Secret Woodlands That Heaven is overrated

(I will get responses up ASAP. Perhaps a few packmates to comfort her about her sisters disappearance)

Tell me did you sail across the sun, Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded, And that heaven is overrated...

Ashanti was collecting herbs near the herbal storage, wallowing in her sorrows brought to the world weary flesh of the young girl. Though she was still a yearling, she had matured so much in the past month or two. Ever since the pack started to get together. She started taking more responsibilities and she did everything she could to be the best that she could. She was always affected by her sister. Isen had sworn never to leave her again, that promise shattered as she had not been seen in a month. She didn't always have common sense, so she thought she was reacting harsh when she said she'd hate her sister until the day she died.

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star, One without a permanent scar, And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there...

She let out a long, pain filled howl. A howl to see if her sister would hear, if her sister could come back to her like she always did. She only had her sister, that was all she had from the moment she was born to the moment she had to go off by herself. Then she met Nina, Sloane, Kashikoi, Ruiko. Funny how life worked, one betrayal after another. Ruiko left them, Kashi thought he was worth nothing. Nina and Sloane stayed strong as they looked ahead in a gaze.

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet, Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day, And head back to the milky way....

Her howl cut off and she collapsed to the ground. She needed to stay strong, but it was just too hard. Isen, you broke all your promises. You promised to meet me so I wouldn't have to go alone. You promised never to leave me when you found me. Your gone again, don't even come back. Don't ever ever come back. She thought to herself, her head buried under her paws. Hiding as much of her head as she could.

(This post was last modified: Feb 11, 2013, 06:28 AM by Ashanti.)

Sloane was relaxing for the moment. He'd attempted to hunt this morning with little luck. He wasn't too worried, having much faith in the swifter members of the pack to catch the smaller game, but that didn't meant that he would stop trying. The relatively dense underbrush gave the vermin too easy an escape from a wolf his size. He needed more open spaces to be more productive. Perhaps later he would try his luck closer to the outskirts of the borders, where the thickets thinned a bit. His over-sized form lay sphinx-like, drinking in the warm rays of the sun, even as his breath frosted before him.

His golden amber eyes were getting heavy and slowly drifting closed when a howl rent the air nearby. He thought it might be Ashanti, but he was still learning the different calls of his new pack mates and couldn't be sure. The howl was so filled with sadness and despair that the fur on the back of his neck prickled and his heart broke for her. It was a call to return to her. It had to be Ashanti calling for Isen. Her sister had pledged to join the pack and then had simply vanished. Ashanti had dove into her work and perhaps he sorrow was part of the reason why. It wouldn't be the first time duty had dulled a heartache.

He was drawn to her call. She needed someone and he couldn't let her wade in her pain alone. She was a pack mate. Family now. So he rose to his feet smoothly and followed the last traces as her howl faded into the trees and thickets. The sound died away, but he easily tracked her path once he was close enough until he saw her crumpled on the ground, white fur blending in with the layer of snow coating it. Her head was tucked under her paws as is she was hiding from her sadness. He quietly padded over to her, gently nudging her shoulder and asked, "Ashanti? Are you all right?' His deep voice was filled with compassion as his amber gaze fell on her.

Knight of Honor

Ashanti glanced up to see her pack leader there, he must have heard her howl for her sister. If Sloane had noticed, others must have to and that was not something she wanted. Ashanti? Are you all right? The compassionate voice asked, it was calm and steady. She looked at him, as if he was asking whether or not she was a healer. "She promised never to leave me again. I-I don't understand. Before I left, she was so nice and kind, she never let anything happen to me. She risked her life to save me from my aunt. But now, now she's gone. she broken all her promises. The ones that I knew her to always keep." She whimpered. She was clearly upset.

She wondered why her sister left. Her sister had made commitments to her and the pack she promised to be in. Why would Isen leave without a word. "What if she didn't leave Sloane. That's what I keep asking myself. What if something happened to her? What if we turned our backs to someone who we thought abandoned us when in truth she needs our help more then ever. I know my sister, she wouldn't have left without saying something first." She whispered, just loud enough for those around to hear. Just loud enough for Sloane to hear.

All that was in her head was that she had a sister, her sister was gone, and that she though something happened to her. It saddened her that she could not search for her. Why couldn't she search for her? If she got an alpahs permission.... no, she wouldn't be able to find her way back home. This place was home now.

