Fallen Tree Cove Paladin

Noon—Moderate snow -3 ° F, -20 ° C. AW and a tag for @Kajika

Lunette Vuesain

I’ve got my love stuck in my head

Snow fell. It clung to the world like a white blanket, covering everything Lunette had ever known—which, to be fair, wasn't all that much. She was sure Ismena had been everywhere by now (no, okay, not really—), but Lunette herself had refused to pass out of sight of the Lake itself. Ironically, the older she got, the more she stayed close to the den. She was supposed to grow bolder, venture further, follow her parents on hunts more often, maybe even start experimenting with chasing small prey herself.. truly, she had not felt her teeth end the life of another without it being three-quarter dead first. The few times she'd found herself alone and given a snowshoe rabbit a run for its life the uncomfortable surge of adrenaline had left her bothered, and she found herself trying less and less often these days.

Snow fell. In the cold and pale winter air the flakes were small and sharp, each perfect, each unique, coming down to form a pattern and merge seamlessly with its kin. Lunette laid underneath one of the fallen trees giving her pack its name, watching the flakes float down with great dignity. The log prevented it from touching her. At first the whiteness had scared her, but now she was used to it, but she still didn't like the feeling of it weighing down on her back. It was just.. strange, but it wasn't going away, and her sigh pooled into the air like a puff of white.

Snow fe—she snapped at the empty air in front of her. Not again. She was tired of making that damn observation, of watching the snowflakes fall and doing nothing, so—rather brusquely for being Lunette—she stormed out from underneath her safe-space log. Her nose twitched as snowflakes fell on it, and her ears flattened, and her tail tucked itself against the inside of one pale hind leg. The frustration which had empowered her leeched out into uncertainty; was this such a good idea at all?

"Kajika," she murmured to herself, her voice light and childish still, even though her frame had grown leaner and taller. Aside from some romps with Ismena as her courage, and a few odd dawn treks on her own around the territory, she hadn't really.. well.. gone anywhere. And no matter how safe and comforting and inviting the den was, part of her was screaming for the world beyond.

So she called his name again, louder this time. "Kajika?"

(This post was last modified: Dec 08, 2016, 06:38 PM by Lunette.)

Kajika didn't think he would ever get used to how cold it got in Fallen Tree Cove and was glad that this time of year only lasted a short time. A shiver ran through him as he made his way up from the river after getting a drink. His earlier hunt was disappointingly unsuccessful and he still had a border patrol that he needed to get finished that day. He had also taken noticed of the snow that had begun to fall which he stopped to admire for a moment. He did love the snow and how it looked on the trees of the forest but sometimes it would be nice to have it without all of the cold. Of course he knew that wasn't possible but it didn't hurt to think about it sometimes.

Thinking of things like that helped get through the days sometimes when there were so many things to worry about and so many more important things to worry about. Sometimes it was nice to think about the things that were ridiculous, or fantastical just to take the monotony out of the day. Kajika shook his head getting the snow off his pelt and the thoughts out of his mind as he continued up to the communal den for a chance to get warm before starting the patrol. It was something he did everyday being Vespers second made it more important than it had ever been even if he'd always done it. He was proud at having made the position and took it very seriously.

He hadn't quite made it to the communal den when Lunette’s voice reached his ears. He wondered what it was that she needed and hoped that she wasn't in trouble. Fearing that she might be the dark second picked up his pace in his hurry to get to her. He rather liked the girl but worried about her since she didn't seem to have the desire to explore like most other puppies. He expected to find her at the den but instead he found her next to a log that he hadn't paid much attention to before.

“Hello Lunette, what can I do for you?” He asked the young pup once he'd found her.

(This post was last modified: Dec 08, 2016, 09:32 PM by Kajika.)

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Lunette Vuesain

I’ve got my love stuck in my head

By the time Kajika showed up, Lunette had already decided it was a bad idea.

A really bad idea, and—on top of that, she had probably pulled the dark second from something important. He was papa's second in command after all. He probably had duties, things he needed to do or the pack would fall apart, or at least increase papa's workload, or something. Important grown-up things little girls knew nothing about. And now, selfish fool that she was, she had taken him from his job. Disturbed him. Or would he even show up? She wasn't a scion of the pack—she had older siblings laying claim to the title. Who was she to think that she was worth anything?

She stood crestfallen in the snow. It piled on her scruff and hips, a white blanket kept cold by the thickness of her coat. Her first real winter coat. It was thick and warm, creamy and silver, but part of her hated it—hated the long legs and big paws, the depth of her chest, the muscle developing along bones. Things were changing and the past months, they had changed fast.

