The Wildwood the audience knows the truth

Various events had Borden currently on edge: Raigo’s illness and recovery, Midnight Plateau’s acquisition of new pack members, the sighting of a peculiar white wolf on the Mountain who never seemed to stray from Alexander’s side... Day after day he found himself desperately seeking ways to avoid running into any of them – Alexander, Weldering, Jayseyek, Atiris, Adonia, that white wolf often seen with his superior… As much as he dared, he tried to keep them away, from getting too close if they managed to catch sight of him for even a few moments. He was always “busy,” on-patrol or standing guard, always making excuses that he had no time to talk or even stop for a bit. Currently, he had no intentions of returning to his post, that little snow-covered ledge just a stone’s throw from the pack den.

A late afternoon like this one, consisting of a cloudy sky with no expectations of a snow storm, called for exploration; and, exploration called for further investigating the pieces of Relic Lore he had not yet familiarized himself with. He desperately wanted to check up on Vlarindara and Raigo, but since the duo had been taken care of in the past week and his pack duties never ceased to get the best of him, he instead stayed within range of the Dire Mountain knowing that he wouldn’t have time to visit them without spending the night at their new den. Frustration and aggravation settled in his chest; if it didn’t take a day to traverse the forest, he would have left everything behind in a heartbeat. Walking quietly through the snow, he exhaled in an exasperated manner. From the markers he had identified and passed by only moments ago, he knew if he kept patrolling along his usual path he could stumble into Bramble Falls – a place he had no desire to visit.

Noting his location, he stopped in his tracks and slowly turned around, dragging his paws through the prints he had already made. His footfalls were heavy as if he were dragging around a ball-and-chain from one of his hind ankles. Pale gold eyes stared down at the snow in longing; his triangular ears were folded back in thought. After some time, he came to rest alongside a cluster of snow-covered boulders one of which had cracked perfectly down the middle. This simple display of stones was just one of his landmarks that indicated the edge of Midnight Plateau’s terrain.

Idly lowering himself into the snow, he sat and closed his eyes.

A-B-R-A-C-A-D-A-B-R-A
A-B-R-A-C-A-D-A-B-R
A-B-R-A-C-A-D-A-B
A-B-R-A-C-A-D-A
A-B-R-A-C-A…

Shaking his head, he let out an annoyed growl; meditating wasn’t helping him clear his head at all. As soon as he became aware of the world around him, his agitation was quick to return. Usually the simple string of letters – which his uncle had taught him to ward off unwanted stress – helped him relax, but he still found himself tense, tired, and utterly bored... All he felt like doing was running – around the territory, up and around the mountain side, or even away from the mountain itself, he didn’t care – as long as he could work out the restlessness in his bones, he could truly be at ease… at peace... with himself.

His need for adventure, for an afternoon without responsibilities, was starting to take hold of him. It had only been a mere week or so since he had last been away, but it was no surprise when he found himself yearning for the company of towering trees, dense hedges, wide fields and hidden glades – anything that sharply contrasted to the cold, hard landscape that embodied Mount Dire’s majestic shape. His front paws slid forward and he reclined onto his stomach, staring vacantly towards the edge of the forest in the distance. His eyes narrowed as he flicked his tail, silently daring anything or anyone to step foot over the invisible territory line he was upholding. Like effluvium from a barrel of toxic waste, his ragged breath escaped his slightly open jowls, all he needed was something to make or break his day.

Well, what do you want from me?

