Dead Empress Backwater the wheel never stops

for @Viorel only.

Eros didn't want to acknowledge the crawling approach of spring, but such was his role in the pack. He needed to anticipate and mitigate, and with his Ma in the state that she was, well... assumptions were not safe. They needed to make sure that their yearlings weren't dumped into the fire without warning, and at best there wouldn't be any surprises all around.

Hopefully at a moment when they both had the time for it, he tracked down his father's trail and barked softly to get his attention. Once caught up to the darker wolf's side, Eros would cut right to the chase.

"Hey, we need to talk about Tori and K..."

Of course, those two names together could mean a large number of different problems.

"'Bout how they'll be having their first Spring. Whether they know what that means."

(This post was last modified: Dec 08, 2024, 12:31 AM by Eros.)

The grandfather had been spending time with his youngest children, teaching a lesson on ice safety for about the thousandth time. He had ignored eyerolls and complaints that they knew never to trust the ice. He had told them countless times and would tell them countless more, and every time he would walk away with a heavy heart and a wish that maybe he could have changed things if he could have gone back and taught the lessons to the litters of his past.

Today was their lucky day and the lesson was cut short, glancing up to take in Eros’ serious expression he had dismissed them quickly with a smile as they scurried off. The happy expression faded quickly at the mention of Torianna and Khalon and was replaced with a weary sigh. He had been about to ask what they had done to each other now, or which pack member they had irritated with their constant bickering but Eros took it another direction.

Yellow eyes blinked in surprise, and Viorel pushed himself up into a seated position, ”I just figured Clover would…” But then he trailed off and realized the error of his ways, he couldn’t assume Clover would be doing anything at this point other than just surviving. Clearing his throat he said quietly, ”I will speak with them, and Ally?” She would also need the same discussion.

Eros' own ears eased back at Viorel's voice, gaze drifting askance. He hated what had become of his second mother. Once upon a time, she had seemed indomitable. Vayko's departure had proven that wrong with how thoroughly it had broken her spirit.

Even in that, he was finding a way to blame himself. No longer could he think of his 'uncle' without picturing @Leo's wound as well. If Vayko had been telling the truth, it was their fault that he was gone, and that @Clover's heart had been torn apart and their litter now fatherless.

"She might have. I just, don't want to assume."

It was certainly worth asking her first before approaching her children. Viorel had raised a litter with her, though; he should be the one having that conversation with Clover before her son, adopted or not.

"I'll talk to Ally. She's my responsibility."

Now.

The leader thought about protesting that Ally was not only Eros’ responsibility, but held his tongue when he realized he didn’t know whether it would be comforting or upsetting for Eros to hear that Viorel considered Ally both of their responsibility. Sometimes it still felt like there was a chasm between the two men that was impossible to cross and close, and other times it felt like there was no distance at all. Yellow eyes watched his son closely, feeling his heart rate begin to increase slightly because this conversation was likely not to be easy. It had not been last year.

Or maybe the reason his heart was beating so hard was because another coughing fit was incoming. This one was harsh, ripping on his throat and making his eyes water, until he spit some phlegm out at the end and sniffed trying to clear the burning in his nose. Kicking some snow over the mess he had made he murmured, ”Sorry.” hoarsely.

Swallowing he quickly launched into the conversation of March, knowing it would be easier than anything Eros might want to say about his health. Glancing upwards, as if Vanadis could give him the right words he started, ”I think we need to adjust our approach. I have no plans on a litter and I assume you don’t either unless things have changed since we last spoke.” Last spring the thought of children seemed to be appalling to his co-lead but maybe that was no longer true, ”My suggestion is that we make the pack know that we are open to members having litters if they come and ask our permission first, otherwise there will need to be some kind of punishment.” What that was he didn’t know, though he suspected Eros would have a different idea than he did.

content warning for eros spiraling as usual; i feel so bad for how much of a downer his every post is ^^;

It wasn't necessarily something Eros wanted, being Ally's caretaker. He fully believed that Viorel was the better option, especially due to his having so much experience in parenting where his son, obviously, had none. Like with most things in his life, Eros was likely to fail miserably. Yet Archer had wanted it to be him, specifically. He knew that, all the way to his core, even if he wished he could pretend otherwise.

And it was his fault the situation existed at all. He couldn't, would not ever, let himself forget that.

His father's coughing fit helped remind Eros why else it had to be him. The sound made his skin crawl, and he tried not to be obvious in the way his head turned away. Just like mom, all it was going to take was a cold. There were no more failsafes, their family would keep dying off and splintering away and then it would only be the two of them...

But the world wasn't stopping, not just yet. There was more to spring that they needed to discuss, more among them besides just Ally with some possibility of a future ahead. At least Viorel's beginning thought gave Eros a little fluttering of hope. Change, yes, he thought they needed that too... !

His great tawny head bobbed along. He was grateful that his father didn't continue the rhetoric of needing new Valle blood, regardless of the reasoning, and thought it very fair to allow others to have litters if they wanted it. While he could not understand the drive personally, he had learned that expecting others to share his feelings or even morals only resulted in loss and hurt. Eros could not take being burdened further by guilt and shame, merited nor self-assigned.

So then. 'Punishments.' He had stopped gesturing, the agreement ending there. His thoughts turned the matter over, peach eyes hovering over the ground between them.

"... no one will be required to help them."

His voice was a little smaller than it usually was as he offered the single repercussion, feeling confident that Viorel would think it severely insufficient. Eros couldn't think of anything else that he'd be willing to stand behind, however. He cleared his throat then; they would likely need to find a compromise a second year, but this time there was something he would not concede, and he truly was not sure how his co-lead was going to take it.

"Whatever we decide, you need to know; I am not pushing anyone out for having a litter, not ever again."

(This post was last modified: Jan 02, 2025, 12:05 AM by Eros.)

Things were going easily at first, Eros nodding his head in a fashion that the father might even describe as being enthusiastic at tines. He was not obtuse enough to miss exactly the moment that the gesture stopped happening, and in response smothered another cough that was burning at his throat. It took a moment and almost brought tears to his eyes but he was successful in stopping another outburst.

The punishment that Eros offered was at the very least a start, and he nodded once slowly and said nothing. Yellow eyes cast into the treeline as fell deep into thought, though he offered his trademark hum of acknowledgement as he tried to come up with the words. Then he looked towards Eros, studying him, making note of every inch of his sons face - suddenly deeply aware of how little time they could have left. Eros had grown into a man of his own, and time continued to march away from them, second after second.

Inhaling sharply, he blinked away the tears that he didn’t realize were welling in his eyes, ”Eros, if we end up with more litters than we can support will it be easier for you to watch them die here rather than hear that they died out there? If we don’t have enough herbs to cure illnesses, or foods to stop them or their mothers from starving, will that make it more or less our fault?” It wasn’t a malicious question, he wanted to know, would that make it easier for Eros to live with?