Oak Tree Bend In that pathless place

@Triell 

Nayeli had wanted to believe that making it back here, back home, would be the end of her worries when it came to the loners. Her goal since returning had become rebuilding what was lost to her, and moving on from what had happened. But Skadi's message at the borders had shaken that hard-won sense of security. Nayeli found herself listless, tired of her recuperation, wishing to stretch her still-aching limbs and reassure herself that all was well, for the moment at least. She was reminded of a her childhood on the isle, of carrying tiny creatures from the shore to "safety" before the patterns of the tides could touch their lives. Were her hopes now, to protect her children, to see the Bend thrive and reclaim her place within it, as futile as they'd been when she was a naive pup? Could anything, ever, be safe, and for how long? And still, she wished now that she could pick up the pieces that had fallen like the leaves beneath the snow, to put them back as they had been, once a verdant green and upon the now-bare branches of the great oak trees that wove together overhead. Fitting the old back into their places was impossible - they were trampled and sodden and had decayed over the long winter months. But as she scrutinized those boughs, she could see the ends of the twigs beginning to bulge with new growth, a promise of spring to come.

One sharp ear flicked, lost in in thought as she pondered the leaf-buds. She didn't need to see them to know that a new season would soon arrive, she could feel that in her bones.

Steam escaped her muzzle in a puff as she turned her back on her contemplation, resuming her walk of the borders. The scents here, which she occasionally paused to add hers to, provided a myriad of information to the starred woman's nose - which other members of the pack had patrolled or crossed the boundaries recently, whether her enemies had resurfaced... many things were written in the minutia of tracks and scents and tiny disturbances to nature's usual pattern. After a while, she found herself following one particular scent. It was him she found herself turning to more often than not since her return, and as always. And yet as the sun warmed her back and brought steam up from half-melted stream she ran alongside (that very stream that she had once feared she'd drown in, and they'd both laughed a such an idea), there was something more that made her seek him out today.

 

The only thing keeping me alive

Last year he had been worried about losing Nayeli, but that feeling seemed tripled and multiplied by thousands. There were worse things, always.

If he thought he wasn't sleeping before, he was randomly napping more now than ever. There was only one place he rested best, that he felt okay. Beside her, dark hairs tangled. There was no real remedy of soothing or peace. Not any more. He was fearful also for Zera and Darrah. Would they see his daughter as a second plan? Or attempt to gain them for other use? Each fear seemed only to replace itself with something worse. He needed to do anything before he broke in madness. He was growing sick of feeling like a prisoner, and likely making his mate, his pack feel the same. He was ready for straight up conflict. This surely wasn't living. With no other choices at the moment, he carried on with routine. Sort of. After another patrol, he had other plans. Large paws scraped at the icy snow, flinging it aside carelessly. Something was going to die, even if it was only a mouse.

The sun rose higher, and  more and more of the ground was torn apart. If he left now, someone might assume a badger had thought of making a home. Despite his paws,muzzle, and chest now caked with mud,  he had nothing to show for his mess. Still he dug, if his determination alone would cause his wanted outcome to happen. If all he had to do was reach a single mouse. It didn't matter his limbs were inflamed by his efforts.

(This post was last modified: Mar 05, 2015, 09:02 PM by Triell.)

are you with me through it all?

It did not take long before Nayeli discovered him, a short distance away from the stream's thawing bank. When her gaze eventually rested on her dark king, the scene was not at all eyesome. Triell's back was to her, his hackles dancing angrily as he worked to tear a great scar into the earth - it spread black and awful across the pale snow.

The last few months had tightened the lid which Nayeli kept on her emotions. Instead of going straight to his side, she halted at a fair distance, watching him for a long moment. A strange mix of expressions warred across her face - something was certainly bothering him, and a great part of her wanted to simply rush to him, to pull him away from this vain destruction. She could certainly begin to guess at what nettled him so, but what did she really know? Maybe he had come out here to be away from them all, from her, so that for once he did not have to keep up appearances any more. Perhaps there were other things troubling him. She did not for a moment think that she knew the entirety of his mind, but she hazarded to believe that pain was easier to bear if tone didn't try to carry it alone. Once, Triell had helped her find healing that she had sought and failed to find, alone, though she had searched her way across countless leagues. And once again, he had welcomed her back when she knew not all would have been willing to hear her out, lightening her burdens by helping to shoulder them rather than casting her out to face it all on her own. She owed the same to him in return, if only she could find a way.

"Triell," was all she said at first. Having broken the spell of silence, she strode forward to join him. She was unable to hide the slight signs of worried curiosity, as well as something else deeper and instinctual - they were plainly written in her body language for one who knew her as well as he did - the slight extra sway in her step, the twitch of ear and tail, the way her eyes searched his. "Digging a new hiding place for a cache?" she asked simply, somehow she didn't think that was what had drove him to tear at the earth so powerfully that it looked as if he was attacking it, rather than simply working at the task. "You look weary, perhaps I can help. I've been wishing to test my strength a bit," she aid as she came to a halt next to him, reaching her muzzle out to gently touch his shoulder in a moment of greeting. She inspected the muddy depression as if it were not a tangible sign of the clouds that loomed around the both of them of late, scraping her claws through the cold mud speculatively. She had her own reasons for looking for him, though she said nothing of that matter now. As Triell had said, they were a dark storm themselves... and even a storm was not without it's breaks in the clouds, it's moments of sunlight, if one knew where to find them. She wanted to leave this current business behind, and try to find something brighter, together. Being close to him always brought a feeling of warmth to her, but lately there was an extra current of electricity in the air between their forms, and with proximity and solitude, it only intensified now.