So when Kajika found her, she still stood next to the log, but instead of staring expectantly at the forest her head hung, muzzle pointed at the ground. He had come for her, after all, and it only made her feel worse. She shuffled her paws awkwardly in the snow, not at all soothed by his level tone of voice. What if he was only pretending, to cover up his annoyance?

She shuffled her paws again. Honestly, the least she could do for him now was admit the foolish reason she'd called for him—explain why she'd taken him from his important duties. "I just.. uhm, I..." She didn't do a very good job of it. Her throat felt thick and hot and painful, and she wished she could just sink through the snow and become one with the frozen, hard earth. "I know you're probably.. busy, and, like, doing important things, but—" She didn't know which she was the most embarrassed about; her stuttering, or the fact that she'd called him over? "I thought that, maybe, you could take me 'sploring again, but.. youprobablydon'thavetime aaaand .. it'sabadideaanyway," she finally finished, staring dejectedly at her silver paws buried in the disturbed snow.

When Lunette's call reached him all thoughts of what he needed to still get done left him and his only concern what what she needed. It didn't matter if he needed to do a border patrol or do some more hunting before the day was done. Though the pups weren't his he felt a responsibility toward them because they were the pups of his alphas. If they needed him for anything he would be there for them because his pack was his family and he didn't plan on letting them down.

However when he found her next to the log the scene wasn't anything that he expected. He was glad that she wasn't hurt but she didn't seem happy at all. The snow had started to collect across her back meaning she had been standing there long enough for that. Most importantly and the first thing he noticed was how she held her head causing him to wonder if perhaps something had happened that would have upset her. Immediately he ran his gaze over the forest around them for any sign that something had happened. He also checked her over for any injury as he waited for her to answer his question since it wasn't apparent why she called him.

Kajika didn't understand why she seemed to be so upset until she finally answered him but it wasn't exactly clear at first what was going on. He gave her time to finish her thought as she first apologized for taking him away from doing important things and then why she had called him came out. The last part made his brow furrow even more than it had at the beginning. After she explained all of that it had become a little clearer as to why she seemed to be so upset. He stepped forward until he was only a few inches from her before using his muzzle to raise her head so that he could look her in the eyes.

“Lunette, you mustn't worry about taking me away from anything important, whatever you need is just as important as anything I might be doing.” He wanted to make that clear to her so that she wouldn't feel hesitant to call or find him if she needed him. “Now as for exploring I would love to take you but I'm not sure why you would think it's a bad idea.”

It was surprising that she wanted him to take her exploring and he hoped that she would continue to ask him. He had always thought that exploring was important to do.

(This post was last modified: Dec 12, 2016, 04:23 AM by Kajika.)

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There is a deer that was killed by a lynx nearby. +10 Health

Lunette Vuesain

I’ve got my love stuck in my head

She was sure he'd leave her, then. Walk away with a neutral you're right and disappear into the snow—not out of cruelty, because she had never considered Kajika to be cruel, but out of.. well.. the sheer fact that Lunette wasn't all that important, and that he was an adult, doing adult things, and why would an adult possibly want to hang out with little silver Lunie? She was the fifth child of the Vuesains. She was timid and backwards and not at all skilled at survival. She was—

—being touched. Kajika's large, dark head dipped down, a menacing movement in the corner of her eye, like a Reaper coming down to take her for her insolence (—I never said anxiety is full of logic and rationality, did I?). Already awash with guilt, she forced herself not to flinch out of consideration for him; she'd probably worried him enough today. No reason to make her think she was afraid of him, for she wasn't. It was his rejection she was afraid of.

Regardless of her racing heart he did not make any attempt to harm her or brush her off—the former would've been unexpected, the latter not. Instead, she felt the warm bridge of his muzzle underneath her jaw, and, slowly, she let him raise her head. Her gaze lingered on the snow as long as it could, but eventually had to shift upward, catching the ruff at the edges of his cheeks and then, unbidden, meeting his warm, golden eyes. She didn't want to; it was dangerous, threatening to unlock the flood in her heart and sending it all spilling out but then.. he would probably think her ungrateful, or something.

So she kept it all in, and let her silver ears sweep forward to drink in the words he said. Not that she believed them, of course—it's in the nature of anxiety to assume everyone lies to you to spare your feelings. "Okay," she replied meekly, making a mental note to never take Kajika from his important duties again because.. well. Maybe she knew her own worth better than him.

