhile. "Yeah, I think the pack needs some time to recuperate from everything that's happened this winter." A lot had happened and the pack just needed a little time to recover.
RE: contemplation - Jethro - Feb 24, 2022
Jet could not quite comprehend the fact that someone had never really thought about letting themselves just be in the moment, though he supposed it made sense. As of lately, his thoughts had, for the most part, always been occupied in one form or another. With thoughts of the dream he had for his future, or concerns for his friends, and such. The ability to tune all of that out, if even only temporarily, was perhaps one of the few blessings his terrible childhood had granted.
”It helps me. And I think everyone should.. try it, once in a while.” That obviously didn’t mean doing something stupid. That was one caveat Jethro didn’t think he needed to clarify for his present company. She seemed sensible enough to come to that conclusion alone.
The more Oksana explained her reason for expressing gratitude, the further insight he gained from it, as well. ”I do understand why you feel that way, I think. Guess I do feel the same when someone helps me out. I’m just not used to hearin’ it,” Jet admitted, for he could see the logic in that viewpoint as presented. ”But, I dunno any pack that would tolerate someone not doin’ anything to help, unless they’re sick, old, hurt, or somethin’. So I.. don't think there's much choice? Fact that I’m still here means I was doin’ something right.” He offered his company a loose shrug of his shoulders and a brief, toothy smile at that. ”I’m glad to be here too, though. And.. happy to hear I’m appreciated,” he admitted in addition.
The smile faded though, as the other’s next comment brought up Siyet, and pretty obviously suggested that she had shared their discussion about feelings with others in the pack. Jet could not stop himself from wincing, the movement suddenly reminded him he was standing chest-deep in water. ”I know. But.. she’d get over it.” A soft breath escaped him as he immediately realized the words came out a bit more callously than intended. Fixing his gaze on the other, Jet lowered his head a little and blinked apologetically. ”Even if she didn’t.. it wouldn’t be as bad as what you or someone else would feel, losin’ a mate, a kid, or a sibling.”
It wasn’t as if he wanted to be hurt or killed. But it was a calculation Jethro had run through in his mind over and over again, and to him, he was still the best one to take such a risk if the need ever arose. He knew he’d feel guilty if something happened to Oksana’s mate, or someone else’s sibling or kid, if he could’ve prevented it or taken their place. Hopefully, that would never happen.
”We got spring time comin’ up, too. Gotta be ready for.. that.” Jet added on to the last bit spoken by the other. All of the associated.. problems, work, and drama that went along with that. Jet was almost sure it wouldn't be an issue for him, but that there would be more pups to care for. At least the ones from last year would be coming of age and able to help before too long.
RE: contemplation - Oksana - Mar 02, 2022
Thinking about it Oksana couldn't ever remember a time when her mind wasn't working. Thinking about knew thing or another, sometimes it was like it never stopped. So the idea of just going somewhere and letting her thoughts go blank even for just a little while…well that was an appealing thought. It sounded rather relaxing and then she thought about the hot springs. She felt that would be an experience.
"I think I will sometime. The hot springs and just being in the moment," she sighed a smile across her features, "That sounds like a good way to get away from the stresses of life for a bit." Maybe the next time she came to help her leg feel a little better she would do just that.
Oksana smiled when he spoke of understanding what she meant. She nodded along with his words, "I'm not sure many of us are used to hearing it." She just didn't feel like it was something that went around in life very much. Jethro did have a point as he went on to talk about what packs would tolerate. "You're right of course, I agree I don't think they would tolerate that for very long." She supposed that she hadn't thought about that, "Even still it's not easy to come face to face with a fierce animal like the Lynx and fight it too." She offered the man a smile when he spoke of doing something right, "Yes, I would say that you have done something right." In fact she wasn't aware if anything he'd done wrong. "Do you like living on the mountain?" She suddenly asked when he spoke of being glad that he was there.
Oksana was a little worried that Jethro thought himself less than the others because he didn't have a mate or kids. Oksana of course didn't see it that way and before she could stop it she'd blurted out to him about @Siyet. She knew she shouldn't have but it was the only way she could think to maybe help him understand. The response she recieved was a little disappointing if she were honest but again she couldn't dispute it. Except for one thing, "I suppose you are right again. To lose Aleister… I would probably be devastated but I would just be worried how deep her feelings run for you. I mean she cares a whole lot about her friends."
Oksana knew that to be true because she'd experienced Siyets friendship herself and knew the pale woman would be there for her through anything. Her friend was one of those wolves that Oksana felt like she could truly trust. There weren't many wolves she felt that way about so Siyet was one of her cherished few.
