Dead Empress Backwater and if you were drowned at sea

i'd give you my lungs so you could breathe

Backdated to 7/15, if that's cool with @Viorel.

After spending time with @Seri, Eros was ready now to tell his father what he'd found out while gone scouting. He wasn't entirely sure how Viorel would take to this news, rued having to announce yet another loss when his grief had already beaten him down so far. He had to know though, and maybe... maybe he'd even want to help Archer too.

"Hey Dad?" he called out, scenting the leader around and no one else. Perfect. They didn't need any of the family gossips overhearing and running their mouths. Eros was pretty sure he'd physically fight anyone who said his brother had deserved this amount of tragedy to befall his accidental family, except Viorel. If their Dad's heart was really as cold as Archer thought it, well, the young wolf had no idea how he would navigate that. In a way that allowed him to still keep both close, hopefully.

"I need to talk to you... It's... I've got some really shitty news. About Archer."

As much as he wanted to dress things up, he felt what was fairest was getting it all out as quickly as he could from the start, rather than drag out the discomfort.

(This post was last modified: Jul 21, 2023, 02:06 AM by Eros.)

Viorel had been by himself, staring up at the smoky sky and brooding, something he had been doing more and more often. He had been rejecting most company since the spring, with the exception of a few, and Eros being the most persistent in sticking by his side. The anger was slowly fading into guilt about how he had been acting and beneath it all a deep aching loneliness that he wasn’t ready to face yet. So he kept up his act of anger, even though he didn’t feel it as he had only a few weeks ago.

It was as if the smoke had taken the fire out of his soul, and let it wispy and smoggy like it had the air.

His lip twitched upwards when he recognized the scent of his son nearby, but he had long smothered it by the time Eros had reached him. It was definitely gone by the time the words were spoken. Turning sharply he asked, ”What happened?” His tone was a little harsher than he intended and Viorel forced himself to clear his throat and ask a little bit softer, ”Is he okay?” They may have fallen out, and Archer may have renounced all of them, but he still loved his son, he just wanted him to face the consequences of his actions.

Viorel responded with concern that Eros wished Archer could have seen himself, his confidence in their father bolstered. While it was nice to have his faith validated, it also tied his tongue all the more, now knowing what he was about to share was going to hurt. He swallowed, trying to surpass his hesitation quickly.

"He's, alive. He- they had two pups. And one, one got sick and died."

His voice broke around those final words, tears stinging peach eyes all over again.

"They never joined a pack, Kat went missing looking for medicine and he and his daughter have been out there alone."

(This post was last modified: Jul 21, 2023, 02:12 AM by Eros.)

warning for swearing

Eros looked hesitant for some reason and the father couldn’t help but shift on his paws. It was a habit he had had since he was a pup himself and one he always tried to force himself to stop and yet every time he got nervous he found his paws moving. They stilled at the sight of tears in his son’s eyes. He inhaled sharply at the sound that Archer was alive but that did not explain this whole ordeal. Archer was alive but -

Oh.

Viorel looked away quickly, trying to smother his own feelings about it. This wasn’t about him right now, and it wasn’t about Sephrina. This was about Archer and the fact that he had lost a child of his own, still he wondered if his son understood the betrayal he had commit now a little more. How the Valle man had been unable to understand how his whole world was crumbling around the loss of a child that Archer had been impregnating his girlfriend.

And Kateri was gone.

Fuck you Vanadis. Fuck you Kateri. Fuck every one of the sea gods who had condemed them since they had been dumped here.

There was a long silence as Viorel tried to hold himself together. Finally, his voice full of conflicting emotions he asked, ”Is he coming home?”

(This post was last modified: Jul 21, 2023, 02:21 AM by Viorel.)

His own words seemed to echo in the silence that followed, repeated over and over in his head. The reality of it all was too much but there was no escaping this moment much less the situation as a whole. All Eros could do, continue to do, was try his best by others without completely sacrificing himself. If he couldn't stand for himself, if the pack couldn't make its own stability, then they would never be of any use to anyone. There had to be a happy medium, a middle ground between altruism and isolationism.

'Is he coming home?'

His father's words finally came, pulling Eros back out of his head and into the immediate present. If only it were so easy. He wished so dearly that it could be, but...

"I don't know if he wants to," he answered honestly, voice quiet while ears and tail both deflated. Archer's own words were easy to recall.

"He doesn't think the banishment could be reversed, and... he's still angry."

Still hurt, but they all were. Eros wouldn't ask his father to swallow his own, very real pain. He couldn't force Viorel and Archer to make amends.

(This post was last modified: Jul 30, 2023, 06:34 PM by Eros.)

Viorel had exited, good to fade on your next post

The leader glanced back at his son in time to see the expression on the tawny face and then he quickly looked away again. He nodded once, sternly, weighing the words over and over again in his head. He couldn’t blame him for not wanting to come home, and yet he felt a fire in his belly. Couldn’t Archer see that would give his remaining child and himself the best chance of survival? Especially now that Kateri was gone and they had already lost one.

His nose wrinkled for a moment before he forced it to smooth. It had been a long silence when Viorel got to his paws, looking back at Eros with an unreadable but emotional expression. He sighed and spoke, ”I think we all know that sharing my fate is a worse punishment than any banishment.” He took a step away before pausing and adding, ”The decision is his. If he wants to come home he will be allowed, if he does not he will no longer be banished but we don’t have enough resources to spare to help non-pack members.” The last sentence was clearly added for Eros to hear. Viorel would not sacrifice the children of his cousins to support someone who didn’t want to be part of the Backwater.

Maybe this should have been a longer conversation, but he couldn’t stomach anymore. Viorel left without a further word.

'Sharing my fate,' his father put it. Eros drooped further, saddened to hear the parallel confirmed out loud. All of this was awful, undeserved, overblown. Why couldn't they get just one break? Viorel effectively lifted Archer's sentence then, but it was his final statement that left his son blinking with confusion. Would he really expect Eros not to help his brother?

His jaws parted to speak, but then his dad was turning his back to him, and in the next moment he was gone altogether. The word wait died upon his tongue and a half-step was taken, but he realized swiftly it was futile. All at once, the forest felt stiflingly still and deafeningly quiet. Empty. Something in his stomach dropped, and a deep sadness pooled within his chest like congealing blood as he lowered his haunches to the ground.

He felt completely, utterly alone.