But why exploring was a bad idea was a different beast entirely. Shrugging a little too casually she lifted her smaller head from his nose and looked down to the lake's edge. "Because I came up with it," she mumbled quietly, hoping he wouldn't hear her, and if he did, that he wouldn't ask. She didn't want to have to explain, and instead, took a few steps forward. Her tail hung down to the ground, not at all the image of a young explorer off on adventure. Sighing among the snowflakes she leaned briefly into Kajika, pressed her narrow shoulder to his chest and closed her eyes. She wanted to believe him, and her reasons not to lay with her, and not with him.

"I don't know where we could go, though," she mumbled into his fur.

Seeing little Lunette so sad was something that Kajika didn't like and wished he could make better for her. He didn't understand why she was so sad or why she would think that he was too busy to come and help her with anything she needed. This he knew was up to him to help her to understand that he wouldn't ever be too busy for her. Not only was it part of his job to look after the pups but he cared for Lunette, that she was safe and happy. The first thing he wanted to do was make sure she knew that he couldn't ever be too busy for her. So he lifted her eyes to meet his and told her in such a way that he hoped she would understand.

He was aware that Lunette wasn't a pup the was going to venture too far from home and if he were honest he didn't like her doing so. Even though she was nearly a yearling he worried about her safety. However, he felt taking her out exploring might help her to gain some confidence eventually. He didn't know how many times he would have to take her out before it helped but he was willing to go out with her whenever she needed him to. It would also give him the chance to see what might interest her so they could visit those things more often. He thought that might bring her out of her shell too but he wanted her to do it on her own time. Forcing her wouldn't help her at all.

Kajika’s head tilted a little to the side as the only word out of her mouth was 'okay’ and it was said as if she wasn't quite sure. He was perplexed that she hadn't cheered up even a little as he assured her that he hadn't been too busy to come and spend time with her. Saying more about it was something he considered but in the end he decided against it, that perhaps she needed to be shown that she wasn't burdening him by calling him and asking him to take her exploring. He wanted her to go out and have fun, it's what pups were supposed to do so he thought once they got out she might cheer up some.

When she answered his question about why it was a bad idea he was glad to have asked the question because it gave him some insight as to how she was feeling. Even though it had been a mumbled answer he still understood her and had to address it. She had come toward him and leaned into his chest before he had the chance to respond. “Nonsense,” he stated in response as he pressed her against his chest with his muzzle, “You could never come up with a bad idea especially when it comes to exploring. I think once we get out there you'll find out just how much of a good idea it really is.” He wasn't sure if that would help her but he had to try and help her to feel better.

While she was still pressed against him he heard her mumble about not knowing where to go. He smiled, “Lucky for you I know about plenty of places we could go. I don't know if you know this but before I came to Fallen Tree Cove I used to do a lot of traveling so we can visit some really fun places.” He kept his tone upbeat hoping it might spur some excitement in her. “Shall we go and see what we can find?”

(This post was last modified: Dec 30, 2016, 06:24 PM by Kajika.)

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Lunette Vuesain

I’ve got my love stuck in my head

He was warm. The darkness behind her eyelids merged with the darkness of his fur, a shapeless shadow for her to hide in. The black fur was slightly wet from melting snow, trapped between his skin and hers—it was only when she burrowed into the coarse hairs that she felt the heat of his body. It was soothing, but bittersweet. A reminder of what she wanted, but could not have. Any moment he was going to remember that he had more important things to do, and he would be gone.

And she'd be alone with a memory in the snow.

But he.. didn't go. At least, not yet. Instead, his jaw pressed against the narrow ridge of her spine, folded around her shoulder, and pulled her closer to the dark warmth. And, she realized with a dread weight in her heart—he had heard the mumbled response to his question, the thing which trod too closely to the truth for her to truly bear. In the throes of her self-pity and woe, she had wanted to tell him, to let the world know all the ways in which she was wrong and hurt, but the confirmation that he had heard such a pitiful tale.. her heart hardened. The emotion could not be translated to words. It was a formless monster with an indistinct voice, and teeth which left no bruises where they had pressed hard against skin. She was ashamed, of how pathetic and feeble the words sounded when breathed into the harsh air of reality. She hated herself for having said them.

So she didn't say anything. Just breathed in the wet-warm scent of his fur, comfort and safety and security edged with the peculiar scent of winter. She was still dead certain she could come up with bad ideas—and she had—but to argue with him would be ungrateful. And besides, his defense of her idea was flimsy and had nothing to do with her, just the nature of the idea. Exploring. The big, uncertain unknown, fraught with danger and wolves with snapping, snicking teeth. Her right ear folded back against her head. She was already marked by the world, a notch in her ear, and she still hadn't told anyone how close she had come to death that rainy day.