Jayse was going insane. Joining a pack was suppose to rid her of the loneliness, but instead it plagued her like a disease. Now she had to stay upon the mountain, like a vast prison, look down upon the world as it moved on. Knowing she should not stray from it's boundries, because she felt the need to protect her home. She was high on guard after the wolf Ozera had come in the hours of dawn, because who knew what else would sneak around. So day after day she did her own runabouts, coming in little to no contact. At first sure she didn't run into anyone intentionally, but not having conversation, or interaction was getting to the social creture. The pack was more like a group of hermit crabs, in there own shells. She had noticed the presence of a new,lovely white female, who Alexander seemed close to. But again, she knew very little of her bold leader except for when she had run into Ozera. Even, then it was little information. Ozera actually was the only wolf, she knew of in the pack. Well and Borden but she honestly didn't know that much about him, he was non-existent as well. The nagging feeling something troubled him, always picked at the back of her mind. But he seemed to avoid her, and she no better wanted to see him, feeling she would only make things worse. Perhaps her incompedency, and simple lack of deceny she had shown him had pushed him away. She could imagine that, and heaved a weary sigh. The sky had darkened more so, and snow clouds were upon the lands she was only leaving the falls now,after visiting with the Swift River wolf, heading for home. New thoughts in her head, setting deep tracks in the snow, she was going to head up the mountain when something hissed, and snarled behind her. Pivoting about, she took a few steps backward, eyes darting around the shadowed woods. First in the trees, then to their roots, and there she saw what looked like a minature bear. A yard infront of her, puffed up in annoyance, snarling with it's thick jowls, but she knew it was not a bear, but a wolverine. A low growl cut sharp from her throat, ears twisted back upon her head. She had done nothing to the creature, there for logicly it didn't like her of coarse, but she wasn't going to turn her back on it. Though she wished she could abscond. Great, maybe it's hungry and decided your it's next meal. She knew the little weasels could take on prey much larger, with their quick movements, and strong jaws. So much for another boring night. It took a few steps foreward, snapping it's teeth. A fierce bark, own menacing snarl came through her teeth, daring it to pounce. If the damn little thing got it's jaws around her, she doubted she could pry it off. Maybe she could intimidate it, then again she knew wolverines for taking on bears for their kills. Duo, colored eyes glanced around wondering if it had it's dinner around, and only guarding it. She did not see nor smell anything. It stepped closer, not the slightest bit scared. Muscles tightened, keeping her head tucked she snarled one more time.The wolverine, pounced heading straight for her throat. She veered back, out if it's reach, snapping her own jaws at it's face. Missing by centimeters, the two predators started to circle. The wolverine made another leap, grabbing where shoulder met neck on her left side. It's bite was hard, but she curled head, jaws grabbing for it's tender throat. Pulling hard upon it, it took only a seconds for it to let go. It's claws raked against her jaw, and throat but teeth only dug deeper, warm blood pooling into her mouth. Tight grip, it tried to snap it's teeth into her, but she jerked the little beast sideways, snaping his neck with his own weight. It twitched in her reach, and she dared not let it go. A few minutes, and it was limp. She dropped it's body, huge breaths coming in and out of open mouth. Nostrils breathed in the heavy scent of blood, eyes looking through the woodlands making sure nothing else was there. The high she been on started dropping, she could feel her wounds. Pressing nose to her shoulder, she started licking the blood from her thick, silver coat. Then worked at her torso, and lips, wipping her cheeks against the cold snow. She couldn't exactly clean her chin, but she'd worry about it later. Wouldn't Dyami be proud, she'd finally killed something that could bite back. She smiled, a sad smile wishing she could speak to him. Instinctively she walked around where the wolverine had come from, looking for a reason for attack, but instead she discovered the scent of someone she knew floating in the air. Borden? Breathing in deeply, the scent was fresh, and she would have known it any where. She swallowed, wondering what he was doing and if she should leave him be. Smartly grinning with an idea, she returned to her kill. Jaws clasped the thick, dark fur tightly for the sucker was much heavier then a rabit, but she had in mind to take it to her friend. His scent directing her coarse, she found his tracks and started following them. Hoping he wasn't to deep in the Wildwood because she could end up lost in the night. Head high, and her kill in tow she managed a jog, keeping a sharp look out for the familiar wolf. It took a little longer then normal, she had to keep her head and haunches high to balance the weight. Really was comical, she looked liked she was trying to carry an oversized pup, that should be walking. The blood was what said other wise. Nothing would stop her, once she set her mind to it. A gathering of boulders caught her attention, there was an odd cracked one in the bundle, she was taking a closer look when she saw him. Laying down surpisingly, eyes opened not a surpise. A little leary, she paced foreward slowly, like a messenger with a peace offering afraid of being shot. His expression was not readable, but she smiled wide, knowing it was him, and actually happy to see him. Closing the distance she dropped the wolverine at his paws. "I caught this for you." She chimed happily, tail beating the air behind her, a proud smile on her face. lost your balance on a tight rope. lost your mind trying to get it back.

(This post was last modified: Feb 05, 2011, 04:59 PM by Jaysyek.)

O O C | Edited for visually addressing Jayse and word mix-ups lolol. /fail.

