Speaking of which she remembered suddenly that she was out of her den for a reason rather than to mope. So the she wolf began to search out some herbs almost aimlessly. Her coat, matted, and dull, hung on every little thorn it could find while her eyes still hadn't adjusted to sunlight for she spent days in her cave. Simaea only left anymore to relieve herself, it was beyond evident to her that no one cared she was never outside. Of course no one cared, why should they, after all Minka was respected second and Simaea was nothing but the healer. The bitch healer that couldn't conduct herself properly, and couldn't keep friends. Her head hung low and she stopped even searching for herbs and once more flopped onto her stomach and stared at nothing. I'm worthless.
Titan was on his way back from his meeting with the gray loner Lyr. He held a large yellow red sycamore leaf folded in half by the ends as the child padded into the cave. Pausing at the entrance to let his eyes adjust to the darkness, Titan readjusted his grip making sure he didn't touch any of the yellow arnica plants that he and the gray stranger had put together inside of the folded sycamore leaf. He still remembered the womans dark words. How eating the plant would make your insides bleed dry. Basically I would die... Titan had an idea of what death was after seeing live animals in the meadow. The same dead animals that his mother would bring the Thorben siblings to eat. How he saw it was that you slept forever, and Titan did not want to sleep forever. He wanted to run around and play with his friends and family. So the child was very careful not to ingest or even lick the yellow flowers that he carried.
The raven childs blue orbs peered into the darkness. He would have to find Simaea who hid somewhere within the cave. All in all it took the young Thorben about 20 minutes to locate the depressed healer. She didn't even seem to notice his arrival. Setting down his precious load of plants Titan picked his head back up and cocked it sideways looking at the dark lady.
"You are nurse Simaea right?" His mother had told him of the woman before. However the dark child could not remember meeting her formally. He was too young to remember the time she'd helped him into the world.
"I brought you a present! It will help anyone who's hurt right?" He pushed forward the sycamore leaf which opened to reveal the many yellow flowering plants he had carefully pulled from the field of dried fire flowers. "Lyr told me that you would like this..uh..mm..mmm arn..arnica plant.?" He piped up a third time trying to get the dark ladies attention. All he wanted was to be of use. To be given an approving look or a thank you. Just like mens working dogs the young wolf shared that wanting to serve his pack.
Accept no defeat, surrender retreat...
But when Titan nosed open the leaf, and the Arnica was exposed Simaea almost flew into a fit of rage. What fool would give Arnica to a pup? Even just to carry, it was insanely dangerous! She stood quickly and pawed the package towards herself, took a deep breath and explained to the pup very calmly. "Titan, while I appreciate this greatly, for it can be useful one day in an emergency, this Arnica can also kill you. I f you eat even the tiniest bit, it could cause you to bleed inside. I don't want that for you, so next time a stranger gives you herbs, call for me first." Carefully she folded the herb back into it's leaf wrap and tucked it away so that it would be safe from any more curious pups with peculiar appetites.
"But...I already knew that! Lyr told me already! I know that it could make me sleep forever not knowing anything. I know that already. That it can kill me. Still... Lots of family were sick or hurt recently. I wanted to help them get better in any way possible. I tried to be safe, and I'm not dead now am I?!" His last words came out as a snarl while the hurt built up in his chest. Then Titan, knowing he'd just done something wrong by yelling at an adult, turned away shamefully while kicking at the earthen floor.
Why couldn't he help out the adults more?
Accept no defeat, surrender retreat...
Simaea shook her head for a moment to rid herself of such gruesome thoughts. For now the she wolf was fighting of the grip of depression that was threatening to squeeze the life out of her. For the sake of this pup she must appear okay. "I am not disappointed in you Titan. I just worry about your safety for I saw the three of you into this world, and I do not wish to see you go back out." She gave the pup a good Natured smile hoping that he would understand he had done nothing wrong. But merely that she was just worried that he could have been hurt. "Now just think what your mother and father would do if I went and let you get hurt. I think they'd have both of our tails!"
Titan noted a smile on the healers lips while looking at him. It made sense to him that the lady who had helped him live so far didn't want to see him get hurt. It was the same problem with his mother. Protection was good but Titan saw the adults actions as being too overprotective. Nobody would let him do anything, learn anything on his own. I wish I would grow up already so they can stop worrying about me... Titan huffed quietly in his head.
"Now just think what your mother and father would do if I went and let you get hurt. I think they'd have both of our tails!"
Simaea's rasping voice grated upon his nerves.
"They would probably yell at you a lot... and I would get a nip on the nose..." Titan remembered when his mother had nipped his nose for trying to drink milk long after he was supposed to be weaned onto meat. Though he couldn't see what the problem was at the time.
Still looking at the sickly sweet smelling herbs, Titan sighed feeling his anger beginning to ebb. What was done was done, and the child couldn't do anything about it for now. He couldn't force himself to grow up any faster than the boy already was. But I can train and learn more so that they won't have to punish me again. His thoughts were logical. The more the young Thorben learned and grew the less often he would get into trouble.
"What other plants do you have that shouldn't be touched or picked up?" He asked quietly stealing a side glance towards the dark woman. Would she show him or simply turn the child away?
