Driftwood Surge On My Own

Subtle mhm's fluttered from her mouth as Sana explained some more details that were known and not known. Whether the pale woman knew them already or not, it was good to hear them also come from her. To hear someone else's worries was important and she hoped to show Sana that her opinion would always be important. Deep down Anastasia knew that she wanted to greet this with a gentle paw rather than express that she shouldn't bend backwards to be someone she wasn't or to act a certain way to appease others. It was an itchy thing to want to express to the dark youth but at this point Anastasia just wanted to find all the sides to this story.

So she listened to Inna's proclamation that she wanted her daughter to stay with the pack because it was safest. Understandable, since Inna had said she wanted to be a lone wolf for a while until she found some place that might feel like home. Has someone said something in particular or acted in a certain way to make you feel like you're not accepted here? That could be something that Anastasia could reach out to Lachesis and Lilya about, perhaps. To express to them that Oksana was her own person and she deserved to have that chance rather than be put on the same carpet ride as her mother.

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Oksana didn't know what she expected or didn't expect from the conversation with Ana. Maybe having someone that wasn't so close to it all knowing about it could help. The pup didn't even know if she was doing the right thing but talking to someone could help her. She could get her fears and worries out and maybe have someone tell her that she was being ridiculous or that she had valid reason to feel that way. It was in the back of her mind that her words would be taken the wrong way like her mother's and it would go badly for her like it had for Inna.

Her eyes shot up to meet Ana’s as she asked her question about someone saying or doing something. The pup shook her head, No, no one has but how could they not think bad things about me? My father deserted the pack and caused trouble with my mum until Ayti made him run away for good. Then all the stuff going on with my mum and Atyi made her go away too and it's all a big mess and I don't want to be sad and make everyone be mad at me for that and make living here like it was in Hearthwood but I can't help it, she spewed unable to stop herself. When she finally stopped talking she turned back to the river, So many wrongs have been done and no one wants to admit their blame, she said quietly but loud enough Ana could hear her, And now my mother and father are gone forever.

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Advisor Demonstration 1/3

From what the dove could tell, Sana was rather mature for her age and could see most everything that was happening at its level. She wasn't oblivious to what was going on or the details that had transpired. It was good that she was aware and conscious of all that was presented to them because it made talking to her much better. Anastasia had a good idea as to where the faults lay and with whom, but it was easier to gather the idea rather than to point fingers no matter how many or who she pointed them at. I will make it clear that I'm not taking anyone's side but my own. I'm here to help and guide, make this easier for all parties. Sana was surely mature enough to know that Anastasia wasn't going to pick sides no matter her relation to anyone. That was why she was trying to stretch and pull her ears to each party.

Though, it was a little disappointing that Sana assumed that everyone didn't accept her when no proof was given to that. I don't think it is very fair to assume that you're not accepted here, she issued carefully because she didn't want Sana to take a step back and decide that Anastasia wasn't worth talking to. She was here to deal the truth and make light, that was all. Everyone has made their mistakes. I think it only seems fair that you be allowed to express your emotions, though. She inhaled and exhaled, trying to be as sure as she could be about her choice of words. I think that you should tell Lachesis how you feel. You don't have to do it immediately but it might be good to tell Lachesis how you feel. It was an option in the very least and Anastasia wasn't going to force her to but it seemed that Sana had assumed that the rest of the pack didn't appreciate her company because of her mother's mistakes and the way it was handled.

(This post was last modified: Feb 21, 2018, 06:18 AM by Anastasia.)

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Oksana wished more than anything that things could change and her mother could come to live with them. She wasn't stupid she understood that her mother would either never be welcome back or wouldn't ever come back. Ayti had made it so that happened, she wished she was big enough and strong enough to show him what he'd done. Any further she would have gone with that though was interrupted when Ana spoke again. I understand and please don't be mad but what do you think you can do to help? She thought it was a valid question. When nothing had been resolved besides getting rid of her mother instead of helping her what else was there to do. Sometimes just knowing what she did it made her question if she should even trust these wolves.

