Leigh Glen You see Broken

Re: The stars are unusually bright tonight. Maybe because it's also unusually cold.. brr. 
Mild PP, please let me know if you want me to change it Zilas!

Dated for 1\3/17

@Aniashi

Sylva felt her thick coat fluffed up against the chill of the frigid night, Zilas was recovering well enough that they’d be able to start the trek home in a day or so. She had returned from a surprisingly successful hunt, the bloody remains of a snow hare left as a testament to that as she settled down near the dozing wolf. Worry filled the medic as she thought over her former packmates wounds, how had he come to have them? Who could have fought him so viciously? It was a mystery steeped in shadows for now.

Speaking of shadows, Sylva’s brown gaze blinked, there didn’t seem to be as many around, her muzzle drifted skyward, the stars were bright, shining like beacons in the massive river of blackness. She glanced toward Zilas before whispering “Oh ZIlas, what happened to you?” just loud enough, to if he wanted to reply he could, she wasn’t even sure if he was still asleep or not, she had left most of the hare for him so that he could recover more of the strength he had lost. Idly, her thoughts drifted toward White Fir Notch, and how the wolves that had known Zilas might react to his condition and reappearance.

ThoughtDialogue

The time spent at the glen with Sylva hurt more then the ghost could describe. She reminded them of everything the destroyed of everything they could never return to nor become again. However, the days passed by and they never even once tried to chase her away even IT did not seem to mind the presence of the onyx female.  She helped the, stayed with them even brought them food and they were great full for it. But they also knew that for every day they spent with her, the pain grew worse. Her scent a constant reminder of what they lost even if it was growing fainter from her absent from the Notch. They wanted to tell her to go back, to leave them alone but the thought of binge alone again kept them from it, a selfish wish that she stay a wish they new put her in more trouble by the day.

  The ghosts head were resting on the snowy ground eyes closed but not yet asleep. So they heard her question but for a few moment decided to ignore it. Then they opened their eyes looking up into the dark sky "our past caught up with us" they replied simply. "What we been running from for so long finally caught up" they tilted their head to look at her, their eyes oddly calm and yet tears were shimmering just faintly in the corner. "we should never have left Garmr, we should have died with him and Skadi. Should have perished with them for our crimes. Then he would have gotten his revenge and it would never be a risk to the Notch" they said quietly eyes still resting on Sylva.   

  

"Talking." IT.  

please don't judge me for talking to my self, after all, you were the one who ruined me.

Keala is permitted to enter any thread Zilas is part of regardless of the tag unless otherwise stated 

@Ainashi

The small wolf listened quietly to Zilas’s tale, she felt her heart tearing apart as he declared that he should have died long ago, a small spark of protectiveness coaxed a growl out of the medic’s throat as she gave a small shake of her head, her hazel brown gaze locking into Zilas’s  red. “No.” She said simply, pausing for a moment before going on. “You didn’t deserve to die, you don’t deserve to die and you're NOT going to die even if I have to drag your ass back from the brick every time you try.” The timber wolf’s tail lashed against the snow as she pressed her muzzle against the injured wolf’s uninjured shoulder, eventually she calmed down and decided to add more to it.

“Zilas, Life is something precious, we all die at some point, but you havn’t yet, the rivers have brought you back to us and I don’t want to see you squander that gift.” There was so much more that Sylva wanted to say, so many past events playing into this like a domino effect, but she couldn’t put those emotions into words just yet. “Zilas, I looked up to you back in Round Stone Crest, you were apart of the foundation that kept the pack together, you did things for @Gent that i don’t even know about, I’m sure you feel like you betrayed us when you left..but I don’t think you did, sometimes a rock is rugged and jagged around the edges, but one into a river, let it flow down with the current and over time it can change, become smooth and polished, Zilas, you just got out of the river.” She paused, some of her old self surfacing as a random giggle escaped “But don’t worry, i like you smooth or rugged, just don’t be a rock, some of them are very rude.”

ThoughtDialogue

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(This post was last modified: Feb 06, 2017, 09:17 PM by Sylva.)

Sorry for the wall of Zilas babbling

The growl wasn't anything they ever heard the small black medick make.  At least not towards any other wolf.  The sound oddly enough did not scare them not did it cause the usually fearful response they just looked at her blankly. Her protests went for deaf ears her gesture was not returned and he just started blankly out into the nothingness. Drag them back? the ghost looked at the dark Oddling with surprise written in their face. As she allowed her mouth to run labeling about rocks and streams It whispered in their mind Think she can save you what a fool IT teased them as it spoke causing them to growl faintly.

