Driftwood Surge on the precipice of the dark

In good word, the dove wished that she could swat the feelings away under the rug. Forget that they existed and tell the girls that she was fine - that they were fine and would be fine. I don't trust myself, and while she believed that she could trust every individual in the Surge she couldn't put that kind of faith out when this time of the year brought in very strange actions. I want a family. Desperately and I'm afraid that if I don't keep to myself I won't be able to stop myself. She didn't expect them to understand, especially not Oksana, but Anastasia was going to do everything that she could to avoid breaking the law this season. It was stupid of her to think that she could do that after what had happened the last and Rory's explanation that it hadn't never been this bad made sense. It affects everyone differently, as it made emotions heightened and values loosened.

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The crow had so many questions but something told her that now wasn't the time for all of them. Just the ones that could help her to understand Ana’s situation better. Oksana didn't understand why Ana would say that she didn't trust herself at first but then she thought about what her mother had said and the meeting. Mum said that it was hard to keep control of emotions, she said trying to remember how Inna put it. Is that what you mean? The girl whimpered when Ana spoke of wanting a family and how bad she wanted one. She scooted a little closer, I know it's not what you mean, she said quietly, But you want a family and I don't have a family. If you want we could be a family, she offered though would understand should Ana say no. Rory also offered her experience with her own heat. Oksana turned her head to look at her friend as she spoke of it not getting that bad. Then her gaze returned to Ana when she spoke of it being different for everyone. Is there a way to know how bad it will be? She asked the women. Frankly Oksana was a little scared to experience a heat after what she'd heard and seen from others.

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She listened when Ana spoke, mentioning how she was afraid she would do something she would regret with the season heavy on them and she completely understood the dilemma that the woman was going through. It was hard, trying to be understanding to the rules of the pack and neglecting the urges of your own needs but she respected the fact that Ana was so loyal to Lachesis and Lilya and smart enough to respect their wishes. It was wise for all of them to do what was in the best interest of everyone, even if it did hurt. "I'm sorry Ana..." she offered her, even though she knew that it wouldn't do much good to help her out. It was the most she could offer considering that she was dealing with her own problems this season. She couldn't help but smile when Oksana offered to be the pale woman's family and without thinking she too eased in closer to Ana, wanting her to know that she was here for her if she needed her. They were a family and would get through every issue together. "Not that I know Oksana, you just gotta hope it doesn't hit you hard. But you don't have to worry about that for a little while yet..." she expressed to her, leaning into the young girl with another smile. She had at least until she was nearly two before she'd be hit with this burden. "Hopefully by then we'll all get what we're looking for." she said, eyeing Ana before growing silent. Rory wasn't necessarily desiring a family but she did like the idea of someone to distract her and make her feel whole once more.

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A very subtle nod escaped her, acknowledging that emotions would no doubt get the best of her if she wasn't careful. Her fear of breaking pack law was strong as well as her desire to satiate said desires - she knew that she could not bow to one so she must refrain from partaking in any activity that made her move from this location. Sana was quick to extend an olive branch to her but suggestin that she be a part of Ana's family and the dove closed her eyes and sighed wistfully. Thank you, Sana. Because she would be there for the dark raven if need be but there was also the light in the darkness. I will look after you, Sana, and you, Rory, as you both are family so long as you are a member of the Surge. I look after my own.

Anastasia didn't want to be looking to adopt the raven in any fashion for Inna was as suitable a mother as any aside from the fact that she was out on her own trying to give Sana space. The dove simply could not weasel her way into that spot even if there was a barrier between mother and daughter. Don't fret on it, too hard, Sana. While being in heat certainly affected the china doll in a manner of heightened emotions, being able to guide Sana through it had eased her worries quite a bit.

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Ana’s nod was enough confirmation that what her mother has said was true. That when her tone came she would have to control whatever her emotions were when her heat came on. Her head turned toward Rory as she told Ana that she was sorry for her plight. When the pale woman spoke of wanting a family Oksana knew she meant to have her own children. She also had heard the rule that Lachesis and Lilya had set in place even if it didn't mean anything to her. She didn't even have to think about the offer that she'd made. She wanted a family too so why couldn't she and Ana be a family? Rory moved closer and Oksana reached out to lick her cheek before doing the same to Ana, We’re all family and look out for each other, she said solidifying what Ana said in her mind and looking between the two women. What the pale woman said put something into perspective for the crow. Rory spoke next saying she didn't know how Oksana's heat would affect her but she didn't have to worry just yet. Ana spoke too saying not to worry, I won't, she promised, And when it is time I'll have the two of you to help me through it. She gave Ana a nudge at the darker woman's next words, Hopefully we will, she agreed but it did bring to question what it was that Rory might want. Are you looking for something too Rory? She asked the Thanne woman.

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i don't even know if i believe

Aurora Thanne

She smiled, a feeling of happiness overcoming her. She couldn't explain the amount of emotion she felt for gaining a family, wolves she could really bond with and count on and discussing this problem with Anastasia was a huge step in the healing process for Rory. This meeting meant that she had others to rely on if she had an issue or felt sad, and in return she hoped to give as much of herself that she could regardless of how awkward. Anastasia was a smart wolf and she could understand the dilemma she found herself in, it was always had choosing between creating a family or minding the rules and it seemed that the pale woman had followed the rules for practically most of her life. She could definitely understand her urge to want to create life when so many new puppies were expected to appear come Spring, even if Rory herself wasn't ready. She looked toward Oksana with a smile, ears falling backward on her skull when she recalled the question over and over again in her head--what was she looking for. She opened her mouth a moment but nothing came forth, shaking her head she looked down to her paws and sighed before finally she had come up with enough reason to respond. "Unconditional love and trust." she said, satisfied with the answer. It wasn't too much to ask for, the request was simple and at this point she didn't know if she would ever receive it or not, especially when she was already debating on whether the man she cared so much about still cared.

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