Poison Path confident in my insecurity

When she had hit him in the chest he had not expected her to be affected it seemed more than he had been by the hit. Though she seemed to have recovered enough to throw him a comment about it not being good. “The result might not have been the best,” he stated, “But the idea of the action was a good one not to mention the execution. I wasn’t expecting you some at me where you did. Being able to fake you opponent out would work in your favor and allow you to get in a hit that you might not otherwise have been able to accomplish.” Fighting in Kajika’s mind was about so much more than hits and misses, it was thinking about the next move and retaliation to whatever your opponent did.

Then it was his turn to go at her and see if she could figure out what would be her best move in whatever situation that he was going to put her in. That happened to be him going for her hind legs and taking them out from under her which would take her off her feet and put her in a vulnerable position. She seemed to have chosen a position of staying put and making herself smaller to take whatever he was going to do. His plan had worked and once he’d hit her she’d toppled to her side.

He flinched slightly as he watched her hit the ground and her yelp tore at him since he did not want to be the one to cause her to make those sounds. This was training though and he knew that so he could not coddle her like he wanted to. Instead he settled for an, “Are you alright?” Then she had had concerns which he listened to and he gave her a nod. “It is true that you are a lot smaller than other wolves in this forest but that also gives you an advantage. You have speed on your side and sometimes it is better to avoid a hit. Not to mention you can make a hit and get out of the way before your opponent has time to react. Should we try again? Your turn to come at me.”

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RE: confident in my insecurity - Desideria - Jun 05, 2015

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Hmm. Faking an opponent out was not something Des had considered before. It made sense, now that someone had brought it up. Small and sly, that was often how she preformed tasks assigned to her by prior packs – and how she carved out a living when she was on her own. Never let the others own to what she was thinking, it was much easier to pull off a successful caper when she was under the radar. Perhaps she would have a touch more success with a skirmish if she wasn't so obvious in what she was trying to do.

Of course, thinking fast would probably benefit her even more. If asked, the woman probably couldn't explain why she'd frozen up when her friend charged at her. Taking a moment to get her balance out, she shook out her tawny pelt vigorously before shifting an ear, indicated she wasn't injured. Kajika went on to explain something she already understood – strength definitely wasn't her strongest suit. Instead, she was fitted for speed, something she'd previously used to escape any measure of bodily harm. Using it in a scuffle hadn't been considered, but maybe her friend had a point. Instead of trying to barrel other wolves other, she could pick and bite at important bits. Perhaps she'd get no critical hits, but she'd avoid harm and wear another down.

Humming to herself, the timber wolf gave a short nod. "Yes, we need to try again. I gotta get this right." She needed to be able to take care of herself, and if, ancestors forbid, she needed to be able to take care of the puppies, if the situation every arose. Desideria had no desire to be any sort of guardian, but the heirs were more valuable than herself, and it was something the woman instinctually understood. Steeling her nerves, the female didn't announce herself before darting forward. This time, she lunged for Kajika. Arching her head, she tried to strike his chin and perhaps stun him a little.

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RE: confident in my insecurity - Kajika - Jun 06, 2015

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As he spoke Kajika hoped that he was passing information on to her that would keep her from getting hurt too badly. Though he knew that in a fight it wasn't possible to completely avoid getting injured. He also hoped that she wouldn't freeze up in a real fight and get seriously injured. He was glad that he was at least able to come back and give her the advice that he could and even if he could stay he could not fight her fights for her. The rest would be up to her and if she used her speed and determination he had confidence that she would be okay.

After he had knocked her off her feet he had been worried that he might have hurt her but she assured him she was okay. He was glad for that since hurting her was the last thing he wanted to do. Her quick recovery was something that would serve her well in the future if she did end up in a fight. He also hoped that she was learning to play to her strengths which was what he was trying to explain to her as he spoke about her using her speed. It would serve her better than trying to match a much larger wolf's strength. She was smart and he knew she would be able to figure out what would work best for her.

Yet again she proved her determination when she agreed they needed to go again. He didn't have time to say anything in response because she was coming at him. She had chosen the tactic of speed and surprise to land a hit on his chin that not only caught him by surprise but knocked him back on to his haunches. It took him a moment to regain his bearings. With a shake of his head he was back on his feet, "Your learning. That was good, I wasn't expecting that." Since she wanted to play the game of surprise he didn't tell her when he was going to strike. Instead he was on his feet lunging in her direction once more. This time he was going to use his bulk to push her to the ground.

[/dohtml]~Table by Ace

RE: confident in my insecurity - Desideria - Jun 07, 2015

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Sprinting forward, the female did not give herself the opportunity to self-doubt. One moment she was discussing tactics with Kajika, and in the next breath she bolted towards her friend. With her target more firmly in mind, she moved like missile programmed only for success. As she lifted up, her crown cracked against the male's chin. It sent a dizzying shock through her as she bounced back down on her fore paws, already moving away. Even if it had rattled her a bit, staying still had already proven to be the wrong idea. Only once out of the loner's reach, she turned, and that was when she realized she'd actually toppled the large male backwards.

