White Fir Notch And I feel a weakness coming on

OOC: For @Sylva, backdated to 3/17. 

3/17/2016
Weather:
30° F, -1° C
Breezy, Partly cloudy. 
1:18 PM

She might have heard it referred to as 'morning sickness,' but she was finding that the nausea came around whenever it pleased, whether the sun was high or not. Thankfully it was not all that often, but still more often than the Matriarch would've liked. Her pregnancy was long past certain, but the worries were ever present. Was everything normal? Would the pups make it to term? The birth itself weighed heavily on the woman's mind, and thinking about it too long worked her into internal hysterics. Raela tried not to dwell on that which she had no control over, especially when the potential rewards for her coming trial would be more than worth it... hopefully.

Instead she tried to focus on what they might look like, or how many there would be. Boys? Girls? It was difficult though, to maintain these more positive wonderings when her stomach was behaving so. It had been a few days since the last bout, and when the dreaded feeling hit the Queen knew exactly what was going on. No one else was lingering by the den with her that afternoon; there was so very much to do and Raela would have been out there with them, had she not been saddled with abnormal levels of fatigue. That too could be attributed to the tremendous task her body was undertaking. 

It was still early too, and the first time mother was well aware that her discomfort would only worsen over time. How surprisingly volatile her own dam had been, and on an Asurn leader that extra temper was nothing short of terrifying. Raela had at first hoped that she would only have to avoid the others during her season, but the mood swings would persist much longer than that. She quickly heaved upward from her sprawled position on the den floor; not about to spill her last meal on communal ground. The promised embarrassment was more than enough, but her pack deserved better than that as well.

She was tempted to lurch into a lope, but the bouncing motion would only make her more nauseous. A swift, gliding trot was enough. The agouti-pelted woman swallowed repeatedly, willing the acid to stay put until the den was long behind her. She was afforded just barely that amount of cooperation, before being forced to veer sharply off-course in favor of a nearby cluster of spindly bushes. When the helpless foliage was at last left alone and her insides settled once more, Raela turned toward the river. The cool water was perfect for washing away the foul-tasting acid and she lapped it up vigorously. The waters were flowing well now, with a few inches of thin ice only managing to cling to the banks.

Grass had even begun to show in the open areas, though the ground was unpleasantly muddy if the temperature got any higher than freezing. Thankfully today it wasn't that bad. Raela withdrew her tongue from the refreshing liquid and leaned back; descending gingerly onto her stomach to watch the water drift by. The matriarch sighed. The sooner all of this was over, the better. 

(This post was last modified: Apr 01, 2016, 01:46 AM by Raela.)

            

One young wolf

Sylva hummed quietly to herself as she trended along a small narrow trail. Her small chocolate black tail swishing happily behind her as she moved. The Yearling had a lot to be happy for. The pack had successfully moved, there may have been an injury, but no lives had been lost and for that Sylva had been extremely grateful. Ears pricked slightly as the gentle whispers of the river called out and Sylva veered off the trail, her tongue licking against her rubbery lips in anticipation to sate the thirst that had built up.

Soft brown eyes suddenly became filled with worry as a sour smell hung in the air as she came closer toward the water source. Sylva paused as she came to the culprit, a vomit covered patch of brush. “Oh..who did this to you..” She quietly whispered as her nose wrinkled at the smell, underlying the reek of acidic digestive juices laid the smell of Sylva’s Alpha and she suddenly felt a small twinge of embarrassment that she hadn’t picked up on it before. She turned her muzzle toward the source of the scent and sniffed carefully as she began to follow it toward the river’s edge.

There she is! Sylva perked up as she took note of the now familiar contrasting pelt of Raela and she yipped in greeting as she picked up her pace, to skid to a halt mere feet away from the laying female. "Whoa, you look like crap."

That was the first thing the healer in training noticed and thought, She couldn’t help it. The young wolf sometimes spoke what words came to her mind without realizing it, unaware that this was one of those situations where just  a small measure of tact would have gone a long away. Though, at least she was honest. She noticed Raela’s more, well she wasn’t sure else to put it but sick demeanor and soon worry started to feel the small wolf as she quickly dipped her head to her superior.

