Bramble Falls fly away blackbird

Early afternoon, light snow falling.

Gone Tomorrow

Winter had brought not only snow, but a blanket of silence that covered Relic Lore. The chorus of birds had been quieted and today not even the wind filled the silence. The frigid temperatures had even stilled the rushing river; the ice thick enough that Corinna was easily able to cross the temporary bridge safely. Leaving behind River territory, she had headed north, skirting the Wildwood, as far away from Hidden Tree as she was able. Ever since Torrel and Rihael had gone missing, the River matriarch had consciously avoided venturing to the birthplace of her absent mate. Her heart had permanently barred itself from warm feelings towards Indru; she did not want to venture there and risk having those particular wounds reopened.

There was no real purpose to her travel; she certainly wasn't attempting to track down Rissa. Her search party had returned home empty handed. Cori had mourned to the sky, her hallow calls defying the silent winter. The wounds were far from healed, but she did not have the liberty of locking herself away in her den again. Losing her life to depression and inactivity would not bring her children back; but there was no denying that she was growing increasingly discontent with the physical space she was in. The reminders all around her of those loved ones that had been lost were just constant reminders of the tragedies that had befallen them.

Safe inside her warm coat, the leader removed herself from that dark space, her progress hardly impeded by the falling snow. It was the unpacked snow beneath her that proved to be more of a challenge. A cloud of hot air rose around her muzzle as she huffed, pushing through the deep snow, forging a trail in virgin ground. She greatly envied smaller creatures who could run easily across the surface of the snow. But slow progress was better than none, and eventually she reached her destination; the frozen tributary that spread out before the falls. Frozen above and below, the water was only free during its short descent. it would be freezing, of course, but motion had prevented the ice from taking hold. But that hardly mattered; the important part was that this was not her River and that was all that mattered for her at the moment.

you do not know who is your friend or who is your enemy until the ICE breaks. I'm losing sense of time and space... Snow. Pure and white, it slowly drifted down from the sky, like something light and peaceful, so at odds with the heaviness of Swift River. And at the same time, it was so fitting, such a silent cover to bury their hearts, to drown them without them even noticing. It was light and cool upon his broad shoulders and strong back, a familiar, comforting sight to his silver eyes, and each puff of smoke in front of his face told him that he, at least, was still alive. Not all were so lucky, and as he tilted his muzzle towards the sky and peered at the heaven, he wondered why fate had taken their young but left their old to live. It was not the way it was supposed to be. The way of the world was that the young thrived, to take over the burden and keep the flame alight, while the elders faded away. Had he been given the chance.. would he have sacrificed himself, for her? Exchanged his heart's blood for hers? Sighing out another cloud of breath, he knew that it was pointless, futile, to wonder. It was one thing to make an assumption here, so far away, a different time, and entirely another to make the decision when truly faced with it.. and with the way things had played out, he wouldn't ever know. How does one face death? How does one choose death, and meet it with dignity? Who was the enemy? Slowly Ice lowered his head again, and gave a small shrug. Whenever he was alone these days, his tail hung limp and his eyes were sad, and whenever he was alone, his mind spun, his thoughts churned, ideas took form and shape, but.. at times, he doubted himself, and he put the whole thing off. Preparing himself for another border patrol, another rounds of their familiar territory in which four lost Tainns haunted, he slowly set off with sure strides through the snow. Despite being raised in such a climate he had no easy time, his weight always pushing his broad paws deep. He wanted to let go, sometimes, of his worries and shortcomings, of his failures, of the pack's misfortunes, to stop thinking, to just push on, but it was hard when every day, every familiar face, kept pushing him back into it whether or not he wanted to. At least, he was not distraught enough yet to let his attention waver: a very familiar scent had passed here, and he stared at her deep tracks leading north. What was Corinna doing, heading away from home? After so many months spent with her nothing but an empty husk, it seemed like the loss of Rissa had shaken her out of her stupor, but he was not quite sure who she was. He doubted she was the same. You didn't lose half your children and your mate and come out of it the same. With nothing better to do, and worries that she could perhaps ease, he set out after her. - - - - - - - - - - - - - He found her, ironically, near the place he had first met Indru. He still remembered his little game of stalk-the-wolf, and how it had ended, with a new life tumbled into his lap, a new future laid before his paws. With the stillness of the forest the rushing of the waterfall seemed out of place, a sign of life in a world that otherwise slept, but some aspects of nature defied the order of things. Water, he guessed, was one of them, and he sincerely hoped Corinna stayed away from it, because he had no desire to get wet. Grimacing a little to himself he walked in her trail, glad for the premade path and the fact that she hadn't been hard at all to find. He could see her, perhaps a little thinner and more ragged than usual as sorrow had taken its toll. Was this a sign of life, that she was out here, or some madness? It was so hard to know, when she'd been nothing but a ghost in their home for so long... The wind blew against his face, bringing her familiar scent to him, and he gave a low bark to announce his approach. The last thing he wanted to do was startle her. And at last, he had to break free from her trail and forge his own through the snow, before he came up beside her. His tail hung limp and he held his head low, somewhat hunched over but with his height and the snow it was hard to skulk properly. "Cori," he greeted her, bringing his muzzle around to touch her shoulder gently. Indru might have abandoned her again, but as long as he drew breath, Ice would not. .ice aesir