As Ana spoke about it not being fair to assume how others felt about her. Oksana's head tilted to the side thoughtfully, “I suppose you're right. I guess I'm letting my worries and fears get the better of me?” Oksana let her gaze drop to her paws, in some ways she'd always felt the outcast. That feeling had gotten worse once her mother was gone. It was like without knowing it Inna had kept her from seeing it but now she didn't have her mother to do that for her anymore and it became worse. “Do you think I'm an embarrassment to the pack?” She asked wondering what Ana thought. When expressing her emotions was brought up Oksana couldn't help but scoff, this was something she couldn't agree with. “My mother was punished for expressing her emotions.” It was a simple as that the way Oksana saw it. Then the pale woman spoke of her talking to Lachesis about how she felt, Oksana shook her head. “I don't think it's a good idea and I don't want to bother him. He came to the surge to get away from my mother and all the bad things that happened. To talk to him about how I feel would only make it pointless for us to have left Hearthwood. I've drug the problems we had with me.” It hadn't been purposefully and she was doing everything she could to keep her emotions from infecting the pack but Ana had asked.

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Advisor Demonstration 2/3

Anastasia nodded her head, aware that it was natural for Sana to question what there was that the dove could do for her. For all of them, really. There was no true or clear answer to give the young child but she was going to try to make things easier for everyone. That had always been a goal in her life was to make sure that there was peace amongst the pack and those she might call friends. Inna seemed a good soul and one that had broken a law and questioned Lachesis, but Ana always believed that an individual was entitled to their feelings. At best, I can help make peace. As foolish as it may sound to some, I believe that it can be done if everyone is willing to try. Inna may not be welcome back in the Hearthwood for her transgressions but at the very least (for now) she could alleviate whatever tension lay beneath the surface.

As such, she was pleased that Sana recognized that her worries and fears were dominating her. That was what Anastasia had wanted to see was for the young girl to see it from the outside. That if there was no proof of the pack looking at her through binoculars and accusing her of the mistakes her mother made, then she had no reason to feel that the pack looked at her any differently than they would another. Best not to let them take over, she advises rather than agrees. It was always a better idea to avoid saying that she was wrong but that she shouldn't allow herself to feel pushed against the ground.

As for speaking with Lachesis, Anastasia understood Sana's point. Perhaps the time for expressing her emotions was gone and passed. Though the dove was quick to shake her head at her wondering question. I don't believe you are an embarrassment to the pack. As everyone always seems to say - the past is the past. The only thing you can do is work for a better future. If you want to feel more respected within the pride then show them that you're in this. She pauses before giving a triumphant and encouraging smile, nodding her head. Show them who you are.

(This post was last modified: Feb 21, 2018, 06:19 AM by Anastasia.)

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The pale woman claimed that she wanted to help and after speaking with her Oksana believed that to he true. It did leave the question as to what could be done? Her mother was gone, Oksana didn't know if she still remained in the Kingswood or if she had moved on. They would have to find her or wait until she came to visit if she ever did. After what her mother had told her Oksana felt that Lachesis had written Inna off and wanted nothing else to do with her. So she couldn't see how things could be made better. I don't know if they are. I can't speak for Lachesis except for what my mother believes about him. And that she would keep to herself unless asked as it wasn't her place to go spreading her mother's words when she didn't know if there was truth to them. I can tell you that she feels very betrayed by him for more than one reason. That she would share as she felt it was important for Ana to know if she truly meant to help.

Oksana had taken the suggestion that she may have been unfair in her assumptions she took it into consideration. She hoped that it was just her fears and worries that were causing her to think the way she was but what if it wasn't? How do you keep them from taking over? She asked in hopes that maybe ana could give her some advice. Then there was the thought in the back of her mind that maybe she was like her mother and it would get the best of her.

There were many factors that led to her disagreeing about talking to Lachesis. One she didn't want to bring the problems of her mother and how she felt on to him or the pack. They had come to the surge to get away from it and she didn't want to ruin that for them. It was her burden to bare and unless they made the choice she would bare it alone. The other was after seeing how he’d handled things with Inna she was afraid it would be the same for her and she didn't want to go through that. I am trying to do that, she admitted, My mother told me that it was important to take care of my duties the best I can and to follow any rules I have been give so I'm trying my best to do that. I hope it's enough to show them that despite everything I have gone through I can still do what needs done. She wasn't sure if that was what Ana meant but it was the only way she knew to show everyone she wasn't her mother and to hopefully help them think she was different.

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Advisor Demonstration 3/3

Sometimes Anastasia felt like it was far easier to machinate than to lay low, because who wanted to lead a boring life in the safe zone? Well, she would always like to argue that she felt she had done this for most of her life but she also wasn't a huge fan of change. Especially when it affected her well-being and there was no changing that outcome without disrupting anothers life.