For a moment, Desideria paused, eyes wide as she realized she'd done that. It wasn't through sheer force or strength, but accomplished through quick thinking and agile feet. Something warm bubbled up in her chest, but her newfound sense of delight was short-lived. Once the earthy male had righted himself, he offered but one note before he turned her own tactic back on her. This time, she didn't freeze. Lowering herself closer to the ground, Des waited another breath before springing to the right, into the nightshade surrounding the path they'd begun to spar on. He'd aimed for her legs last time, so the woman was careful to make them a more difficult target.

Instead of waiting for Kajika to instruct her, the woman made the decision to retaliate. That was how it would work in the real world, she reckoned, that was how she'd be expected to behave it a packmate or stranger threatened her position or well-being. Darting towards the vagrant's side, she moved to shove her shoulder towards middle, as if to push him down and away. But she didn't stop there, opening her mouth to grab at his hind leg and pull it out from under him. It'd worked on her, hadn't it?

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RE: confident in my insecurity - Kajika - Jun 08, 2015

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The move that Des had successfully accomplished against him was not only surprise but had also knocked him off balance and disoriented him for a moment. Still with a shake he was able to recover so that he would be able to retaliate in the face of whatever else she might decide to throw at him. He did however think that it was a clever move, if it had been able to disorient him then it would probably work on others that were similar to her size which could give her the time to get the upper hand. However once he had regained his senses he didn’t give her any time to think about what she was going to do next because he had taken a cue from her and retaliated back in an effort to knock her to the ground.

His effort was in vain though, she had prepared herself and then retaliated by springing out of his path just in time for him to not expect that from her considering the last time he had come at her. To which Kajika responded by putting on the brakes and spinning around amongst the nightshade plants that surrounded them and kicking some of them up along with some dirt in the process. Since they were sparring at a much faster pace Kajika prepared himself for her next move against him. This time he was expecting her to come right at him and he prepared to take the hit in his middle so that he would not be taken off balance again. She, however at the last moment had grabbed at his hind leg which he was only aware of when he felt her teeth clamp around it.

Kajika fell to his side amongst the nightshade, she was getting very good at her skills. Her speed was something that he had to get used to. Something that he was finding was that she liked to wait to the last minute to make a move that would work in her favor, something that he thought was going very well for her. “I’ll get you for that,” he said playfully as he sprung up from his position on the ground and pounced in her direction at the same time grabbing for the ruff of her neck to pull her to the ground.

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RE: confident in my insecurity - Desideria - Jun 09, 2015

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It was working. It was working. With a spark of glee, the female felt her teeth connect. As she surged forward, the weight around her shifted, and for the second time, her opponent lost his battle with gravity. Even with the joy of success fluttering in her ribcage, she skittered away, not wishing to give the loner the choice to take her down alongside him. If he were a real enemy, it could be the difference between life and death. It could be the difference between harm and health. Desideria was a great many things, very much including a coward, and the idea of grievous injury absolutely shook her to her core.

War-torn ear swept to the side, and a familiar voice was enough to remind the wannabe scout that this was a friendly scuffle. It was a training match, and it was no serious matter. Between allies, no harm would befall her. Spinning around on her haunches, she found Kajika was much quicker to get on his feet this time. No longer taken by complete surprise, he coiled back and unloaded like a spring wound too tight. The few steps she managed to shuffle backwards did not put enough distance between the two. Her ruff was snagged by the larger wolf, his weight and velocity overpowered the female. She went down in a tangle of limbs and wide eyes, struggling violently the entire way.

Crashing into the earth did not pry a yelp free this time, but only a determined grunt. Using her momentum to roll, she tried to tear her ruff away from her friend, tail thrashing as she tried to curl her legs beneath me. "I'm a quick study," she panted. "Mum always said, fight or die."

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RE: confident in my insecurity - Kajika - Jun 10, 2015

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It was twice that she had been able to knock him off his feet and he was feeling as though he was not taking his advice to her quite as seriously as perhaps he should. This of course as all fun, training for her and to him it was more important for her to learn the lesson’s than it was for him to get them. He wanted to be able to leave her with confidence that she would be alright in his absence. That goal did not seem as far off as it might have seemed when they first started. It seemed she had a hidden natural talent for this sort of thing of course the real test would be in a real fight but he hoped that it wouldn’t come to that.

