Dead Empress Backwater ashes of eden

RE: You come across a squirrel that’s been startled out of its torpor. Vayko has claimed the Serach RE! Open to 1 other member of the pack.

what i really need now is a double shot of crown

Vayko’s luck lately… had not been bad. His nose still didn’t quite feel the same but he was still managing to smell normal it seemed. While things had not gone smoothly with Modesto’s departure, good had happened since then. His father had turned up, and in that moment he had faith that his mother might as well. He could only hope for her warm embrace and kind words, for the pride she’d show in him for raising his own kingdom alongside his cousin, for making their new home out of a tragedy.

A scent flooded his nose, confusion and excitement rising in him. It was unusual to see a squirrel out of their nest during the winter months, though he was not mad about it. Instantly, he leapt into action, making sure that he stayed downwind of the creature. He quickly pursued it, trying to keep his paws light as his teeth barred and he pounced on the creature who realized too little too late that he was there. With a swift bite, the unusually plump creature was limp in his jaws. He hummed softly, considering instead of eating such a snack, taking it to a certain healer in the pack who might need food… in case she was wearing herself thin with always having work to do.

It was, of course, purely strategic. With how often he got hurt, he needed to make sure the medic was alive and well to treat him of course…

The Valle woman was sticking close to home for a few days. Helping out and all where she could. It was only fair since she was still a part of the pack but she still had a lot on her mind. She also knew that she couldn't keep venturing away from the Backwater as often as she could.

She made her way through the territory not entirely sure what she wanted to do next. Sharlee wasn't really in the mood for a hunt, all that running was just too much at the moment. She thought to go see Clover and talk to the healer. Maybe her friend could help her sort things out. Her paws started to carry her in the direction of the healers den.

Then she spotted her brother. She wondered what his thoughts about Modesto were. Maybe he could help her better than anyone since he was just as close to their aunt as she was. She picked up the pace to catch him before he disappeared with the squirrel she'd seen him catch.

"Vayko, can I talk with you for a moment?" She called out to him.

what i really need now is a double shot of crown

A voice called out to him and he identified it immediately at his sister, turning his gaze curiously as he tilted his head, setting his prey down as he nodded towards her. “Of course, you know I’m always here to talk.” His sister had been the one to stick by him through and through. Unlike his aunt, he had never questioned his sister’s loyalty to the pack and the kingdom they were trying to create… he knew his aunt’s heart had not truly been in it, he was just saddened by the way she had chosen to leave.

“What’s up? Have you eaten?” He asked, nudging the squirrel towards her. Originally he had been planning to gift it to Clover, but his sister was right here and he wasn’t sure if it was to scold him for his behavior in handling the Modesto situation as Vi had done shortly after it happened, or if perhaps she was seeking advice of her own. It had truly felt like forever since they had been able to talk at all, both busy with there own responsibilities, but he would always make time for her should she need it.

Sharlee smiled at his words. She knew that he would always be there for her when she needed him. Though she felt she'd become more independent since she'd arrived in the lore she really needed him. "Thank you Vayko. I couldn't ask for a better brother." She really did consider him the best brother. Especially after the way he'd cared for her after she'd woken up in this place. Then what Vi had told her shortly after they'd become a pack.

Sharlee looked at her paws, "I'm not really that hungry right now but thank you," she told him. She hadn't been for a few days. Everything on her mind was causing her to lose her appetite. "I wanted to ask how you felt about what happened with Aunt Modesto." She already knew everything about what had happened. Vi had told her but what she didn't know was how Vayko felt, maybe he needed to talk it through with her too.

what i really need now is a double shot of crown

He would never regret the decisions to not continue the search for his homeland… he had made something worthwhile here that he never would have been able to do if under the suffocating reach of the Estuary and the elders who sat on the council. Even now, while missing Modesto, there was a part of him that regretted making her his advisor, letting the council have such sway over him in his new lands… perhaps that had just been his fear to escaping the Valle legacy.

Now? He couldn’t help but see his cousin’s side of things. Family was hardly trustworthy even under the best of circumstances, and it was time to move on. He offered his sister a soft and genuine smile. She was one of the few who could draw such a reaction out of him as he hummed, letting a soft rumble from his chest escape as he considered her words. A frown on his features. “Are you sure? You’re looking thinner, Shar, you need to eat.” They had enough in the caches. They had all been fighting tooth and claw all winter to make sure the entire pack was fed for.

The statement came and there was a hint of sadness in his eyes the moment she said her name. “I… don’t know.” He admitted softly, a pained sigh escaping afterwards. “I know why he did it. I know why he made the decision he did… but it’s hard. I relied on her so much; she was family, in more ways than our other family ever was.” He admitted as he scraped idly at the ground with his paws. “But even now, I wonder why I made her my advisor in the first place. We made this pack to get away from the rules of the Estuary and the council… and I made a council member my advisor.” He needed to talk it out, and his sister had been the first one to wholly offer her ear without the promise of judgement at the end. “I just feel lost. I don’t know if I can trust the decisions I make.”