Note to self: Loreen - Crying out your name

let the stars above shine in your soul

Gone Tomorrow

Like a simpleton, Corinna sat watching the water fall over the rocks and into the pool below. She had seen waterfalls before, the sight itself was nothing knew. But something about it had captured her attention. Absentmindedly, she had fallen to her haunches in the snow - hardly caring about the sudden surge of cold to her body as she did so. The effort of her journey had warmed her, and she remained firmly seated in the snow, green eyes glued to the falling water. It was the motion that held her concentration; in a world that had fallen still in winter's grasp, seeing something move was a reminder of the life that was just waiting.

Life and death had certainly monopolized the leader's thoughts as of late. When the search party had returned and delivered the news; it had been twenty more lashes upon her heart. It had not been an unexpected response, but what mother would react emotionless towards the death of their child? She had retreated into herself, burying the pain and agony within her. Her eyes had taken on a deadened look that had only recently begun to fade. Maybe the trek out to the waterfall had been a response to that? The she-wolf had caught herself slipping back into that pit of depression that would have been near impossible to escape this time; but that wasn't an acceptable response, not so long as she had more lives in this world that needed her.

In hindsight, the wolf should have realized that her absence would not have gone unnoticed. Having been a shell of her former self for so long, any flurry of activity was sure to have attracted the attention of her pack mates. But occupied with a myriad of thoughts that flew away on the light breeze like ghosts, she paid no attention to this fact when she left. So when the woof rang out, shattering the silence and the monotony of the falling water, she half rose, head turning quickly to see who it was. But her rump met the snow once more, seeing that her caller was the pale ghost who had kept them safe for so long. "Ice." She called out, the trace of a smile on her lips.

He joined her, touching his muzzle to her shoulder. With a half wag of her tail, she dipped her muzzle beneath his cheek, offering it a solid nudge before withdrawing out of his personal space. Holding him in her gaze for a moment, she retreated from there too, returning her attention back to the waterfall. "I once got into a fight with an angry beaver here," she mused after her moment, the grin on her face audible in her voice. "Sometimes I wish all of life's challenges were that easy."

oops, suck mode engaged. xD Sorry.

you do not know who is your friend or who is your enemy until the ICE breaks. At least she was not "gone" enough to not pay attention to her surroundings, and as he trudged up through the snow, he was grateful for that. It was a sign of life, of that this venture was a step in the right direction and not the wrong — that she paid attention to the world around her. A small smile graced his lips at the sight of her own. Perhaps they would be able to salvage the wreck of their family after all. Of course, they had offered her comfort in all the ways they could during the long, dark months when the renewed betrayal of Indru had struck them, but a lot of the time it had been as if she wasn't.. there, buried too deep in her misery to acknowledge them much. Her greeting, full of warmth, was like being returned to the days before it all went wrong, and his bushy tail started to sway. Beneath all the layers of pain and loss, she was still alive, and he closed his eyes and pressed her head against hers, taking comfort in her scent. She smelled healthier, too, and as she pulled back he opened his eyes again, meeting her gaze for a moment. At times he found it odd, the way she would hold his gaze and expect him to meet it, but then again, he was not one to speak of being odd. Another small smile, a hint of white teeth behind his dark lips, and he allowed her to hold him there for a moment, trapped in the world of green, before looking down again. At times, it felt like she did not greet him as a subordinate — and, it made him wonder.. if she would mind... Her attention seemed to return to the waterfall before them, but his lingered on her for a moment, silently studying her face before sinking down on his haunches. His thick fur padded him and kept him well insulated, and sighing a cloud of smoke into the air he let his gaze sweep out across the fall too. Aside from where it hit the pool, the river was frozen on top, the odd life and movement of it defying the winter. He wasn't sure if he admired it for it, or if it annoyed him. At her voice, his ears twitched and spun. A small smile broke out on his lips, transforming into the shadow of a grin. "If all challenges were beavers, we'd all be terribly fat by now," he told her merrily, before twisting a little to stick his muzzle in her side. "But maybe you could do with a few." .ice aesir