But then he went to safer places, speaking of himself, his past. Lunette pulled back from his embrace, brown eyes wide with wonder. "You haven't always been here?" she squeaked weakly, not sure what to do with this revelation. Part of her was shocked—Kajika was one of those constants, and to imagine a Fallen Tree Cove without him.. or to even imagine him coming from somewhere else.. but it also made sense, didn't it? He wasn't a brother, and only the children of mama and papa were born here. "I, well.. yes.. but.. I don't want to go too far..." Her gaze, still wide and shocked, fell again, to the snow-covered world and the humps of rocks and logs. "I want to be back before nightfall..." With Kajika or not, the idea of spending time away from home in the dark was terrifying.

The dark man didn’t understand where she would get the idea that she only had bad ideas. He worried that someone had put it in her head but who in Fallen Tree Cove would have done something like that? Kajika knew better, they wouldn’t and if they had Vespertio would’ve had something to say about it as would he. Lunette was his daughter and the alpha would protect her with his life there was no doubt in Kajika’s mind that he would as he had seen it before. No there had to be some other reason that she thought that. The problem was that he didn’t know how to fix it besides to tell her that she didn’t have bad ideas and to showher that going out exploring wasn’t bad either.

Kajika hoped that in time he could help her to not feel as she did but for now she needed him and he was there for her as he always would be. He held her against him hoping that it would give her some comfort for at least that moment and that it might help her to be strong to go do the exploring that he felt she really wanted to do but was just unsure about. Taking her out on exploring expeditions was something he didn't know for sure if it would help her but he wanted to at least try. By holding her against him he wanted to show her that he was there for her whether it was as a teacher and friend like he was to Moonshadow or and exploring partner. He also hoped it would show her that he was never to busy for her no matter what tasks he might have to do.

When she told him that she didn't know where to go he felt that telling her a little about himself would help. Maybe hearing that he had traveled a lot before settling in Fallen Tree Cove could show her it might be scary out there but it could be fun too. He wanted it to be fun for her and he wanted her to see that learning about her home and the places around it could be very rewarding too. Starting small however was probably the best thing when she seemed to uncertain about going out in the first place.

He let her go when she pulled away from him asking about what he'd told her. “No I haven't. I left my birthpack a long time ago and came here to the lore. Then I wandered for a while and met some other wolves one of which helped me to finally come here to the cove,” he explained. It wasn't everything but he hoped it might stir something inside of her. Kajika smiled, “Good, we don't have to go far if you don't want to. I want you to feel comfortable so that it can be fun because that's what's important.” he hoped she would tell him when she felt that it was time to come back. However, she did have another request before they got moving, “I can most certainly have you home before dark, you don't need to worry about that.” He would keep close watch to be sure to get her home in time an

(This post was last modified: Jan 02, 2017, 04:02 PM by Kajika.)

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Sorry for the massive wait. <3 You want to wrap it up and have an up to date thread, or keep going?

Lunette Vuesain

I’ve got my love stuck in my head

It wasn't something anyone had done to her; she was born with the monster in her head, the voice she couldn't control whispering things in her ear. Things like, you're worthless, why would anyone care about you?, no one has time for you, you're not important—evil things she had never heard, but her mind had invented. Eek, the tail-less savage wolf, had added some things to the constant commentary her mind kept up: don't go too far or you'll die, wolves you don't know are Evil, the world is dangerous. Lunette hadn't even told Ismena. She had just tried to smile and keep up with her whirlwind of a sister. Something about her had kept the fears at bay.

Kajika, by virtue of not being her sister, was a constant battle; the monster in her head said he hates you and you're annoying, you should leave him alone, but Kajika's physical voice—and body—said it's fine, come on, we'll have fun. She didn't know what to make of it. She wanted to just fall facefirst to the ground and lose consciousness, because then she wouldn't have to feel the constant struggle.

But what would be nice, though of course impossible, was to silence the questioning voice in her head, and just trust Kajika, and bask in his presence.

She really liked him.

I'm glad you came here she wanted to say, but she couldn't get the words past her teeth, so she remained silent, just looking at him. I'm glad you're here. He smiled, and she thought, barely aware of it, that she could kill for that smile. To make him smile. To do anything for him—Papa and Mama and her siblings loved her because they were family, but Kajika.. maybe she had something to prove, to him, but she was too afraid to think about it. Instead, she nodded. Fun. It wasn't even about exploring, about skills, about—I dunno, living? It was about fun. Could she.. could she do fun? Could she shove away the monster long enough to have fun? She wasn't sure, but for him, anything—she would try. Tentatively, her tail gave a tiny little wag. But what was she supposed to say? Thanks? That's good?

So she didn't say anything, just took a couple of step in a random direction, as if to say, come on, let's go, show me something.