Descending from his throne of world-weariness, the beta glanced down at his paws. He angled his wrists, pressing his dark claws into the snow, one and then the other, back and forth. The amusement only lasted for a few seconds though for the approach of something or someone caused him to draw his gaze upwards and towards what stood beyond his immediate surroundings. The tinge of blood in the air caused his eyes to widen in a sort of panic. Something vulnerable had stumbled this way to help feed the pack recoup from the recent storm, or… His stomach gave a sickening jolt. Maybe someone had been hurt… However, as soon as his gaze rested upon a familiar white wolf – whose eyes sported not one but two hues – he breathed a sigh of relief. Jaysyek. She approached him cautiously and he had expected her to ask what was wrong or what had caused him to rest in this particular place, but instead she dropped whatever she had found (What was that? A bear cub? A weak wolf pup?) and chirped that she had caught this… beast-thing… for him. His eyes locked on the dead creature, thoroughly bewildered.

Only when he fully figured that the creature before him was wolverine did he shuffle back in shock. Whoa… Whoa, whoa, whoa... He glanced back up at her, taking in her proud grin. It took him a moment to find his voice. ”Impressive,” he complimented her, somewhat at a loss for words. ”Thank you.”

Venturing to continue conversing with her could not have come at a better time. Perhaps it wasn’t boredom or being tired of the mountain after all. Perhaps it was simply loneliness and the feeling wasn’t applied to just missing Vlarindara, but rather his pack. A simple smile from Jayse brought him to realize he had been unreasonable in his decisions to keep them away for this long. A smile curled upwards along his muzzle and the cheerfulness he was drawing from her company extended far enough to glimmer over his eyes and offer a friendly tail wag. ”So, what could have possibly brought you to this end of the mountain?” he mused. ”Surely not the opportunity of hunting down ferocious wolverines, hmm?”

Eyebrows rising, he gave her a sly grin; he was obviously impressed. He had never known anyone, not even his tank-like father, to bring down a wolverine. The bulky brutes were often too ferocious to be even considered as meals - at least the ones from Bertram Valley, where he had hailed from, were. For a moment, he wondered if she would stay and perhaps share a bite or two with him; the mass of the creature was far too much for just one.

(This post was last modified: Feb 05, 2011, 11:03 PM by Borden.)

Well, what do you want from me?

Jayse laughed, really hard actually upon his confused face. She of coarse would have done the same, as it wasn't exactly something anyone packed around- not to mention she was wandering in the middle of no where, the time getting late with it. Tongue lolled past her lips, ribs rising and falling as she caught her breath. The wolverine was at least fourteen or fifteen pounds. Or her guess. His surpise was noted, and she only grinned further because for once Jayse Enap had surprised Borden. Something she had wanted to accomplish for some time. Pride beat in her heart, she had been expecting him to freak out about the whole notion, so she enjoyed his compliment. Shrugging her shoulders she sat in the snow, giving her body the rest it craved. "Your welcome." Simply stated, breath came in large white puffs, she felt a little to winded, and leery to speak more. Laying down upon her stomach she surveyed the surroundings, wondering how far into the woods they were. Daringly, eyes wandered to his face searching his gaze. Trying to read him. Happy, maybe he was, his tail beat assuring her. Now, to keep it that way. What luck, though. He was in a good mood, and she to. She had greatly missed his company. Lightly laughing for she had never seen such a grin, sides slowed motion, and she licked over her lips. "Actually, I was at the falls going to head for home, when that," Pointing to it with her snout, "decided it wanted a late night snack. Or really I think I just pissed it off without trying, as I have a knack for doing that. " She said, wrinkling her nose with a wink. Staring into the distance, she backtracked in her mind. "After I made sure it was dead I tried to see if it had been guarding something. That's when I found your scent, and decided I had to come find you." Half grinning, she couldn't believe she had manged to kill the creature, but better it then her. It'd probably been more out of luck, a young one without a good head. What she really couldn't believe was how he'd been out here, and wasn't running from the sight of her. Glancing his way, her voice hinted with interest she asked,"And what about you. What are you doing out here, in the snow by a pile of rocks?" The mountain she felt was still in the direction she'd come, and it didn't seem like him to not be doing something. Then again, it was good to see him not doing anything as she doubted he did much for himself, or slowed down. It wasn't important it, it was nice just to be in familiar compnay. lost your balance on a tight rope. lost your mind trying to get it back.