"Are you ok, Raela?"

ThoughtDialogue

(This post was last modified: Mar 31, 2016, 12:06 AM by Sylva.)

Her eyes were fixed ahead, following the steady pace of the river as she felt the new emptiness at her core. As if she wasn't tired enough already; whenever her stomach rebelled like this it was doubly exhausting. Raela's gaze was only half-open, her head resting drearily between two creamy paws. At least the nausea was gone. The sun was warm on her russet back; and all in all it was a pleasant day. Perhaps if she just laid here a while... 

The Queen's ears shot upward as an excited 'yip' broke the silence. Golden eyes whipped around to find the brown-black form of their youngest member bounding forward, and she exhaled. Just Sylva. The older woman watched placidly, pulling her head inward a little just in case the girl wasn't able to stop in time. Raela had seen her stumble enough to know she was just as likely to be tripped over laying here like this. Thankfully Sylva remained upright, but the words that jumped from her mouth knitted the matriarch's brows in a scowl anyway. 

One side of her mouth drew back in a wry grimace; she knew she looked awful when she was like this. A tinge of embarrassment tugged at the back of the woman's mind; had the girl smelled her vomit already, or worse, found it? Hopefully not. That was exactly what she'd been trying to avoid. Her normally sweet honey eyes stared with dull resentment, but not rejection. Sylva was probably right.  Under her gaze the young girl bowed her head; a serious, worried tone replacing the crude one. Her expression softened, and the Matriarch sighed deeply. 

Her golden pools swept back toward the water. "I'm alright," she reassured, trying feebly to smile a bit for effect. "...just feel a little sick, it's something that happens when you're–" The words had started falling from her lips without much thought, but now she hesitated ever so slightly. "–pregnant." All of the other adults knew by now; it was obvious in her scent, and the way her heat had ended so quickly. However, Rae could not assume that the dark yearling had figured it out; a realization that suddenly hit her square on the head. Sylva had not even been through her first spring as anything more than a baby herself; and Raela wasn't so sure that any of the others would've explained things to her yet. The woman's eyes were wide and steady, watching for an unpredictable reaction.  

            

OOC! OOC Note<3

Sylva nodded her head slowly as Raela insisted that she was fine, even though to the small wolf, the matriarch looked like something a bear dragged through the bushes, but with their recently injured packmate, she had a feeling that it wouldn’t be wise to give voice to this observation. Instead her hazel eyes went wide at the news. “Pregnant?” She paused for a moment, somewhat unsure what the term meant exactly, but sniffing the air, under the rancid scent of the vomit, there had been a distinctive lack of a particular smell.

“You don’t smell weird anymore! Does that mean you and Gent are having puppies? Im guessing that’s what pregnant means?” As she thought about the happy news, Sylva bounced a little where she stood before settling down on her haunches. Her demeanor became more calm as the news brought up some old curiosities “Hey Raela….I have a question about it…”

She paused for a moment, about to pour into another long winded tale about exactly how she came across the thoughts, but Raela’s words echoed in her head and she stopped herself. How would we ask it? Should we be blunt? Tactful..is there even a tactful way to ask? She opened her maw to speak, but paused in hesitation.

Unable to decide which method to use, the yearling fell back on her most trusted form, blunt honesty. “So...where does life come from?” The question had been floating through Sylva’s mind for awhile, ever since she noted the changes between the seasons, old trees dying, new trees growing, animals aging and being fed on. Where did it all began though?

ThoughtDialogue

(This post was last modified: Mar 31, 2016, 02:21 AM by Sylva.)

There is a family of deer nearby. Hunt Opportunity

Predictably, surprise took the smaller female's features first, and a tentative, creeping grin began to spread over Raela's maw. She parroted the word, and the Queen began to nod; watching the girl mull it over. There was more confusion than excitement at first, and the older wolf began to wonder If Sylva even knew what the word meant. Her next few sentences revealed that no, she did not. Interestingly though, the yearling was aware of the implications all the same. Raela's teeth showed in a wide smile at the mention of her mate, and the way her youngest member took to bouncing in place. It was always so fun to tell the others about the coming children. 

