Secret Woodlands all hail the heartbreaker

Birthing thread. Deep within the Thicket of Secrets, the northernmost region of Secret Woodlands. Partly cloudy, 68°F. @Kite @Nina

He was very, very nervous. For days he'd stayed close to home, straying from Kite long enough to hunt and fulfill his duties before slipping back to the den he'd been constructing for her and the children. It was nestled in the thick of the northernmost portion of forest at the base of a wide, old tree whose trunk was speckled with moss, its unearthed roots tangled in creeping, verdant ivy. In the morning, the sunlight danced upon the dirt and grass that led to its east-facing entrance, and in the afternoon it shone for a time just within the shadowed, spacious hollow inside. It was situated so that the winds could not blow within and that the rains would drain away, creating a space that was sheltered and dry. Just to the west and within sight of their home was a quaint clearing that welcomed the bloom of summer flowers when the rains fell just enough and the days were warm and long. A quiet brook, deep enough to submerge only his paws, snaked past both the den and the clearing. Its gentle babbling could be heard from the interior of the home, which he'd fashioned with the dried skin of a fawn ─ soft and inviting. Secluded from the world in a peaceful one of their own, Mirren took pride in his weeks of hard work and knowing that his would enjoy all the luxury he could afford them. His enjoyment of their new homestead did little to quell the anxiety that accompanied the anticipation of the arrival of the children. Inside the den, he could hear Kite's whines and the way her breaths were long and deep. Just outside he stood watch over her, watching the sunlight as it moved across the sky slowly and for hours, casting slanted shadows across the forest floor and illuminating the blades of grass that swayed in the clearing, just off in the distance. The tuft of his plume rose and fell patiently against the dirt beneath him as his mind, at times, took him far away from he and Kite's haven. They would be proud of him, he just knew it. And although his family was not present to share this special moment, they lived on to see it deep within his beating heart. They always would. ------ After a time he'd poked his head inside to lay his eyes on his mate, exhausted as she lay curled with her back against the cool, dirt walls of the den. At her request, Mirren kissed his Kite goodbye and set out to hunt down a suitable meal. He didn't know that it might well have been the last time he'd ever see her again. Hours passed and eventually the Tainn returned, hopeful that his children would be waiting for him, nestled into the warmth of their mother's body. With a plump, feathered meal in his jaws, he crossed the flowered clearing with his eyes set on the darkened den mouth. His heart skipped a beat as the sound of a tiny whimper met his ears from a short distance ─ they had finally arrived!. But...as he approached the den something seemed out of place...It was then that he realized that the single cry sounded strange and...distressed? His brows furrowed together with concern. "Kite?" Dropping the fowl just outside and stepping cautiously inside, what the king did find took his breath away. She was gone. Kite was gone, and ─ alone ─ on the cold, dirty, bloody den floor was a single child. The ringing in his ears was thundering and shrill. The way his heart was pounding and the chill that was icing over every inch of him was frightening. Eyes wide with dismay, his gaze was locked on the tiny cub. How long had she been alive? How long had she been alone? Had she even been fed? Every instinct he had warned him just how close to death the child was, with no mother to keep her safe and no love to welcome her into the world. Furious did not come close to describing the way he felt at that moment as he stood breathless in the face of such an unforgivable betrayal. This couldn't be happening to him, but it already had. After taking a moment to grieve, love, hate, implode, die, and come back to life, and as an ocean of tears swelled in his eyes and rolled down his cheeks, Mirren took a single step toward his first and only child as he was overcome with sorrow. He laid down before her tiny form, inching closer and closer until the creamy tuft of fur on his chest blanketed her and finally he reached to rove her cold, wet back with his nose as his tears bathed over her. His voice was hoarse and not but a broken whisper. "Shhhh...Come now, quit 'yer whining. It's- Y-You're..." His heart was breaking with every breath. "W-We're gonna be okay, little princess." His golden eyes took in every inch of his daughter and boy was she beautiful. She was perfect in every way and...and now she was all he had. "Daddy's here, and you...You're going to be my...my..." Gods, she looked just like her mother. "...Lyanna." Mirren would never forget this moment, these minutes, for as long as he lived, and as each second passed his love for Lyanna grew deeper. Whatever had become of Kite ─ whatever had taken her away or caused her to abandon their daughter and to abandon him ─ would haunt him, and there would be no undoing of the damage she had wrought. The regal Tainn was dead inside, except for the heart that beat only for the tiny life he clung to now. A low howl echoed eerily throughout the trees as darkness fell upon Secret Woodlands ─ he needed @Nina more than ever.

