Round Stone Crest Be Not Afraid

Kino followed along quietly, trying his best to skirt around things that made noise. The further out they went the more curious the boy became. What could they need to talk about that would take them so far from the communal den? Normally they would have all just gone back to sleep, so what made Calanthe’s little episode so bad? They all had bad dreams, she just needed a little hug like Minka did with them when they had bad dreams then she would be off to sleep again. He was so interested in thinking about what they could be going to talk about that he didn’t notice Kova sneaking up on him. His teeth made gentle contact with his tail, but it was enough to make the young boy jump. He clamped his mouth shut to keep from crying out, but he rounded hackles raised and eyes narrowed until he noticed it was his older sibling. Automatically his guard went down and he simply gave a sigh, having no ability to be angry with his second favorite sibling. “Hey, you scared me!” he whispered, almost as if scorning the older boy. His bright gaze turned as he noticed the other’s getting farther away and he became ansty. There was no way that Kova would just leave him alone, so he gave another huff. ”You can come…but be quiet. I just wanna see what’s going on,” the young prince stated, then promptly turned on his heel and began to follow again. He hurried a little more than previously in an attempt to catch up, squeezing around foliage and crisp looking leaves that might give him away. One might say he was…too…experienced with what he was doing.

It seemed that the group had stopped and he allowed himself to stop just behind a particularly thick bush. It would conceal his silver pelt nicely as the moonlight reflected off of it, giving him that trademark ghostly appearance. His ears went forward as they focused on the words, not taking the chance to peek around his hiding place at the risk of them seeing him. Gent’s voice spoke, cool and collected and Kino tilted his head. Why did he even need to ask that? It was quite obvious to him what the problem had been, and that there was no need for the man to ask it. It had simply been a nightmare. Calanthe then began to speak, voice low and a strong show of pleading in it. He frowned, brows pulling together at the tone of it. He didn’t need to see her to know that she was probably head-low to the ground in submission to the man. He understood now the ranks and a  bit of the protocol of how the pack worked, but he still had never had to submit to anyone in the pack. In fact, they all treated him with some form of respect. He looked over at Kova with confusion before turning back to attention at the event that was happening.

Delphi the Oracle, Designs.  

(This post was last modified: Oct 25, 2015, 02:46 AM by Sahalie. Edit Reason: fixed your table, white font was bleeding into the thread )

Her gestures of comfort seemed to elicit next to nothing from the tawny woman. Nevertheless Rae stuck closer to her side as they moved along, her ears being the first to register that they were being followed. For a moment she grew concerned; turning to scan the foliage as they walked, but the scents finally revealed the stalkers to be the two silver Crest princes; and her mind was put at ease. Kova wouldn't let anything bad happen to Kino, and they were all nearby just in case. Gent could not have been so oblivious to the boys, but he was evidently as satisfied with Kova's presence as she. With that matter pushed aside the King's attention landed squarely, and bluntly, on Calanthe.  Raela turned to face her; ears folded with concern. An apology immediately fired itself from her maw, followed by an explanation. The subordinate seemed to fade more and more as she went on, but Raela felt only pity for her. How could she be expected to quiet her fears all on her own? Raela knew better than to expect such a thing, and she was the next to speak up in swift succession, even lowering herself a bit closer to the troubled woman's level. “Cal, it's alright,” she soothed, her sunshine eyes passing over the female's tawny face. She didn't want to see this carry on like some sort of reprimand. “What is it that's bothering you?” Raela's head tipped to the side in confusion. “What did you see?” She had a guess as to what traumatic events were plaguing the woman in question, but it was always better to get confirmation. She could only help if she knew which particular insecurities and worries had to be pacified.  Image © Chris Smith Photography Manipulation © Jenandra

            

I don't want this to die so Ima post before @Calanthe

Kova made an amusing worried face as Kino turned slightly to answer him. “I'm pretty sure they don't want us following them.. Or up from bed at all for that matter. Especially you, your brother, and sister. It's way past your bed time.” Kova complained and was half tempted to use his muzzle to gingerly press on Kino to stop. However, he too was interested to hear what was going on with their pack mate. So he held back and trailed behind Kino quietly. To be truthful Kova was more worried about Kino getting into trouble and making noise than he was. The lads steps were barely a whisper upon the earth as Kova slid over the landscape behind Kino and kept his eyes on their surroundings.

Then he slowed to a stop where the bushes were too short for him to go any farther and stay hidden. Luckily he was close enough to see and hear Calanthe and Raela. Though Kova was worried that Kino would attempt to get closer since he was shorter and could hide in the shorter bushes. Keeping as still as he could, the young male watched Kino then looked over to Calanthe from his hiding spot in the bushes. He eagerly awaited the younger womans answer with baited breath.  

