Lately the mother found herself outside of the borders more often, trying to find any scraps of food to provide for her growing pack. Nina had no doubt that Hollow was doing the same when he knew that she was not out and about and was sure that he worried much when she was out, due to her disability with her eye. She was at a disadvantage outside of her territory on her own but she didn’t mind, she needed to find something of substance for the younger members of her family along with the children. Everyone who entered was another wolf that she had to make sure was strong and had enough to sustain them until the warmth returned to them. It was one thing that she desperately hoped for on a daily basis. By far, this was the coldest winter the former Hervok had ever encountered in her life and was thankful that she had a loving family to support her movements and not question her judgments, though she was gladly listen to any of their opinions.

She was returning from one of her outings with nothing to bare to her children and family. No herbs, no food; nothing. This winter she felt more than useless than she ever had, no longer would she have others who would be able to willingly provide for themselves and others, but they would all have to watch one another’s backs and protect one another. Secret Woodlands could not afford any injuries or something dying of starvation. Closing her single eye briefly she approached her borders once more, her single eye snapping towards a figure coming her way and immediately her breath was stolen from her. There he was, in all his glory, marking her borders just as he should have been doing for the past months when he had been absent. In an attempt to avoid his gaze and attention, the alpha spun on her heel into another direction of her territory and started towards the shadows, hoping she could turn there before her mate realized that she was in his presence, something that was probably attainable considering how aware they always were of each others’ bodies, but things changed, just as his vows had, and the woman had hope.

The woman thought she had almost made it, but just as she was about to cut into the shadows, the deep baritone voice behind her spoke, and Nina had to use every ounce of her control not to leave right then and run into the confines of her shadowy lands. Biting her tongue, she turned on her heel to face the much larger golden cream wolf in front of her with her single eye, her breath catching in her throat when she saw him closely. Knowing that she couldn’t avoid his gaze because that would be a disrespect to her rank, she raised herself tail and proud, just as any alpha would have and fixed him with a steely glance before any emotion could seep into her gaze, something that had always given away what she was feeling in the past, but today that wouldn’t happen, she would not allow him to get to her the way he had when he had once returned. For if he were to leave again, Nina knew that she would lose herself and the Secret Woodlands woman knew that she could never allow herself to get hurt the way she had when he left the first time ever again.

Clearing her throat, she spoke calmly, her voice monotone, ”Oh, Koda, I hadn’t seen you,” she lied easily before continuing, ”is there something I can help you with? I was just following the scent of rabbits.” As the strong scent of the animals tickled her nose, she thanked the Gods that she had been lucky enough for finding an excuse to avoid him. The pack did need food and during the spring and summer her excuse might have sounded fake, but now it was pretty real and serious. Her children and Bane needed food, anything really, that wouldn’t kill them, and so Nina had jumped on the chance to find something. But with her mate here, now perhaps she could catch more, even if she didn’t want to spend as much time with him. She kind of wished that Hollow would have been here to help her escape from this man in front of her. She had endured enough heartache since his return, but she would never voice these feelings out and instead waited for his reaction.

The mother was tense and watched every movement that her former mate made, making sure that he was not too close to her and that he was not touching her in any way. She had tried to keep her distance, but she knew that it was her duty as a leader to follow through with her duty and interact with her pack mates, most of whom she viewed as her own children. As she looked throughout the many wolves within her pack, Nina had grown accustomed to being the oldest within their pack, but now that Koda had returned that was no longer the case...it didn't matter though, because her partner and subordinates were still that much younger, which would eventually be good for the pack, should they decide to keep it running. At Koda's words, the mother narrowed her single eye at him, expecting him to realize what he had just suggested and laugh it off, but it seemed as though her former lover was being completely serious and the golden hued woman had to clench her teeth together to keep from sighing out in exasperation. Where was Hollow when she needed him?

Her nose twitched when the scent of a carcass was blown towards her, and in a haste she quickly changed her path, knowing that they were most likely going to find better substance with something that was already dead than with rabbits which could easily escape from them because their old joints wouldn't be able to propel them fast enough. Finally, she responded to Koda in a strong voice, ”No, I'd rather not bring up the past....let us get some food though, it will still be getting colder throughout the winter.” Not looking back to see if he was following, and not really caring, the mother whipped through her thickets, her single emerald eye happily landing on the carcass that seemed to have been killed by another animal. Not bothering with courtesies and remembering the rank that she had given Koda, she took pleasure in sitting down gracefully by the carcass and taking her fill, the only indication that the other male was allowed to eat with her was the brief flick of her tail and ears.

She remained silent, her jaws working on the meat that was slightly frozen, but defrosted enough to the point that she would be able to digest it. She didn't pay much attention to Koda until he finally settled down across from her and a deep frown made its way onto her face as she watched him eat. Clearing her throat, she spoke calmly, ”You shouldn't eat so fast. It will give stomach pains to you, and no herbs I have will be help of much.” She narrowed her eyes at the cream colored man before her before continuing her meal. Hopefully, she would be able to bring back some to the three children that remained under her care, and she had no intentions of ever letting them starve as she was their mother, and would never dream of harm becoming them. When her former lover spoke once again, Nina's head finally lifted, her emerald eye staring at him, not mentally scolding herself for such rudeness.

She already knew the answer the his question, but didn't know the best ways of going about it. Taking a deep breath to calm her racing mind, Nina spoke, ”The only thing I can see our relationship becoming is a friendship and nothing more...love never dies Koda...but neither do memories, and unfortunately trust dies with those too.” She didn't want him to leave, she was offering her home to him, the place where he had been able to regain his memory, but with it a new side of him. It didn't surprise the woman much anymore, she knew what brain damage could cause, she had just wanted to elude herself to believing that he would be a special case, and in the end it had led to her own heartbreak. She couldn't completely blame him, it was her fault too for allowing herself to believe that things could have gone back to the way they were before.