Velo en Cascada dancing after death

The simple, earnest glee she expressed at his response was more than endearing. Chan blinked back at her and the radiance of her smile, a blush stealing over his wolfish cheeks while his stomach tumbled with a feeling he hadn't felt since... For a moment he saw blue eyes set amongst dark fur, and those somersaults were spoiled. His own muzzle moved to slip past Flair's so that he could hide his face in her shoulder, snuggling a little closer.

'I don’t ever wanna be apart again.'

Chan didn't either, but damned if the world hadn't decimated his ability to have faith in something permanently unchanging. She seemed to be his North, though. Even if something pulled them apart, his compass would always lead him back to the peace he found in her presence. That felt as close to certain as could be managed.

'I want...

His ears twitched, and he leaned back once again, meeting her gaze. What came out shouldn't have been a surprise, but it was. Chan couldn't help but stare a moment first, an answer not immediately coming to mind. Not a no, not a yes, but eventually...

"You... aren't scared?"

The question was almost a whisper.

Even with all that the world had thrown at them, with the recurring changes of time, she chose to believe in this one constant. She’d always been of the opinion that life was what you made it, your fate something shaped by your own actions – though up until recently, that had been a mostly pessimistic outlook. But, after its roughest bruising yet, her heart had done a lot of healing in this past year, and she’d finally made something worthwhile, along with Jethro and the other wolves of the Falls. And she wanted to make Chan part of it too, fit in that last piece to complete the picture, that was the fate she chose.

Her muzzle ran up and over his crown as he nestled against her, chin coming to rest between his ears. She could only presume what feelings might stir within him, her own heart wringing with a mix of both good and bad. She’d debated for a long time, whether this was what she wanted, and then, whether or not she could ask him, not wanting to drench up all that hurt all over again. But in the end, this was her only option, letting him decide.

As their eyes met again, she saw the surprise as well as something dark; Pain? Fear? But it was too late now to backtrack, so she only waited, trying to keep her own gaze steady. The fragility of the words, when they came, almost broke her though, brows knitting together and lone ear flattening back. How could she possibly answer? She wanted to reassure him, to say that this time, surely nothing cold go wrong but… “I’m terrified,” She whispered back, finally, casting her eyes down. It felt like a defeat, admitting it, but she couldn’t lie – would never want to lie to him.

“But… There’s so many thing’s I’m scared of, I’ve never let that stop me before.” Looking back up, she smiled palely, heart twisting as she met his eyes; “I can’t… If I let fear keep me from livin’ then… I might as well be dead too.” She was no young pup anymore, she was well aware, this year was likely to be her last chance. She hurt desperately for the children they had lost last year, and loved them with all her heart, but she still longed for the chance to be a mother in truth, and actually see her pups grow up.

Terrified. Something about the confession was paradoxically as comforting as it was disconcerting. Briefly her expression was mirrored unto his own features, a moment for that shared grief that had cemented their bond. It wasn't all she had to offer him, though. Flair followed with words that were grounding, and which caused his sulking heart to stir.

That he was deeply considering it all was clear in the thoughtful crinkles across his brow as his gaze wandered once again. So much came to mind, some things hopeful but most apprehensive. Chan didn't want to lay any more tiny bodies to rest, had a renewed lack of confidence in his ability to be a good father, and worried about how Auburn would feel having new siblings so soon and unexpectedly.

Yet he couldn't deny that there was a part of him that still wanted to say yes. To believe that things really could just go simply and well.

"... I don't know. Can I... take some time to think... ?"

He looked to her with an apologetic grimace, feeling guilty for hesitating at all but it certainly wasn't something he'd be able to manage without knowing his heart was fully in it, that he actually stood a chance at doing right by Flair and their children both.

"I'm sorry."

He'd been saying that a lot recently, hadn't he?

(This post was last modified: Mar 16, 2023, 04:18 AM by Chan.)

It was all too easy to get lost in those eyes, to sink herself into their wells of emotion and memory, safe in their familiarity. But it pained her to see them so dim, devoid of that glimmer of cheer that had once been so prevalent. Above all else, she hoped that he could get some of that joy back, be it this way or somehow entirely different.

Patiently, she allowed him his time to think, quietly studying his features. Of course, she wondered exactly what those thoughts were, some of the same ones she had tumbled with in the past few months no doubt, but he had other things to consider too; He’d already become a father, she still wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about that, never mind how Auburn might feel about the whole affair. What had happened with poor Sephrina surely didn’t help matters either – not simply loosing her at all, but having to pull her body out and then carry it back to her father – she could think of few things crueler to have thrust upon him.

When he finally answered, it was to ask for more time, and she was happy to give it. This was something she’d taken a long time to consider, and she was not about to pressure him in any way, how could she possibly? His hesitation only proved how seriously he was taking this, and so he should. She shook his head at his expression, rushing to reassure: “Of course.” That was all, she’d say no more unless or until he brought the subject back up. Though, as she reached to cuddle against him once more, the apology made her startle. “Don’t,” she bid immediately, voice almost sharp; “Don’t y’ apologize.” His feelings were just as valid in this as hers, and when the answer came, even if it was a no, she would need no apology, nor would she love him any less.

(This post was last modified: Mar 19, 2023, 03:21 AM by Flair.)