Umbra Copse where were you while we were getting high [m]

@Kino  trying to be real vague and like not mention anything from the OTB thread...
This would be basically week 3 of her pregnancy: mood swings, but not necessarily any noticeable belly.
mature for mentions/emotions regarding death

The scent was stale but unmistakable—like the  increasingly volatile moods, vomiting, and appetite that could not be ignored—wrapped around the shivering trees like fine spider's silk. She glanced next to her at Alastor, who had been her shadow even more so than usual these last few weeks. Laurel had been here, was all her look said or had to say. Maybe it had been a week, or more, but the boy had been here in Quaking Vale.

They had traveled back here on a whim, not really expecting to find any clues, though they admitted they had not given the territory a good hard look. There might be some rock, some snapped twig, something to indicate what direction the Vale wolves had departed in. So far there had been nothing like that, just Laurel—Laurel everywhere. Sahalie was sure they would not have missed his markings the first time around. He had not been here before, but he was also not here now. She was chewing on her lips, thinking about how she would even begin to explain to the boy what had happened and what their plans were, to box him on the ears and ask what his plans were. To apologize?

It was all too complicated.

But he wasn't here.

And as she approached the central clearing, the place they had all once laid their heads to rest under the open sky, she saw what Laurel saw. Her heart hitched on her ribs. Wordlessly, mouth open, her head turned towards her companion and then she charged forward, sliding to a stop on her stomach at the opening to the fallen, hollowed tree. Her dear friend was laying there, in a sorry state, thawing and rancid and lifeless. There were marks in the soft, muddy ground where he had been dragged here to be laid to rest. Laurel had done this. Her breathing was shallow and quick. He was dead, her advisor, her confidant, her friend. There was no sign of a struggle. He had been dead for a long time. All winter maybe.

The Vale wolves must have left quite awhile ago, to not even notice. Maybe.

"Oh, Alastor," she couldn't even think of what to say. Sahalie turned and buried her face in his fur. None of this was what she had wanted. Larkspur was old, and he was sick, but he had always endured. The man was a lot stronger than he looked. She couldn't even tell him, now, that she would finally give him the grandchildren he'd asked her for. He was gone.

(This post was last modified: Apr 01, 2018, 09:14 PM by Sahalie. Edit Reason: didn't meant to make this an RE thread )

If I ever leave I could learn to miss you

When Sahalie’s scent had changed he’d been filled with a mixture of nervousness and complete joy. Nervousness at being a father, about messing it up, but joy about everything that would come with it. Hal’s mood swings hadn’t changed much from her heat, though her appetite had increased noticeably and he found himself hunting far more frequently. Luckily most animals were starting to come out of hibernation, which meant prey was becoming more available to them. But, sometimes it seemed that the food would escape her just as quickly as it entered which worried him. He didn’t have much experience with the actual process of pregnancy. Sure he’d been around when Spieden and Aponi had been pregnant, but it had only been in brief instances to check up on them like a good packmate then he was off. All he got was some snippy comments and to see their bellies grow bigger. This was all new to him and he had to hope that it was all normal.

As they ventured through the Vale for a second time the scent of the one they were looking for was everywhere, though very stale. It was old, very old in fact, and his eyes flickered over to meet with his sunspot’s before they moved on. It sucked to know they had missed him, that he had been in the same area as they had been not too long before. It seemed like fate did not want them to be together.

As they headed to the central clearing, something started to smell rotten and his nose crinkled. He thought, perhaps, Laurel had caught some prey and left a piece of it to rot. That was, until he spotted a glimmer of white fur in the fallen log tied inexplicably to Larkspur. They both stopped and he looked to Hal, his chest tight. He made a step to do the same thing he had done to Ari when they had come upon their mother’s body. Shield her from the horror of the view, of the pain, but the dark girl was gone in an instant and he was hot on her heels.

He stared at the body of the man, coming close to the verge of unrecognizable. He was rotting, Alastor realized. His body decaying. It had been no prey animal left to the birds he had scented, but the body of his friend and advisor. He felt a tightness in his throat he hadn’t expected. For the longest time he had thought that if he’d found the man dead he wouldn’t have cared. He’d have shrugged and moved on, but...that didn’t seem to be the case. He felt a deep sorrow settling into the pit of his stomach at the loss, because he found he had actually come to like the man in their own sort of way. Their relationship wasn’t great, not even good really, but they had settled into something that was unexplainable.