The more days that passed with Modesto's absence the more unsure Sharlee became. She'd told Vi that things were different for her in the backwater than they were in the Estuary. She fully believed that but she'd also thought of herself as independent. The longer this progressed she wasn't sure she was as independent as she'd thought. Maybe she'd relied on her aunt more than she thought or maybe it was just grief. Sharlee didn't know.

What she did know was that she'd been truthful with Vi when she said that she wasn't angry. She wasn't and doubted she ever would be. By all accounts Modesto had crossed a line and disrespected her leader. Sharlee offered her brother a reassuring smile, "I'm sure, I just haven't been able to eat very much lately," she admitted, "I'll try to do better." She hadn't even realized that she'd been getting thinner. Her mind had been so caught up lately it hadn't even occurred to her.

It seemed Vayko was in the same place as she was when it came to how he felt about Modesto. Everything that he said about the situation mirrored her own feelings about it. "I don't blame Vi at all. Modesto did what she did and regardless of the fact she was family in the end she disrespected her leader." In Sharlee's eyes that was just something that wasn't done. "I know, she was there when they weren't. She taught me so much and I'm sure there was more to learn. It is hard, really hard to just move on from her no matter how angry I might be with her." Sharlee was angry at her aunt for saying what she did and pushing Vi to the point of doing what he had to. She was angry with her for never giving the backwater a real try. Most of all she felt lied to. Sharlee brushed her brothers muzzle with her own, "Because Vi you were so close with her. Like you said you relied on her and you trusted her to do right by you." Sharlee completely understood why her brother chose Modesto. Even though she'd been hurt by it at first she'd come to understand in time. She smiled sadly for her brother, "I don't think you make bad decisions Vayko not when you have all the information. You didn't where it came to Aunt Modesto, because you felt you needed her at the time." She didn't think his choice of counsel made him a bad leader or bad at making decisions. "There's nothing wrong with that, I feel like she had us all fooled."

what i really need now is a double shot of crown

Vayko had seen his aunt as one last way to cling to home. The way to cling to the ocean he had so desperately missed in his first few months. He saw her as a connection to his mother because of their close bond. She had taught him everything he knew, and he had trusted her counsel while recognizing she had her own biases. He knew she hadn’t approved of the things Viorel had done, he had also just expected her to keep her head. She had always been so good at it… but something had made her finally snap.

The promise came and he nodded. He just worried about her. He always would; she was his sister… and now, she was the one thing he had left to cling to as well. Sure, he had Viorel… but it wasn’t the same. They were cousins, and they were close… but not as close as he had been to Sharlee, Amondi, or Modesto… “I… ran into dad.” He admitted softly to her. It had been new, bringing him back to the Backwater… and he was not sure if she had run into him yet herself. “He said he got separated from Mom… that they were looking for us.” He stated again, quietly as if it were taboo. What if every wolf of the older generation abandoned him? There was a part of him that preferred his parents being missing to the thought of them leaving.

He listened to her statement with a hum, and he shrugged. There was a part of him that did blame Vi… he tried not to, and he understood logically… but it was hard. “I’m not as angry as I feel I should be.” He admitted, confiding in his sister and trusting her to not share it elsewhere. “Neither side was blameless… I was there, at least when it all first started. He turned his back on blood, the one thing she had left to cling to and she… snapped. I knew many of the feelings she expressed. She had expressed them to me before.” He finally let it off his chest. “She disapproved of his union with Vanadis and Clover both last spring… she didn’t think he was leading right but she always kept her opinions to me. She never caused a fuss… not until he spat on everything that she and all of our parents had stood for. I understand why she snapped… and I feel like it’s just made it so much harder.”

He sighed again, sitting down as he shifted the snow around with his paws as busywork. “He came to me after… I walked away when it was all happening. He got mad at me for it; a part of me thinks he’s still mad for not standing up for him but how am I supposed to do that when he puts me between two people I love like that and just expects me to pick a side?” He sighed softly. “She didn’t have me fooled; I knew her disapproval from the start. She wanted to return home; she wanted the Estuary just as we all did at first.” They had quit on her by quitting on their birthland. “I just feel so confused. It feels like nothing makes sense anymore, Shar.”

This whole situation with Modesto had left things in complete shambles. Vi and Vayko were both really upset about it. She was just as upset as the both of them and didn't know what to do with everything she was feeling. She'd done her best to console her her cousin and now she was doing everything she could for her brother. Even still she didn't know if it was enough. If the words she spoke to try and help them feel better were going to help them at all. She knew the things she'd said but she wasn't even sure they were helping her even if everything she'd said had been true.