O O C | I have just discovered that I keep spelling Jayse’s name wrong… Sorryyy. :x

Carefully gazing over the lifeless creature, Borden slowly settled back down onto his stomach where he had been laying before she arrived. He listened as she told him about how she happened to stumble into the wolverine, nodding when she also mentioned that she had crossed his path, following it until she found him. ”Ah,” he replied, chuckling as he caught her wink. ”And what about you. What are you doing out here, in the snow by a pile of rocks?” She turned to look at him and he met her gaze before casting it off into the distance where she had been staring before. ”Nothing in particular,” he answered quietly.

Actually, I was just walking about, making my usual rounds, and I just didn’t feel like going to the Falls so I retraced my steps back here.” The truth was plain and simple, and he hoped she didn’t mind. It probably would have been better to say he had been doing something more animated like resting after chasing off an unwelcome nomadic wolf or some other random story but his mind wasn’t really up for anything whimsical. ”This is one of the few places I tend to stop at, so I figured why not watch the territory from here for a bit?”

Peering at her from the corner of his eye before glancing back at her, he nudged the wolverine corpse slightly in her direction. ”How was your day?” he then asked. ”Find anything… interesting? Have you eaten yet?” His attempts for small talk or casual conversation were somewhat on the weak side and it seemingly showed in his selection of questions and slightly hesitant tone of voice.

Evening had already begun to fall and just as he noted the dull blue-gray color reflecting back on Jayse’s fur he realized how long he had been laying there. He then noticed the faint stain of blood on her chin. One of his ears folded back in concern; he wished he had noticed it earlier or at least asked her how she was before he had inquired about anything else. ”It… The wolverine didn’t get ya too badly did it?”

Well, what do you want from me?

ooc; actually i was going to spell her name with two e's, then i dropped it thinking it looked better with out. to me either is correct so no worries. :) The she wolf stared off into the wildwood, it was much more comfertable atmosphere, and she greatly welcomed it. Especially the sound of his laugh. Ears, rotated softly when he answered her question. She was listening intently, and nodded. She'd figured he'd walked here on the way to something, and the answer sastisfied her. Eyes shifted across the snow, stateing he stopped here often. So he knew the place well. She envied him for knowing the place so well, she was still a little fearful of being where she should not. Therefore she didn't venture from from the mountain. "It is very pretty here." She breathed, after her take on the view. Moving her eyes to his. Here day? It had started out all right, she'd been bored a great deal of it. Until she'd went to the falls for a new view. "I guess my day was all right. I meet the Swift River Leader." She stated it indifferently, as if it was no real news, nor exciting. She had a far-off look. The leader had stirred her up, questioning everything. She had never been so questioned, but it had been enlightening, and forced her to use her mind. The meeting had livened up her day. How sad though, she'd talk more with him then her own leader. Wrapping tail tight around her haunches, she smiled a worn smile at his list of quesitons. "No, I have not eaten, but if you share with me you get first bites." She saw that as fair, and hoped he wouldn't argue. First she'd given it to him, and second he did out rank her. She said she'd eat, what was with him trying to feed her all the time? She inwardly smiled it must be a Borden thing, how he had to be polite. She still wasn't use to it, but she was not giong to protest or upset him. His company was like night and day or something like that after her visit today. His kindness and warmth, she was grateful for. Silver face wrinkled with worry, as he asked about the attack. "I probably look awful don't I?" She asked, because her concern was for her gruesome appearence. She could see him thinking it was worse then it was, if she had forgot a lot of the blood. Tongue licked over her jowls. She'd tried to clean up, so she didn't look attacked but her tongue was only so long. His concern though, she felt perfectly fine. The wounds had stopped bleeding, and might be felt tomorow. She was simply happy, she was not laying somewhere with a wolverine eating her. " It bit me once, and scratched my throat. But I'm fine." She smiled, trying to back up the facts. She knew it could have ended a lot worse. lost your balance on a tight rope. lost your mind trying to get it back.

(This post was last modified: Feb 06, 2011, 04:16 PM by Jaysyek.)

Paws poked at the wolverine cautiously as if he were fearful it would stand right back up and swipe at him. Borden laid his eyes on the corpse and though he was eyeing it in a stern manner, he still listened as she replied. She had met Swift River’s leader… He wondered if the alpha had spoken just as formally to her as he had a few months ago when he came to the Mountain of Dire to ask how Midnight Plateau was faring. The question lingered on his tongue but the dry tone in her voice made him think twice before asking about their meeting. Maybe it hadn’t been pleasant...

