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+---- Thread: Round Stone Crest i see now that i won't let go (/showthread.php?tid=9483)
RE: i see now that i won't let go - Raela - Jun 02, 2015
OOC: First 1000 word post! :D
Count: 1031
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The air around them seemed to soften; the previous tension and electricity was dissipating as they settled down on their haunches. She was grateful to see Gent drinking in her speech with interest; and perhaps even some gratitude of his own. It seemed to be smooth-going, this talking with him. It served to keep Raela speaking until she was satisfied that he could see all her thoughts on the situation. There was only a brief pause between the ruddy-pelted girl's final words and her burly companion's response. ”I don't trust Astraeus.” The admission folded her ears back in disappointment. The woman couldn't say she was surprised, but she had hoped to unite the two on their last excursion. It was beginning to feel like the two men wanted to be rivals. She knew it was hard not to get bitter with one another when both parties desired the same thing. This was no friendly competition either; this was for the crown. Astraeus stood the best chance of knocking Gent from his throne, but the others could easily pose just as much of a threat to the large male; especially if they ganged up on him. Was that a serious possibility? Did he have to fear from assassination or a coup? It was these things she mulled over while Gent paused. They must have been troubling him as well. The calm air began to calcify yet again, thickening as her friend made his concerns very, very clear. Raela's ears remained back, her eyes fixating for a moment on his own at the idea that Aeus 'owned' her. Quickly she looked away, mild shock and confusion blanking her expression as his voice rumbled on; growing more and more tense with each passing syllable. It was a storm of compounding waves in her head; replies forming and changing with no space in his speech for her to let them out. Without warning, the conversation passed irreversibly into the eye of the storm. ”I can't do this without you.” Bewildered sunshine eyes crept upward again, finding their familiar resting place in his chilled pools. Every inch of him was soaked with sincerity. ”You're the light I need Raela.” Breath trapped itself in her lungs in a silent gasp, her jaws parted only slightly in wonder. Her previous worries about his temper, his darker side came forward again, but this time Gent was admitting their legitimacy. He knew about this part of him, whether he wanted to tell her about it before or not. Images of his frightening, rage fueled form towering over her as she defended Kajika flickered through her mind's eye. The contrast between that and his somber blue eyes was striking. Was she the reason? It was certainly implied. Her bones felt like they were growing cold but fire burned from oxter to oxter; wrapping around her chest almost restrictively. This was how it had been with Tolas; the sweet little girl who melted her brother's cold heart so they both could survive. It was a glowing warmth that calmed her demeanor and informed the girl's thoughts now. “Gent...” Her soft voice was part confusion and part sympathy. There was no fiber of her being that could leave anyone behind who wanted her around so badly; needed her. She stepped forward; watching his worried face for a few moments more before the words finally formed on her tongue. It was a more serious tone that carried her message. “I wouldn't dream of taking Minka's pack from her, or from Kova and the others if they wanted it.” Truly she hadn't thought of what would happen if Astraeus assumed the throne. Really either of them seemed like a temporary solution until the prince or his little siblings could take over. “I never imagined Aeus as stealing the pack from her, just filling in as Alpha. I don't know if that's what his plan is...” The woman made a mental note to speak with him soon after this meeting; there were some things that needed clearing up. Gent obviously didn't mean to oust the matriarch though. “No one's going to take me anywhere Gent. I would only leave if I wanted to, and right now I don't. I can't say anything for sure, but I know don't want to be an Alpha or a loner – and that leaves pups out of the picture for me.” Her declaration was serious and somber; it was a fact she had to face. Minka would never allow her to have children so long as she lived here. The girl sighed. “Minka and Tokino probably saved my life by taking me in. You didn't see how bad a shape I was in. Eight months Gent. Alone. It hurt just to stand.” Her eyebrows drew up to emphasize the severity of the woman's predicament. She hadn't told Gent of her past before, but now was a good a time as any and she trusted him. He needed to know why she wanted to stay. Rae folded her head downward, tucking her chin protectively against her chest and closing her eyes as her words made her more and