"Yeah," she affirmed, her tawny tail thumping against the cold ground. What she hadn't expected was how quickly Sylva's demeanor began to shift. The normally energetic pup grew quiet, and serious. Raela's smile faded, vanishing entirely when the final question was posed. Well that was much deeper conversation than she had been expecting. The Queen was taken aback, her eyes roaming over the girl's curious face for a few wordless moments. It wasn't something she often pondered, and it certainly hadn't been discussed back home. Asurns had no interest in anything other than the physical, and Raela herself was not entirely different most days. 

Still, she could admit to certain things having to do with what others called 'spirits', particularly the connection she still felt with Tolas – but the start of it all? That was much more difficult to answer. "Well..." the older woman began, still searching for just how to reply. "I suppose it comes from other life." Her words were slow and cautious. "Babies draw life from their parents." Her grin returned faintly; the knowledge of what miracles were taking place within her would never be anything less than wondrous. "...trees from other trees... and that's how it's been for as long as anyone can remember." She had heard talk of deities before, but they always seemed to be the untouchable musings of wolves who were really just as ignorant as everyone else. No one could know, and maybe that was just fine. "It's sort of a... constant– an endless cycle." Raela clarified. At least to her, that's how it seemed. Sunshine eyes focused on the river again. "Like how the rivers are always full of water, even though they're always moving." Perhaps that would be enough to sate the pup's curiosity ...for now. 

(This post was last modified: Mar 31, 2016, 02:52 AM by Raela.)

            

OOC! OOC Note<3

The chocolate black wolf perked he rears forward in interest. For a pup with the attention span of a squirrel, she could be very intent when the subject was worth it. Her hazel brown eyes blinked slowly as Raela speculated that life came from other life. Her tail flicked a little as rivers were mentioned and Sylva angled her head toward the nearby river as she pulled herself to her paws and stepped toward it. Sylva had always felt something special for rivers, unknown if it was just a childish thought or an actual special connection, she wasn’t sure, but she did know that they seemed to be pivotal in the course of her life.

”I always knew it…” She murmured quietly, forgetting about Raela’s presence for a moment as she stared at her reflection in the running water “Always knew you were more than just a river, you lead me here.”[/B] She pressed her nose against the river’s surface as another thought came across her mind and she settled down with her back toward the river as she focused back on Raela “But...Rivers have a source, if life is like a river...then doesn't that mean that life had to start from somewhere? Like how a river has a source, wouldn’t life in the beginning?” Sylva could accept the concept of a river being the source of life, but she needed to know how it came to be, where did the water come from? Where did it go? Did it feel wet when you shoved your muzzle into it?

ThoughtDialogue

That Sylva moved toward the river was unsurprising; but the way she spoke to it was as strange as it had always been. Raela had learned to just let it be; her words hurt no one, no matter how unsettling they could be. She was silent until the dark yearling decided to speak directly to her, and the words she chose drew a puzzled look. A source? As soon as the girl stopped speaking, the response was ready on the older woman's tongue. "In all my time I have never seen a river begin, or end." It was true; the water seemed to be infinite, though she had some further information to offer. "I've seen them grow thin to a tiny trickle, or wide like a lake, and even go up the sides of mountains and under the ground, but never end." 

"I don't think there was ever a beginning to life, perhaps in the individual sense there is." Wolves lived and died all the time, but wolves as a whole, they had been around forever. "But life itself has always been," she added, glancing around them. There was nothing the older woman had ever found to suggest otherwise. "If it did have a beginning, no one knows what it is, though some will claim to." Her face turned more serious now as she regarded the young one. "Even they all have different answers, and none have ever proved them." She didn't much care for the tales of magical beings and mind-blowing power. It didn't matter. What mattered was where the food was going to come from, and how they were going to make it to the next day. Never had her life of disbelief impeded her in any of that. 

"But I wouldn't worry about it," she continued, stretching her forelimbs. "All I know is that it's going to continue just like it always has." 

(This post was last modified: Mar 31, 2016, 03:58 AM by Raela.)