(This post was last modified: Mar 06, 2015, 04:39 AM by Nayeli.)

The only thing keeping me alive

He should have been aware of his surroundings, of her close presence. Lost in the messy stream of his thoughts,  it was not till his name hung in the wind, did he halt his endeavor. Even though he was aware how close she had become it took awhile for him to actually look to her. Ears tipped back, and he quickly swallowed, stealing a couple of quiet breaths so he didn't appear to be panting. He did not need ears nor eyes to tell when she reached his side. If her absence made him all to aware of the proximity when they were close like this. The Tainn still felt the need to withhold his gaze. Knowing it was inevitable orange eyes quickly darted from the ground to her irises. Any other time a chill may of coursed his spine, but not this time. He was not fully here. There was a resemblance of an old smile, but he spared her a laugh of dark humor. "Not exactly," he mumbled, keeping his tone light. It should not surprise him how easily she read him. He didn't seem to mind so much, not beneath her gaze. There was no other he rather be an open book too.

They both knew why she would like to test her strength, brows furrowed slightly, and he shook his shoulders. "If you like." The stretch of her muzzle could not be ignored. It brought a steady beat of his tail, and he leaned into it. Needing it now more than ever. Softly,  he bent his neck, letting his snout graze her chin. It helped to bring him from his shadowed thoughts, though surely they would always be hanging over them. He withdrew when she inspected his mess. When it did not seem she would do more, he brought himself to her side again. "Unless you have a better idea," he murmured to her cheek. Rather she didn't hurt her mending paw by a useless task.

are you with me through it all?

I'm sorry for the wait D: Finals ate my life.

Triell gave a smile that seemed more for her benefit than his own, his mumbled reply drawing no real amount of surprise from her. For a moment, she felt the chill of winter's last breath worming into her fur - but then his gaze swept up at last, and she met it with her own, moving closer to the flames. The contact between them seemed to be the point upon which the universe pinned itself, and she was glad to simply stand there for a long moment, leaning against one another, his head atop hers as she sought the warmth of his chest. Whatever it was that brought him here, she'd let him decide whether it was worth dwelling upon further or not.

When they stepped back from one another, their gazes drifted back to the scar in the snow. Her own plume lifted a degree and waved as she felt Triell move closer once more, his voice sounding a little less dark this time. A sideways glance met his gaze once more, her tones humming back "I might," while her thoughtful expression slowly metamorphosed into a wry smile. Caressing his cheek, she stepped forward a few paces, their shadows merging for a moment as he brushed along his side, before glancing back at him. "Shall we leave this behind and walk a ways, then?" Nayeli half wished she could cajole him into a race... to go sprinting through the slowly awakening forest, leaving behind all their cares in some play-chase for a short time. Her tail swayed to it's own rhyme and rhythm in invitation, but they were no carefree pair of young love birds, and besides, such a frivolous game would be more than a test of her strength, it seemed more like tempting fate. Whether she believed in such things of not, she was not quite that much of a fool. Instead, she would be happy enough to share his company in peace and solitude, for now, but she wanted to leave behind the visceral dark he had dug into the snow... she hoped they might speak of the future, and the dark mar upon the earth of the Bend seemed to be a reminder of everything awful that had happened so far.

The only thing keeping me alive

He held onto the metallic of her irises, recalling how the silent language between them ensnared his heart. Left him wanting. It wasn't like he didn't want to forget the world outside themselves. When he had imagined her coming back, he figured it would be a sweet reunion that was not diluted with pain, misery, and fear. He had always imagined things being what they were. That was his first mistake. He knew change was inevitable. Look at his life time and time again. Just once he believed he would be shown more than one tender mercy. Maybe, for once he could have all he wanted and deserved it.

They viewed his destruction, he was reminded how Ice would have likely teased him for it. Something like did he have to make such a mess? As tempting as it was to laugh at himself, he could not break away from her. Nor did he have want to shatter this moment between them. They seemed so few, the kind that made him remember life was worth the struggle. Since she had returned they hadn't exactly had any care free minutes.

All it took was for her to coyly smile to ignite a crooked grin. To temporarily pull him from the darkness that plagued him. Heavy paws shuffled forward, ears drawn upon her, as his own banner beat unsteadily behind him. Uncertain, how to proceed. Could they pick things up where they left off? How much had they changed? There seemed to be no fear holding her back, and he wished to do the same. "Lets," he agreed, and with mischief he nipped at her long collar of hair, wondering if she would attempt to out do him.