"Yes, spring. I do remember what that means in a pack. It's such a busy time and I'm honestly not sure you can ever be ready." Oksana knew she surely wasn't ready for spring to arrive. She knew the kinds of things that could occur, she was one of those things that was a result of the drama that could be cause during the spring time.
RE: contemplation - Jethro - Mar 02, 2022
The dark one offered his present company a small smile as she expressed that she would try it, sometime, to get away from stress. He would not comment, but a tiny part of Jethro felt that, in spite of his wretched past, he did have the tiniest of advantages over some more.. normal wolves. After what he’d grown up in, for most of his time here, things had seemed almost too relaxed, and too easy. It did not cease to amaze him how differently some wolves thought and perceived things.
Oksana thought that he was right, but she made a good point, too. ”You’re right, too. Steppin’ up to fight isn’t.. for everyone. Maybe we all should hear that we’re appreciated for.. whatever it is we do and tell others that we appreciate them, more often.” The world would certainly be a better place, if folks could appreciate even the smaller things in life. His packmate definitely seemed to be onto something with that, the more he thought about it.
Her next question was something that Jet could have provided a number of responses to, but put most simply, he offered a nod. ”Yes. But I would be happy anywhere, long as there’s food, water, shelter, an’ good company. Have to admit, though, I am partial to the views, up here.” That was perhaps his favorite aspect of living at this elevation. The various views and fantastic vantage points that could be found in places were nothing short of stunning. Certainly the most significant was that area where he’d spent an evening with Nori, and later that.. odd, but not-so-bad other guy.
Jethro certainly did not take any pleasure in hearing that the other believed him right about his views on.. who would be the least saddening loss. The dark one lowered his gaze for a moment, studying his reflection in the water, touching his nose to it. ”She does. I wish.. that was all it was, though.” Friends. He recalled his last conversation with her. Jet hoped she had, or at some point would, move on from seeing him as any more than a friend. It would be to both of their benefit.
He was happy for a change of subject though, and let out a soft chuckle at the next comment. ”Maybe not. It’s comfortin’ to think maybe you can be, though.” That was one arena in which he had fairly limited experience, though, and was curious to see what it would bring for a pack like this one.
RE: contemplation - Oksana - Mar 04, 2022
Oksana listened to Jethro's opinion as he spoke of telling everyone they were appreciated. Especially in instances when they do something that might not be something they are comfortable with. She nodded along with his words, they were certainly something that needed to be taken into consideration. She didn't feel she would have a problem at all implementing it into her life and how she dealt with others.
"I agree, if we all did that the world would be a better place. No one would have to wonder if they did a good job. Even more it might even motivate others or build confidence where need be." She honestly couldn't see where it could go wrong.
She was curious about how he felt when it came to living on the mountain. She knew it wasn't for everyone. She herself had grown quite accustomed to the different terrain that it had as well as the dangers that came with living in such a place.
Oksana smiled when he mentioned the views, "They are something aren't they. It's different living on the mountain than it is in other parts of the lore. You're right though sometimes having food, water, and shelter is really all that is necessary but good company does make things a lot better." Which was another reason she'd chosen to stay. She'd made friends in Aleister and Chan and she hadn't really liked the idea of not having her friends around after being on her own.
Oksana worried about her friend and the fact that Jethro didn't return her feelings. She felt badly that the other woman hadn't gotten her happy ending but she held out hope that one day Siyet would find it just like she had with Aleister. "Maybe she just needs some time to get over those feelings," she offered because she understood what he meant. "Its not always easy for them to go away once they are there." Even if Siyet did get over them Oksana couldn't see her caring any less for the man in front of her.
Oksana wasn't entirely sure she was ready for spring in the cove pack. In Driftwood things were more controlled but that didn't mean it was that way in every pack. She'd missed it last year since she'd joined a few months after. She wondered how many pups the cove would have this year. She smiled at Jethro, "It is a nice dream to have and maybe I'm wrong. Mayne the cove is more prepared than I think or maybe it's just me that's not sure." Oksana knew what she wanted and knew deep down that she was ready for it but on the surface…well she might as well be a nervous wreck.
RE: contemplation - Jethro - Mar 05, 2022
Between words, Jet took a moment to unceremoniously dunk himself in the warm water, enjoying the feel of it. If it were possible, he supposed he wouldn’t have minded remaining here, in this very moment and place, forever. But that was not possible, sadly. What was even sadder, was how horribly he had misjudged the woman before him, now. If there was anyone deserving of being a leader, or a co-leader, she surely seemed to be it.
”It might. Of all the places you could’a gone, though, this pack is lucky to have ya, here. An’ I’m glad we finally got the chance to talk,” Jet spoke, offering the elder woman a nod of well-deserved respect. In his mind, she had certainly earned it. If Aleister was anything like her, even without Chan, the cove would still be guided by good hearts.
