Clearwater Tarn My only grievance is a broken dream

@Piety
I am assuming at this point Cheedo told Pi about their encounter.

Lenae felt a little better, physically at least. The nausea had faded somewhat-for now- which meant it was easier for the little Selwyn to go about her daily routine. Being in a pack again, rather than a loose band, gave Lenae a sense of purpose and belonging. At first she had been a little worried that no one was happy, after all things had been rather tense but it seemed as though things had levelled out. Become flat and steady like the land they had claimed as their own. Lenae trotted along the shoreline her tail swishing freely as she bounced along, leaving small paw prints in her wake. It was pretty here, sheltered by the shadows of the mountains in the distance, but most importantly it wasn't too familiar.

Perhaps this would be the right place to raise her litter- if they wanted anything to do with her, that is.

A frown tugged at her lips as she slowed to a walk. Would they hate her? What if no matter how hard she tried they turned into bad seeds, twisted little beings that wanted nothing more than to harm others? Had the Mother's of those murderers thought the same thing, all those years ago? Her stomach rumbled and she flinched, her ears flicking back against her skull. Oh yes, that was right, she he was hungry, such a common occurrence these days. No matter how much she ate it just wasn't enough, her stomach rumbled and rumbled, even when she was curled up in the den at night.

She sighed and shook her head. Her Mother hadn't told her about this either, the insatiable hunger, the desire to gobble up everything and anything in sight. There was a cache nearby, if she remembered correctly, maybe if she had a rabbit it would sate her appetite, for now. Lenae was on the move again, moving away from the shore this time but her tail remained where it was supposed to be, curled between her legs.

The open area of the Tarn's shore allowed her to spot the Selwyn with ease. She picked up her pace as noticed the other was moving away from the shore. A lighthearted woof escaped her with hopes she would not startle Lenae. Piety hadn't spent too much time with her lately and it was overdue they had some one-on-one time. Especially with the way things had seemed so stiff at the founding. The Santoro simply wanted everyone to be comfortable and close - was that too much to ask for?

"Lenae." She called out as she slid up next to the smaller female. Piety's tail was high but it waved about with a friendly eagerness. "Mind if I join you?" The leader asked as if she hadn't already invaded the Selwyn's space. She was terribly afraid of being shooed off though. The two of them seemed rather close as far as the dove could tell.

# C W T

Piety was...special, important to Lenae. It was true that she held feelings for the dove but...it wasn't important to her whether they were reciprocated or not. She wasn't jealous nor was she upset that she had taken Lorcan as her mate. After all, it was obvious they had history and he did seem to make her very happy. That was all she wanted really, if Piety was happy then Lenae could cope .

She would never turn Piety away, the mere idea of doing so seemed strange and unnatural to the little Selwyn. Besides, this land belonged to her, in a sense the same could be said of Lenae. She was Piety's subordinate, of which she could do as she pleased. Lenae trusted the dove with her life-and in extension, the life of her unborn litter- so it wasn't as if she would ever decline the offer of her company. Piety was always welcome, always a sight for her sore eyes.

"No...yes? I mean, of course you can join me. I was just...I was going to get some food from the cache."Her cheeks flushed hot and she stared down at her paws, thoroughly ashamed. She pushed her paw deeper into the snow, as if she were debating diving headfirst into it, all to hide her shame. "I'm so hungry all the time. I don't like it, doesn't seem fair on everyone else."

She chuckled softly at the answer that came from the Selwyn. The dove moved to nudge gently under Lenae's head. Well not everyone here is eating for more than one so I think we get a pass. A smile tugged at her scarred features. If Lenae was hungry then Piety hoped she ate to her heart's content. The pack had willing and working bodies to fill the stomachs of the expecting mothers. If they didn't then things would have been...different. Lucky for them that wasn't the case.

Come, let's find you something fresh and filling. Piety motioned with her head before slowly beginning to walk towards the closest cache. The earth was still cold enough to protect most kills they stored. Of course, there was the possibility of things being frozen solid but perhaps if they found something more recently stored they wouldn't run that risk.

Her brown gaze glanced to look at Lenae, silently inspecting her form. How are you feeling so far?

# C W T

Piety had a point, but it all seemed so unfair. If she wasn't so worried that Cheedo would yell at her again she would have maybe thought about eating a little less, but now that Piety told her it was okay, that it was only natural....Well, Lenae frowned, her brows drawing down as her lips tipped down at the corners. Whilst she wanted what was best for the little lives growing inside of her it was hard to ignore the unrelenting guilt that hammered away at her everyday. At the very least no one was mad, thought her a greedy glutton, she wasn't sure how she would have coped with that.

Dipping her head in agreement, Lenae trailed after her alpha. She supposed Piety was well familiar with being pregnant, after all this wasn't her first litter. Perhaps that was why she was so understanding...or maybe it was a Piety thing, she just couldn't help being so kind.

"I feel...sick a lot of the time."She admitted, as she sped up a little to walk by her side. Close, but not too close, lest Lorcan took offence. "And tired, so drained. No one told me it would be like this, when my...Mother spoke of it she made it sound so nice, like it was good."

Perhaps it was for others, maybe Lenae didn't deserve such joy.

"I'm not sure if I'm doing this right. It doesn't feel natural...I'm not-what if I ruin them?"She asked, her voice barely a whisper.