(This post was last modified: Mar 31, 2015, 02:37 AM by Triell.)

are you with me through it all?

A slender ray of sun had pierced the trees some few meters away, its wan light illuminating the old snow and dormant trees in a way that could almost make one appreciate the cold dregs of winter. It was toward that bright spot that Nayeli walked now, weaving through the empty forest, ever keenly aware of his presence beside her. Her aim lead them away from the place Triell had been digging, away from the stream, and in no direction in particular. In these forests, even in the Bend, there were places less often tread.

Every few steps, her gaze flickered back to his. It was a rare thing to simply wander together, not going anywhere in particular. So many things darkened her thoughts of late - it seemed both impossible and wrong to steal away for a moment of peace when there was some much uncertainty in the air. Today, though, something was different.

As the light began to spill onto their backs through the overarching boughs, words found their way to her lips.  "When I was stuck there, I was terrified I might make it back here, only to find that something horrible had happened...." She had lost a home once, and her heart had been all too ready to fear she would loose everything again, that they would succeed in taking it all away somehow. "Things have changed... but it isn't at all as bad as I had feared." She paused for a moment before continuing, studying his features. It was odd, trying to find what "normal" was after everything that had happened, and she was sure they weren't there yet - there was too much at stake to think about it often, anyway. But there was still, irrevocably, something that tied one to the other, and though it had been stretched and tested, she yearned to believe that it held strong, as ready to regrow as the landscape around them. "I feel like fear is becoming a weight that drags at us... I don't want to give anyone that power," she said after another moment had passed, hoping that he might understand what she was digging at. If we don't steer, the currents will choose our course for us.... Through the tangled trees the two shadows moved side-by-side, quietness momentarily enveloping them as she let herself wait for his reply, her tail idly brushing his as they went.

The only thing keeping me alive

Brute's ears cupped forward in interest, but his lips remained tight. He didn't exactly care to know where they were going. Only they were together, and this was what she wanted. Just some time out of the looming shadows.

Through their twisting path his lungs pulled in the cool air, damp earth, and snippets of her. Though spring had everything about her more alluring it did not cause his steps to falter. He kept the pace she set, feeling that spring or not he would always be drawn to her. Want her. There would always be a craving for her familiar scent, a want for her curve of her crown beneath his chin, tucked against his chest. He was thinking about these things, and more. She always seemed to have him pondering better things.

Sharply, furry brows brushed together in concern. Hating the new gloom cast upon her. But, they were not so different in this way. Expecting the worse, preparing for another blow. It was quite ironic he had lost his birthplace to fire, and she to water. Did that mean something?Swarthy face relaxed slightly, happy to hear the Bend may have changed, but not into another horror for her. Moving had not exactly crossed his mind. He had done that once, and for now it seemed enough. There was no reason to leave the Bend as they had the River. Triell did his best to keep his expression steady, solid when she stared upon him so closely. The Tainn  swallowed a hushed gulp, wishing to know the rest of her thoughts behind her gentle facade. When she voiced them he did not respond right away. An ear drifted back, and he wished to wag his tail but could not.

"I don't either, but it's hard not too,"he admitted openly. He did not want to hide such things from her despite how he felt weak because of it. What was he, if he couldn't be himself? If she didn't see all he was. "But, I do know we hold our fate or you wouldn't be here, again with me." She had wanted to find her family, but she had decided to stay with him. That could not have been an easy choice. In the end she had changed both their lives. It was she who had gotten herself home again, monsters and all. Now there seemed to be a lot more placed before them. Dropping his head, he stopped in the light. "I sometimes forget the sun keeps shining long after its rained. It just always seems like it's pouring. I already have too much to lose to another storm."

(This post was last modified: Apr 02, 2015, 02:48 AM by Triell.)

are you with me through it all?

There is a moose carcass that has been scavenged by coyotes nearby. +15 Health

This place seemed to be the single brightest point in the world, compared to everything else that had assailed them of late. He was right, of course: it was all too easy to let the fear creep in and take hold. It was the first place her mind went whenever the winds drifted in from the borders, and she would always find herself testing to see if it carried their dreaded scent... and at the same time, half hoping it might, just so that they could confront them and be done with this long drawn out business, for better or worse. She could only nod in reply, searching his eyes - their was the shadow of pain there, but she could see his strength even now - perhaps now more than ever. No matter what came at them next, she wanted to face it with him. If this couldn't break them apart, what possibly could?

Nayeli let herself move closer, wanting to feel his warmth, to memorize the way the light spilled over and illuminated his black pelt, the way it warmed his features. She wanted to hold onto the deep, quiet thrum of his vocals as he responded, the surge of warmth that their proximity sent through her, to memorize it all and keep it, to use it like a lens to focus her thoughts whenever the dark seemed to ready to creep in. But then maybe such thoughts would end up proving more of a distraction... she breathed in his scent as she stepped alongside him, brushing her muzzle along his mane once more and walking in a half-circle."Perhaps... the right thing to do is build toward a future that can withstand any storm," she mused in response. She wondered if he might share the same thoughts as her on this particular subject, today.