Hush Meadow It's Time

Narime only please

It had been a long and complicated decision that had caused him to show up at the edge of Whisper Cavern's territory just before the start of winter. It probably wasn't his best decision but he no longer felt like he was safe with such a leader as Ash leading. With Titan's leave, he felt like he had no more responsibility. Still, he would not leave unless Narime allowed him to leave. Despite his unhappiness, he did not want to be an enemy or a deserter. He wanted to remain on good terms with her. He only hoped that it was possible. With a deep and independent breathe, he let out a fierce howl as a call for the queen of the Caverns.

Part of him felt like he belonged in the caverns while the rest of him knew he did not. The fact was that he had grown into a reclusive nature. He did not want to tell Ash of his leave because he knew of the uncontrollable anger that it might cause. Perhaps it was foolish, but he was terrified of Ash. Perhaps it was rightfully so but he had no idea. He let his howl fade away as he waited at the borders like a nervous tick. The dark tawny man took a step over the border in case he had to make a quick escape away. He honestly had no idea how Narime was going to react but it worried him. "Please don't hate me."

Could I get a post over in the blackbird thread maybe? *begs cutely*

The gray woman was flitting about the tunnels checking on whoever was there and making sure everything was alright. The herb den was filled, Kassander had been there recently by the smell of it, and everything was nice and orderly. She was pleased with this even though Kassanders only patient @Borden Lyall had some kind of incurable mental illness. She didn't think that anyone could really help the elder male anymore. With Rook gone now Nari felt an awful sense of foreboding touch her as she thought of the boys father. He didn't have any family here now, so she wondered if he would try to leave, or if the illness would make the male worse. She wondered if it would take so much memory away from him that Borden wouldn't remember his family or why he was even there. The silver wolf could see that situation possibly turn dark or scary. Pushing herself towards the entrance of the den now, Nari lets her tongue loll from her mouth. It rolls over her lower jaw and hangs there as the woman pants with stress. Lots of things were happening all at once. Rook leaving, Titan leaving, Namid and Bishop disappearing, Borden getting used to the pack, and with the tensions from Cut Rock River so high has kept the queen at full alert for most of the Fall. She was tired of it, the change that happened every moment of the day. She just wanted to sleep, or to have a few days or moments where nothing mattered anymore. A howl at the border from Kassander caught the she wolf off guard. She wasn't expecting it nor was she expecting it to sound so fierce. Nari reacted immediately sending up a short call of her own so that he knew that she was coming then darting off in the healers direction. Once she spotted the male Nari let an inquisitive look scratch into her features. She slowed herself to a stop before the male then smiled in greeting. "I haven't seen you around Kass, where have you been at? " Nari asked casually. The she wolf did not know that soon her heart would be torn yet again.

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(This post was last modified: Nov 18, 2014, 05:03 PM by Narimé.)

As usual, Narimé was right on time as she swiftly responded to his call for her. She seemed so innocent and clueless to the situation that Kassander had been going through constantly for the past month. These next words stung his heart. "I am so sorry, Narimé. I can't stay here anymore. I don't feel safe." The words were struggled as he fought back the emotions he was facing. His breathing was ragged and he knew he should explain more but he didn't know how. He didn't feel safe or secure with Ash leading beside the queen of the Caverns. "Here I was, trying to remain loyal. That fact is that with him leading with all of the anger and rage I've seen him display, I don't feel safe. One day, I fear he'll explode." The fears were silly but it was how he felt. Deep down he knew that all of the times Ash had snapped at him, the leader had been under stress.

"Everytime I do my job with him around there is always something. Athena at the borders, she was injured and I was a healer but instead I was told to go do something useful. I was trying to be useful. She probably would have died of infection if she had been turned away. I could have saved more of her face if I had gotten to her sooner. Danica was injured while I was off searching for herbs and I was penalized for it." Those were the two big things that the man had remembered. He didn't like forgiving and forgetting very much. Kassander gulped, sadness filling his eyes as he gazed upon the queen. "But I won't leave you on ill terms."

(This post was last modified: Nov 18, 2014, 07:53 PM by Kassander.)