  Thier eyes grew cold and anger boiled in their chest as they spoke "Life isn't a gift, never have been. For how can our life, the life a runt of a man who saw us as nothing but a waste of space. He used as a chew toy and decoy. A man who would have sacrificed us with a second thought be a gift?!" they raged eyes locked on the dark wolf as they stood the movement quick and harsh causing pain to explode in their shoulder. "You would never understand you lived your life happily with some crazy family that thought you how to listen to the trees and talks to rocks! We did not our father would have killed us on the spot when we were born had our mother, his sister, not begged for our life. Don't you see or are you really this clueless? We are broken. We weren't good enough to stand by Garmr's side, and never good enough to enter the new world once Ragnarök have purified the current one and most certainly. We were never good enough to stand by the black king." They spoke lips pulled back into a snarl as they looked at her, there see you said it weak and useless IT laughed and he growled shouting "Shut up! just be quite and stop haunting us! before they collapsed on the ground staring emotionless at her tears rolling from their eyes.

  Zilas looked at her pain in his cold eyes as they whimpered, "don't you see? We are never good enough" mumbling on for a few minutes they rais their head to look at her eyes damp and red "we killed someone and left when we knew there were no turning back, and now they're gone dead. Had we stayed he would have used us as a decoy and escaped, he would have lived and we would have died like we were supposed to. Don't you see? For all these years we have been a dead wolf walking, our father would have killed us sooner or later and now even with him dead someone ells will want us dead..." they fell silent for a few seconds before repeating "we killed some one"   

   

"Talking." IT.  

(This post was last modified: Feb 07, 2017, 07:11 PM by Ainashi.)

please don't judge me for talking to my self, after all, you were the one who ruined me.

Keala is permitted to enter any thread Zilas is part of regardless of the tag unless otherwise stated 

There are several fresh rabbit tracks in the mud. Hunt Opportunity

She listened to Zilas’s words, visibly flitching at what he had said, claimed happened to her, oh how little he knew it was so far from the truth. She waited, biting her tongue as he went on, confessing that he had killed someone, that all this time he was nothing but an empty shell walking, deserving nothing but pain and death. When he told her to shut up, she flinched again, tears forming around her hazel gaze as the small wolf gave a shake of her head, his words stirring old memories, ones that had been buried deep within the girl’s psyche as a pup, abandoned and forgotten, but flooding forward now.

“That’s where you’re wrong, I didn’t have a happy family ZIlas, it was the opposite, You've seen people die, but have you ever watched the only two wolves who ever showed any love for you die in front of you, unable to help them while they withered and foamed? Your own father being bitten by your only friend as he tried to help him, the cold emotionless woman who you wanted to call mom, but you never truly could because she didn't see you as a daughter? But the runt of a litter where the only two she may have loved died so young? Siblings you never even met because they were too weak to survive, and yet you own mother who thrived on survival couldn’t see that YOU tried so hard to be what she wanted? And it never got you anything, nothing but her teaching you enough to survive before vanishing into the night?” she paused, shaking slightly as she looked directly at the white wolf, tears rolling down her cheeks “I became who I am because of it Zilas, you trying being a young girl thrown into the deep forest with no guidance, a constant consuming guilt that there is something you could have done to get her to stay, but no, the very wolf who gave me life left me because I was too weak for her standards, I didn’t have a happy family, I watched the only two who cared about me die.”

She stepped away from Zilas, shaking her tear stained muzzle at him “I do see Zilas, you see a broken soul, I see one mending, you see the scars from when you fell, I see the stories they're gonna tell, you see too far gone but I see...I see one who’s one step away from home.” She paused, taking a deep breath “Others may have abandoned you ZIlas..but I’m not, your not too far gone, you're not just damaged goods..I see something good in the making, Zilas, you only see your mistakes, but I see more...you might only see yourself through eyes of guilt, unworthy, undeserving..but I see you though more… I see you through eyes of mercy.”

ThoughtDialogue

(This post was last modified: Feb 09, 2017, 09:43 PM by Sylva.)

They hurt her, They hurt her, They hurt her. Yes, you hurt her 

   The ghost listened to her story surprise growing in their eyes. Her childhood was not what they had expected was not what they thought. But how? Back in Roundstone crest, she had been an odd one with a lot to learn but she always been a light, a beacon of happiness that walked around leaving a light laugh on every once lips. "We do" they answered eyes locked on hers as she spoke tears streaming from her eyes. "We to were the weak one as well, but our whole litter was a... mistake," they mumbled as she once again spoke and as she spilled her heart they wanted to curl up into a ball and sink into the ground. They wanted to just disappear, wishing for a second that Sylva had never found them so that they could not have caused her this pain. However, as she moved away they for a moment feel fear rise in their chest. Would she leave? They knew they deserved it, after what they just said pushing their problems onto her. But it appeared that she still had something to say.

   She talked and every word hurt like fire ripping through their flesh. Ravaging every inch of their binge. "home" they mumbled as she paused. Were they really just one step away from it? did she really believe they could return back to the Notch? "Mercy you say?" they asked her drying of their tears on their front legs before sitting up. "Sorry," they said eyes seeking to meet hers "We shouldn't have pushed it onto you" they hesitated for a moment before adding "You're a good wolf Sylva, sorry we hurt you." They said head bowing slightly while still seeking to hold her gaze. 

   

"Talking." IT.  

please don't judge me for talking to my self, after all, you were the one who ruined me.

Keala is permitted to enter any thread Zilas is part of regardless of the tag unless otherwise stated