Hearthwood River breaking down the walls in my own mind

Open to any of Lilya's new packmates ^^

The entire experience was exhilarating, familiarizing herself with one specific territory, knowing that she could finally have a place to ground her, a place to keep her steady and her head clear when she had nowhere else go… a place to call home. A long time ago, back when she’d left or while she’d just been a pup, she would have laughed at the situation, called it evil and said that it was holding her back… but after a year as a loner, and everything she’d seen? Lilya was happy that she had a home to return to, a home to serve.

She’d stuck to the territory the past couple days, learning the ins and outs, though she kept to herself, learning the best hunting areas around the surrounding scenery, daring to press off of pack territory though she was careful to not go too far, while also associating herself with the borders to these strange new lands. She had to say she was settling in quite nicely… nicely to the aspects of the pack… except the social ones. She knew Kisla and Lachesis, she’d met them prior to the alabaster man taking her in the way he had.

They’d both been incredibly friendly, and she could only hope that the rest of the pack shared those traits… she knew one thing, something that Kisla had said that had sort of stuck with her… Hearthwood River was for those who were loyal, loyal wolves to stick around and not run when things got tough. She remembered that from their meeting, and she intended to hold true to those ideals.

The tawny woman ran forward, letting the wind pull through her fur, a grin on her face as she sniffed around for one of her favorite spots, right by the southern border, not on the territory but near it, where she could see hints of the lake peeking between the trees if she looked hard enough… it was hard to see at times, but it was there. There was a lot to do, a lot of wolves to meet, things to learn. She’d heard there were pups, avoiding them actively because it wasn’t her place.

She was the very definition of the “new girl” and as a rule of thumb, the new girl did not get to see the pups let alone stop by to see them. Maybe at a pack meeting, or at some kind of event, but not actively seeking them out… that just seemed… creepy? Was that the right word for it? Lilya wasn’t too sure, but she definitely felt like something different. She’d grieved, knowing that confirmation that her family was dead… but at the same time? She had really known all along, that they’d been so terribly outnumbered and the odds of survival had been slim. Her family had been fighters to the end, loyal to the cause she was forced into.

What was different about this cause? Lilya committed to it, she wasn’t born into it. She’d sworn to Lachesis that she’d fight, hunt, scout, and work for the pack, and that wasn’t an oath she found herself breaking anytime soon. Not something of that magnitude. The blue-eyed girl kept her eyes on the prize as she continued to barrel through the trees towards her destination.

Even after just three days, Karina could tell that her den is Zephyr Rill was not going to work for her new situation. It would have been the perfect sanctuary for her and Kjors and baby Bennet, beautiful, serene, and secluded from the rest of Hearthwood River.  However, the addition of Lachesis’s new children had turned her formally quiet refuge into grand central station, with Lachesis and other well-wishers constantly dropping in. Kjors was a good sport about it all, but Karina knew he would appreciate having his home to himself once more.

She shuffled through the heart of Hearthwood River, heavy teats swaying with every step. Before Bennet was born Karina had been holed up in Zephyr Rill for weeks, refusing to come out or speak to anyone in her grief for her father. She was so delirious from despair and hunger that she hadn’t even realized who Naia’s pups were, or thought to question why they were there. Karina’s senses had returned to her after Bennet’s birth, her motherly hormones kicking in and demanding that she must get up, she must get over herself, she must start acting like a mother and an adult, someone worthy and capable of caring for the new children.

Her hormones had also left her feeling somewhat.. happy. Blissful, even. The loss of her father still weighed upon her, but she found herself able to reminisce more easily about good times with Maksim, and she no longer felt such intense guilt for her own past actions. Though she and Naia had never been close or really seen eye to eye, Karina also mourned Naia’s death, chiefly for Lachesis and her sweet pups’ sake. It was also for Lachesis’s sake that she wished to relocate further into Hearthwood, so that he wouldn’t feel like an intruder every time he wished to visit his children.

Karina was sniffing beneath a large bush—one that had significant potential—when she became aware of a packmate upwind, traveling quickly. She gave a loud bark to hail the speeding girl, someone she didn’t recognize, who had likely joined the pack when Karina was at the peak of her reclusive depression. Karina was still weak from the fast and Bennet’s birth, and she knew she had no hope of catching up with the stranger herself. She lifted her cloudy gaze to sweep across the Redwoods, wondering if the girl decided to come meet her or if she had even heard the bark in her haste to get herself southward.

   

    
 

Lilya had almost lost herself in thought and the wind when she heard the loud bark, eyes widening a little as she started to skid to a halt rather quickly, almost hitting a tree in the process as she let a soft smile fall onto her features, managing to come to a complete stop rather quickly, turning herself around to look at the woman who’d called out to her with the noise, a wagging tail and a tilted head… instantly she started to analyze, padding back up with a relaxed expression though her tail was lowered to show slight submission and respect… it was evident from her appearance than this woman had been caring for pups, but she was not Kisla, which Lilya found curious.