Sahalie buried her face in his fur and he bent his head to cocoon her in a wolfish hug, trying his best to give her comfort. His topaz gaze rested on the body, sadness softening his expression. “It doesn’t look like he died in pain. Probably in his sleep, snoring like a grizzly bear,” he said, hoping that she might find solace in that observation. And it was true. Even through the rot and the movement of the body he could truly picture their deceased friend sleeping beneath the stars, slipping into oblivion with a final last roaring snore before silence overtook him. At least, that’s what he wanted to believe.

With sentimental boy as my nom de plume

tell me that you'll open your eyes
left it vague what kino would have done while she was asleep?

Whatever Alastor said was probably true but she couldn't hear it over the din of her own thoughts. One singular plea reverberated off of every corner of her skull, as she screwed her eyes shut and sank back to the ground: please just wake up. With one paw she reached out and touched the decaying remains, whining loudly for a time before falling silent. And she was silent for many hours, wracking her brain to try and remember what his face looked like, what his voice sounded like, the color of his eyes that were now sunken in. The fading of memories had happened with Anneliese. All the details just slipped away gently, without her even noticing, until one day she woke up with the painful realization that nothing but the framework of her recollections were there: a white wolf who told her she was a princess, who treated her hurt paw and made her stop crying. But was she kind? Had she smiled? What color were her eyes? Sahalie thought they might have been unusual, but she couldn't really say.

She just wanted to tell him. Just to talk to him again.

- - -

At some point she must have fallen asleep. It was twilight now, and the air was cooling off. She blinked a few times, sighing. Nothing had changed, but she woke up with her resolve beginning to settle and an idea beginning to form in her mind. She couldn't share the good news with Larkspur, but there was a desperate need in her to share it with her father. After everything that had happened, all the wrongs that had been laid to rest, and the emotions that had passed there was no anger left in side of her. She just missed him like she had as a child. She wanted to be able to show her children to him.

Unbidden, she remembered that Larkspur and her father had not been that far off in age, though she had never really known how old either of them were. Maybe her father had mentioned it once, when he had gone off on a tangent—it was all coming back to her—asking her to take care of Treyah and Reiko if something ever happened. Not until this moment has Sahalie ever considered how real that request was, how something could really happen. If Larkspur could... just die like this, alone and quietly, what if her father... She just always though, no matter what, that he still had forever. That he would be in her life forever no matter how far away he was or how mad at him she was.

What if something had already happened.

"Alastor? Al? Are you there?" Her head whipped frantically around in the fading light. "We need to go see my father. We need to see him right now. We have to tell him." She felt sick and feverish. Maybe it was the corpse.

If I ever leave I could learn to miss you

He watched quietly as she unfurled herself from him, reaching out with her paw to touch his decaying body. The silver man grimaced at the keening whine that escaped her jaws, auds lowering. He never imagined that this would be the way that they would meet again when he had left the Vale in the paws of the pale man. If he had known...he didn’t know what he might have done honestly. Stayed. He hoped he would have stayed. Kino sat quietly in place, keeping vigil as his mate mourned their loss.

---

Eventually Sahalie had fallen asleep and he’d laid by her side, even resting a bit himself. The three of them, resting side by side as they had done so many times. He knew it was just them, but in a sense he felt like it was the man really there with them. After a while he’d gotten up to stretch his legs, pressing his nose affectionately to Hal’s sleeping temple before meandering a short ways away to relieve himself.

He sat, gaze looking up at the sky as the light began to die painting the world in it’s brilliant hues. He thought back on the last time he’d seen the body of someone he cared about. His mother. He remembered her looking so peaceful, like she really was sleeping. He had never gotten the chance to rest with her one final night before she was buried. Never really gotten the chance to say goodbye. The anger and betrayal he’d felt had long since faded with his rekindling of a relationship between he and his brother, but there was still the sense of loss. The death of Larkspur dredged up those feelings of melancholy and he closed his bright eyes, taking in a deep breath and exhaling slowly.

Hal’s panicked voice called into the air and instantly he was on his feet, at her side in less than a minute. He looked around, ensuring that no thing or no one was there causing her panic. Once that was settled he looked at her, eyes wild and demeanor frantic. His brows creased with worry. “Hey, hey it’s okay. I’m here. What’s going on? What’re you thinking?” He asked, his voice gentle. This had not been the first time an event like this had happened, and each time he would ask the same thing of her. To tell him what was going on in that beautiful mind of hers. Ask her to spill the words that were wrapped up in her brain in an attempt to alleviate her anxiety.