When it came to the happiness of her pack mates, you bet she would do what was necessary to secure their thoughts and feelings. Sana included. You should make your own conclusion about Lachesis. While she could continue to listen to her mother and hear what her mother felt, it was far easier to believe someone close to you rather than see it from another. Just because they were your mother didn't mean that they were perfect. It just meant that you were expected to follow in their footsteps. Believe what they believed so it was only natural that Sana stand behind her mother in that way.

As far as I know, she breathes, your mother broke pack law and got pregnant. Your grandmother allowed her to stay despite breaking said law. When you disappeared to, uh, the Fields? Your mother and father came looking for you and she had an attitude towards their leaders and Lachesis took their side, which your mother didn't agree with. Ana left the air open for any details to be cleared up because she was positive that there would be something that could be added or changed. Sana was mature enough to be able to handle what truth came to light, the dove was sure. So far she had managed to keep her emotions and feelings in check, as the advisor in training tried to paddle through the discrepancies.

Focus forward, and she knew that it was easier said than done but there really was no better answer. Anastasia was still fighting her own battles day in and day out but she had learned to look forward. I'm not good with change, not the kind of change that affects me emotionally anyways. I kept running away because I was scared I couldn't make it but after the move from Hearthwood, I decided I wanted to help my pack mates. So instead of focusing on me, I wanna help us. It's something as simple as focusing on something else that could help you ovecome your worries and fears. Cheesy, sure, but it had been working so far. Oksana, no matter what pack she lived in, could find her emotional strength if she didn't focus on it.

Even with the advice given, the pale dove was sure that Sana was already well on her way to doing exactly what she needed to do. Things happened for a reason - or so Anastasia tried to believe - and sometimes those things were garbage but sometimes they built you stronger, led you to certain individuals and certain scenarios that furthered you higher than before. Inna was a strong woman and Sana just as such, but the young girl needed to see it herself. I think in time, you will begin to see that your efforts have paid off. That our pack mates see you thriving despite the setbacks. That you're stronger than you know. Because she was, of that Ana was sure!

(This post was last modified: Feb 21, 2018, 06:19 AM by Anastasia.)

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Oksana had come to the conclusion that if Ana thought she could help make the situation better she would help her. It was better than trying to do it on her own, that hadn't worked in the past and she doubted it would work now. While she wished that her mother could join her in Driftwood she knew that it was unlikely. She hoped that maybe they could make it so her mother felt comfortable visiting so that she could still see her.

When the pale woman spoke of making her own conclusions about Lachesis she nodded before stating, I think I already have. I have seen enough to know that while some of my mother's opinions are off I don't think she is completely wrong either. The truth was Oksana had seen the way that Lachesis had been with her mum. It also hurt the pup that in the time they had been in the surge he had yet to check on her. She knew he was busy and she tried to accept that excuse but sometimes it was hard to.

The little Crow listened as Ana recounted what she had been told. The pup shook her head, My mum did break pack law and my grandmum did let her stay, Inna had explained all the circumstances of her birth into Hearthwood and maybe that contributed some to the way she felt now. It wasn't me they went after though, it was my mum's sister Rissy. Mum said she did behave poorly to their female lead after two of their subordinates treated her and my father rudely and implied that they didn't care about Rissy being missing. Mum never denied to me that she behaved badly at the rye border, Oksana explained, She always said that she was upset because she hadn't stepped out of rank like Lachesis said she did. Then when she tried to explain to him what had happened he wouldn't listen. She later figured out that it was because one of the rye subordinates had come and told Lachesis what happened and who my father was so he won't believe anything she says. Mum said she tried to explain to him why she didn't tell who my father was but at that point she felt it no longer mattered because he'd stopped listening to her. She didn't know if telling Ana all of that would help the woman or if it would only damage her place in the surge but she hoped that maybe the pale woman could use the information to do what she said.

Focus forward. The little Crow understood that. She had to look toward where she wanted to he in the future. Ana then went on to explain what she meant, at least that was what she gathered from what was said. So if I focus on taking care of my duties and working hard for the pack that eventually I can overcome my fears and worries? She asked so that she could make sure she understood what she was being told. She wanted to be able to not worry about what others thought about her. Do you think that would help me with my mum too? I mean I don't know if she's ever coming back and I know that I have to move on and not stay in the past. Do you think it will help me to start my new life like everyone else in the surge is doing?