The cold winter breeze blew gently in silent witness as Ashanti poured out her heart about her sister. She wondered how she could break her promises after sacrificing herself for Ashanti and he didn't know what to say to the girl to comfort her. Then she went on, wondering if something terrible had happened to her sister to keep her away and his heart wept for her. He was at a loss as to how to make it better for her . Had it been Narime', there would have been no hesitation. He would have curled up around her and found the right thing to say.

He had never run into a situation quite like this, at least where the wounds were still fresh and raw. It had been made worse by the sisters actually reuniting. Then Isen was gone. Perhaps Ashanti would have been better off never having seen her sister again. She had seemed content enough prior to that, but to have the old wound ripped open and bleeding once more must truly be terrible. The over-sized male struggled to find the right words to help get her through this, but he vowed to help her in any way that he could. She was family now. Like a daughter or a sister.

He lay down facing her, so that they could look each other in the eye as they spoke. He hoped fervently that he didn't make it worse, somehow... His bright amber eyes were filled with emotion as he spoke. "I wish that I had the answers for you about Isen. I can only hope that nothing bad has happened to her and that she is safe wherever she is." He paused for a moment, his brows furrowed slightly. "I don't know why she left, if indeed she did, but I'm sure that she had a good reason. There is hope yet that she may return, Ashanti. Please don't despair," he implored. He wished that he could take her pain and uncertainty away, but unfortunately sometimes, many times, life was simply cruel and unfair.

Knight of Honor

Ashanti sighed, she had expected that much, no one could help her with her personal problems. This was pack life, but it seemed lonely to her. "Sloane, what if she comes back? What if she comes back injured, what if she comes back and Nina won't accept her? What if no one will accept her. Part of me wants to go search for her, like she did fore me. But part of me is telling me to stay here, where I'm needed, where I belong." She told him her confused emotions in the order they occurred, her thoughts then her fears then her lust and wants. What if Isen's good reason wasn't good enough. What if she was gone. or collapsed somewhere, calling for Ashanti when Ashanti herself couldn't hear her sister. These thoughts kept her up at night, they left her defenseless against the winter sicknesses that feasted and manifested themselves on those who were sleep deprived. She was more vulnerable then ever.

"Sloane, if you were to meet her along the borders one day, and she wanted to be back here. Would you take her in? Would you allow her to stay?" She asked after calming herself down, her sobs down to being soft, then fading away with only emotional scars, her eyes and voice full of sadness. She wondered who would be sane enough to let her back in, Isen had a reason, Ashanti didn't know, but Isen had to have a reason. It's impossible for my aunt to have tracked Isen or I out here right? We're safe from her right? What if we're not all that safe?

The over-sized russet male felt for the girl. He was her leader, yet he felt like he had no answers for her. At least not the ones that she wanted. He listened intently and considered his words carefully once more. "Ashanti, I cannot speak for Nina, but if Isen had a good reason for being away, I'm sure that she would take it into consideration, as would I. Neither of us would want to separate family. Blood is a strong bond, but remember that we are your family too now." He didn't want her to feel as is she had nothing without Isen here. They all cared about her here and wanted her to be happy.

He paused before addressing her desire to look for her sister. Heaven only knew that he was glad that Tempest and Sloane had searched for him, but at this point Ashanti and Isen's case was a bit different. "I know what it's like to lose family. I lost much of mine to death and many others to the unknown, but I have found a new family here in the Lore as well. Isen knows where you are and if she is willing and able, she will come back here to search for you. If you leave then you may never reunite again. There is no guarantee either way, so you must make your choice with your heart. I cannot speak for others with certainty, but I would be saddened to see you go, Ashanti." The compassion and honesty in his voice was hard to miss and he did mean what he said. He would never want her to leave the home that she had here in the Thickets with Nina and the others.

Knight of Honor

Ashanti listened to him as he spoke, she felt so alone, like she needed to find Isen to be whole once more. "I just feel so alone right now, like the world around me is caving in. I know my family is here too. But I worry that my aunt has found her. I know she would try and get back, but what if she has traveled on to Aranna? What if my aunt found her and spilled her blood. I feel as if it's my duty as a healer to find my sister. I'm just confused." She whispered, her heart ached with the emotions that made her suffer. Her heart had something else, though she wasn't quite sure that it was ache. It confused her, she'd never felt this way before. She wondered what it could be, was it just the warrior's nice and kind behavior with the hints of compassion, or was it just him. She had never really gotten to know Sloane, she always hung with Nina, learning over the healers shoulder.

