Lenae didn't feel any different, if anything she welcomed the return to normality- or at least her version of it. But that in itself was supposed to be troubling, right? She couldn't quite wrap her head around it, that the lack of stink was a sign of things to come. Shock hadn't settled in yet, that would come later, as of then she was in denial, of sorts. There was no use in refusing to acknowledge the past,what was done was done. Even if in hindsight it clearly wasn't a clever move, she had enjoyed her time with Odin. He was good company and like the other wolves that gathered here, he made her feel safe.

Piety and Lorcan had insisted that something was amiss- for lack of a better word, rather Lenae didn't want to think of it- but...they had to be wrong. Not out of maliciousness but- somehow this all had to be a misunderstanding. Mother nature wasn't perfect, mistakes happened from time to time, surely the absence of her smell was one of them. Nothing more and nothing less.

Thinking of it that way made the shame, the embarrassment easier to swallow. They knew of her moment of weakness, it was laid bare for all to smell and she- Lenae didn't want to think of it, the sooner this was all brushed under the carpet the better.

Pushing herself up onto her feet, Lenae shook off her coat and padded along, heading west of the den. She had been idle for too long, it was about time she tried to pull her weight. Perhaps this issue would resolve itself, then everyone would stoop looking at her as though a bird had pooped on her face or something. But what if...what if it didn't? What if it got worse, or they were right? A whine pushed up against her sealed lips, what would she do then? Oh God- what if-

Lenae shook her head and forced a smile. She was better, things were getting better, there was no use in spoiling it all.

Lenae didn't even need to think of a response before one slipped loose from her lips.

"It's Lenae."She corrected, gently, with not a hint of malice or resentment. "I'm using my real name now-Everly... was my sister. You would have liked her, she was very clever, had such a good way with words." And she was rambling again, she could have spoken about her sister for an eternity if her lifespan allowed. Alas..."But I'm fine, thank you. Why do you ask?"

It was funny, almost. How eager she was to remain ignorant, blissfully unaware of what she had gotten herself into. Not so long ago she had yearned to change, wanted to be anything but the old Lenae, yet here she was, clinging onto old habits like a safety blanket.

Lenae liked to think she grown at least a  little, that she had shed her less desirable traits like a winter coat but really... who was she kidding? She had rushed headfirst into Odin's company with next to no thought, all those worries about sin and resisting the temptation had all flown out of the window. And she hadn't even staved them off for long, a couple of  weeks at most! She was still an airhead, wasn't she? Just as she'd been told all those years ago. Lenae had never been as sharp or as clever as her siblings and now.... for all she knew she was paying the price for her insolence and foolishness.

"I was thinking about doing something, helping out." She admitted, her slight shoulders moving up and down in a tired shrug.

Lenae should have seen it coming but it hurt nonetheless. Cheedo meant well but it didn't make the pain any easier to deal with. Her smile turned tight, like a taut harp string as she shook her head.

"Everly isn't...with us anymore." That was the lightest way she could think of putting it. Gently, nothing like the end her sister most likely met.

Cheeo's next line of words weren't any nicer, a frown yanked at Lenae's features as her brows drew together. That was- She swallowed thickly as she dismissed her words with a swish of her tail. She didn't want to think of that, especially since it couldn't be true.

Of course, Lenae didn't blame Cheedo for thinking like that, it was an easy conclusion to come to, considering how she smelled-or didn't smell- but it just wasn't the case. Lenae couldn't be with pups-not because she didn't know how the process worked (ish)- but because someone as broken and as wretched as her just wasn't capable of that sort of thing. Last season proved that.

Still, it was hard to put into words. Lenae didn't want to say that Cheedo was wrong, that would be so rude, so she pursed her lips as she wriggled her nose, almost like a bunny.

"I...Anyway, I was thinking of maybe seeing if there were any borrows around. I'm not very good at hunting big things, but I'm fast- maybe not as before, but it's worth a shot, right?" It was rude to gloss over the topic like that but she couldn't think of anything to say! She hoped Cheedo wasn't too offended.

Lenae didn't understand. It was as though someone had flicked a switch inside Cheedo's brain, one moment she had been kind and sincere the next it looked as though- Lenae didn't recognise her anymore. Resentment gleamed in Cheedo's eyes as a growl rumbled from the base of her throat. Instinctively Lenae took a step back and then another till she almost tripped over her own paws in her haste to get away.

Lenae was well aware of how changeable people could be, that they could all be smiles and sunshine one moment then the next they were anything but kind, cruel even. Lenae couldn't even hear the care in her words anymore, all she felt was bitterness and rage- emotions that would make her shrink away even on her best days. What she didn't understand though was why she was doing this, why she thought snarling and snapping would help. Lenae had thought... she'd trusted Cheedo with all she had, considered her one of her closest friends, family, she'd never thought that Cheedo could be like this, could be so terrifying.

Lenae shook her head so fast her vision span. She couldn't even hear Cheedo's venomous words, her ears were pinned so tight against her skull all she heard was the racing of her pulse, the increasingly panicked voice in her mind telling her to run and never look back. She just needed this to end, for Cheedo to stop, for things to go back to the way they were. But clearly it was too late, Cheedo hated her, feelings like that didn't just go away, even after the dust settled. Things would never be the same again.

"I can't." She whimpered, her whole form shaking and trembling as she kept backpedalling. "Please don't."

No soft words or pleases were going to turn this situation around. It was scary how changeable Cheedo was, how she could go from zero to one hundred in a second. Yes, maybe she was just trying to help, maybe her intentions were good but as things were it didn't like she was being helped. If anything, it was an attack, each 'kind' word was a blow, hit after hit till Lenae could take no more.

Her throat felt tight, her airways constricted, as her legs wobbled, threatening to collapse beneath her weight. It didn't even register in her mind that Cheedo was upset or that she was even crying- there were few if any solid thoughts roaming around in Lenae's mind. There was nothing but panic, rising and rising till she felt bile in the back of her mouth, till her heart hurt as it thundered in her chest, beating against her ribs as though it wanted to break free. She was cold, shivering so violently she felt faint. Just a little at first but oh...her paws were going numb, it started at the tips of her toes and coiled around her paws till it felt as though she was walking on air.

Help. Lenae looked up slowly, as a brief flicker of confusion tried to shove its way through the crowd of 'no no nos' in her mind. She took a step back and then another, wheezing as air became increasingly difficult to come by. She needed- she just needed...Lenae didn't know, it was hard to articulate so Lenae did the only thing she could: she ran.