Sanguine Cove Its almost time to say goodbye

I think I need help, cuz I'm drowning in myself

For @Nash<3

Everyday was getting more and more difficult. The warming weather wasn't bringing its usual relief and a whisper deep within her soul told her it was almost time to say goodbye. It pained her to think about but she knew they would all be just fine without her. Her more grey than black muzzle pulled back in a small smile. They had accomplished so much and their numbers were bolstered once more. With more children, well grandchildren and great grandchildren now in her case. A small sigh was given in acknowledgement that these youngin's, who she already loved so much, would not be greeted by her in the physical world. Never being a super religious or spiritual woman Moon still liked to believe that there was something for after. Where Tagg, their unborn children, her parents, Namid, Tulip and everyone she'd ever lost would be waiting for her. And that one day when its time for those who she's leaving behind she'll be waiting to greet them once again.

Her large paws delicately made their way to the lake shore where she settled into a warm sunny patch of grass. She tilted her head back and gave a call for her inky son. In her younger days she would have sought him out but now? Now she was tired just from that short walk from the den to the lake. It was time for him to know what her soul has been whispering to her. She wouldn't and couldn't just leaving him without a warning. Not with a litter so close to being born. She didn't know when exactly but knew it was going to be soon...very soon.

Word Count: 278

The days were growing longer and his wife was growing wider and the old excitement of a new litter was creeping up on him. Even though he'd done this before, twice now, Nash couldn't wait to meet his newest children. He wondered what they'd be like, if they would be wandering souls like his middle daughter or steadfast like his youngest. He wondered if Matos would have any brothers or remain the only son. So much potential, and he and Aquene hadn't yet decided on a name...

He was loathe to wander too far from the den, ready to be at his wife's side at a moment's notice. She was so tired all the time now... He worried.

When he heard his mother's call he was quick to rise and trot toward her, ears flicking in apprehension. There was something in her voice that sent a trickle of unease down his spine, a breath of chill wind from winter's heart. "Hey mom," he said gently as he reached her, running his nose across the top of her head and licking her ear affectionately.

"Oh, it won't rain all the time, The sky won't fall forever, And though the night seems long, Your tears won't fall forever."

Unsurprisingly, she wouldn't have to wait long for him as her youngest son answered her call swiftly. A small smile crept onto her more salt than pepper maw at his arrival. She had always enjoyed the company of her children for they held and extra special place in her heart. His affectionate greeting was met with a hum within her chest. "Hello love." she responded gently and lovingly, taking a moment to decide whether to cut right to the chase or beat around the bush a bit.

She chose the former. A few moments of silence passed between them before she started with a small sigh. "It's no secret that I'm no longer gettin' old but that I already am..." she paused her ghostly gaze moving from his familiar emerald to the cool blue of the lake. There was no easy way of saying what's in her heart, bones and soul. "There's been a whispering deep within me. I think its yer father callin' me..." the elderly Eastfall woman trailed off once more to let Nash process the information she had just given him. She had had more time to process while he hadnt. She knew it wouldnt be easy for him but she couldnt just leave, not like Tulip, not that it was her fault. Moon was much older than her adopted daughter, something she had been blessed with after a lifetime of trauma and losses. But sadly all good things had to come to an end.

 

Word Count: 248

Nash settled beside his mother, close enough for their fur to brush without fully leaning into her side. Still his unease weighed on his shoulders, and soon she spoke and he knew why. He listened quietly, wanting desperately to tease and sooth "no you're not" but he kept his mouth shut, eyes on the ground between his paws.

He knew this time was coming. How could it not be? In a few weeks she would be ten, an age so few wolves made it to. She'd met so many grand children, seen the loss of so many loved ones... and still had so much knowledge to impart. The time thumped on with the beating of his heart and it wasn't enough - would never be enough.

He swallowed. "I know," he murmured not having the heart to tell her he'd noticed the stiffness in her bones, how much she slept. He could see it in her eyes, in the set of her shoulders. She wasn't old, she was nearly ancient, and time caught up to them all.

"Oh, it won't rain all the time, The sky won't fall forever, And though the night seems long, Your tears won't fall forever."

{ooc}I cant get through these without tearing up

A single silver dusted ear flicked towards his quiet admission and her heart just shattered. Never, never had she ever wanted to be the cause of her family's pain. It was her role in life to protect them, to chase away the badness, and ensure their happiness. And now? Now she was the source of it. Maybe she shouldn't have told him...maybe her adoptive daughter had the right idea, to not burden anyone with this knowledge. Maybe she was selfish for not wanting to be alone at the end...

Her head dropped, her chin pulling closer to her chest as her mercury gaze stared at her large paws and tiny pebbles of the shore beneath them. From a distance, they looked like twins, the only difference would be the ever growing silver fade through her aging pelt. One heartbeat, two heartbeats, three...she opened her maw to speak several times but no words came out. This was an impossible conversation, but it had to be had.

"I'm sorry..."she finally began "to be puttin' this on ya...". She had had a game plan going into this, about what to say. But as soon as she heard his broken voice that all went right out the window. Still looking to the shore beneath them she spoke quietly unsure what else to say, "I'd like to rest with yer father."

Word Count: 226

He knew his mother was hurting. Not just the aches and pains of growing older, but he couldn't imagine feeling his own demise creeping up in his bones. He wondered if he'd live that long, or if the mountain would claim him before then. He wondered if he'd sense it.

He smiled sadly and ducked his head into Moon's neck, trying to comfort her with the nuzzle. "Don't be," he murmured. "I'm here for whatever you need. You won't be alone."

And then she shared her purpose for seeking him out and he leaned back just enough to look at her. His smile softened further. "I couldn't imagine it any other way." While Sanguine Cove had been their home for several years now, he knew his birthplace still held her heart. "I can prepare stones, if you'd like to be buried like he was."

"Oh, it won't rain all the time, The sky won't fall forever, And though the night seems long, Your tears won't fall forever."

The aging mother leaned into the touch her son provided, savoring the warmth of it. His words filled her with a similar warmth in her heart, thawing guilt's icy hold on it. She hadnt realized how badly she needed to physically hear those words. Sure she wanted someone there at the end but to have him say he'd be there was everything. It gave her the courage to tell him where she'd like her final resting place to be. She missed her husband dearly. She knew he'd been with her all these years and had pieces of him from their children and grandchildren, but she needed him.

Mercury met emerald (that piece of Tagg) as Nash leaned back to look at her, a soft smile pulled at his inky lips. "I couldn't imagine it any other way." The statement pulled a soft smile of her own salt and pepper maw, it was how it was meant to be...to be home. His offer to prepare stones for her burial once more caused the guilt to wash over her. Aquene was close to giving birth and Magg wasn't far behind her, Nash should be here close by...why did she choose this? "Maybe one of the boy's can help so that ya aren't far from Aquene or Magg." She offered quietly. Had she had more strength she would collect them herself if that meant Nash wouldn't be burdened.

Word Count: 238