Reclined comfortably on his stomach, Borden continued to smile quietly, absorbing her words as she answered. A twinge of hunger grabbed hold of his gut, but he gave her every bit of his attention, polite and genuinely interested. When she stated that she hadn’t eaten and that he would have to have the first bites, his smile broadened. He nodded and nudged the large ball of fur over so it rested between them. Insisting that she started, he figured, would have been somewhat rude if she had caught it for him in the first place.

Overhead, a flock of birds flew past, but only one of his ears twitched. Reacting to his words concerning the blood that tainted her chin, he instantly shook his head. ”Awful? Never,” he stated. His head lowered just slightly to examine her throat; perhaps its claws had merely grazed her but didn’t break the skin. He wasn’t so sure of the thought of the aftermath of being attacked by a wolverine but her affirmation that she was fine had him convinced. ”As long as you’re fine, then that’s all that matters.” Another warm smile settled on his features before he glanced over the dark chocolate pelt of Jayse’s attacker. First bites, his mind echoed. The pair of words was enough to make him recall one of the several events in which he had been scolded for not waiting his turn at a family meal. He whisked the memory away and lowered his head after not having any other questions to interrogate her with. If there was a time to start enjoying the meal before them, he figured right about now would be a perfect time for it.

Piercing the now icy skin, he expertly began to skin his companion’s catch, easily exposing its scarlet muscles. Once he had rolled it over to expose its vulnerable underbelly a bit more, he picked at the side of a still-hidden rib and his tongue slid over his onyx lips, staining his white muzzle with the mustelid’s blood. ”Well, here’s to Jaysyek, fearless wolverine hunter,” he chuckled, making a toast to her. A dip of his head signaled that he was allowing her to pitch in and have her share. ”And to Midnight Plateau...” Sure, why not… If the couple of friends had something to ‘toast’ to, they might as well celebrate the pack – as well as their generous territory – that had taken them both in over the season.

Well, what do you want from me?

Bursting out in laughter, it came out light and truelly gay. She could not help it, but understood why he wished to make certain the creature was dead. She had been the same way, not letting it go for a time. "Borden, I promise it's dead or I'm sure I'd be missing a chunk, and you would have heard some terrible noise." The silver female chuckled twice more, then let it die to silent breaths. The fact she'd met the leader didn't bring much attention, and she preffered it that way. It had not been bad, but something she was still wrapping her brain around to talk about yet. Borden seemed to pick up on it, and it made her all the more thankful to know him. Finally, she had the sense of home regaining. The birds flew by, and she watched them zoom into the distance. Must be headed for shelter, she assumed looking down upon her companion. A sweet smile swept on black lips, glad she didn't look like bloodzilla after all, and the fact he believed her. The last thing she wanted to be was a worry. It made her guilty when someone worried about her. A mindful expression, she met his gold eyes. "Why are you so happy today?" The question was pure wonderment, as days after she had arrived he seemed withdrawn, or just gone. Something was different. She hadn't thought she was this good at cheering someone up. She'd failed miserably last time she'd tried. Eager, she was not for his answer and watched him delicately peel the hide from flesh. Some wolves did not eat carnivores, and personally she never had because she'd never come in contact with a dead one. Eyebrows crinkled with bother for maybe it wouldn't taste good. Once he took a taste, the muscles in her face relaxed. A cringe of embarrasement caused her to lose face for a second, she let out a short laugh to hide it. Then grinned broadly, sensing her brother might have said the same words to her. "Here, here." She echoed in an alto pitch, calling after his toast. Miss Enap had made a sensible choice in Midnight Plateau. Pause, she let him gain a mouthful till she reached out, ripping a good piece of the animal. It was big enough to keep her busy chewing, as she wouldn't have to go back for more right away. Between the two of them it would placate their apetite. Once she started lolling the meat around in her gums it really didn't taste that bad. Different, but not bad. A delicacy she wanted to be her first and last taste of. A few good chews, and swallows she cleaned her face. "Run into any more strangers?" The girl didn't mean much by her question, a casually way of asking about his day she supposed. lost your balance on a tight rope. lost your mind trying to get it back.

Happy… Happiness… The Great Plains wolf gazed down at the wolverine, not even finding the taste of its flesh much different than anything else he’s ever tasted. It’s blood might’ve been a bit more metallic, but he didn’t mind. He swallowed another sinewy piece before a coy smile formed along his lips. ”Why are you so happy today?” her question repeated in his ears. ”I… I’m not quite sure,” he admitted. It could have been anything really – the meal before him, the fact that his patrol paths had been traversed without any interruption, the comfort that Raigo had been taken care of – but he decided on one thing. ”I’d like to think it’s the good company though.”

