The hope that she would soon see @
Kjors trotting into the meeting circle morphed into a cold, sinking feeling as Kisla rushed to begin the meeting. The Baranski princess craned her neck this way and that, cloudy eyes searching for some sign of her swarthy protector. Kisla wouldn’t begin a meeting without her adviser… Karina’s heart leaped as her eye caught a flurry of movement, but it was only @
Atropos arriving late-- though in Atropos’s defense, she hadn’t arrived late so much as the meeting was begun early. The young mother’s tongue lapped over the top of her adoptive daughter’s head in greeting.
It was soon evident why Kisla had been in such a rush. If they had waiting for Atropos’s arrival, wolves would have certainly begun noticing the absence of Kjors. They would have whispered, and conjectured. And if there was one thing her mother didn’t like, it was for wolves to have their own ideas and opinions… that had been obvious from the very first pack meeting Karina had attended. They had all been expected to just accept the decisions of the alphas, always, with no opportunity for discussion. Karina couldn’t even recall a meeting when her parents had
ever solicited opinions or advice from the pack as a whole. Meetings were held so that the pack could be informed of decisions that had already been made behind closed doors. And they were all expected to just be okay with that, every single time. Well, not anymore.
Not anymore.
Had Karina been younger and stupider, she would have spoken up, like she had in so many pack meetings before. Of course, she knew from making this mistake over and over that her words held no sway over the alphas in a meeting such as this.
Meeting was not really a good word to describe these gatherings; that word implies that everyone would be contributing. The River alphas did not hold meetings—they merely made announcements.
Karina nodded to her children who looked to her for confirmation, the motion feeling mechanical.
“We are rocks,” she whispered to @
Bennet in reminder. Karina herself had never felt more like a cold, hard stone in her entire life. Unspoken and unacted upon, her hot anger had frozen in her chest, leaving her feeling heavy and numb. Maybe this was why @
Kisla was always so emotionless.. so cold. She had stuffed her emotions so many times that all her insides were frozen hard, and no amount of warmth could melt them.
If Karina’s packmates were expecting her usual outburst, they were to be disappointed. Kisla’s decision had been made, and there was nothing Karina could say that would help. Karina’s decision had been made as well, and there was nothing Kisla could say to her that would help. To say this this was the straw that broke the camel’s back would be a gross understatement. This was the pile of boulders that buried the camel in a massive landslide-- the camel which had already been carrying quite a lot of straw! Karina was royalty, she was a Baranski—a princess! No.. scratch that. She was a Sorenson—a queen. She would not stand to be part of a pack that needed to contrive ridiculous excuses (he “took advantage of the River’s mourning,” what did that even mean?!) to pluck out a hair that wouldn’t lay completely flat. A pack that cast a loyal member aside like garbage, when he was only doing what was best for his family (the River of course did not know of Kjors’s motivation to better provide for Bennet, but Karina was beyond caring at this point). Weren’t they all supposed to be family?
All that talk of Hearthwood River being a family—it was all bullshit. Just another manipulation to get everyone to fall in line: we’re family, we all love each other,
so do what I say. The Baranskis were a family; that was true enough—Karina had bent, broken and stomped on pack law time and time again, and she was never penalized. And yet, Kjors puts one toe out of line here or there—e.g. his challenge for leadership is arbitrarily considered a moon or so too early-- and he’s gone. Out. Like he was never family to begin with. Now that was hypocrisy at its finest right there, and it was enough to make Karina wanted to turn to @
Lilya and scream, “G
et out while you can!” She did no such thing though; Lilya would just have to realize for herself how little she meant to the alphas, especially when compared to their own flesh and blood families. It pained Karina that she could not speak to Lilya and warn her, since as a Priestess she was committed to acting tin the best interest of all the Mother’s children. It was just one more item added to the long list of treasonous actions in Hearthwood River that were in actuality, the right thing to do. No longer would Karina have to choose between doing the right thing, and doing what her parents say. She would make no more choices between spreading Goodness and the evil of inaction. Not anymore.
Not anymore.