With sentimental boy as my nom de plume

Shallow water has trapped several fish in a small pond. Hunt Opportunity

"Larkspur always wanted grandchildren... from me." She whined as her muzzle prodded and worried at the underside of his chin. It was hard not to laugh softly—even if it felt inappropriate—thinking back to their talk about puppies and Alastor flirting with and subsequently knocking up some other girl. And a year later, here they were: pregnant in front of her dead friend. It was morbidly comical. Ironic, she guessed, was the term for it. Calmly, she began again, "And I just. I keep thinking about my real dad, this is going to be his grandchild. He should see it. And...and..." It was so hard to stay calm

A another whine slipped out of her and the words became faster, "He's old Al, he's old like Larkspur was old. I'm just... I'm just so worried that something will have happened to him and I won't get to tell him that I'll be a mother." All her energy was being put into slowing down her ragged breathing. "It's like so much is disappearing from my life and I don't know where its gone. Laurel is gone, Larkspur is gone, our pack is gone..." Triell would just be another item tacked on to a very long laundry list of work they needed to do. All this while her body was ripening and growing, and pretty soon she would swell up like a balloon and then—her eyes bulged—how would she get over the mountain?

Immediately she was on her paws. "We need...we need to leave now."

If I ever leave I could learn to miss you

Hal worried and prodded at his chin and he let her, occasionally pressing a reassuring kiss to her head or ear. He almost chuckled at Larkspur wanting grandchildren from her. It was definitely something that he would say, in all his snark and wit. Then she was talking about Triell, a wolf he’d actually almost managed to forget about even if that made him a bad wolf. She began sounding more erratic, her words whipping out from her jaws talking about how he was old and that she was worried something might have happened to him.

The silver man couldn’t say that her worry wasn’t warranted, after all her father was indeed in his later years. Kino himself knew all too well how quickly a parent could slip from someone’s grasp. He listened to her speak, brows creased in concern then suddenly she was on her paws insisting that they needed to leave. Right then. He stood up, coraling her to keep her from bolting. It was obvious that she wasn’t in her right mind. Seeing Larkspur had been a lot for her, and while her worry was warranted it didn’t mean that they needed to start their trek through the night. Traveling at night was much too dangerous, especially due to her pregnancy.

“I agree, we’ll go see your dad,” he started, leveling his head with hers in an attempt to calm her. “But we can’t leave right now. It’s dark and not safe. Can’t have something going bump in the night on you, think of the pups. We’ll leave in the morning, when you’ve slept some more. That sound good?” he asked.

With sentimental boy as my nom de plume

manic sahalie

Suddenly he loomed like a mountain in front of her. The girl's eyes narrowed. "If someone told you your mother was alive right now," maybe this was a bit cruel but she could not stop herself, "Would you let anything stop you from telling her. Or being with her. Even me?" Time was running out for her dad. She was, all of the sudden, convinced that he could be so old that even one day might make all the difference. "I just don't want to lose this chance. I don't want to know that I could tell him but I waited too long. I don't want it to be too late."

"How am I even supposed to sleep like this?" Despite all her arguing, she was listening to him anyway. What choice did she have? Alastor was nearly double her height and, while Sahalie did have quite a bit of weight on her, Alastor's bulk was comprised mainly of muscle. Inside of her was fragile life. In reality, Alastor would never lay a paw or tooth on her that would put her in danger, but she was not sure he wasn't above lifting her by the scruff and dragging her back here anyway. It would be her fault if she struggled and hurt herself. She was a sitting duck. "With all this." Rotting carcass behind her, rotting time ahead of her.

She sighed.

"We can at least plan, can't we?" Behind her eyes her mind whirred with all of things that needed to be done. "Because probably pretty soon I'll be an over-infalted bullfrog that's gotta get over that mountain..." She fell silent for a minute, thinking of the best way over. "Or maybe through it..." She chuckled wryly, muttering, "Haven't visited Archainn Tunnels in awhile."

