You must go where I cannot

OH HALLO AGAIN

In the amber light of dawn Mercy awoke to find that his travel companion was still sleeping peacefully. He knew they had quite a journey ahead of them- not only to the mountain, but to wherever their lives took them- and so, after placing a soft kiss on her forehead, he sauntered soberly toward the cave's entrance and out into the light. Even though it was early in the morning it was warm and he felt the sun's rays caress and sink into his dark fur like water into a sponge as he stretched, pulling his muscles and warming them up before he set out at an easy walk. He needed to find something for him and Aponi to eat; it seemed like this had become the story of his life, and though he had promised Crowe that he would be a good guardian, he couldn't give up on his trade as a hunter. And, in essence, he was still being a guardian- he was being a damn good guardian. He was keeping Aponi safe, and was now on his way to get her food.

He snuffled around in the woodlands and found himself drawn toward the grotto where he hoped he might be able to do some fishing. Perhaps a rabbit might come for a drink, as well- sources of water were surely good places to look for prey. The crowchild knelt at the water's edge and gazed in, hoping to spy some form of movement- the silver, glistening scales of fish, even the brown of a catfish, though they tasted a bit like mud. His tail twitched from side to side as he waited and watched, focusing his attention on the water's surface without realizing that it had become so hypnotizing that he'd begun to let his guard down.

OH, IT'S YOU, IMAGINE THAT.

The Silver Dagger had been the one to teach the Crowchild how to track down prey, so it had been easy for her to track her son- and Aponi both- to Bramble Falls, especially as she'd been told by Naira that that was where she could find them. She hadn't told anyone where she was going or what her intentions were. She knew that Karpos had been told to find Aponi, but that he'd refused to do so and was now excommunicated from the pack. She secretly hoped that she'd stumble across the boy so she could give the once innocent, sweet boy a good flogging; it was because of him that Aponi had run off, and since she'd run, Mercy had as well. It put a sour taste in her mouth. But her priority wasn't to beat up a child- it was to find two of them and drag them back to Hollowheart Keep.

She found the cave they'd sheltered in soon enough, and had poked her head inside to see Aponi, sleeping by herself. Mercy's scent was fresh enough, though, that it meant he hadn't gone far. She sighed softly, and started after him. He was taking his role as Aponi's guardian too seriously, and she worried that he might become too attached. She looked up to the sky for a moment and shook her head. If this was her punishment for mating with Rhysis...She knew she deserved it, but this sort of punishment was almost too cruel.

She spotted her son's hunched hindquarters near the grotto and she approached, surprised he didn't hear her coming or respond to her. This disappointed her; if he was going to survive in the wild, he couldn't let his guard down. So, with the intention of teaching her son a lesson, she snuck forward, crouched, and after a few useless butt wiggles, she darted forward and pounced her son.

<.< THAT WASN'T VERY NICE.

Nothing, nothing, nothing. He stared at the water and saw no signs of life in it, but found that he enjoyed watching the ripples move across the surface. He was distracted by a water bug, one of those ones with four legs- despite the fact that it was an insect and should therefore have six- that could skitter across the surface without sinking in. There were a few of them and he watched as they glided on the water as though it was ice. He wondered what it would be like, to walk on water like that- and wondered if they could walk on land at all. Their legs were long, but they were quite spindly and he doubted they'd be able to go very fast on them. He watched as two collided and investigated each other with their short head antennae, and was about to exhale at the with the intention of sending them skittering across the water's surface when instead he found himself being thrown arse over tea kettle into the water and sending the water bugs off on a miniature tidal wave- no doubt the surf ride of their lives.

He coughed and spluttered and flailed as he tried to get his feet beneath him and snap at whoever it was who'd forcefully knocked him into the water, but accidentally bit onto a stick instead. Still, he bit down hard enough to crack the stick in half- if that would make a point at all, and shook his head so he could get a better look at his attacker- and dropped the stick, in two halves, back into the water.

