Underground Sea there is a city this darkness can't hide

Elias shifted, a little sheepish under her cold gaze. He wasn't here to patronise her, nor did he want to turn her into something she was.The way he saw it she was fine as she was, well perhaps not fine but he had no intentions nor desire to change her foundations. She reminded him of Askan sort of, so aloof and determined to maintain the distance between them. Little did they know it only made him want to get past that wall all the more.

And then she asked him a question and it was like a hoof to the gut.

Elias wasn't really...he wasn't good at sharing. Little things, unimportant things he could blurt them out no problem. But things close to his chest, things that mattered? He kept them locked up tight, sealed away so they never saw the light of day. Bringing them out, examining them wasn't something he'd ever even thought about. He didn't have time, there was so much to do, so many wolves who depended on him and yet...The pain, the hurt never went away, it was as much as a part of him as his missing toes.  He just pushed on through it, smiled and pretended everything was fine when he knew it wasn't.

Shuffling down onto the floor, Elias rested his chin on his front legs as a sigh passed from his lips. She had asked so he would answer but he needed a moment all the same.

"Mm, I have. I was taken away from my Mother when I was little so I... grieved for her, what we could have had. What could have been. And then..."He swallowed thickly and looked away, his gaze settling on the underground pool."And then more recently some bad people came and did bad things...a lot of people died got hurt or run away. They did this to me and-"He shook his head as a shaky breath passed from his lips. The panic was rising, if he continued he wouldn't be able to stop. It would just build and build, till it replaced what little stability he had left.

"I understand where you're coming from. I've lost so much too."

(This post was last modified: Jan 10, 2018, 01:36 AM by Elias.)

It wasn't the answer she was expecting, not by a long shot. Finally the man was subdued, getting off his odd paws to settle down on the cavern floor and consider her question. It even took him some time, and when he finally began to speak, each word drew her gaze a bit more and more to him. He spoke of abandonment and violence, and when her gaze was directed to his missing digits, she felt a spark of that old fire. The one that had come to life when Duckweed had been attacked, when Zerxes had found herself and @Pip alone in the forest. The anger directed at the evil in the world fanned by not just the desire but the belief that something could be done about it. That she could do something about it. Anxiety seeped into his voice, and then he was done, and as she looked away again, the spark died without any fuel to keep it alive.

Nineva moved. She stood and closed the distance between them without a word, to flop down beside him. The action was unintentionally graceful, as all her movements were despite her large size, but there was still nothing amiable about her demeanor. Her presence remained cold and distant, even as she leaned her spine against his flank to share her warmth with him through the plush of her thick coat. Occasionally, her tail would tap the stone and her ears would flick this way or that, but the rest of her was still except her breathing.

She had been wrong. He certainly did understand. Just, somehow, he had managed to come out of such wreckage in a state completely opposite of hers. Maybe one day she'd figure out how.

Regret plagued Elias day in day out. Sometimes the past was all he could think about, dark and foreboding like a storm on the horizon. He put on a good show of being fine, Elias was well aware of that, but everyone once and a while a chink in his armour would appear and it would all rush out in a sudden torrent of despair and self loathing. He was a mistake, the fact that he had managed to survive at all was just happenstance, there were so many Selwyns more deserving than he but here he was...alive and wishing that wasn't the case.

Elias wasn't looking for a pity party. He didn't want her to apologise and go back on her words, he just... he gained no sense of relief from being honest and open. Some folks believed talking about it helped but he couldn't agree with that notion. The past was supposed to remain just that, dragging it out into the light did nothing but make him feel awful. But then...his ears tipped at the sound of movement and a warmth pressed against his side. This wasn't....her nature remained the same as before, she certainly wasn't hugging him or anything equally as sappy but it felt good at the same. He didn't feel so alone. Funny how the roles had reversed, he'd wanted to help her and here she was doing the same, even if she was as frosty as ever.

Not wanting to push his luck or get snapped at Elias, wriggled just a little closer. Grey met blonde and in the dimness of the the cavern the world didn't quite so bleak as it had before. Even if only for a little while.

Fade

(This post was last modified: Jan 10, 2018, 04:50 PM by Elias.)