It helped that the other also shared his more pragmatic beliefs, as well. Good views or not, Jethro did not think there was any way in hell he’d have stayed here if it’d been by himself. Or maybe he would’ve, who knew. Either way, it would’ve beat that damn forest Nori had dragged him out of - and how he missed her. ”It sure does. I’d.. sure like t’see more of what’s around, though.”
Just as Oksana spoke about Siyet, in spite of just how long Nori had been gone, his feelings for her had only seemed to grow in that absence. Jet let his eyes close for a moment, offering the slightest of nods in agreement to what had been said. ”I know. I care very deeply for her, too. But.. I don’t want what she wants. If my heart belongs to anyone, it’d be.. Nori.” He glanced towards the other, to be sure she actually knew that name. He wasn’t sure how long Oksana had been around or if she’d met or heard of the Eastfall family’s young relative.
”Even if it isn’t.. this place’s got a lotta good folks around. One way or another, we’ll manage it.” Jethro wasn’t completely sure he’d be around for the whole period, considering. But for however long he was here, he knew he’d continue to do his part, too.
RE: contemplation - Oksana - Mar 11, 2022
Oksana took a moment to move her leg under the water. It felt so much better than when she'd first come to the hot springs. It was rather amazing how fast the hot water worked on her old injury. Looking over at Jethro she smiled when he dunked himself under the water. He was up a moment later but she didn't say anything allowing her thoughts to wander a little.
His next words touched her in a way that she hadn't been before. "Thank you Jethro, that is really nice of you to say and it means a lot." She said her smile having grown wider, "And I think the same is true for you too. I can't imagine the cove without you in it." She meant that because she felt he had done so much for them. "I'm glad we have this chance to talk too. I hope we can talk more in the future."
She would like to know more about the mysterious man sharing the springs with her. There was still so much more to learn about Jethro. She wished she'd had a chance to speak either him before that day. She supposed that she couldn't dwell on it now since they now had their chance.
There was plenty of truth to the words that were spoken about what is needed in life. Being on her own made her realize just how important good company was to anyone. It made the time go by easier especially when you didn't want to be left aline with your own thoughts. "There is a lot to see in the lore," she stated, "Have you thought of becoming a scout for the cove?" She asked knowing that was a good way to see many things.
Oksana remembered how upset Siyet had been after telling her what had happened between her and Jethro. She felt badly but as the man spoke she realized that it wasn't Siyet st all. Jethro loved another woman. "She is hurting now but I think she'll be okay in time. I think you did the right thing amd I'm sorry. Was Nori here?" Nori hadn't been in the cove when Oksana had joined.
His words made her smile again, "That is very true," she agreed, "Those words help make me confident that the cove can face anything the spring might throw at us." She just hoped it wasn't another Lynx or cougar. She wasn't sure she could face a cougar even if she wanted to.
RE: contemplation - Jethro - Mar 12, 2022
True to what Oksana had said earlier, and to what he had first heard from Nori so many months ago, it really did feel nice to be thanked, and appreciated. It was unfortunate that she might have to try to imagine the cove without him in the fairly near future, though that was not a subject he was quite ready to bring up with her, just yet.
”The feeling’s mutual. I appreciate you too, and I’d like that, to talk more, I think.” There was a lot he could learn from this woman, too, it seemed. A part of Jet once again wished he’d had figures like this around, when he had been been a pup. But it was better late than never, and maybe that would’ve had him turning out as some snobby asshole. Perhaps things really were better for him as they’d been.
Oksana’s follow-up suggestion would’ve been a good one, too, if he hadn’t already oriented his thoughts on becoming something much more than that. Something occurred to him that he hadn’t thought to ask before, though, as well. ”Scout’s not a bad idea,” he mused aloud, deciding to humor the suggestion. ”How much of it have you been through? Curious if there’s anythin’ you think is worth seeing.” Sightseeing was a penchant of his, and any ideas of things to marvel at - or better yet any potential tips on where he could make a possible future home, would be appreciated.
It was just a little disappointing that Oksana did not know who Nori was, but at least she did seem to understand. ”I hope yer right, for both our sakes. Nori, though, is.. part of the Eastfall family. Moonshadow’s granddaughter, Chan and Nash’s niece. She brought me here. The first one to ever give me a chance at anythin’.” And because of that, despite her absence, she held a particular place in his heart that Jethro did not think anyone else could ever quite meet. Which pained him all the more, when he considered that was how Siyet probably saw him. Which meant, he probably needed to tell her that, too.