(This post was last modified: May 31, 2015, 02:24 AM by Mirren.)

She had vowed to stay away from the birthing den, feeling that if she made her presence known, it would only cause tension and it was the last thing that Nina ever wanted to deal with. She trusted Mirren and Kite to do what they needed to do and if they needed her, they would call. None the less, as Kite’s due date grew nearer, the Hervok found herself remaining near the territory, never straying too far just in case her adopted son might actually need her. As time passed, Nina was sure that everything was just fine and she was content to travel a little bit so that she could stretch her legs. However, on her way out, a heartbreaking call from Mirren caused her to freeze in her tracks, her ears flattening on her head as her body turned in the direction of the call. Something had obviously happened and it caused Nina’s heart to pump rapidly in her chest at the thought of what it may be. A number of things could have occurred during the birth and Nina would only be able to tell once she arrived on the scene. So without another thought, the regal Queen started towards where Mirren had called. It did not take her long to arrive at the scene, even though she had been quite a bit away. Her legs had pumped fast in order to get her to where she needed to be and as she arrived, slightly out of breath, she peeked her head in immediately, the healer in her demanding to know what was wrong with whoever her patient was. The first thing she noticed was the smell of blood that accompanied a birthing. It was obvious that everything had certainly happened and it seemed that Kite had done what she needed to do to get her children out. However, it was quite obvious that after she had stuck her head in that Kite was nowhere to be seen. Panic entered her heart at the thought that Kite had died but it became quite apparent that there was no scent of death around them. It just seemed that the mother was not where she needed to be. Nina’s single eye then focused on Mirren and the small child he was cradling. From her angle, Nina could not exactly tell what gender the children was, but from scent alone, she was positive it was female. Uncertain is Kite had fed her child or not, Nina spoke in soft tones to Mirren…unsure how he would feel about the suggestion she had, "Mirren…she needs sustenance. I would be willing…if it is alright with you…" Her voice trailed off, not wanting to rip off the fresh bandage he had just needed to put on. All this would do was remind him that Kite was not here to take care of his children, but Nina would be there, every step along the way.

Dawnthieves.de - Table by PuppyThief

It seems when you're around, my life is complete.

A lynx has left behind the remains of a deer. +5 Health

Down, down, down he went, spiraling into the deepest, darkest crypt of despair he would ever know. His body quivered, his heart quivered, and he grew colder and weaker by the second. Alone in the hell that was the den he'd made for his perfect family, the sight of his dying, only child was made blurry through the tears that continued to well and fall from his face. Nothing made sense as his guts churned and he couldn't quite catch his breath. Saliva began to pool in the corners of his dark lips, contorted into a grimace of sadness. Kite's scent was slowly fading as the wind came and went in the space he shared with the tiny cub and the remnants of it burned his nose and stung his heart. Kite's blood was soaking into the creamy fur of his legs and underbelly as he nudged Lyanna's body just as her whimpers began to fade, replaced with a frightening silence he feared was death. Over and over she would quiet, and over and over he would will her to life with what felt like the last traces of his own livelihood. Nina's arrival played out somewhere in his mind, but looking at her form was like looking through a shadowed tunnel. Echoing hollowly in his head, her words were like a foreign language that he couldn't quite make out even if their meaning was understood. A ragged breath filled but part of his lungs as he cried out. Lifting his head, his golden eyes were filled with all the sorrow the boy could behold as he searched for Nina's face. "...Kite...My Kite is gone...I...I..." His voice cracked, hoarse. I don't understand. "Please..." he begged. "...Please." In this moment, he was not the King. He was not a king. He was not a man, but a boy, one who was falling apart at the seams with each second that passed. For the first time in his life, Mirren's heart was breaking apart, and it was a pain he'd never known, and it was a pain he knew he would relive over and over and over again. His legs shook beneath him as he maneuvered away from the child, relinquishing her to @Nina so that, perhaps, she could save all that was left of Kite. Collapsing into the puddled blood, he simply wept.

(This post was last modified: Jun 29, 2015, 07:47 PM by Mirren.)