let the stars above shine in your soul

Gone Tomorrow

Maybe this had not been the place where she and the white furred Alexander, the long-lost patriarch of the mountain, had once done battle with angry brown, furry creatures whose teeth gnashed together threateningly despite being out sized by two grown wolves. But that hardly mattered. What did matter was that this place was not accompanied by a painful memory or a familiar face. That fact was far more of a blessing than she would ever care to admit, even to the gray male beside her who she trusted absolutely. Of all the wolves to find her here, without any preconcert, she had to admit she was glad it was Ice.

Shifting to the side, she threw out a paw to stop herself from tumbling into the snow as the unexpected poke to her side came, accompanied by the familiar and amiable voice. Tail wagging behind her, Cori righted herself, playfully batting a paw in Ice's direction. "I can't say I'm terribly fond of beaver," she teased. "Besides, there are others who need the food more than I do." Aiyana, for one. Fenru and Kisla, for second. They were almost two years old now, hardly cubs. But they would always be children to Corinna's eyes, and she would always put their needs before her own. Nevermind that Fenru had outgrown her long ago, and Kisla was her paler doppelganger. The rest of the pack was her responsibility as well. That's why they stayed with her, despite her depression. "Has Jessie managed to find some of her strength, yet?" The subordinate had taken Indru's departure with Torrel and Rihael particularly hard, and then there had been the run in with the lone wolf.

"Do you think in the spring we, the pack, can be fat again?" Happy and fat and carefree? Cori looked at him, her tone slipping from merriment to something slightly more serious. Bu tit was gone in a moment, replaced by a lighthearted chuckle. "I suppose it's good we're not now. We would't be able to chase prey to feed ourselves, and then we'd really be in trouble."

you do not know who is your friend or who is your enemy until the ICE breaks. A paw of retaliation came flying and smacked him on his furry chest, drawing a laugh from his throat. He realized, then, that he'd been clinging to the vague worry that she was nothing but a broken shell, a soulless creature, that any attempt at humor would give him a blank, dead stare — but her tail was wagging and she was lightly pawing his chest, her voice light and airy, teasing. And that, was more of a reward than anything. With his air, rising towards the sky, so rose his worry, slipping out with each exhalation and dissipating somewhere above. He felt at least twenty pounds lighter, as if some of the crushing weight around his heart had been taken away, and thrown into space. He had never really tried beaver himself, as he had been raised in the lands of elk and caribou, so he had no idea if it tasted good or not. So, he said nothing, thinking, they need you to eat, too, but not saying out loud. Was it some attempt of tact on his part, or did he simply not have the heart to tell her to eat food when she was just coming out of her months-long depression? Maybe a little bit of both, and he gave her a smile, which took on a decidedly more sad quality at the mention of Jessie. She'd definitely had it a bit rough. "Aye. She's doing a lot better now — I think the run-in with that loner shook her out of it, though it's still a danger to mention .. him .. around her..." Whenever Indru's name was spoken, Jessie's face grew closed and cold, as if the memory of him was painful. While Ice's fury would reignite the moment he smelled or saw the former River king, his active emotions on the subject had cooled off. He did not need to go around and be mad at a wolf that was, probably, hundred of miles away. Question was: how many others had stopped feeling actively mad about it? Had the loss of Rissa somehow switched their focus? The threat of her abductors, and killers, hung heavy on his mind, by far out-shadowing the wrongs Indru had done to them. But how would Corinna react? Would she close down, or become mad, or just.. take it in a stride? Drawing a breath, just about to respond to her playful question, he cut it short when she spoke again — barely had she finished before he was chuckling again, giving his head a small shake. "Ahh, the fat river wolves, floundering through the snow after the light and springy deer... I'd sink ten feet into the snow, I bet." Opening his jaws in a wolf's grin his tongue lolled out for a moment, before he pulled it in again. The air was frigid and cold, so he preferred having his tongue in the warmth of his mouth. With a thoughtful look on his face Ice tilted his head back, to peer up at the pale sky and the slowly falling snow. "I don't know," he said after a moment, looping back through the subjects. "Can we? With all these memories? Can.. you?" Ice had never been god at speaking anything but bluntly, and he wasn't sure his attempt at a veiled question was.. blunt enough. He bit his dark lips for a moment. "But I will try." Slowly, his ears rotated back. But can we be happy again, in this place of dark memories? That, was something he doubted. .ice aesir