"Oh!" She lit up suddenly, straightening, "We could see Kyna on the way. She was trying to found a pack on the mountains last year. She was pregnant when I saw her, so they must have settled down somewhere shortly after I saw her. The pack's gotta be over there. She'll want to see me." What a strange, off-tune echo of her former self she was: all the energy but none of the heart.

If I ever leave I could learn to miss you

Perhaps Kino should have expected her to make a comment about his mother, after all that seemed to be her go to insult or subject to bring up when they were in an argument. But it didn’t make it hurt any less. He took a step back and sat down, a deep breath filling his barreled silver chest and exiting through his nose.

He could see her point. There had been a time that the man had thought there’d be anything in the world he would do to bring his mother back. But in the time since then he had accepted her death. Accepted the fact that there was nothing he or anyone else did that had caused it. There were times he wished he’d spent a little more time with her that day, or the many days before that. That he hadn’t taken her as for granted, but he had also come to terms with the fact that there was nothing he could do to change that. But he couldn’t say that to Hal, who was in the thick of it all. Couldn’t say that if Triell was or wasn’t alive when they got there, that it wasn’t their fault. That fate was a fickle being that took what it wanted when it wanted without giving a damn about the consequences.

When she mentioned that she wouldn’t be able to sleep around Larkspur’s body he agreed. He also wouldn’t be able to. He thought, perhaps, they could bury him then go and curl up in the divets in the ground that the pack had used. But she sighed and he knew she had more to say, so he kept his trap shut and the tucked the suggestion in the back of his mind to bring up when she was done.

She asked if they could plan, stating that soon she would be an ‘over inflated bullfrog’ and he snorted out a laugh. Perhaps he would just have to roll over over the mountain. The thought itself made him clench his jaw to keep from laughing again. She suddenly straightened and his auds shifted forward into attention, oceanic gaze looking at her curiously. He mentioned Kyna, that she had been trying to settle a pack and that she was pregnant at the time. When they heck was his mate going to tell him that? He pictured the tall red-head that they had hung around with so often when they had been in the Bend. Yeah, maybe it would be a good idea to go visit.

”Yeah, let’s go visit Kyna on the way. That’d be a good idea, we can leave as soon as you like tomorrow or anytime after that. See how well you can keep up with these long legs,” he said cheekily, nudging her foreleg in amusement. “I have no plans of keeping you from seeing your dad, I hope you know that. Family’s important and he’d definitely want to know that he’s having some grandkids,” he told her in earnest. “I just hope he doesn’t try to maim me when he finds out,” he mumbled.

“Would you want to...bury him?” he asked, gaze shifting toward their deceased friend. He didn’t want him to sit out for the buzzards, to be picked at by any other scavengers. In his mind it was also a matter of respect. They had buried his mother for the same reasons.

With sentimental boy as my nom de plume

@Kino feel free to fade/archive with your post

Sahalie didn't know why she was trying to goad him like he was some bear that wandered into her territory. She wasn't testing him to see if he would get mad at her—for some stupid reason she wanted him to be mad at her. It would have felt like old times, to have some stupid argument about something neither of them could fix. Anything to make herself feel like a little girl again where they would bicker like birds in spring time and Larkspur would sit in the background chewing mercilessly on a splintered stick.

But now they were Grown Ups, so Alastor just took a deep breath and swallowed all his frustration. She could see him rationalizing her behavior in his eyes: she was just upset, she was tired, she had a point. But what about family, what about doing everything in his power, what about being unstoppable. Was this just the stuff of childhood?

Suddenly she was very tired.

From his reaction she realized that she had never mentioned any of this to him. Whoops. So much had happened, and there was no way of changing it. Didn't make a ton of difference anyway. Kyna and Kino had gotten along well but they were never close. Sahalie had been the glue holding them together, despite the fact that they two of them had so much in common. In a different world they might have ended up together. She shook her head: what an odd thought. No stranger than imagining her dad hurting Alastor. Whatever for? But Sahalie was just a girl and didn't know about dad-feelings or that protective, parental drive. She shrugged.

"No, I want to leave him here." This was his log. This was where he slept every night. "This is where Laurel brought him, and this was where he would want to be." She could not bare to imagine her friend at the bottom of a hole. Either the worms would get him or the hawks would, but at least out here he could be under the open sky and a part of a grander world. "It's his log." For several, long moments she stared down at the man before turning and walking away. There would be some nice piece of earth nearby where she couldn't smell his body.