Altar of Fire Who Is [S]he?

cw: Marian swearing again

Being angry was well and truly exhausting, like someone had lifted the plug and all of the good parts of her were seeping away down the drain. It wasn't as though Marian was grasping onto the hurt and spite for the sake of it, they clung to her like thorns and the harder she tried to rip it out the more entangled it became. It was getting difficult for her to tell where the rage began and where her true feelings ended, the hurt hiding in the corners of her vision as she tried desperately to look away. But the storm that rumbled above was just as stubborn as her inner turmoil, the sky flashed white as she clambered up onto a flat rock and landed in a slump, her chin level and her gaze downcast.

She was told she'd been born during a storm very much like this, it was bad omen some had said.

All of that shit paired with raging hormones and incessant heat and she was already fraying at the corners, grumpy in ways that put even her Father to shame. Go figure that at her lowest she'd become the spitting image of the guy she most liked to poke fun at. Tis the way the dirt crumbled she supposed. The thunder finally came and the ground seemed to quake beneath her, little rocks clicked against the stone before falling still. Marian swatted them aside just for the sake of it, her bright gaze following the movement with lazy interest.

(This post was last modified: Mar 19, 2021, 06:43 PM by Marian.)

Sita had been pondering the way of things. Inspite of her still-hormonal state, there was a twinge of guilt for pulling Azra along like that. He had been kind to her and the manipulation was thoughtless in the moment. Consequences. Perhaps she was testing this newfound freedom a bit too much, toeing past the line. And then she considered Marian, Azra's companion, whom she assumed had eyes for him and she had treated him in such a manner that would have likely upset her.

The girl was not entirely pleasant, but Sita did not see her as a threat. So why not try to make some good? Even if it may have been like digging at stone. The thunderstorm framed things in a way that Sita was not a fan of. Why couldn't it be a sunny day to lift the spirits a bit as she tried to worm her way into Marian's good graces. That was if she could even find the woman. She'd followed her scent until the storm hit, dulling it. All she could smell was wet grass. It was nice in its own way, but not what she was trying for. A boom of thunder rattled the earth as Sita strolled into the glen, blue eyes lifting to scan the area for a dark form. And what luck, there she was.

"Marian?" Sita called out, her voice light, trying to be friendly and not sounding like someone commanding her presence.

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Marian's choice of location ought to have made it obvious she wasn't out looking for company, she'd split off from the group as soon as she'd been able. She hadn't felt a pull to announce her reasoning or even say goodbye, Prickhead aside they were all strangers and from the way he'd acted it seemed as though she hadn't known him half as well as she thought. Ah well, lesson learned. Except that Sita couldn't seem to take the hint, seeking her out as though they were fast friends, ready to battle through thick and thin.

Nah.

Cutting right to the chase, Marian spoke out, drawing attention to herself as she laid there. Not thinking that it was even worth the effort to get to her paws.

"Oh what's up whore-I mean... Sita, was it?" She barely lifted her jaw off the floor to yawn before sitting up a little straighter, her tail tapping against the cold stone. "I'm afraid I don't have a cock, so you'll have to go somewhere else if you're hoping to spread your legs again." Her words were wry but there was no warmth of humour in her voice. She meant every word and more.

Yes, it had been quite some time since she'd seen Marian. She ought to have assumed the worst, that being Marian splitting from them. Sita should have left well enough alone, maybe. But she wasn't interested in leaving enemies in her wake. Not if she could help it. Marian's words were cruel, but Sita did not let them shake her. She wasn't silly and knew what she'd done. But she did have to restrain an eye roll as she approached.

"I suppose it's good that's not why I'm here, then." She sat a few feet away, curling her toes against the rock as she settled. "I wanted to apologize. We never got off on the right foot. And it was downhill from there." Sita kept her voice pleasant, and her words were genuine. Even though a bit of her did feel like it was a useless act, another toe over the line she didn't need to cross. Perhaps Venkat hadn't rubbed off on her quite as well as she'd thought.

(This post was last modified: Mar 19, 2021, 06:56 PM by Sita.)