She knew that Modesto hadn't agreed with anything they'd been doing. How she'd felt about Vanadis and Clover. Now it had all come out in such a way that they were all still struggling to comprehend. Sharlee wanted to know why her aunt had stayed why she would purposefully put them through this. What was her excuse for doing this to her and Vayko when she been there for them and taught them everything they knew, how was that right?

Sharlee was still thinking about all of this when her brother spoke of their father. For a moment everything stopped, all of her thoughts. She'd believed she'd never see her mother or father again. That Maybe because they hadn't shown up they'd been left in the Estuary. She finally was able to form a coherent thought on this new revelation. "What do you think about him being back?" She asked because she most certainly didn't have any idea what to think. Except for where was their mother at, they needed her and she wasn't there.

When Vayko started speaking Sharlee was attentive to everything that he said. It was the way he spoke and sound, like the whole world was crbling around him. She felt like he'd been holding it in for awhile and it pulled at her heart. She loved her brother and would do anything for him but she didn't know what to do, or how to help him. In that moment she was angry at Modesto for doing this to him. Sharlee couldn't take it anymore she closed the distance between them and embraced him tightly. "I won't do what she did to you Vayko. I won't hurt you like she did and make you feel the way you do right now. I love you." The words just came tumbling out of her and she couldn't stop them. After a few moments she stepped away to meet her brothers gaze. "She put you in a terrible position and then when she snapped and it all came out what were you to do?" Sharlee also didn't think it was right for Vi to be angry with Vayko for walking away, "I think you did the right thing staying out of it, even if Vi is still angry with you. It would be unfair to make you choose between him and Modesto when you care for them both so much. I don't think there was anyway she would have ever been happy here. She cared too much for the old ways and we have been trying to live our lives differently. None of us are blameless Vayko because things didn't have to happen the way they did and now we are left to pick up the pieces of our hearts and figure out how big the mess she left behind is. I'm angry at Modesto for letting it get to this point but maybe this is what she wanted all along."

what i really need now is a double shot of crown

She was a good listener. Where he had gotten impulsivity and reactivity, Sharlee had appeared to get the opposite… sometimes it felt like he was the worst traits from both of their parents while she were the best. The question was a complicated one to answer and he shrugged. “I don’t know… I was excited at first but something just feels off… I don’t know if it’s just because I don’t trust anyone older than us anymore, or if it’s something else.” It was all he could think of as an excuse.

His eyes softened as she closed the distance and he welcomed the embrace. He welcomed the genuine connections he had formed here, stripped of all the pomp and circumstances that had surrounded their birth pack… it didn’t matter that they were Valles, just who they were as wolves. That brought him some kind of comfort. “I don’t know…” He admitted at her rhetorical question. “I tried to tell him that, but I think he’s just too personally involved with the situation to truly see where I’m coming from.” He admitted again as he sat down.

“Did she just play us? I’m the one who brought her here. Do you think she actually wanted to try and make it work here or was she just waiting for a reason to leave?” He had so many questions and he accepted that he likely would never get answers… “I’m angry too. I’m angry our family can’t stay together no matter what like they promised. I’m mad at Aunt Modesto for betraying this legacy we’ve built. I’m mad mom hasn’t found us. I’m mad Aunt Sita left and abandoned her own child... what does being a Valle even mean anymore with all of that baggage?”

It was surprising news to hear that their father had showed up. Sharlee had gotten to the point she didn't think she'd ever see him again. She was curious though since Vayko had talked to him what he thought. A lot of time had passed since she'd last seen her father. She was worried at her brothers answer but it mirrored some of what she was feeling too. "I'm struggling trusting the old ones too," she admitted, "But I have to wonder what's giving you the feeling that something is off." She trusted his judgment in these sorts of situations. No matter what happened with Modesto she didn't think those sorts of instincts could change. Besides Modesto…well that was a whole different situation.

The Valle woman wanted him to know that she wouldn't do what Modesto had done. That he was important to her and that she never wanted to hurt him like that ever. He was the one she was closest to and she didn't know what she would do without him in her life. There was Vi too that they had to think about and what was going on with him in all of this. What Vayko made sense after what she'd been told. "You might be right. I mean she did insult him and his family. It doesn't get more personal than that." She wasn't sure that Vayko knew about the last part but it wasn't yet place to say so she kept that to herself.

Sharlee looked down at her paws at his question. This might be hard for Vayko to hear but he was asking her thoughts. "I think she was. I think maybe when she first came it might have been genuine but when she saw what we were doing she didn't want any part of it. I think she planned to get kicked out " that was Sharlee's theory anyway but it was just that, a theory. There wasn't much she could do with it either. She frowned as he brother expressed his feelings about the things that had happened. Sharlee frowned as he named all of those he was mad at and she honestly felt the same. She looked up at him when he asked what it meant to be a Valle, "Maybe it's time we reinvent that too just like we did with the pack?"