Calanthe's ears flattened against her head at Raela's question; how in the world could she answer something like that? Telling Raela what she saw, what she relived every night... she had to remember to do that. She had to bring herself back into the middle of it and admit that it was there, and in this darkness and cold the memory would burn her worse than it had when the fires first raged around her. She couldn't tell the agouti. She couldn't go back and see those fires while she was awake. This was the only time she was safe from them...

But... they deserved to know why she had screeched like that and woke everyone up. Didn't they? How could she keep Gent from kicking her out for being a nuisance if she didn't explain herself? But did she deserve to stay? If she was disturbing her pack mates when they needed their rest, wasn't she only going to bring the pack down with her by weakening them? But could she handle being out on her own again, with no one to stand beside her and talk to her and understand her, no one to teach her to defend herself and help her bring down bigger game than sickly rabbits? Could she bear to have no purpose but survival, no distraction at all from her memories but what she needed to do to keep herself alive day to day?

The confusion was almost as bad as the nightmares; she had to do something before it could make her even crazier, even if that something meant she was kicked out for already being crazy. Looking up at Raela rather than at the shadowy fugleman before her, the tawny woman finally said, "It's... only fire. I see the day everything..." She shuddered at the memory, ducking her head again and squeezing her eyes shut with a low whine. "It's only fire," she said again, this time sounding more like she was trying to convince herself.

"I'm sorry," she said again, glancing at the ground near Gent's feet. "I didn't mean to bother anyone. It was only fire. I can control this on my own... I just need..." Help? Hardly; how could anyone help her? They hadn't been there. They didn't know, and they couldn't because she couldn't bring herself to tell them. The worst part of the nightmares was the solitude, and how could she admit to being afraid of that even more than she was haunted by the fire? How could any of them understand how much worse it had been to be there, out in the darkness, a fugitive running from the nothingness behind her and expecting only more of the same ahead? They hadn't ever had everything they loved ripped away in one fell swoop, not like this - and if they had, they had been prepared and able to move forward in spite of it all. They could never understand her nightmares.

"I just... need more time," she finally whispered as despair began to eat at her. "It was only a little fire. I can fix it on my own..."

She was so utterly submissive, clearly expecting to receive a lashing, whether it be physical or verbal, from the king despite what he perceived to be his kindness. Agitation crisscrossed through his mind but he did not allow this emotion to permeate his features. Her response only made it all the worse, and with each word he became increasingly grateful that @Raela had accompanied them. Certainly she would have the words that he did not, could not, possess. Instead of fixing whatever the problem was, it seemed his new subordinate was breaking herself down further in an attempt to stifle it. Unacceptable; he would not allow Calanthe to punish herself any further for something such as this.

Yet as the conversation continued further with a prompt from his closest friend, the sandy woman only buried herself deeper within the glass protections, refusing to help them make progress in this matter. Her words brought about the memory of the day he had met her. 'There was a fire - we didn't have time...' The king sighed.

"You aren't in trouble," he declared, his tone indicating that he not only wanted to make this evident for Calanthe's sake, but also wanted her to stop her nerve-wracked apologies. "I need you to trust us and calm down. Take some breaths, shake off the pressure," the guidance traveled through softening tones as the man eased himself onto his stomach, forelimbs curling as he relaxed. "I've got all night. Let's just talk, okay?"

(This post was last modified: Oct 29, 2015, 05:21 AM by Gent.)

ooc: In the interest of avoiding another round of "please talk to us" (I think this would be round three of it? :P) I'm posting again. I'm going to work towards wrapping it up here; once everybody's posted after this, I will either post again or archive, so please don't archive if you're the last person to respond after this post.

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Gent's words rcoketed through her - "You're not in trouble." How could she not be in trouble? She woke everybody up! Woke up the pups - the Queen - even woke up Gent, of all people, of everyone she could have roused, the man who had been the first to take her in--!

And that man was telling her to calm down and talk to them. To tell them the truth, and all of it.

Calanthe lowered herself to the ground as Gent did, still trembling, still unwilling to hold herself at a higher position than her King, still entirely unable to look at him as she falteringly began to speak again: "It's... always the same nightmare. Always." A deep, shuddering breath. "I see the fire - only it's not just the forest, it's - the sky is black, and everything is burning, and if I try to call for anyone there's no answer but the fire roaring, and if I run it burns brighter and hotter..."

She stopped, ears flat against her head as she sat in silence for a long, long time. When she finally found her voice again, it was small and hollow and scarcely louder than a whisper. "And then there's... nothing. No one comes to find me. Nothing makes any sound. Nothing moves. It's just ashes and smoke... and me, all alone in the middle of it." The fur along her back spiked up as another tremor shook her frame.

"I was alone for so long," she whispered. "I stopped counting the days after the first... week, maybe. It was only me, and there was nothing left behind me to look for, nothing worth staying behind to wait for..." She finally raised her eyes to glance fleetingly up at her King's gaze before looking away again with another shudder. "I thought I was going to die out there..."