Note to self: Florence + the Machine - Drumming Song

let the stars above shine in your soul

Gone Tomorrow

Corinna had asked about Jessie, knowing full well that it could open up a can of worms that would otherwise be left untouched. Nobody wanted to talk about the old River leader or the harsh mark he had left upon his family when he had taken it upon himself to leave them behind. His old mate was certainly among the group that just wanted to forget and begin to rebuild - for far too long she had lain dormant in sorrow. Her heart still yearned for Torrel, to see the young man that he was sure to become, but the rational part of her had come to accept that it was not to be. Just as seeing Rissa grow up was never to be either. It wouldn't have been possible to pinpoint exactly when it happened, but at some point, Corinna had made the mental and emotional transition from mate to mother; it was the loss of her children that plagued her more than her losing him. As the word rolled off Ice's tongue, Cori's head dipped in a nod of understanding. "I see." A simple response for a not-so simple subject, but she had no desire to delve into the mysteries of Jessie's reaction to Indru's leaving. Truth be told, the leader couldn't understand why it had affected her so hard - as far as Cori knew, Indru and Jessie had not been on particular friendly terms with one another. But who knew for certain? If there had been more there, then it would not have surprised Cori whatsoever; Indru and she had hardly told each other everything.

But the moment of seriousness faded, replaced by grins and smiles at the thought of a large River pack trying to bring down fleet footed deer in the deep snow. The closest comparison that she could think of was her size during pregnancy, which had tended to be substantial. Imagine, a pack full of pregnant Corinna's. That would be a sight to behold, and then run away from before the hormones took over. "I'm impressed you manage at all as you are," she teased, intentionally placing a paw down into the snow, where it sank only a little bit. Ice was not fat by any means, but he was a large wolf. Useful, for bringing down deer, but significantly less so for chasing them. "Triell, Fenru, and Marsh aren't tiny either; we certainly seemed to have attracted the biggest beasts in this forest." She was joking, evident by the laughter in her voice, but who knew if she was actually correct. Corinna had not met many beyond her borders, preferring to stay home as opposed to adventuring.

That, though, could potentially change. The merriment of jokes had died, and he had pounced upon her not so subtle question of happiness. Could she be happy here anymore? It didn't seem so, why else had she left, even if only for a few hours? Looking down at her paws, the leader's body tightened up as if a guest of wind had hit her, sending chills up her spine. "No." She whispered, not even sure if he would be able to hear her. "Everything is a reminder. I can't see him or smell him any more, but he's here." Maybe that didn't make sense, but she was hopeful that Ice would be able to understand. "But the River is home. What are we, if we're not River wolves?"

you do not know who is your friend or who is your enemy until the ICE breaks. He couldn't help but chuckle at her words, and shrink down on himself; he relaxed his straight spine and pulled his head in, trying to appear shorter and, quite naturally, fatter. When was the last time he had seen her smile, heard something light in her voice? Too long his heart replied, and he knew it to be true. It was good to know she still could, though, and he grinned when she mentioned the other Tainns and Marsh. No — none of them were especially small. They were less large on the female side, Jessie being the smallest, but in no ways meek, though only future would tell how Aiyana would look. Ice doubted she'd be as buff as the males, given how slender she was now, but you never knew... Why he had brought the conversation back to the darker subject of Swift River's future he was not entirely sure. Perhaps he was curious, perhaps he wanted to solve their problems? But how? She confirmed some of his fears, and his ears fell back against his head as he leaned in closer to her. He knew that he had to do something, the decision lying in wait just under the surface of his skin, seeping, waiting, biding its time, but that alone would not save them. It would only, perhaps, save him, and only for a short while. She said what had been on his mind, and his eyes closed. Swift River was not theirs. Swift River was something they had inherited, something they had been given against their will. Swift River did not belong to any of them. The pack was theirs, but their home was haunted. "There are more rivers," he said, trying to make it sound light but he just sounded tired. Slowly he opened his eyes, and stared down at the water, where the fall crashed into it, before the surface froze to ice and the currents ran beneath it. Ice sighed out a cloud of white smoke. "Few of us were born here... We have already moved once, from our homes. What is to keep us from moving again?" But to where? The north held memories of Ruiko, and Kinis. The south? There was not enough forests, too many open spaces. The mountains? Memories of Naira and Rhysis. To the east, across the mountains? Memories of Rissa, and her faceless murderers. He felt trapped. .ice aesir

let the stars above shine in your soul

Gone Tomorrow

Would they ever be able to have a conversation again without allowing it to give way to weariness and pain? Corinna was beginning to doubt that such a thing could ever happen again, perhaps their lives were just too tainted for that. As it was, what had begun as a trip to escape the haunted memories of those they had lost and loved had become a painful conversation about them. At least, a conversation about how the rest of them were to move on. If they even could. The green eyed wolf stared down the frozen water with a steady concentration - could she break the ice that held her down and live the rest of her life? Not without painful memories, but scarred was better than immobile, wasn't it?