Apart from the restlessness, it was indeed a fact that he was in a pretty good mood overall. Things – namely whatever was left of the worry he had for Vlarindara and Raigo, and adjusting his temper and mood swings – seemed to be sorting themselves out now and the stress he had acquired from December and January had dissolved right after Jayse and their other kin joined Midnight Plateau. Just knowing that there were others running about the territory, guarding it, made him feel more at ease, more personable even or so it seemed. Having more sets of eyes and ears about cut him some slack, which he liked, but it often left him bored, hence his useless bouts of agitation. Nevertheless, he had to owe it to Jayse that it was mostly her infectious laughter, smiles, and tail wags that perked him up.

The tone of her voice, especially her initial greeting that she had caught him something to eat, was enough to draw him from the doldrums. His tail waved about slowly behind him as she asked him another question. ”Run into any more strangers?” Running his tongue over his lips, he thought for a moment. No… Wait… Yeah… Well, not formally but still… He looked to her after quickly surveying the forest’s edge and searching the foot of the mountain at their backs. No one. Hopefully. ”Yeahhh, kinda?” he replied, his tone curling with uncertainty at the addition of the second word. ”I… noticed the other day and again early this morning that we seem to have acquired another member. Both times I saw them they were with Alexander.” His brows furrowed and he figured he might as well ask her while they were still on the topic. ”Have you seen ‘em or met ‘em by chance?” The foreigner was probably about his size and he was certain it wasn’t any of the white wolves he knew; if it had been, he would have tried to skulk about behind the pair instead of instantly dashing down the stony paths when he finally felt like one of them would turn around or at least learn of his presence.

Well, what do you want from me?

This must be what it was like in his presence without him on edge. She enjoyed the difference actually. Preffered it, because they were both in better spirits. If that was a good term to describe them now. He was so much more full of surprises, with his quirky smiles, and laughing. She tried to subdue a grin, she failed miserably, letting it stick to her lips like glue. Because he admitted he was not sure of his happiness. She had thought there was some kind of change in him, and was only intrigued by it's coming about. She did not laugh when spoken of as good company. Or so he'd think. He had not lost his charm after all. She shook her head, slightly disagreeing. -as if that would break the enchanment she felt.- "Maybe, it's just the free meal your getting," Slyly she cocked her head, a teasing twinkle in her eyes, then looking back to what she had not eaten she continued, "Or the way the stars are aligned." The stars had not shown their faces, but eventually they might. Of coarse it was all in good fun. Grabbing at what was left before her, she chewed on it till it was tiny pieces. Listening thoughtfully, but concentrating on the action, till it was finished. A bit left, she went for another portion soon filling her stomach. A tiny yawn managed to escape, and she licked her lips with open jaws. Then rubbing her nose against her forelegs wondering why Borden looked for eevs droppers. Stopping what she was doing, she stared at him with what could pass as concern, but was mostly her trying to understand his uncertainty. Hmmm. A new wolf with Alexander. She had to take her mind back to the mountain, and then she knew exactly what he was asking. "I have noticed a new,white female. But no, I do not know who she is sadly." She could easily recall the picture of the stranger from a distance. She was unhappy to state she did not know her, because truefully she was on a long list of many others. "But then again, I hardly know Alexander either." Sight cast down to her paws, and she set her head atop them, looking into the white glimmer. The moon had come out among the clouds, and it made the powder sparkle like glitter where it broke though the trees. The sun was not down, but starting to hide behind the mountain so the east had all it's light. A regular sigh slipped from her rib cage. She wanted to be hard on herself, as she had not made a grand effort to know anyone. Even though she had wanted to, and still bugged her she had not. For awhile the idea of it all didn't seem like a good one, hidden inside her was a fear of not being welcomed. Logic was if she never signaficantly interacted with them, they would not know her, and therefore had no reason to wish her ill. Logicly. Fear was something she didn't like to hide from, or really could sad to say. The silver female hid behind it, letting it be the worthless lies to make her feel in the right. She knew better, and did not believe them for a minute. She should seek out her pack members and accept the fact they could hate or like her. Take her as her. lost your balance on a tight rope. lost your mind trying to get it back.