Jethro found himself nodding along with the other again though, hoping she was right. It saddened him a little to think he might not be here for them, but these wolves were all capable. ”Ah. With you and Al guidin’ everyone, and with the talents the others have, yah.” The pack would pull through, undoubtedly.
RE: contemplation - Oksana - Mar 17, 2022
Oksana was glad to finally have the chance to speak to Jethro. She felt like he might be a good one to go to for another perspective of things. It was clear to her that he'd lived a different life than she had and it was even different than what Aleister had lived. She felt that sort of thing was valuable because she had learned that wolves came from all different backgrounds so it would be helpful to know how to relate to them.
She smiled when he spoke next, "You're really kind Jethro, don't sell yourself short. If you do need to talk I'm always available," she was sure to tell him. She really didn't mind being the one her packmates came to if they needed to talk about something. Being able to do that…she'd seen how much it had helped Aleister so she thought maybe she should try and do that for others too.
She felt that scout would be a good role for Jethro. He'd be able to see more of the lore while helping the pack and also have a home to come back to. "Its something to consider." She was a little surprised by his question but she was happy to share. "Quite a lot. I traveled some with my mother before it became dangerous and then when I returned some places have changed but underneath they are still the same." He also wanted to know of places worth seeing. This she gave some thought to. "The ethos but you have to go in the spring after the lavender has bloomed. It's in the north near a place called Kingsfall where the redwoods are. My family is buried there. Turtleneck lake is there too and it's quite a sight. Bramble falls in the heart just down the mountain is amazing in the warmer months and a place called Dogwood straith in Sacred Grove when the trees are in bloom." There were still so many places that she knew she couldn't name them all but she felt good that she'd given him a few places to start with.
Oksana felt that in time Siyet would be able to get over her feelings for Jethro. She listened as he spoke of Nori, she'd had no idea about the woman. "I can see why she means so much to you. I'm sorry she's not here with you Jethro. I hope one day she will return." She understood things a lot better and she felt bad for both Jethro and Siyet but it was ultimately between them. "What was she like? If you don't mind talking about her. It's okay if you don't want to." She didn't want to put him into an uncomfortable situation.
The more they talked about spring the more Oksana felt they could handle it. Even more she was actually looking forward to it. She knew the crazy part didn't last all spring so that too was a comfort. She smiled though when Jethro showed the confidence that he had in not only her and Aleister but in the pack as well. "You are right. This is a pretty amazing pack. The way everyone comes together. I haven't seen anything like it."
RE: contemplation - Jethro - Mar 17, 2022
With as many good wolves as the world seemed to have in it, now that he had ventured far beyond his birthplace, he was feeling more optimistic about his ability to gather a family of his own. The cove was a good place, and the values he had seen were things he hoped to spread, but if he was really going to do it, there would be one distinction. A lack of focus on bloodlines. If anything, he hoped to create a place free from any stigma that might surround such things. Hopefully, he could find others that needed it, when the time came.
Oksana offered one of the kindest compliments the dark one had ever heard, next. It was not the first time, but the novelty of it had still yet to wear off. Jethro bowed his head a little, flashing a sheepish smile. ”Appreciate that. Likewise, if y’ever need anything. To talk, or whatever, I got you, too.”
The other offered up a number of places to consider visiting, next, which she had seen and learn about during travels with her mother. The north, it seemed, held a number of sights worth seeing, including another lake. Considering how much he liked having a lake nearby, that would also be something he would want near his new home, if he did decide to venture out. There were a couple of other places too, one of which he was pretty sure he had seen, and others that would be worth a trip to, as well.
”Think I’ve seen the falls, actually. I did love it there,” he agreed with a nod. ”Gonna have to try to make it to some of those other places, too. Redwoods.. are them really massive trees, right? I’d.. love t’see that,” he added, trying to imagine such a thing. Just how big were those trees, compared to what he was familiar with?
It was something he couldn’t wait to see, and also something he would have particularly enjoyed exploring with Nori, as well. If only she were still here. Oksana’s questions brought the hurt he felt from all of that back to the forefront of his thoughts, but he did not mind sharing them. ”Thank ya. I.. don’t mind sharing. She was stubborn and sassy at times, but.. also nice and considerate. Pretty, too, but I never really got to tell her that. She was exactly what I needed, at the right time. Without her, I'd probably still be alone, if not dead, by now.” How he missed her. There was a lot that had gone unsaid, or had been mentioned in jest between them. While he could look back on their memories with a fond eye, there were other things he wished he’d had the opportunity to clarify.
Jet let himself nod to Oksana’s statement about the pack, for she was indeed correct. It was a shame that Nori couldn’t be here as well, to have experienced some of the things he had. Maybe, hopefully, as Oksana had said, she would return. By then, he might be gone - but maybe someone could point her toward him again.