Nina watched, conflicted as to what she was supposed to do. Her son was crumbling before her eyes and her son’s daughter was in risk of death unless she did something quickly. All of a sudden, as she watched Mirren sink to the ground, it was like the fog that was clouding her vision split and floated away. Kite had done something awful and she would certainly pay for it should she ever return to them. No child ever deserved being deserted, all of her children knew first-paw what it was like to be abandoned, by their fathers. Nina had never heard of a mother leaving their child when it was first born. Fury flowed through her as she looked at the innocent child laying innocuously in front of them.

Clenching her jaw tightly and making the executive decision that this would be the right thing to do, the Hervok moved forward, her back muscles flexing, more in control than she had been in quite some time. Baring her belly to the child, the golden brown woman nudged the small, starving child towards her belly, urging her to take what she needed. Moving her gaze towards the grieving alpha, Nina’s jaws parted, her voice calming and consoling, "Come here, Mirren. Your daughter needs you more than ever." Her affectionate gaze fell onto the child she would take under her wing and help flourish. Even if she did not have her mother, she had her grandmother and Nina held onto the hope that it would be enough.

It seems when you're around, my life is complete.

Panic washed over him and he shuddered despite the way the space suddenly felt tight and hot. His ears were ringing, his vision blurred by tears as Nina moved toward the cub. The leadess nestled his daughter, her voice calm and quiet as she attempted to soothe both he and his daughter. He wanted to abide by Nina's wise request ─ he wanted to inch forward to give the child his love and warmth, and he longed for love and warmth, too. But he couldn't move. He was frozen, as his reanimations of what happened here and why Kite was gone and why their home was cascaded in her blood reeled in his head.

Was she dead? This was supposed to be the best day of their lives. She was just there ─ he'd only left her alone for a little while. What could have possibly caused her to leave? Was she hurt? Did she want to leave? HOW COULD SHE DO THIS TO HIM? For a split second he looked for Lyanna before another wave of anguish rolled through him, stealing his breath and causing his heart to skip a beat and race as he tried to brace himself against the force of it. "I can't," the words that left his lips were but a whisper. His eyes wide, he looked to Nina, then to his daughter, and to his paws, drenched in blood, and finally to the den mouth, where moonlight illuminated the world outside. She was out there somewhere. "I can't do this without her."

While Nina had made an attempt to summon Mirren closer, it seemed like the young man was frozen in his place. The mother looked away from him and down at the starving child as she took what she could. Closing her single eye, she could remember a time when she had been in that very same place. During Koda’s injury and disappearance, Nina had been crippled. No one had been able to help her and she had simply fallen. Tempest had been there but Nina remembered not being able to even process what was going on. All the woman had wanted was Koda and she was reminded of how miserable it had been, just waiting to see what was going on with her mate. But he was gone now and while Nina still loved him, just as she always would, she had moved on and been able to make a life for herself. It had taken time, almost two years but she had done it and survived. Mirren’s words stirred something within her. It was probably the motherly duty to protect him, to protect his heart from what he was feeling. Unfortunately, Nina knew it was impossible to do that. Losing one’s love was the hardest thing to conquer and whether Kite be dead or alive, she was not there with them. It was highly implausible to think that the young woman would have died, she could have called Nina and she would have taken care of it. At least they would have known where she was. The child would never know.

Knowing that Mirren had always taken her words in heart, she looked towards him again, her voice soothing and supportive, "I know you may think that right now but you can. It will take time and you will need strength. Luckily, you have both of those and you have others around you that will love and support you through this time…Kite will always be in your heart, my dear, it's just a matter of whether you will let that knowledge destroy you or help you remember why you are who you are," her voice grew softer, not wanting to rouse the child again. Mirren would be fine, Nina would help him and so would his precious daughter. "And you have a precious daughter that you can dote on and care for so that she can become a beautiful, blossomed flower," Nina added this onto the end, trying to put more logic into her son’s head. Like it or not, he had someone to live for. Someone who would need him and need to count on him for care. The golden brown woman could only do so much to help Lyanna, the rest was up to the child’s father.

It seems when you're around, my life is complete.

He wanted to give up, then. He wanted to collapse onto the floor and breathe his last breath ─ which is what each one that he took felt like ─ and drift off and away and never wake again. It hurt so bad and he wanted it to be over. But then, there was Nina's voice again...