Her mother had sent her to live in the surge and she knew it was up to her if she stayed or if she left. Right then she wanted to stay and try and make a life. She would be a year old soon and it was time she became her own wolf. Part of that was gaining the respect from her packmates so they didn't see her as another Inna but instead as Oksana, just Oksana. She smiled and wagged her tail when Ana said she was stronger than she knew. Do you really think so? Sometimes she didn't know if she was that strong but maybe she was and maybe one day her packmates would see that.

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I don't think that she is entirely wrong, either. Anastasia boldly stated because in most scenarios, it wasn't usually one party that was to blame. While she adored Lachesis to the moon and back, no one was perfect and it was likely that he had done what he thought was best for the pack. If he felt that by cutting Inna out of the picture that the pack would be better, then that was his opinion and as leader he was allowed to have it. However, that didn't always make it fair.

Sana's clarification of it being her sister that they had gone looking for, she nodded her head. Yes... right, she remembered now and had simply gotten it mixed up. Surpassing the the small mix up in her head to tongue, she listened to the young girl explain the situation to her. A scenario that had been told to her thrice now but one she listened to intently anyways. It was always told somewhat differently and any information she had was useful if she was going to pull some peace out of it.

I see, a bold but simple statement she gave as she thought over what had happened carefully. Each event seemed to simply escalate to the finale and it was one that not a lot of the audience could appreciate. Certainly not the victims that had fallen from grace. No, she rejected the idea that she could overcome her worries and fears by working towards her duties and her future, but you can learn to control them. Anastasia had pushed hers and seldom let them take reign, wanting to believe in the good of those around her just as she was doing now rather than punish herself for things she could not control.

While she felt that it might be wrong to mention that Anastasia had met with Inna not long after the move, she couldn't help but feel like she should give the dark girl some hope. Your mother wants you to move on and be happy, she reiterates almost exactly what her mother had relayed to her not so long ago but before she knew it she simply couldn't hold back the real key, when I saw her just after we moved, she mentioned that she might go to Oak Tree Bend where her mother has family. She also mentioned wandering, too, but I imagine the Bend is a long travel from here? Anastasia wasn't quite as used to her surroundings as she once was and hadn't ventured enough in her return to know exactly where they were upon its map.

As for being stronger than she knew, Anastasia nodded her head and blinked. Without a doubt she could say that Sana was strong of mind and of heart. Opinions would always be strong and they might never match-up, but Sana could rise of this the dove was sure. You keep doing you, Sana.

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The little Crow was surprised when Anastasia seemed to feel the same as she did about what Inna had said. Oksana didn't think of herself as foolish, she knew that some of what her mother said was jaded by how she felt about the situation but there were other things that Inna had said to her that Oksana felt were true just by her own observations. <B Do you think the others will be able to see that too? I mean I don't expect her to ever be able to come back and live here,</b> she said looking at her paws, But maybe if they felt the same as you that they would allow her to visit without worrying she will die. That was what she had understood like her mother what Ayti's threat had meant.

Oksana didn't know if it would help anything for her to explain the things that had happened. She hoped that it might but she still felt that no matter who said it those things that Inna had always tried to get the others to understand wouldn't be believed. She had finally decided that it was better to just tell it and wait to see what happened. She just hoped that she wouldn't get in trouble for it. She even worried about saying anything at all because she was bringing the past that they all wanted to forget to the surge. Part of her didn't think it was fair to her that they all were able to be happy but she had to live with having lost her mother so they could he happy.

Her head canted to the side in confusion as Ana declined what she had said. That focusing on her duties and her future in the surge could overcome her fear. How? Won't they still be able to take over if you are working on making them go away? She asked trying desperately to understand because she didn't want to he ruled by them, she did want to be happy.

Surprise was evident on the pups face when Ana started talking about her mum and what she wanted. How could she know what Inna wanted if she hadn't seen her but then Oksana remembered thinking she had smelled her mother's scent outside the border. Her mother had come to visit but hadn't seen her? She suddenly felt angry with Inna but she took a deep breath, She was here? She finally asked to confirm, She's told me some about our family but I don't know where Oak Tree Bend is. I'm worried for her if she's going to be wandering. Both my mother and father said it was dangerous for me to go with them because it was winter. Isn't it dangerous for them too? She still didn't understand why her parents would want to leave if it was so dangerous.

Oksana didn't think that she was that strong because even after the weeks since moving to the surge she was still sad about her mother. Shouldn't she be over it and moving on by this time? Her tail did wag and she did smile when Ana told her to keep doing her. I will, she promised. After all it was all she knew how to do.

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