more vulnerable. “My pack kicked me out. Minka was the first one not to chase me from her borders. Even in winter with her children missing she accepted me; malnourished and weak; nearly useless to her until my strength returned.” She turned her gaze away, glaring holes through the earth and digging out the events tucked away in her memory. “It was the first place that ever felt like what home is supposed to be.” The woman paused, eyebrows drawing together with conviction as she met his once more. Minka was the only reason she knew what home was supposed to be. Tolas could never have given her that in that mess of a family. It was all becoming clear to her now. “I owe her Gent. I could never take her place and I can't leave her.” There, it was done. She had sworn allegiance to this pack and a Crest wolf she would be until the Laginas' era was over. It was only fair. She could not forsake this sanctuary. Not ever.Image © Chris Smith Photography Manipulation © Jenandra |
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RE: i see now that i won't let go - Gent - Jun 04, 2015
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Gent watched her features with desperate precision, trying his damndest not to let any more emotion leak into his celestite eyes or crease his countenance. He'd been weakened before by her presence, but the confession he'd just uttered was absolutely unacceptable. His mind reeled as it awaited her response, unable to fully comprehend his own stupidity in allowing his shell to crack so far open as to allow something like that to sneak out. And since when did he house emotion this deep anyways? He needed her? Worse than saying it, was the fact of how purely sincere it had been. Horrified, the Lieris heir realized that he'd dug himself into a hole he could not escape. He should never have needed anyone.
She stepped forward, and without thinking, his body instinctively moved back the same distance as she had advanced. Something almost like fear had him in its grips now, and refused to let go until Raela chased it away. She spoke his name beautifully, but immediately after allowed silence to overcome them once again, and his anxiety remained in control. Even when she did resume speaking, her claim was empty of any sort of comfort for he already knew she wouldn't allow Astraeus to do such a thing. It was Taranath that he was mistrusting of, and him alone; Raela had earned every ounce of Gent's confidence by now.
It wasn't until she veered into the story of her arrival to Black Thorn Downs that his muscles and nerves both began to relax, as the man was both keenly interested in learning more about the woman and aware that this was an extension of her own trust unto him to share one of the darker moments of her past. His eyes abated their guard, thawing with each word she gifted to him. When her story seemed to quickly wrap up, he was left with other questions to float to the top amongst all the froth of the rest. While they involved something that had clearly harmed Raela emotionally if not physically, they were still much more calming to focus on than the rest that were pressing against the insides of his skull. Still, he would be forced to sit on them, returning to the topic at a later appropriate conversation.
Her final pause was birthed then, but he could not know it as that, and wondered if perhaps she was finished, leaving him to infer that this was meant to be further evidence of her loyalty to Minka. However, after a moment of that quite awful silence, her jaws parted once again, and his ears grew rigid atop his head, pressed as far forward as the muscles would allow to catch every single utterance.
It was a vow, far closer to what he had wanted her to say in response to all of his questions than he would have ever realistically expected to get. Now that he had it, his anxiety finally ebbed away in full, but there was no rejoicing nor even relief. Instead, her words left him feeling oddly empty. She had just sacrificed her future to pay a debt that they both knew Minka would have never held her to. It was what he wanted, for her to dedicate herself to this pack, and this pack alone. It would not do to be neighbors for the man, he wanted her at his side at any moment's notice. He wanted her as his advisor for as long as he reigned, and more importantly he needed her close friendship. And yet, he found himself mentally taking note; if she were to ever change her mind, he would not call her a liar, would not consider it a betrayal. Only for her.
He stood and stepped forward then, not once to recover what Raela had intended to gain but twice, then thrice, until his forehead rested flush against her own. The shield within his eyes was now completely abandoned, and within them mixed a wealth of emotion, but most dominant was care. He hoped they could convey for him what he couldn't through words, what he couldn't even fully formulate through thought. Whatever happened, despite what he most wanted, he was at her side; he was her friend.