Charred Ash Draw got a number one victory royale

Well, that had all been very interesting.

She lay in the den, still in the same spot that she and Levi passed out in. Arcus was not sure if he was awake yet, so she hadn't wanted to jostle him unnecessarily. Her head resting on her paws, her summer-green eyes wandered the small world they inhabited. As the blizzard hadn't really let up at all, more snow had fallen over the entrance. They were nearly encased in here, the den sealed up again for who knows how long, but there was still an opening the size of about a large rabbit, and the pale grey-yellow light of a snowstorm-morning spilled lazily onto the cave floor. The morning was gentle and hazy, the snow continued to fall outside, though at a pace that was far less ferocious than the one that drove them in here.

In this light things looked startlingly different. Or was it Arcus who was different? She could see the roots—the decor—hanging and little dust motes floating about. There was maybe some more loose dirt that had been knocked from the walls or the ceiling in the pack part of the den. Arcus thought the den would have looked more the same, but she would have felt way more different.

Nothing was as different or as startling as she had imagined it. It felt natural.

But the fact that it was gone, the good ole V card, that was different, that was exciting. It didn't matter that she felt very much the same, probably. This was something cool and new! And Arcus had a boyfriend. He was here, and he hadn't taken off in the middle of the night. Levi was a rulebreaker, so perhaps she should not have put it past him.

Lazily, she yawned and turned over towards him. "Morning," she breathed.

Initially, Levi had found it very easy to drift off into a rather deep sleep, curled up tight around Arcus. He woke only an hour into the slumber, however, and that's when the anxiety began to creep in. What exactly had they just done? Levi attempted to piece together what he'd observed last year, and knew that courting couples would spend a lot of time alone and then the woman would usually birth children. That was as far into detail as it really went for him though, outside of what he'd just done with Arcus.

So like, were they... married now? Were they going to be a family, with kids and everything?

It was a horrible, horrible worry to have and he didn't even know why because wasn't Arcus a perfectly nice girl, and isn't this what he was supposed to do, sooner or later? Later, later! his subconscious screamed back.

By the time dawn came and passed, however, Levi had latched onto one detail and used it to lull himself into a false sense of security. Like all illusions, it was doomed from conception (hah), but that didn't stop him one bit. Those couples always spent a lot of alone time together, like a whole month of it until the women stopped having their troubles, so maybe that's what it took. Maybe just once wasn't enough, and after all, Arcus still smelled lovely.

Levi opened one eye as he felt the woman he was cuddling shift and turn. His heart did funny flips, seeing her gem-like eyes and feeling her breath against his cheek. He twisted his neck to give a single soft lick to her muzzle, before arching backwards into a stretch. His legs stiffened and some joints even popped.

"Mornin'," he answered, and wasn't really sure what else to say. Part of him wanted to sink into the silence, to try and shake that lingering unease altogether with more sleep. There were so many questions swimming around in his stead still, though. Pregnant or not... what now?

"Uh. How're you uh. How're you feelin'?"

As his tongue moved over her muzzle a smile spread like daylight over her face. When the whole grin dawned on her face she stopped for a moment: she'd wanted Levi to wake up but now that he was up... what? Plus, Levi seemed a little... nervous? Uncomfortable? It was hard to pin it down and she wasn't sure if it her foggy brain leaping to all sorts of conclusions or what her crusty morning eyes could really perceive. But maybe it was okay, they were just getting to know each other, right?

Yet Arcus felt like she had known him awhile, her whole life maybe.

She'd known the boy just a night.

With a great, sigh like a spring gale she sighed and stretched her forelegs out in front of her without getting up, as she pretended to contemplate his question. "Mmmm.... Idunno," she said, her voice tight for a moment, "Pregnant?" Casually, slowly, she twisted her neck towards her boyfriend to give him a cautious look.

Seeing her smile helped, a lot, but then she answered and Levi felt practically slingshot back into hell. His own grin, having risen along with hers, vanished and his green eyes widened until slivers of white could be seen framing them. Inside his head, all of his thoughts crashed and tangled together, crowding and cutting each other off. Slowly, he was able to grasp at pieces and string something relatively coherent together.

If Arcus said she could tell this soon, then all Levi could do was believe her.

"Oh," he whispered. He'd thought he'd been struggling before to figure out what to say, but now he was really grasping at empty air.

Levi swallowed. It felt as though the den had shrunk over night, had the opposing walls really been this heckin' close? Nerves eating him alive, the young man finally settled on a follow up question.

"Are... are you um... are you... ready to be a mom?"

He wasn't sure which he'd prefer, that they were in the same boat on this and she could empathize with him, or that she had this much better handled and could guide him through it.