It was telling him that he wasn't alone, that he was loved, and that his daughter needed to be loved, too. Lyanna...needed him, not only to survive but also to flourish and grow...A time of silence followed Nina's kind murmurs of encouragement, as he had no words to offer in return. Instead, he began to focus on the quiet, on the sound of his racing heart and on the sound of his cub suckling. Mirren breathed, in and out, in and out, and when his eyes had dried and there were no more tears that he was willing to shed, a calm came over him.

This was the greatest tragedy, but he would not let it define him. He was incredibly saddened, hurt, abandoned, and betrayed, but he would not give up, allowing his child to feel what he was feeling now. Kite was gone...but he was and had always been strong. This was, perhaps, the end of a beautiful chapter in his life ─ one that he would never stop missing ─ but as his gaze searched for the form of his daughter, he knew that the next chapter had already begun. He resolved to write the story for himself, to make his life better than this, with or without his mate. In the bottom of his heart, he sincerely hoped that this was a temporary situation and that Kite would return. Who knew, maybe she would return by daybreak. One way or another, Mirren would not be defeated ─ not by this. Not by anything. Not by anyone.

The expression on his face as he resolutely sniffed his last pitiful sniffle was perhaps a mirror image of the one his father had so often worn. Stoical. Hardened. Determined. When his tears had dried and his heart was steady, he cleared his throat. "Thank you," he offered Nina. "For everything."

With that, the Leader rose to his feet and, taking in the deepest breath, reveled in his moment of pristine clarity. Moving solemnly to Nina's side, he dipped his masked face down to nudge her cheek as if to assure her that things were going to be okay. Seeing the world through brand new eyes, he looked upon his daughter. "Is she going to make it?"

There was a shift of something. Nina could see it as much as she felt it. As she watched Mirren, with his internal struggle, the alpha felt like she was watching a flashback from a long time ago. A time where she had lived under the protective gaze of Ruiko. She felt pride swell in her chest as she watched the Tainn regain himself, seeming to remember what he had instead of what he had lost. It was important for him to keep this in mind in the future, for if he did not, it was easy to fall back into that darkness, that depression that would be waiting to consume him. As he made his way over to her Nina watched him, pride radiating in her eyes. There was no need for her to tell him how proud she was of him, she was almost certain that he could see it. As he nudged her cheek, the Hervok gave him a gentle kiss on his, reminding him that he had others who loved him deeply. He thanked her, much the gentleman that he was, and Nina replied with a soft smile of her own, knowing it was all that he needed.

Being the ever caring soul that he was, the Tainn immediately turned his attention onto his daughter. Nina had inspected the child long since and had made sure that everything was as stable as it could be. She would be alright. "Yes, she is perfect. And like her father, very much a fighter." As she lay on her side, watching the child suckle, she could not help but feel a dull source of sadness, due to the fact that she had not had children this year. The golden dam had no problem taking Lyanna under her wing and would do everything in her power to ensure that she transformed into a wonderful woman with the morals that Mirren wished to teach her. Even without a mother, her life would still be a good one.

It seems when you're around, my life is complete.

One more after this one and we can wrap this up <3

"Yes, she is perfect. And like her father, very much a fighter."

Of course she was. The blood that coursed through his own veins coursed through his tiny daughter's ─ Tainn blood, Onida blood, L'Crowe blood. It was as if he could feel the very force that fed his life pulsing from her shivering body, and with Nina's love and care and the nourishment she was willing to provide, somehow Mirren was certain that Lyanna would live to fight on. To Nina's words, he offered only a fleeting smile and a small nod, his eyes glancing from his daughter to Nina's emerald gaze and back. For a moment he lingered there in the den, watching and listening to Lyanna's whimsical whimpering, which was so much more than just music to his ears. It was the song in his heart now..

"I'll be right outside."

Mirren slipped from the confines of the den out into the starlit world of the thicket, where the air was cool and fresh and the sound of the leaves rustling in the trees accented the stirring in his soul. It was like seeing these particular surroundings for the first time, as if he'd never laid his eyes upon the rolling hills or the gently babbling waters of the creek before. Indeed, the world without Kite in it was absolutely foreign, and as his amber eyes ─ paled by the light of the moon ─ roved over the shadowed terrain, he knew this was going to be the hardest thing. Existing without her. As resolute as he was about going on for Lyanna, Mirren knew that when the sun rose a part of him would remain in the darkness of this night, forever.

{fade}

(This post was last modified: Aug 26, 2015, 06:34 AM by Mirren.)