Velo en Cascada Don't stop us now

Assuming the Edgy crew is nearby, doing whatever.
For my darling, beloved, beef-cake borka @Reyes

At first Askan had felt strange being a loner, a vagabond, with no place to call home. And yet, as their-not so motley- crew grew in numbers he couldn't help but wonder what they were supposed to do next. Should they continue wandering the land with nothing but each other's company? Or was it time to find someplace to call their own? The Selwyn spent a great deal of time weighing up the pros and cons, for it was not a decision to be made lightly. Only when he knew in his heart of hearts, when he couldn't be anymore sure did he seek out his mate with the intention of sharing his thoughts.

Reyes seemed to know the area better than he did, for his trail was unwavering and decisive, a straight line through the autumn forest. A few hours prior he had mentioned that he was heading out to hunt but Askan suspected that he wanted some time alone, and more importantly some peace and quiet. Askan adored his little gang but even he had to admit that they did grate on his nerves sometimes. Like a bird who just wouldn't stop singing.

They'd be fine on their own for a little while and he'd be back soon enough, hopefully with Reyes in tow.

Askan heard the rush of water long before he saw it. At first he thought nothing of it, after all he'd seen the great falls and watched the water plummet, hitting dozens of rocks on its way down. And yet as he drew near he realised that the beat was different, it wasn't a massive and loud gush, nor was he familiar with these parts of woods. It seemed as though Reyes had found a little hiding spot for himself, if not right now then before, when he'd last roamed these parts.

Stepping out into the open, Askan marvelled at the sheet of falling water and the dark cave that was beyond it. He let out a soft 'booof' in greeting, letting his mate know he was there. He couldn't see Reyes but he could smell him, which led him to believe he was hiding, behind the water probably.

"Gabe." He said, as a smile tugged at his lips."Can I join you, or do you want to lurk in peace?"

“Since when did you start asking?” the brute huffed, by way of inviting his mate to join him. And that’s as simple as it was, at least to him – they were partners, lov-- Mates, whatever else that entailed. They embarked on this journey together, for better or for worse. Fuck all knew that leaving a pack right before wintertime was dumb as hell, but it was better that way. Once they knew they didn’t intend to stay, at least they had the integrity to tell Drestig and Jessie and just be done with it – none of that leeching behavior Icicle and Castle had taken part of. Weren’t staying, weren’t draining the resources.

The older wolf stretched out, grimacing as his spine popped before he shuffled to the side, making it quite evident there was room for Askan at his side. “You know,” he mused, giving his mate a sideways look, “this was the first place I found in this damn forest. Was still thinking ‘bout turning round and heading south again ‘cos the winter was gonna freeze my damn nose off.”

It went without saying that he was glad he’d stuck it out. He’d have never met Askan if he’d returned to the forests south.

Reyes had a point. Usually the Selwyn would just flop down beside him, as he knew that his mate would-almost always-appreciate his company. Sometimes he grumbled and groaned, or might have even given him the stink eye but Askan knew how he really felt. He knew that Reyes wasn't the sort to take things lying down, that if he didn't like Askan or want him nearby then he'd damn well let him know. But he did nothing of that sort. Instead he shifted his position and pushed out his legs so there was ample room for Askan to get comfortable.

Indulging in his silent offer, Askan stepped around the wall of water and settled down, pressing himself into his mate's side. They had only been apart for a little while, but their reunion was just as sweet as ever. Wholesome and good, there was nowhere Askan would rather be than here, nuzzling into the thick fur of Reyes' throat. He let out a pleased rumble as his eyes closed and his tail thumped against the mossy rocks. He was happy, happier than he had been in a long time.

"I won't ask next time then, I'll swoop down on you just like party owl."Askan told him, once he'd had his sappy fill.

Huh, so that's how he knew about this place. It was funny really, how he'd managed to find this place once again. So much had changed in the past year but Askan imagined that this place was still the same, that the machinations of wolves had very little effect on the water flowing through these parts.