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Sita had self restraint whilst Marian most certainly did not. Maybe it made the woman better than her, all dignified and poised to try and fix shit but from where Marian sat it didn't seem like an earnest effort. She was doing this to make herself feel better and that was a pretty selfish and shitty thing to do, all because she wanted to maintain her moral high ground. Marian let out a snort, undignified and hoggish. If she was here to make amends then tough shit, the Selwyn-Tainn just wasn't interested. No use in fixing what Marian had thrown away.

"No you don't gotta do that." She explained her tone dry, as though the matter was old news, deader than some stringy remains of a kill even scavengers didn't feel like picking at. "I ain't with your group no more so we don't gotta play nice. I'll think you're a conniving bitch in my corner of the world and you can think whatever you like in yours. Capiche?"

Again, no surprise. Still Sita cocked her head as Marian spoke, and then frowned. She let the words hang in the wet, tumultuous air for long moment. If they were going to stay in their own little corners, fine. Sita would leave her be. The woman got her feet and gave a hefty shake of her coat. It was pointless since the rain kept coming down, but it made her fur itch not to do it.

She gave Marian a long look. "Isn't it tiring to be so angry all the time?" She asked, curious. Who was the girl who had so much hate in her heart? Fine. Sita pitied her, pitied Azra for taking fire from Sita's mistake, and pitied herself for disrupting their lives. But the feelings would sit in her mind for a moment before they floated away, because if she spent too much time lingering on something it would drag her out to sea.

There were somethings that kept her in the deep end, but at least she felt anchored there.

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Oh so she was done being apologetic? Marian would have thanked her stars but Sita was quick to flick to another direction, one that left a sour taste in Marian's mouth. She couldn't have been that much older than here but there she was, acting all world wise and sure as though she knew everything. As if she knew jackshit about Marian. The Selwyn-Tainn raised a back paw to itch behind her ear. She was pissed off, that she could not deny, but Marian liked to think the pity party narrative Sita had strung together was the furthest from the truth. She had every right to feel angry in this moment and in denying her Sita was just making herself out to be even more of a cunty-Mc-cunt face.

"Well now you mention it, I didn't feel all that bad till you showed your ugly mug." She could take that as she would, whether referring to their first initial meeting or just today. Honestly though it was a bit of both. So she liked to think. "But I gotta ask, isn't it tiring to have no self restraint at all? How do you get anything done? Maybe that's why you lost your kids. Hope it works out better this time if it comes down to that."

Two could play at the accusation game.

(This post was last modified: Mar 19, 2021, 07:27 PM by Marian.)

Sita deeply doubted that. Marian had been angry since they'd met and Sita had done almost nothing to provoke her, except maybe just exist. Azra had offered to help. Sita hadn't forced him into anything. But she dabbed a thought on Marian's words. They weren't entirely wrong and Sita gave a little shrug. She had been a bit too free, and she'd admitted as much to herself on the way here. Even in this moment, she silently hoped that she might not bring Azra's pups into the world. But if she did, she'd love them. She would not resent them. Because they were innocent.

"I've made mistakes. But I lost my children because the humans took them. With any luck, I'll find them soon. I hope you find someone, too, Marian." Sita cleared her throat and began to trot away.

(This post was last modified: Mar 19, 2021, 07:40 PM by Sita.)

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Whether Marian's words cut deep or not she couldn't tell. She'd made her point and Sita finally seemed to take the hint, to see the flag she'd been waving around so blatantly that even a blind wolf would notice. Seemingly intent on putting in the last word Sita tried once last jab, pointing out that she was all alone now and yadda yadda. Sure, she had no one and her sister was fuck knows where but Marian wasn't a simpering bitch who needed looking after. She'd deal with her baggage and move on as she always did, in a few days time Azra would just be the name of some guy she used to know. That list was longer than she cared to remember.

"Bye bitch." Marian muttered under her breath, taking a moment to savour the pitter patter of rain against her pelt. It itched the scratch a little and that was better than stooping to the alternative.

It hadn't been the meeting she'd really wanted, but Sita supposed she was glad enough that it hadn't come to blows. She wasn't interested in fighting, injuring Marian or herself when they were both unaligned in this place. And she certainly didn't want to come across her children looking an absolute mess. And Marian had left her thoughtful, knowing full well she would absolutely not making another misstep. She would just keep telling herself this. But her tail was down, flicking against her ankles as she found shelter again in the trees, back to Walleye, hopefully to her children, and perhaps Azra, as well.

currently travelling with walleye