She practically bit off the tip of her tongue waiting for her boyfriend's reaction. He uttered just one tiny sound and Arcus steeled herself. The silence stretched uncomfortably between them, and she thought she could see Levi swallow with great effort. The girl remained very still, her glittering eyes flicking over the traces of his expressions.

He thought she was serious? Arcus burst out suddenly in laughter, rolling over onto her back and kicking her legs up in the air. "No! Hahha-silly. How could I be pregnant already?" It had been a mere pawful of hours and she had received better family planning education than that. She rolled back over to look at him. "You should have seen your face."

"You don't gotta be so serious."

(This post was last modified: Mar 28, 2021, 06:34 PM by Maugrim.)

Her laughter was jarring, as unexpected as @Viorel's had been that day by the river that had preluded this misadventure. Likewise, it caused him to feel embarrassment, his cheeks heating up and prickling beneath his cream-colored fur. Continuously bombarded by adjacent and opposing feelings and thoughts, it was very clear in his eyes that he was struggling to compute. Had he felt there was time, he would've tried to grab hold of each and every one, recognize it and understand it before moving to the next. Arcus' big green eyes were like lead weights upon his shoulders, however, and he felt rushed to come up with a response.

Nervous and half-hearted, Levi attempted to chuckle along. It felt like he was forcing a smile, but it certainly came across as more of a grimace. Nothing about this moment felt natural much less comfortable, and he wanted so badly to go back to @Sawyer and curl up in their tree house, warm and content and oblivious to responsibility and expectations.

Get a grip, slick, she's just goofing around!

"S-sorry. I just um," he paused a moment, before deciding that since everything else was failing him, Levi might as well just blurt out the honest truth.

"This is... all of this is just, really new to me. Like um, I don't uh," wow this was hard to say, and he wasn't even sure why, everyone had to learn at some point, right? Just, preferably before already having done it. He knew that, and his absolute inability to navigate this morning after situation much less comprehend the repercussions of the night only hammered into his head further that he should not have gone so far.

Even if in the moment it had felt really good. The kind of good that you kept thinking about even when you didn't want to, even when you knew it wasn't good for you.

Spit it out. Levi's ears folded down, "I don't even. Really uh. Know how uhhhhh, howitworks."

He hoped so dearly that she knew what he meant so that he wouldn't have to break it down further.

From Levi’s reaction it was as if Arcus had slapped him, told him he had shit on his foot, or that he was stupid. Her laughter abruptly faded and her features tightened. She didn’t want him to feel bad, and it was pretty painful listening to him stutter out an apology and weigh his response so carefully. Arcus didn’t want him to be upset but she found herself equally frustrated wondering where this was coming from. He was just fine a second ago and now he was like a puddle of syllables.

If “it” was new to him, then it was new her her too. Did he realize that? She’d told him just last night how she’d never hung out alone with a boy before. Then they had taken it even further and obviously she hadn’t done that before. Maybe he was just more scared of it than she was. Guys didn’t really like to be vulnerable, she reminded herself. At least her dad and Jasper were kind of like that.

”Relax, it was a joke,” she said with a snort, placing her pale brown paw on his foreleg. She tried to smile at him, ”I don’t know how it works either. Does that matter?”

”What are we even talking about here?” Sex? Pregnancy? Dating?

Nope, that didn't work either. Levi felt his throat constrict as he caused her laughter to die. A joke, right, but wasn't it also totally possible? He supposed he didn't really know what he wanted Arcus to say to make him feel better, maybe there wasn't anything that could be said. Maybe it was too late because it was already done.

Yet there she remained, cool as a cucumber while he couldn't stop freaking out. He didn't want to be a dad. He didn't want to be married.

Does that matter? she asked, and he wanted to nod his head furiously up and down, yes!, because this not knowing was apparently eating him up, and it had only been hours. When would they know for sure? Tomorrow? Days from now? Weeks?! Would he even be able to find Sawyer and River now, or was he stuck here in the middle of nowhere, following after Arcus wondering when she was gonna start popping out children?

He discovered that he did not find comfort in her not having all the answers either, because while they might be in the same boat they were very clearly not on the same page about how to operate it.

"I'm not ready to be a dad," he murmured, finally leaning away from her, so much so that a wall of cool earthy air rose up between them.

"I, I think I made a mistake."

Levi got onto his paws, and began to inch toward the den's opening. To heck with the weather outside, he needed to get away. At least for a moment.

"I um. I need to pee..."

(This post was last modified: Mar 29, 2021, 08:07 PM by Leviticus.)