Her smile and wagging tail very quickly disappeared as Kassander got right to the point. She tensed as he apologized and told her that he couldn't stay anymore. Her chest clenches as Nari's eyes widen in in shock. She didn't know that things were going badly between Kassander and Ash. She didn't get the chance to comfort the male before he started talking again. As Kassander refers to Ash leading Nari bites her lip conflicted with herself. She wants to both defend Ash and say that he's been doing well as a leader, but at the same time she wants to comfort Kassander and acknowledge how... strict? No... How different it was with Ash leading compared to when Sloane led. Maybe harsh was a better word for it, but Nari couldn't deny that his way of leading had helped them through some of the lowest points of the packs history. As Kassander goes on about how the Hervok man treated him Nari casts her eyes downward. She was sad for the man, to have built up all this anger and fright inside of him the whole time without her noticing. However she sensed that there was more to his feelings than just being scared of Ash. She could see plainly, that Kassander didn't like Ash leading them. Closing her eyes and letting a sigh escape past her lips, Nari tries to collect herself. She had to be strong for Kass, even if his ultimate decision might be to leave. "Ash might be big and strong... but you are fast and witty. You.. You could challenge him. " She looks away while allowing heat to creep into her cheeks. Kassander had been there for her ever since he had joined them, and Nari truly did care for the healer. She wished and hoped that he could excel and do whatever he wanted to do. Even if that meant trying to take over as leader. She knew better though, that Kass hated fighting. "I know that you don't like battle... but sometimes a wolf must. Especially if they believe that they are doing the right thing. The pack is doing fine now, but who knows if you led then you might make it better. It's all up to you though, I can't tell you what to do here, because I feel for Ash as much as I do for you. " Her words came out gently but hushed so that only Kassander and she could hear them. "I know things... Secrets to Ash. The reasons why he is the way he is, and because of that I can understand him. Though I think he can be helped. I've been trying to help him calm that anger. So I get what you mean, I didn't like him or his attitude at first either. You just.. Have to get to know him." A little bit of desperation etched into the womans voice as she tried to keep her composure. Kassander was the only other trusted wolf she had in her ranks a part from Yuka. If she lost him, Nari wasn't sure if she would be able to trust anyone but her closest kin.

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Kassander's words had obviously affected the leader which had in turn affected him. There were several reasons other than the spite he held for Ash's actions that were causing his leave. Part of him just couldn't sit there as she led beside the other male. He was a follower and he knew that if he were to challenge for leadership, as he had considered only a few times, he would loose sorely to the current king. When Narime suggested it, he was shocked. She was suggesting that he challenge Ash? Does that mean that she was willing to risk Kass being there over the leader who she had seemed to be close to. She spoke of secrets but he shook his head, the emotions showing across his body as he tried to compose himself.

He was the Doctor and she was his Rose Tyler. "Narime, I am no leader and he would destroy me in a fight. Nari... I, I have to leave unless you can promise change. But that's the thing, you can't because it's not you that is the problem. I am so sorry and I will stay if you want me to. I'll never leave unless you willingly let me." The words were so close to escaping his muzzle but he forced himself to take keep them in. His last secret that he was too scared to admit. The words, so quiet and hushed that he wasn't even sure she could hear him when he said the three words. Just three words. "I love you."

Feel free to stay and try to comfort her a little.

With a whine Narime listened as Kassander apologizes but continues to plead with her about leaving. If he really wanted to leave she wouldn't stop him from doing so. She closes her blue eyes and allows a small cry to slip from her throat before Nari feels her chest tighten. She shakes her head roughly then bites her lip to keep from making anymore pathetic noises. She had to be strong now, she couldn't look like this if any other pack members decide to show up. Then three small words she almost didn't catch fell from Kassander's parted lips. I love you. Those three words rocked her and made strong hard Nari take a step back. Then the astonishment on her face turned to rage. "If you really loved me you would fight for me, just as I am willing to stand by you! I can't promise change, but I can promise to try and figure out how to really love. How to ignore lust and search for the real feelings." Nari screams at him while her fur begins to bristle. She stares at him for a moment more before closing her eyes again and pawing at her face and muzzle. "No.. You don't love me. Not if things are turning out like this." Nari's confused ramblings go on as she shakes her head once more and backs up a few more paw steps. "Fine.. leave me.. You won't be a traitor, or.. or a anything to us. I don't care anymore. Nothing ever works out in the end." Narime looks to the earth refusing to meet Kassander's loving gaze. She just couldn't.

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There was a stab of emotions in his heart when she went off on him, exploding all of her rage as he stood there and took it. It was just like his parent’s constant yelling which frightened him but he had long since forced those memories into a repressed part of his mind. He didn’t even shed a tear as he held his loving gaze and she refused to meet his eye. It was then that he spoke, his tone serious and slightly depressed. Had anyone noticed the changes in behavior and the reclusiveness of the healer as of late. He had to stay calm with his eyes focused on her grey form. "You don't understand - you might never understand my reasons. YA vsegda byl nichego, i ya vsegda nichego ne budet. YA zhalkiy, slabyy, i moi roditeli byli pravy. YA pozor dlya Shepot Peshchery Narimé i mne pora izbavit' vas ot vashikh problemy." He had subconsciously switched to Russian without realizing it.