He was in trouble now.

Sagacity landed just short of her son and had intentionally done so, so that she could lower her head and give him a good, sound headbutt, sending him flying into the water. She lifted her head proudly and watched as he went belly-up into the water and flailed helplessly as he tried to get his feet underneath him, and latched onto the closest thing- a stick. She was somewhat impressed, though, that he'd wanted to bite so hard- if it had been her leg he would have done some serious damage. She stayed on the bank and settled down onto her haunches, giving him an austere stare when he finally shook the water out of his eyes and realized who it was that had found him. He said nothing, but was obviously dumbstruck. She tapped her tail on the ground disappointedly.

"You're going to dry yourself off, and then you and Aponi are going to march straight back to the Keep." She said, and the tone of her voice was that of a mom who had had just enough of this bullshit. "Karpos was exiled; so no matter what went on between you and Aponi and him, it doesn't matter; he's gone." She said. She gritted her teeth and growled softly for a moment, reminding herself to be somewhat civil. But that idea went out the window pretty darn quickly. "I'm ashamed of you, Mercy. Running off like an idiot; how could you do that? And Aponi's no better- you're both too weak to be out on your own, and just because some idiot kit said something mean?" She asked, and hissed. "You're better than that."

At first, as he sat in the cold water and shivered slightly, he felt guilty and silly. He knew he and Aponi shouldn't have run off, and they shouldn't have run off just because of something that Karpos had said. It was foolish, especially given the condition that they were in. But he didn't like hearing it. He wouldn't have been able to take those words from anyone, save perhaps for Crowe, but Crowe was gone. The more his mother spoke, the more he felt that she was being condescending, and treating him like a child. His lips pursed and his ears flattened as she continued to speak, finally confessing that she was ashamed of him. That was the straw that broke his back, and he knew right then and there that he couldn't go back to the Keep with her; she was smothering him.

"We're not going back to the Keep with you." He answered in as low a voice as he could manage. He tried to keep the cold from effecting his voice, even though his jaw trembled slightly. "You're right, we're better than that. Aponi is the heir to Nomad's Pass. We're going back to the mountain," He said defiantly and lifted his head slightly. If he and Aponi were going to reclaim the mountain, then that would make him of a higher rank than his mother. His temper and pride clouded his vision, making it impossible for him to see the fault in what he was saying.

She did not like the arrogance she saw in her son's eyes, and she snarled viciously when he raised his head, as though to show his dominance when he proclaimed that Aponi was the heir to the mountain. She was one of Naira's most devoted followers but even Sagacity didn't believe that Naira's hold on the mountain would be permanent, or something that could simply be handed down to her daughter. Furthermore, they'd relinquished their hold on the mountain when they'd left, though her son seemed oblivious to this pack.

"The mountain belongs to no one, and it never will belong to anyone. It can't be inherited like some heirloom." She spat. "Certainly not by some brat who runs off as soon as their feelings are hurt. There's no metal in her bones, Mercy. There's no acid in her veins. You're not following a queen, you're chasing a stupid dram that will starve you of everything you have." She said. She needed to convince him not to stay with Aponi...She couldn't tell him the truth, because she knew it would never stay a secret if she did. "Think about it, Mercy. You almost died trying to take care of her, and you're still weak enough to be flipped like a duckling," She said, and knew she made a good point. She set her jaw and stared at him again, daring him to be bold enough to challenged her once more. "You'll die. Both of you. Slow, painful deaths." She said.

His mother's words stung him like nettles, and he finally turned his gaze away stubbornly. He gritted his teeth to keep from snapping at her, but he couldn't help but feel his heartstrings pulled by the words she said. His mother was right; they were too weak to be out on their own now...But if he and Aponi could find somewhere to live, maybe join another pack until they were older, stronger, maybe had a bit of a following so that they could found their own pack...It could work. They could do it. It would take time, but they could find a way to survive until they were both strong enough to lead a pack of their own.