With a sigh and a shake of her head, Corinna turned her attention away from the water and onto Ice once more. Surveying him, she noted the slump in the Guardian's posture and the overall weariness that surrounded him. He wore it like a cloak, and without thinking, she leaned into him, her chin coming to rest upon his broad shoulder. While she was physically leaning on him, her intention was the opposite - to reassure him that he was not alone. Things were bleak, to be sure, but that did not mean they were impossible to overcome. If nothing else, the wolves of the River were survivors, and they would whether this storm like they had many others. "There are more rivers, yes," she conceded, shifting her muzzle out of his fur to respond. "I was young when I left, younger than Kisla and Fenru are now. I can't remember what I was thinking back then, what drove me to want to leave. The first time I met Indru, he bit me and chased me from the borders. Perhaps I should have known then." A sad smile graced her lips, hidden from him by the angle of her head, but no doubt heard in her voice.

"Where would we go?" It was an honest question, and frank. Corinna had no idea what lay inside much of Relic Lore - her knowledge of its territories was sadly limited. Her pack members had roamed much further than she had, and she would trust their judgement about where was safe. And if they could not tell her, then perhaps it was time for them to begin their search.

you do not know who is your friend or who is your enemy until the ICE breaks. If he had stopped to truly think about it, perhaps he wouldn't have said anything. But he didn't think about it; he was a wolf of the heart, and in a selfish manner, his heart had found someone to talk to. You couldn't mention Indru around Jessie, and without being able to speak his name, you couldn't talk of what had happened, and how to solve it. Cali? He appreciated the white she-wolf and all she did for the pack, but he did not feel the same bond to her, as he felt to her sister. Hotei? Out of the question. Kisla? His tongue just tied itself into knots, and his soul sank like a black rock in black waters. Fenru? Fenru needed him, in other ways, was young still — but perhaps he, too, was growing up? Perhaps he could talk to Fenru... Triell had enough troubles on his mind, so any talk they had would turn into Triell brooding and Ice listening; and Marsh, you couldn't talk to. He was far too practical, but perhaps it would do Ice good to get batted on the head and told to just get himself in order. But no, it was with Corinna he found he could speak, give voice to his concerns and the dead weight attached to his soul, without reflecting on how it could affect her, or why she had come here. Sighing softly he relaxed, into her, lowering his head to press it against her neck as she put hers across his shoulder. Pack, he thought softly for a moment. This was was being a pack was about. Flicking his ears, he listened to her voice, and to the forest. "I can't remember what I was thinking back then, what drove me to want to leave." A bitter, silent smile crept onto his muzzle, but he said nothing; he remembered very well why he himself had left, but perhaps his life would've been easier if he didn't. A quiet chuckle escaped him; it seemed like neither of them had had splendid first meetings with Indru. "The first time I met him, I thought he was going to eat me. He didn't," he said with a small smile, pulling up his lips in a grimace. He'd been such a mess back then — harmless, but still a mess. "I don't know, though," he said more seriously, and his thoughtful eyes and detailed response betrayed that he'd been thinking about it for some time. "The south? No. There's packs in the willows, and the cedarwood forest, and south of that, only meadows... The north? Maybe, unless other packs have moved in. The mountains?" He grimaced. Surely she'd know why he didn't want to share mountains with the Poisoned wolves. "We could go east. When we.. went .. there... It seemed, empty. As if not many packs are there, except for those bastards." He gave his head a small shake. "It'd be a fresh start, away from all the history here, except for that.. and all those sick animals running around. They've come down on our side, too, and Borden from Grizzly Hollow is up in a frenzy about it. I'm not sure we can do anything but just weather that storm..." His rambling tongue stilled, and his eyes slid to the side as he peered at her from the corner of his eye in silence for a moment. "Sorry," he finally muttered. "I talk too much." .ice aesir

let the stars above shine in your soul