The sadness, desperation and quiet nature had been evident in his tone when he spoke. He turned away from her, preparing to leave so she wouldn't have to put up with him anymore. He didn't know if there was anything else to say. He didn't know what else he could possibly say. He let a tear escape while his back was turned. He started to walk off, taking his time to leave the home he had grown accustomed to. He remembered when he had first joined. Ash had been so nice... and then he wasn't. Kassander had never even gotten to meet with this healer Ash knew of like was promised to him.

One more from you as an exit and then my last one will be ten :D

Narime wasn't listening to reason anymore. Although, even if she had been the silver wolf would not have been able to understand it for the healer spoke the last of his words in Russian. Narime had only ever learned a tiny bit of the Xanilov's language. She might have understood "problems" and "parents" in the jumble of Russian but that was about it. The gray she wolf had not spent enough time learning the mysterious language from dear Kassander. She listened as Nari looked at the dirt. She listened for Kassander to say more, to tell her what he was trying to say but couldn't. Instead her ears picked up on his paw steps as the gray and rust male slowly turned and began padding off. Suddenly her paws gripped at the dirt. Her legs tensed as her body lurched forward after Kassander. Nari began to panic as her legs lifted and took her a few paces forward to follow the depressed healer. Why were her legs not listening? Why couldn't she just stand in place and let him leave? Instead her paws wanted to follow him. Thoughts of leaving with Kassander did float idly through her mind as Nari slowly followed the male. However as her thoughts turned to Yuka, her son and a free wolf who had stayed with her throughout everything bad; Nari found the strength to stay. A long loud snarl erupted from her muzzle as Nari growled at herself for being so stupid. She snarled at her emotions which seemed to be tearing her into two separate directions. Then in an act of desperation, Nari bites at her forelegs making herself stop. Her blue eyes flit around at everything but Kassander as the woman squares her legs evenly over the earth and forces herself to stay still. She then grips the earth as if she were about to float away from it, and concentrates on her childrens faces while listening to see what Kassander would do.

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The man was torn by pain and love as he looked back at Narime one last time. He couldn't let himself have the happy ending. He didn't deserve his happy ending and he certainly did not deserve the femme who led the Cavern wolves. Yet, he could not be around her without having her as his own which was one large reason for his leave. His heart felt heavier with every step he took away from the silver queen. With a small whine in goodbye, he finished his leave, taking off with tears leaking through his eyes - the tears had been present when he had turned to look at her only to see herself biting her legs. Why was she biting her legs? Why?

He headed east because he had always traveled west too many times. He'd make himself sure to find a pack before winter hit in full force which did not leave him with much time. Perhaps he should just leave or maybe he should just end it all. Could he end himself? Could he end the pain of separating himself from almost everything he cared about? Titan was gone to Willow Ridge. Narime couldn't see the evil in Ash that Kassander had seen. Perhaps Kass was just imagining the evil. It would make since as to why Narime could not see it if he was indeed imagining it. He wanted to take off into the sky like Mary Poppins or something. He wanted to promise the woman he would be back but the fact was he could make no such promise without lying. He was an honest man if nothing else.

-EXIT-

Holding her breath for what seemed like a millennia, Narime stood rigid only barely listening to the world around her. Everything was silent for the most part. The birds had quieted their songs, the wind had stilled, and the rustlings of small creatures in the undergrowth had disappeared. However Nari felt as if her ears were being drowned in the noises of her thudding heart as well as the sounds of Kassanders paws thudding softly upon the earth. Soon though, even those sounds died down. Now the paw steps were gone, and the only noise Nari could hear was the beating of her heart. The ache to breath forced the female to let out a fast and harsh whine. Her breathing was shaky as she looked up from the earth to see that Kassander had indeed gone. His scent was even beginning to stale as she leaned forward to sniff at the earth. Sadness was once again overwhelmed by anger, causing Nari to grit her teeth as she stamped her slightly injured leg down roughly. Dammit Nari... Make a new rule. No getting close to anybody unless they've been with you for.. fo..for more than a year.. She desperately tried to tell herself without snarling. Unfortunately she had forgotten that Kassander had been with her for almost as long as her new self imposed rule stated. For a long time she just stood there baking in the anger of the moment until slowly it began to dissipate. Slowly sadness and an awful empty feeling consumed her. It was around that time that the she wolf turned to wander back towards her territory. By looking at her no one could really tell what was going through the she wolf's head. (exit) "Speech"

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(This post was last modified: Jan 04, 2015, 10:10 PM by Narimé.)