"I've been thinking a lot recently."Askan began, his gaze set on the falling water."And...I think it's time we settle down. Properly. Not like we are now, just hanging about like ghosts."

This wasn't something he'd ever thought he'd want, not after that whole mess with his Father. But he wasn't the same man he'd been back then, he'd changed-for the better, he hoped- and he was ready. Or at least he thought he was.

"I want us to be equals...I want you to lead with me Gabe. And I know that's not how it's done...it's not proper but since when do those rules apply to us? We could do it, I think."

He wasn't very good at this was he? It must have seemed so random, so left field. Askan sighed and for what felt like the millionth time cursed his social ineptitude.

"The thing is...I don't think I can be a follower anymore, you know? Can't stand the thought of putting my future in someones paws like that, not again. I want my efforts to amount to something, I want to work towards things that count, that make me happy, not just to please someone more important than me. I wanna...build something with you."

“Party owl was a heathen.”

Still liked owls. Maybe not that particular owl, but he liked the birds far better than those that sang or fluttered. He reached up a paw to swat at his mate for the comment, but it was half-hearted at best. Perhaps it was even a little playful. The corner of his mouth suggested as much. “What does that mean? Settling.”

Gabriel had been a drifter for most of his life – maybe a ghost wasn’t such a bad description. He didn’t mind terribly. Rather liked it. Suffered from itchy paws while they stated in Wild Rye Fields. That was likely the reason he’d gotten in as much trouble as he did, and he wasn’t certain if that would ever change, but at least being a loner offered him the chance to do as he saw fit. Ears pricked as Askan spoke, years of practice doing well to keep him from displaying the range of emotions that flittered across his mind as the ideas came and went, more than one wolf had expected in a casual brooding session.

“Askan – if you don’t wanna be led – what are you saying? You want your own?”

A young deer has been separated from the rest of its herd. Hunt Opportunity

Askan sighed and shook his head a little at his mate's question. That seemed about right, what had he been thinking? He shouldn't have just expected his mate to understand, to see where he was coming from. After all, their backgrounds were completely different. Polar opposites, like night and day. From what Reyes had said it sounded as though he'd been raised by his Mother, that-at least until his sisters came along- it had just been the two of them against the world.

To Askan, it sounded like such a lonely upbringing , as his had been anything but. From the very start and until the end when he'd left in the dead of night there had always been someone looking out for him. Be it a cousin, an aunt or even just a family friend. Before the massacre there had been no shortage of Selwyns...It was heartbreaking to know the same couldn't be said for now, or so Askan thought (as little did he know that there was an abundance of Selwyn youngsters roaming the land).

But he was getting sidetracked, again.

These thoughts that were still new and confusing to him must have been all the more difficult for Reyes to comprehend. Askan had to explain, make him see and understand where he was coming from. Even if it was difficult.

"It means...not just making do with second best, or even third. I grew to love the field, yeah, but it's not what I would have chosen. I want to be able to choose, with you, somewhere that ours. That will always be ours, no matter what."

As lovely as the field was in the summer, all golden and grassy, the location had caused a fair amount of tension between them and their northern neighbours. Askan knew for a fact that if he and Reyes had been at the helm such an issue wouldn't have even surfaced in the first place. They were too careful for that.

"I want my own, yeah. But I want it to be yours too. Ours. You and me as equals, cause that's how it is."He paused for a moment, then leaned forward to give his mate's snout a quick kiss."If it was just you and me I don't think I'd mind going it alone as much. But it's not, you know? We've got others to look out for."

If they were at the helm, tensions wouldn’t have risen between packs because Reyes and Askan wouldn’t have tolerated the various levels of bullshit the Avalons seemed content to stomach.

But that was neither here nor there, especially since Reyes couldn’t read minds.

So instead he listened, carefully – the words his mate was saying, and the words he wasn’t. Because this wasn’t his thing. Because he’d tried this before, and it didn’t really work out, and-- Well. Maybe that wasn’t a secret he could take to the grave, after all. Just never imagined it would come up like this; never imagined Askan would break away like this. He couldn’t compare it to anything.