She knew that Kisla was the leader, the alphaess, but at the same time if she’d had pups, Lilya would have known when she’d first met her, and she would have already been pregnant. It was not something she would dwell on for too long, finally opening up the conversation with her own words in a soft and friendly tone. “’ello there! M’names Lilya!” She could be and was quite the bubbly personality when it came down to it, even with everything she’d experienced in her relatively short life.

She suddenly found that she had many questions, ones that she bit her tongue for asking – she was new, and they were answers she could get with time, or at least after she had gotten through a proper introduction with the other wolf.

After Karina barked, she could hear a small disturbance in the undergrowth as the speeding lady made an effort to halt. Quicker than Karina had thought possible the stranger appeared before her, smiling and introducing herself. She smiled back; the action was becoming increasingly easier for her as she watched her child grow.  The Baranski princess had been a solemn, anxious child, but she was growing into a much more cheerful woman. She knew she had Bennet and Kjors and the Mother above to thank for that.

“Lilya,” Karina echoed, voice warm and friendly. She couldn’t quite put her paw on it, but something about the girl reminded her of Naia. Perhaps it was her free and easy smile, or the way she had been dashing across Hearthwood moments ago. The priestess could plainly see the similarities in their auras—both women had auras that ebbed and flowed extensively, reaching out in all directions with exploratory tendrils. Lilya would be a curious wolf, and she no doubt had endless questions about the pack situation into which she had stumbled.

“I’m Karina. I’m sure you’ve met my mother, Kisla.” Yep, that would clear everything up for the new girl. Clear as mud. The young mother opened her mouth to try to explain more, but no words came out.  She didn’t even know where to begin. “Think this will be a good den site? To raise children?” she asked instead, sweeping her crystalline gaze over the swatch of territory. Her cloudy eyes revealed little to her, but she could survey the area with her other senses. She could hear a small brook trickling nearby, a tributary stream flowing into the mighty Hearthwood River. She could scent the burrows of small woodland creatures nearby, good for hunting practice but nothing big enough to threaten a curious pup. The large bush before her would swallow the entrance of the den, concealing her little haven and protecting it from foul weather. She knew little of these things, but it seemed perfect to the new mother. 

   

    
 

The woman appeared to greet her warmly back in return, causing that soft smile to grow a bit more, not even an ounce of hesitation in her eyes as her tail carried a light wag. She seemed nice enough, and evidently she was a part of the pack, an integral part given the fact that she carried the scent of pups… it was nice to meet new faces, faces she was to consider family, especially important faces like hers. She explained that she was Karina, and that Kisla was her mother and it did clear some things off. She’d never actively met a pack that passed breeding rights down, parent to child, but she’d heard whispers of them over her months of travel… curious, but none of her business.

“Yes’m. Lady Kisla was very kind ta me. Told me about the lands while I was jus’ a loner and helped me stay outta trouble because of it.” She explained with a grin, and a nod. Yes, she knew Kisla, who’d offered her a home that Lilya had politely declined… and then Lachesis had done the same, told her it’d be good for her despite her demons and that fear she had that they’d followed her… really it had been the two of them that had convinced her to seek out the borders.

She looked around, sniffing around the air, looking for hints of danger, anything to rule it out… it was strange that she was asking her opinion – she was the new kid… well, not a kid but that was beside the point. “Ah think it’ll be great!” She offered after a minute or so of pondering, that soft smile returning to her features. It seemed like a safe location from all angles... and safe was good when you had troublesome pups always sneaking about. “I haven’t had the opportunity ta meet evr’one yet… nobody but Lachesis and your mother and now you!” She explained carefully before posing a question. “What are th’others like?” She was curious about the wolves she was supposed to call family, and some seemed to be more elusive than others... or maybe that was just her.

There is a family of deer nearby. Hunt Opportunity

Karina raised an eyebrow as the “new girl” praised her mother as kind and welcoming.  Kisla was many things—strong, composed, practical, thoughtful, trustworthy, dependable, and forgiving (thank the Mother)—but the warm and generous queen that Lilya described was somewhat new to Karina. Perhaps Kisla had changed too in the months that her daughter had been absent from the packlands.

All thoughts of her mother vanished when the girl delivered her opinion of the densite. ”Me too!” Karina offered with a grin, ears and tail perking up to mirror her companion’s energy. The girl was a bit of a mesmerism and had an easy, spunky way about her that was infectious.

“The others.. they’re..” Karina almost launched into an explanation of the ranks and hierarchy, but she realized she didn’t know what to say about anyone anymore. She had been gone for months, and Hearthwood was much changed in the wake of their tragedy. “Well, they’re sad. Everyone is.”

