Even through the pain, she could hear her Mama's voice, comforting and loving. Mama was proud? Truly? And not just because she wasn't gonna make it through the day? Ophelia' tail swished weakly behind her and she tried to smile, but the pull of muscles left her face screaming and her expression crumpled. Everything hurt. Smiling, laughing, talking, sniffing, breathing. It all brought with it some manner of agony and the pale princess had begun living by what hurt the least or what was worth the pain.
Letting her family know how much she loved them, how sorry she was for being so awful... That was important. She didn't want to go with them thinking her a good riddance of a selfish, spoiled brat. She wanted it to matter. To make a difference. Even if it didn't make a difference at all. Nothing good was coming of her death. It was unfair, really. She wanted to live. She wanted to live and she was afraid of what came after! What if it was only darkness? What if she was alone? What if it was worse than this?
Hearing her father's voice near her ear, she wanted to sob. She was a disappointment for him. She was supposed to follow in his pawsteps. Rise to be a good leader. She'd let him down. Not on purpose, but there was no chance of that now. Ophelia longed to urge him to stay strong. Strong enough until another could rise to take his place and carry on his legacy. Maybe Felix would return and maybe he would lead instead. She wanted to laugh as she thought of him, grown, still upending rocks to find the best bugs. Ophelia longed to spend the day hunting for big buggies for him to come home to.
At Veho's bidding, Ophelia gingerly took the stalks of ergot in her mouth. They caught between her teeth and she couldn't re-position them well enough in her mouth without causing even minimal pressure on the roof of her mouth. Her palate felt mushier than it should, degrading with the presence of furious infection. The yearling whined, unable to get the herbs down. That protest was costly enough that she felt silent with the ergot still held between her teeth. Tenderly, Ophelia turned her head and let the ergot fall free.
"Killed him," she managed. It was too much to say that whoever he was, he wanted to hurt Pip. Too much to say that the look in his eyes said he wanted to hurt more than just Pip. "Not for nothing," she decided. Her life would not be forfeit in vain. It was for a cause. For Pip. For pack. For any others who would have been at that monster's mercy.
And she was cold, Ophelia realized. Despite the warmth of the day, she was freezing. Her limbs trembled violently from both exertion as well as whatever the source of the chill was, though her face still felt as on fire now as it had the very moment it had been torn into. "Just lay," she whimpered, begging, pleading to those around her. Mama. Daddy. Even the female hovering on the edge. If they would all just lay with her, maybe it wouldn't be so cold. Maybe it wouldn't hurt so much.
Ophelia couldn't help but wonder. Just how long did it take to die?