He hated hearing what his mother said about Aponi, and he shook his head in denial. "That's not true. You don't know who she is now." He said, even though the point she'd made about Aponi taking too much offense from what Karpos had said was a very valid point. A princess and heir shouldn't have believed what Karpos had said, she should have challenged him or put him in his place, or ignored him. It was the one point that would stick with Mercy, but it wasn't enough to make him bow to his mother and agree to go back with her.

"I'm not going back." He said. And he raised his eyes to meet hers once more. "Even if I starve."

"I'm not going back. Even if I starve."She stared at her son for a moment, straight into those steely, silver-blue eyes. It was exactly as though she was staring straight into the eyes of his father, and she felt herself weaken. Her son was stronger than she'd ever been. She'd joined the pack by seducing the alpha male, who had then awakened life within her- life that she'd had to hide and lie about in order to save her skin. She stole from the weak, bullied the meek, lied, tricked, cowered. Had she ever stood up for something real in her life? Or had she just become a pawn in someone else's chess game? She'd never stepped off the board. She'd never moved in the wrong direction. And here was her son, who'd chosen to wear a cloak of a different colour even if it meant his death. A breath seethed through her lips.

"You have no idea what you're saying." She said. But he did- he'd been near to death before, as she never had. He'd nearly starved while trying to take care of Aponi but he hadn't abandoned her, as he could have, in order to save his own life. He would have made it back to the Keep in much better condition had he left her behind, but he hadn't. She stood up. "She's not good for you, Mercy. She's poisoned you." She said. She wanted to say You're not my son anymore, but couldn't bring herself to do it. He was her son; and she wanted to tell him now, maybe even just to disgust him if he had feelings for Aponi- but she was too selfish to do so. It would likely mean her life.

"I know exactly what I'm saying. And I mean it." He said, and stood up with conviction even though he was dripping wet. He wasn't petty enough to shake off right then and there, though the thought of dousing his mother with water did intrigue him. She made another comment, but he simply lifted his head, knowing that his mother was giving up and giving in. He was winning. He was too proud to realize how odd this was, and that there must have been some reason for her to give in so easily- but he didn't care. He was young, proud and foolish, and wouldn't lose to her. Not when he was so far ahead and was looking forward to his own glorious future.

He stepped closer to his mother and gazed at her levelly, unafraid to do so. He'd gained so much, now, and felt himself becoming the prince he should have been- the prince he was by birthright, even though he had no idea that this was true. "She hasn't poisoned me." He said. "She saved me." He said. Aponi had awakened him from his passive, meek self, and had turned him into a guardian. She'd turned him into what Crowe had wanted him to be. His mother had trained him as a hunter, and had wanted him to be a scout like her, but he wouldn't do it. He wouldn't be like her. "Goodbye," He said, simply, and after one last look, he brushed past her and strode off to find Aponi and begin their journey together.

And with that, he left and she lost all chances of bringing him back. She knew she could overpower him, and she likely even had the strength to drag him all the way back to Hollowheart Keep just out of spite even if he was dripping wet. But she couldn't keep him there and she knew he'd never stop running if she didn't let him go. Either way, she was losing her baby boy because she was too cowardly to tell him the truth, and because she didn't have the skill to reason with him. She'd never been a reasonable wolf, and had always resorted to physical means- or simply leaving- to fix any confrontation that cropped up. Her son brushed past her, leaving a bit of water hanging to her guard hairs as she stood there, staring into the water jus as he'd been doing before she'd pushed him in.

She'd lost her son. She didn't know if he was going to the mountain and even if he did, if he would survive once he was there. A lone wolf could kill them both, they could starve, they could get attacked by a cougar...There were so many dangers, and her son was not afraid to face them. He would rather face a likely death than live with her in the pack and this stung like nothing else had ever hurt her before. She moved closer to the water's edge, looked at her reflection, and crumpled to the ground in a useless heap, unable to deal with the grief she felt knowing she would likely never see her son again.