She thought about it, her white fur remaining as it was, she changed no appearance on the out side other then a more relaxed feeling. She was warming up to having Sloane as her leader. She felt more relaxed around all her packmates. She wondered why she had been so tense around Sloane before, after all she had been tense around all her male packmates. She didn't know many of them at all, she knew a few a little bit.

Sloane's brows furrowed slightly at Ashanti's continued distress. As he looked at her, trying to find the right words to say the winter wind gently blew hew white fur and he couldn't help the though that she was a lovely girl with so much ahead of her and yet she was so torn inside. Her dilemma was legitimate. Go and search for her sister or stay and live her new life never knowing what happened to Isen. Of course, that was quite possibly the case either way. He looked at her, golden amber eyes dark and serious. "Ashanti, you must do what your heart tells you to do. Family is important and I commend you for your concern for Isen."

He wasn't sure what else to say. If she left, Nina would not likely take it well and he couldn't say whether or not she would take her back one day. Ashanti had a home here, but if she left there was no guarantee that it would always be here. The choice would soon be out of his hands for his time as leader in the Secret Woodlands pack was coming to a close. He knew a part of his heart would always remain here with these wolves though, no matter how far away he may settle with his love.

"Ashanti, I know that you have a tough choice to make but please promise me two things. First, talk to Nina. Let her know what's on your mind as you have with me. She may have more wisdom to offer than I. If you do decide to go searching she must know before you leave. If you just disappear, you won't likely be given the opportunity to return. Second, remember that I am always here for you, even when I am no longer your alpha, I will always be your friend. As will the rest of your new family." He felt that he had spoken enough for the moment so he lapsed into silence as she absorbed all of it.

Knight of Honor

Ashanti sighed; Sloane’s words gave her no comfort or feeling of self-worth. “I promise I will talk to Nina. But… I need time to think. I cannot think of anything that will get me out of my situation.” She said, and then he spoke of being her friend and always being there for her. She smiled a bit at that. “Thank you Sloane.” She said, she needed a way to calm herself down and get her mind off of it.“I need to keep my mind off of this for a bit, perhaps we could go hunting? Fill the caches a bit more?” She said, she liked being around Sloane now. She thought back, remembering Rais and how she basically drove him to insanity. How she did the same to Valiant. Though she was sure they had forgotten of her existence. Time was a powerful thing, but not to those who set fire to the rain.

She had her tail still flat up against her belly. She was curious to what Sloane had meant by ‘even when I am no longer your alpha.’ She had no knowledge of Koda and Nina being mates, as far as she knew, Sloane was her best friend and they were leading, she did not enter the personal lives of her alphas. Yet she always wondered about them. Her ears were lowered to her skull. She always avoided his eyes. She knew soon she would be claiming the official title as healer and she would learn under Nina. But for now, she was stuck on one fact. What was she feeling and why did it only show up when she talked to Sloane? Was this love? No, she could not love her alpha; it went against every natural law of wolves that she knew. She felt trampy just by thinking that she might have feelings for him.

(This post was last modified: Feb 19, 2013, 05:16 PM by Ashanti.)

He was sad that his words did not seem to help. Or at least not much. Her situation was a complicated one and there was truly no right or wrong answer. If she left to search for her sister, she might find her or she might never find her. If she remained in the pack, she would always have to live with the 'what ifs' that would surely plague her from time to time. Of course, there still was the chance that Isen might turn back up here in the Thickets. It was a gamble of the heart, either way.

Although he didn't feel that he'd helped all that much, she seemed grateful for his ear and perhaps for now, that was enough. In an effort to get her mind off of her emotional roller coaster, she asked if he would like to hunt with her and he gave her a big smile. He might not have all of the answers, but distraction he could do! He was also always up for a hunt and his time in the Thickets grew short. He had told them in the beginning that Koda would take his place by Nina's side and he could only pray that the golden eyed male was well and up for the task!

He gave Ashanti a smile and said, "It would be my pleasure! Perhaps outside of the Thicket? Blackberry Fields, perhaps?" Although he had grown to love each and every wolf here, he would not be upset to leave the Thickets behind. A wolf of his immense dimensions and the dense underbrush, with all of it's twists and turns were simply not a good match. Waiting for her approval, he then turned and led the way eastward towards Blackberry Fields.


(Exit Sloane! I think that we can go ahead and archive unless you wish to make another post. Then we can start the hunting thread in Blackberry Fields that will turn into a scuffle with Nari, if that sounds good to you!)

Knight of Honor