He let her know that she would pay for that last time, he was joking of course, but he did find a way to get her to the ground since his last plan had not quite worked out for him. Brute strength, he had used his size against her which was something that he also felt she would have to have experience with since so many wolves of this place were his size. This time he had grabbed the ruff of fur around her neck to pull her down, and she had gone down. He could feel her struggles against him but he did not let her go until he was sure that she wouldn’t recovery her feet too quickly. He had also fallen with her his legs flailing as they tumbled.

Finally he let go of her scruff and rolled away from her to regain his footing, “Yes you are and you’re doing very well,” he agreed to her comment about being a quick study, “You might do better in a fight because of it.” If she had the time to really pay attention to what her opponent was doing she turn their tactics back on them. “She may not have been right about the stealing but she was right about that,” he stated when Des told him that her mother said. “Sometimes it feels like that is all life is,” he added. At least the life that he led seemed that way a lot of the time.

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RE: confident in my insecurity - Desideria - Jun 13, 2015

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Finally, they'd come to a brief pause in their skirmish. Once allowed to get to her feet, the petite female gathered her limbs beneath her lithe frame and pushed herself away from the earth. The adrenaline was still coursing through her veins, leaving the timber wolf shifting her weight impatiently as she shook out any dusty from her pale, earthy coat. Behind her, Desideria's tail continued to wag despite the momentary interlude in their training session. Her sides fluttered in quick, intermittent breaths, and she tipped her head to one side, allowing her friend's final statement to sink in for a moment.

"I don't want that," she finally hummed, body stilling as she fixed Kajika with a thoughtful stare. "I spent two years running, after we all got separated. It's exhausting, running. And it ain't fun, either. I just…I dunno, want to live."

And that, Desideria thought with more conviction than was typical for the rogue, is why I need to establish my place in this pack. While the other subordinates mattered little to her, she could consider the same sex alpha her friend, and that was a metric ton more than she'd had in any other group her entire life. Even her own dam could not be considered an ally or companion – as soon as she was feasible able to dump her offspring, she did. It was a cruel world out there, the thief knew, and all she wanted was one little piece of it.

"…you might…I dunno. Consider pack life, Kaj, you know? Less fighting. More living. It's not a bad life, working with Namid."

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RE: confident in my insecurity - Kajika - Jun 14, 2015

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After their last tussle it seemed they both needed something of a rest in which Kajika pulled himself up onto his feet and giving his body a shake. His sides heaved slightly as he took a moment to catch his breath after offering Des a few words. He was ready for another go when she was but for now it seemed that his words might have struck something in her by what she spoke to him next. He reflected on her words a moment before speaking. “I about running. It is exhausting and at the end of the day all you want is to find a place to belong. All any of us wants is to live but to live you have to fight whether it is to survive or for what you believe in.” He also felt that it was important to know which battles to fight, picking the wrong ones could lead to a bad outcome.

Kajika had spent the better part of the last two years fighting for not only what he believed to be right but also for his survival. In his birth pack he had tried to fight against the changes that were taking place that he could not consciously accept and in this new place for his survival as a lone wolf. Together he thought that had made him stronger but at the same time had made him realize how important somethings were such as the friendship that he shared with Des. Without that he wasn’t sure what would have become of him after coming to Relic Lore.

He regarded her a moment after she spoke about considering pack life, “I have,” he told her, “A lot actually. It’s what I came here to find and I just want to make sure that I find the right place. I think working with Namid has done a lot for you and I am glad that you’re fitting in so well but I don’t know if it would be the right place. What do you think?” He asked curious of her opinion.

He knew she wanted him to stay in her pack with her and he wanted to but he had to be certain it was the right decision.

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RE: confident in my insecurity - Desideria - Jun 15, 2015

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Kajika did not shoot down her idea immediately, and something sparked in the woman's chest. After a moment, she inched forward, reaching out to brush her nose into her friend's ruff. "…yeah, yeah. I know. I know you gotta fight sometimes, but…just don't think that should be all life is. Surviving isn't living. Look what it did to my ma, you know? She dumped us as soon as she could." Her tail dropped behind her as she offered a one-shouldered shrug, ears flat. The sigh couldn't be withheld – even in hope, it was a hard thing to discuss. It was hard to understand. She hadn't even realized she'd have a choice in such a thing before joining Namid and Fallen Tree Cove, and for that, she felt terribly loyal to the Star Dancer.

Tipping her head, she considered her friend's query seriously. As much as she missed Kajika whenever he was gone, the scout in training did not wish to trap him in a place he wouldn't live. Leaving was worse than never being there in the first place.

"Well…I think it's the right place, for me. I've got no reason to think Namid would be bad to me…she's had the chance. Even if I I'm not…I dunno, best friends with everyone, Anthem has a strong work ethic, and so does his sister. It's a pack that wants to work together, you know? And we don't…hurt anyone, we take care of the puppies. I have something to work towards. It's right for me…but I guess, I'm not sure what's right for you? I can try to answer, though, if you know what you're looking for…"

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