Accept no defeat, surrender retreat...
"Amanita muscaria." She began gesturing to the first. "Nightshade." She gestured to the second. "Finally Cowbane, now there are others that could hurt you but to my knowledge the only one that kills and cures is Arnica. I've heard of others that can make you extremely ill, But these three WILL kill you. That is their purpose, death." As much Simaea wanted to shield the young from some things, this was not one, they all deserved all the knowledge she could give. Even if it was terrifying to think of a plant as killing a wolf.
Honestly Simaea kept them around for scary reasons anyways. In case she needed them, Simaea knew if she ever had to then she could put a wolf with distemper or rabies out of it's misery. Even one of her own pack mates. Even herself if it came to it, sometimes even being a healer was risky.
"Does that mean if wolves eat too many berries of the plants they'll die too?" This question was posed more innocently as the child didn't know the exact difference between normal plants and herbs yet.
His dark blue gaze watched the healer move towards the herb piles that littered the small crevices of her den inside the cave. The young Thorben's tail stuck out stiffly as he watched a few piles of herbs taken out. Herbs that Simaea explained would absolutely kill a wolf. Dark black ears lay back upon the young regal pup's crown as he observed from a safe distance.
He leaned forward to look closer at the first plant the brown she wolf gestured to. Nightshade... The name was cool enough but just looking at the plant and knowing that it could kill a wolf so easily made the youth shiver. He admired the few dried flowers leftover for a moment unsure as to what color they were supposed to be either pink,white, pinkish white or purply pink.. Next he scented the herb wrinkling his black muzzle at the smell. It was definitely something he could remember even if he didn't know the exact color of the flowers. Then Titan tilted his head and gazed at the bright berries that glistened a blackish blue. Oh yeah... He was definitely not going to eat berries ever again.
"Nightshade...nightshade, nightshade, nightshade, nightshade...arnica...then that's nightshade..." The child viewed the plant and scented it at the same time while repeating the name of the killers. He went over the yellow flowered arnica just to make sure he remembered that on too.
The next plant Simaea went over Titan leaned in once more to listen. His dark blue orbs took in the sight of this strange plant quickly looking over every difference between it and the nightshade. Then he compared it to the arnica.
Most of the pieces of cowbane had smooth purple striped stems that branched quickly to leaves or flowers. The alternate tripinnate leaves were coarsely toothed,long, and thin. Flicking his gaze to the beautiful flowers Titan held himself stiffly in order not to fall forward onto the deadly thing. The flowers were small and white. They inhabited round clusters at the top of the stem like an umbrella.
Lastly Titan scented this plant. It had a much nicer smell compared to the nightshade and a slightly sweeter scent than the arnica. Had he not known better Titan probably would have rolled around in a field of this plant with the nice smell. "I can't believe plants like these can kill someone... Why is it they do that? Are they just poisonous like snakes?" He had remembered a warning from someone within the pack. That the long thin scaly things with no legs could be very dangerous. That they could poison and hurt you if you were bitten by them.
Accept no defeat, surrender retreat...
Then of course there was the.. other reason that they were around. Simaea needed the solace of having a way out if things got too bad. But it was not a thought for the head of a pup. Insteadshe told him the first, "You see Titan, there are ailments and pains, that I cannot cure. Sometimes wolves need to rest, it would ease their pin and help them to the inevitable end. So that they wouldn't hurt, as evil as a poisonous plant may seem, it can be used for good" Of course Simaea was very sure most wolves would see something that's soul purpose is death as completely evil and nothing else. It may be a product of her past, but the healer knew, death was an inevitable end and a tool for healing. For when you were dead, you hurt no more.
Titan listened attentively then watched with murky blue eyes as Simaea moved to place the herbs into their own places along the wall. He didn't see the emotion that had flicked across her amber orange eyes. Glancing towards the entrance of the tunnel, Titan yawned a bit. He was a bit tired from the journey back, but his mind betrayed his body's tiredness. Titan wanted to stay awake. He wanted to learn more.
"You see Titan, there are ailments and pains, that I cannot cure. Sometimes wolves need to rest, it would ease their pain and help them to the inevitable end. So that they wouldn't hurt, as evil as a poisonous plant may seem, it can be used for good"
He shivered once more at the thought of what the small smelly plants could do. They could take down a wolf as giant as his father with an ease that frightened him. However the way she gave the information to him made Titan feel almost awed by the tiny green things that he would step on daily as he lived. Such an insignificant thing could do so much. It kind of gave him hope that even he as a small pup now could grow to become something that could achieve wonderful things.
"That's so awesome..." His eyes drooped but the boy made quite the effort to keep himself awake. The dark Thorben definitely didn't want to fall asleep right in front of a pack mate. Especially since he was finally being taught something that could be useful later. However as he sat there fatigue drove the child to stand up and shake himself.
I should probably get back to mom now... He thought quietly while another yawn escaped the young Thorbens mouth.
"I'm..Probably going to rest now. Thank you Aunt Simi for teaching that stuff to me." Titan gave his farewell dipping his dark crown tiredly and then began to stagger out of the healers den. It was high time he went to sleep after the adventurous day Titan had.
(FADE OUT)