“Yeah…yeah. Ain’t just us anymore.” They had their weird little ragtag band of wolves – Cotton, maybe his friend. Hawethorn, Phoenix, Remington too. Just a strange collection, but he liked them all, a little bit. “So, uh, since we aren’t going at it alone, I guess it’s time for me to come clean ‘bout some stuff, too. I haven’t, uh, always been a loner, like I’ve said. There was a short stint with a pack, for a few seasons. It didn’t work out well. Obviously.”

Askan had always known that his mate was full of secrets, but he-perhaps foolishly-liked to think he knew him well. That their bond was strong and resolute, so much so that-almost- nothing could come between them. But it appeared as though he was wrong, that Gabriel had been withholding things from him. He'd be a liar if he claimed that it didn't hurt, he didn't expect him to monologue about his life but this seemed like the sort of thing he should have mentioned a while ago. So why hadn't he?

Pursing his lips, Askan regarded Reyes with with a squint. He could see why he'd brought it up now, the timing seemed about right and yet the bitterness remained , like stormy clouds that refused to move on. He leaned away, supporting himself for damn once, and pulled his legs closer to his chest, his tail covering them once he'd settled.

"You don't think we can do it? Is that it?"

Perhaps he was overthinking this, kicking up a fuss when there was no need, but he needed to know. Even more so than what had happened to his pack before. Whether it had actually been his pack in the first place or not, if it had gone south under his rule then...Maybe it was cause for concern. He'd never doubted his mate before, nor did he have any intentions to do so now. He simply needed clarity now more than ever.

"What happened? Wish you'd told me before but..."His shrug was telling, he wasn't happy about this in the least.

“Blackwatch Canyon. It was mine.”

And only his. No co-leader. No beta wolf. Agents of chaos. Scouts. Bruisers. It was hard to explain, because he had never encountered another pack like it. They were nomadic. They did work, because Gabriel Reyes was a restless soul – often in exchange for food, or perhaps something else. He didn’t like thinking about it much. He was different then. Younger. More foolish.

And clearly, too trusting.

His ears rolled back, but he never looked away from Askan. He did not like talking about it, but he’d opened the door. There was no going back now. “Nomadic pack. No bigger than six at a given time, I think. One wolf though, Finch – didn’t like it. Decided he could do it better. Got a few others, a few outsiders, and ambushed me. These scars? Him. And his. Fought them off, but why the fuck would I want to stay with disloyal wolves? So I moved on. Thought I was done with packs.”

But then he met Askan Selwyn, and everything changed.

Gabriel didn't respond to his first set of questions. That left a foul taste on Askan's tongue, like he'd just swallowed a mouthful of shit. He wasn't sure whether it was telling, that Gabe didn't think they could do it...Or if he'd just gotten distracted by the past. God, he hoped it was the latter, but either way this wasn't the sort of conversation he'd hoped to have. Reyes was supposed to solidify his resolve, not weaken it!

Then he went onto explain what had happened, Blackwatch Canyon and the mess it had quickly degenerated into. The prospect of a nomadic pack wasn't a strange one to Askan, the Selwyns had dealt with a handful of them before. Some of them were friendly enough, just passing through, whilst others had encroached on their land and in turn had earned the fury of the wolves of the mountain. Needless to say, they were never seen again in those parts.

Still, it was all a lot to take in. Askan had always assumed his mate had been a loner, that before they'd met there had been nothing more to him. Stupid really, for him to assume that he alone had brought along the end of his loner lifestyle, that going it alone was all the Southerner knew.

Instinctively, Askan wanted to get mad, pissy. How could he have not told him? Did he not trust him, was that it? Clearly that wasn't the case, otherwise he wouldn't even be here, let alone talking to him at all. So why?

"Well...That sucks.Was all Askan managed to say. Everything else was too bitter, even for Askan's tastes."But...do you think this time will be different? With you and me?"He asked, leaning into his touch, hoping that Reyes would believe him in, in his idea, his vision.