”My dad, Maksim.. he was our King, even back when we were Cut Rock River and not Hearthwood. He had been.. sick for a long time, and he passed away last moon." Her explanation was going to be a mood killer for sure, but the girl needed to know what was going on and Karina wasn’t positive how much she had been told.

“Dad was sick, so Lachesis got the breeding right this year, and so he and my mom’s Second had Kyrios and Atropos. But she—Naia.. the mom.. she passed away too, giving birth." Karina had left out the part about how she had her own daughter,without the breeding right.. but Lilya seemed sharp and would probably put it together.

”So my brothers and sisters—Orren, and Inna and Lekalta—they’re all.. dealing with things in their own way.” And Aleksei! Karina’s mind screamed at her, but she knew there was little point in adding her wayward brother’s name to the list. Lilya would probably never meet him anyhow. “I’m glad you’re here,” Karina added with a small smile, ”I think you’ll help cheer everyone up.”

“There’s also Kjors,” Karina continued, with a bit more optimism. If Lilya was observant she would see evidence of a different sort of emotion passing over Karina’s face; something lighter and more energetic. ”..My mom’s advisor. He would be great for you to meet. He can help you with all kinds of things, fighting or hunting or whatever you want to learn.” As she was suggesting it, Karina felt a stab of something strange—was it jealously?! Kjors was her mentor, the small voice insisted. Karina tempered the emotion with a smooth inhale. Kjors could love no one, not even this bright eyed young girl, as much as he loved Karina and Bennet.

”And lastly, Bennet. My new daughter. But you can meet her and get to know her for yourself.” If Lilya was as much like Naia as the intuitive woman imagined, then she would jump at the chance to play with a puppy.

   

    
 

Ahhhh, Lilya started to ramble and it got lengthy real fast XD

Lilya had never stopped to consider that she perhaps possessed a more cheerful aura – she would have thought the exact opposite, in fact, because she was always looking over her shoulder for demons that she’d been assured had stopped searching for her… but there was still that lingering doubt. Perhaps it was because she tried her best not to dwell on such matters, and pushed herself to not think about them simply because it wasn’t the healthy thing to do. Either way, the description of the queen had seemed to pull a reaction out of the queen’s daughter, one that Lilya could not tell what it was – confusion, questioning? She could not tell from the raised eyebrow – cues had never been her thing, and expressions sometimes confused her.

But as quickly as the look appeared, it disappeared because the topic had been changed to the densite and she seemed to agree, a smile being brought to the woman’s face just as one held carefully on Lilya’s own. Smiles were much better, and keeping smiles among pack mates was, in her opinion, one of the best ways to keep a pack unified and together, which meant smiles she hoped she saw more often… then again the only pack experience she had was a pack in the midst of a war for their lives. She really couldn’t speak could she?

She remained silent through the explanation, it faltered at first and Lilya’s smile turned more to a comforting one when she explained that everyone was sad, and more importantly, why they were sad. It had been a pack ripped by tragedy, not just once, in losing a King, but twice in losing a loyal second-in-command, and a mother. “Ah’m truly sorry fer your loss, even if ah never knew ‘em.” She dipped her head lightly, the almost melancholy and sincere expression pressing upwards to infect her icy blue eyes as well.

She couldn’t help but think of Maelia.

She explained that everyon was dealing with it in their own ways, and she gave an understanding nod. “Everyone’s gotta grieve in their own way… it ain’t somethan that can be forced… jus remember, not all those who wander, whether it’s mentally or physically, are lost… and in the end, if they’re meant ta be ‘ere, then they’ll find their way back.” That seemed to be a lesson she understood better than most, a lesson she’d learned just from what had happened back home.

What had quickly become a frown was lifting upwards into a light smile to mimic Karina’s expression, a light nod. “Ah hope I can ‘elp pull everyone through tough times… and m’sure the pups will help a lot with that too… watchin’ em grow will no doubt bring some happiness around.” She assured her with a smile before Karina continued, Lilya noting the way she seemed to light up when she talked about the advisor, the soft smile growing more into a grin.

Did someone have a crush?

No, Lilya wouldn’t let herself think like that. She didn’t really know anyone in this pack, even those she’d met, and she wasn’t going to presume just a thing because of the way a woman spoke about a man… she couldn’t.

“Ah think I’m good… I learned a lot o’ skills in ma birth pack… but maybe I’ll seek ‘im out for a quick spar jus’ to make sure ah’ve still got it.” She suggested, not wanting to take such an offer for granted but also not entirely sure she needed assistance to begin with… that was a giant grey area she’d have to address at some point, figure it out through experience.