            

OOC! OOC Note<3

Sylva’s head tilted a little to the side as Raela spoke “But it isn’t just always there is it?” The dark furred youth’s curiosity was well and truly aroused now that Raela mentioned that some wolves claimed to know about the beginning. What if they do though? it was something that fascinated Sylva, what if some wolf out there did hold the answers she was seeking. Raela’s unspoken warning to disregard any such tales nor claims fell on deaf ears as the yearling set aside plans to try and find some of these wolves, she could at least listen to what they’d have to say right?

“Where did you come from?” Sylva suddenly blurted out as she stepped toward Raela and settled down directly next to her Alpha and turned her muzzle toward the Aguti in curiosity. The thoughts about the origins of life abandoned for now as she realized that they may have talked about Sylva’s past in time, but she hadn’t even heard where Raela hailed from before she had come to what was once Round Stone Crest. “Oh! I mean, if you don’t mind us asking..I don’t wanna cause any discomfort or anything.”

Sylva’s tail thumped once in embarrassment as she realized that she may have just broken some complex unspoken social code and it scared her. It scared her to the point that some time she would hold her tongue in fear of saying something wrong, but at other times, words would still slip through. “That’s another question, is it alright to ask stuff like that?”

ThoughtDialogue

By some miracle, the young wolf had remained quiet until the last utterance had fled from her leader's tongue; but only that long. An ear cocked to the side mid-stretch to receive the repeated question. Had that not been what the woman had just said? It seemed Sylva was dead set on this train of thought, and instead of jumping to correct her or argue further, it was Raela who fell silent. The pup would have to figure these things out for herself in time; all the Alphess could do was impart her personal experience and opinions. That, and she wasn't much in the mood to press the issue any more. 

Lazy golden eyes had drifted back to the rolling river when another very unexpected question slipped into the air. The older woman turned, watching as her subordinate moved in closer and reclined as well. That wasn't something she talked about often either; the girl was just full of important queries today, wasn't she? Deciding not to let her moodiness get the better of her, Raela began to form her response in her mind, interrupted once more by Sylva's social clumsiness. The consideration on her part was progress, and it was appreciated. A faint smile spread onto the agouti woman's face and her tail wagged softly across the stiff grass. 

Air puffed from her nose in acknowledgment. "It's alright; that's a pretty normal question, but if the person seems like they don't want to talk about it, it's usually better not to push them." At least she was learning. Raela's happy expression dimmed then. She needn't go into detail; it was heavy stuff, especially for this unpredictable young lady. "I lived a long ways away," she started, directing her eyes eastward and finding that the towering mountain range blocked her view. It was beautiful though; much more beautiful than the images in her mind; the things she knew laid somewhere beyond. "...and the wolves I lived with were cruel." Her normally sunny eyes fell from the snow-dusted peak. No more. 

"They chased me out when I was two, and after a while I found the Crest," The matriarch's gaze fell more softly on the dark girl as she went on. "That was just last year, but back then it was run by a different lead pair, and it was called Black Thorn Downs." Memories of that winter, that spring and the puppies, of Astraeus and the others tugged at her chest, but she latched onto that which had saved her before. Gent had been there too. "Gent joined shortly after I did, actually," she added, thankful to have her mind distracted for just that moment. "We had trouble with another pack, and they decided to move north, to where the Crest was, and rename the pack." She made sure to leave Secret Woodlands out of it; even if she was still upset over Lugh, they were making amends, and the perpetrators weren't there anymore. They needed to move past it. It was Iopah and the others who would draw her ire now, if they ever came near her new home, her paradise.  

It was turning into a history lesson, but perhaps the new girl needed it, and Raela didn't mind. Talking about this was sort of, cathartic. "But, the lead pair passed away; and left behind their puppies, all of which disappeared before you arrived." Again the details were skimmed over. She didn't need to know about all the hurt between the lines. "So me and Gent stepped up, and here we are," she concluded, once more taking in the beauty of their new home. Maybe it had been a blessing in disguise after all. 

(This post was last modified: Apr 01, 2016, 10:17 PM by Raela.)