And then there was the mention of a puppy, but not just any puppy, Karina’s daughter, one of three pups if she’d pulled the right details out of the information she’d just been given. “Ah’d love ta meet her!” She’d never really been around pups since she’d been one herself, but they were the blood of heart of the pack in the spring, she’d learned that as her time as a loner, watching everyone react to an outsider who got close to borders while pups were wandering free in the territory. She knew that all too well.

“Ah take it you care fer Lachesis’ children too..?” She asked softly with a smile… if their mother had died, they would have needed someone to care for them, provide milk… and Karina had a pup of her own, so that was where she’d been led logically. “If you ever need a break from the munchkins, then ah’d be more than willing to watch them… if yer comfortable with that, that is.” She'd never ask something that made another one of her packmates uncomfortable, but it really would be the least she could do after they took her in.

Happens to me all the time!

Karina felt a tug on her emotions as @Lilya acknowledged her loss. Grief was like that; it ebbed and swelled at odd little moments, and Karina could feel its familiar rawness creeping steadily up the back of her throat. Unsure if she would be able to make words, she nodded in acceptance of the other wolf’s condolences. After a moment she swallowed her emotion down and continued, allowing her mind to immerse itself in the telling of the story, and her grief ebbed away once more.

 Lilya seemed to have her own conjectures about grief, explaining that it could lead a wolf to wander. The intuitive girl tilted her head in curiosity. Her companion seemed knowledgeable and convicted enough to be speaking from experience.. had it been some kind of heartbreak that led Lilya to Hearthwood?

 ”If they’re meant to be here, then they’ll find their way back.” Karina had found her way back after all,  so @Orren definitely would. He was Hearthwood through and through, and belonged here much more so than Karina and her unconventional family. Orren should be leading us.  The errant thought popped up suddenly in Karina’s mind, surprising even her. Was that really how she felt?  If it can’t be Dad, it should be Orren, the voice argued obstinately. So what did that mean for Lachesis? He had been as commendable a leader anyone could have imagined. What did it mean for the father of her child, who continued to vie for the throne himself?

 Dragonveil. The answer dawned on Karina with the force of a brick dropping into her stomach, but once it was out in the open she realized the thought had been tugging at her for a while. @Kjors was not happy as second in command, and Lachesis wasn’t backing down either. The Mother had sent her visions of her family thriving in Dragonveil, and perhaps Karina had ignored them for too long.

 Where was she in the story? Oh right. Kjors. The girl continued speaking with a cheerier note in her voice as she thought about Dragonveil, Kjors, and thriving children. “Yes, I do for now,” Karina answered Lilya’s question. As long as the alabaster twins needed milk Karina was the one for the job, but once the foster pups were weaned she knew their care would fall more evenly upon the other wolves of the pack. It was how things usually worked.

  “That would be fantastic,” Karina agreed gratefully to Lilya’s offer to babysit the twins. She hardly spent any time one-on-one with her daughter, and it was important for Karina to have the opportunity to impart on her just how special she was. Perhaps in Hearthwood she was the misfit, but in Dragonveil.. @Bennet was a princess.  

  “I’m sorry I interrupted you,” Karina said, referring to the run that Lilya had previously been on, “..but I’m glad I got to meet you. And thank you for sharing your wisdom.” The Baranski girl worried that she had held her new friend captive here too long already, when she so clearly had been on her way someplace else very quickly. 

(This post was last modified: Aug 27, 2016, 03:13 PM by Karina. Edit Reason: tags )

   

    
 

Lilya had remembered the grief that had come with Maelia’s death… no one else had grieved her passing because no one else had known about their midnight runs and Lil had bit her tongue, had kept her mouth shut while everyone slandered her sister for running away from them… everyone except Lilya who’d quickly learned how to mourn in silence, bury herself in her work and her training and let some of the fire in her heart die. She knew from experience what grieving was like, even if it was something she didn’t talk about… she didn’t think she’d ever be able to talk about what happened that night.

At least they had each other to turn to, and they could seek each other for console if they wished it… that was more than she’d had, and eventually, that grief along with the constant violence had caused her to flee, paranoia had kept her running… and a sense of peace and acceptance had led her to her new home. Everything happened for a reason, she didn’t call it a god or a deity, she simply called it destiny, and everyone had one that kept their paws moving to where they were meant to be. She couldn’t be sure Hearthwood River was the place she was meant to be, but the more time she spent there, the more right it felt.

She answered her question without question, and quickly she agreed to her offer, a smile on her features. She saw light and hope in the next generation, something that needed to be nurtured more than she had her siblings had been, because she saw where it would lead if they were not, pain and violence and remorse… that was another thing she refused to allow present… something she hoped to avoid like war and pain and death.

“Oh, m’not too worried ‘bout it.” She quickly shrugged off the apology. “Ah was just aquaintin’ m’self more with the territory… but th’wolves inside are always more important.” She assured her, because it was true… you defended your territory with your teeth and claws and marks along the border, but you defended your packmates with your life.