Lost Lake you broke me first

forward dated to 03.01.21 for @Lila
late evening | snow | 12.2°F, -11°C 
Trix let us know they were no longer able to commit to RoW right now, so Neha will be inactive as of 3/1

Having returned from another scouting trip through the Falls and Wildwood, the Vuesain heir found his way back to the hidden cove to seek out his littermate. While on his trip he had discovered someone and he was sure his sister would of liked to be made aware of what he found. However, the light agouti woman was nowhere to be found within their shared den or anywhere within the Cove. His mind refused to think of the worst as that wasn't Neha. The vow between them to never leave one another was so sacred to the dark agouti male. The guilt and regret if he ever broke his word to her would bury him alive. So he refused to think that she would ever think of doing that to him.

Wandering around for days, searching for a fresh scent anywhere within the conifers or mountain range, Aleister didn't stop to eat or even rest. He was determined to find her hidden upon an outcrop or along the lakeshore, taking some time for herself or something that kept her here with him. Neha could be out joining another group for all he cared, but it meant she was still within the Lore with him. But as the nights blurred together with no sight of his sibling only faded traces of her, the realization and pain began to bury him. The emotions he used to run from began to haunt him again. The guilt. The regret. And now the anger returned.

Aleister stared absent-mindedly at his mother's burial sight upon a ledge that overlooked the Lake. Drained, the Vuesain sat upon his haunches for the first time in days as he stared at the rock that marked the Vuesain matriarch's resting place. He had no idea why his sister was gone and why she did not say a word to him before. The emotions that boiled within him threatened to overcome him entirely, though anyone could easily see how hurt the Vuesain male was. His normally tranquil façade was no longer there, instead he was on the verge of a breakdown. Seeking the comfort of his mother, Aleister hoped visiting her would provide him with something other than anger.

(This post was last modified: Feb 26, 2021, 10:28 PM by Aleister.)

I think there's a flaw in my code

When the sun began its descent she did not like to be far from the lake. Why she was getting the hang of trekking the mountain, in the dark she didn't want to take chances. Since it was fairly chilly today, shelter sounded awfully nice. Especially right now as she was covered in a blanket of new snow. She didn't make a move to shake it off, she came across Aleister's fresh path. They'd only saw less of Neha, and she had a feeling he had been out looking for her again to no avail. With a sigh, she began to follow his his trail, up, winding backward from the lake. She'd never been here before, and wondered if this was a chosen spot. If she should seek him out. She didn't want to bother him, but also didn't think it was a good idea he was alone.

He was not far. The spot overlooked the lake, but he did not look like he was enjoying the peaceful scenery. Where he was sitting she noticed a rock that seemed there for a reason. Like him. "Is this seat taken?" There was no smile to greet him, just a gentle look as she went to sit down beside him. She could relate to a sibling gone, but honestly didn't know how he was doing or what he was feeling. Him and Neha had time together, and plans. A closeness she'd never had. She could only imagine it made it much worse. Had she left him? Or had something happened to her? "No signs?"

You discover a half-eaten deer carcass. +5 Health

He was numb by now from the brisk weather, a blanket of snow coating his dark agouti back as he stared aimlessly ahead. Was he supposed to go after her? Keep his vow to her that he would never abandon her side or was he supposed to recreate their birth pack without her? The indecision of what he should do crowded his mind, making him unaware when she joined him along the ridge until her voice spoke out to him. A silent shake of his head was all he could muster before he began to feel the warmth of her radiate across him as she sat down beside him.

Silence fell upon them for only a moment before she asked if there were any signs of his sister. "No," he answered hoarsely. Having howled and yelled for Neha hours upon hours, his voice was rough and needed to be refreshed by the Lake below. "I just don't understand," he muttered softly, his mismatched gaze frozen upon the boulder. As he stared, Aleister realized his mother deserved more than just a boulder marking her resting place. Namid deserved so much more than a dull grey mountain rock, she deserved a flower field and towering conifers that touched the stars above to show special she was. Stepping forward, he swept a paw across the plain boulder dusting the fallen snow off the face. Slowly, he returned to where he had sat, his gaze still unwavering upon the now uncovered stone.

She had been his best friend, the one he could rely on for anything and fiercely protected against everything. When he found her at the brink of despair and death upon Skeletal Hill, he had vowed to never leave her alone ever again. Aleister had kept his vow for exactly 3 years. But now, she was the one that walked away, leaving him alone as the last Vuesain within the Lore. The dark agouti male could not find any signs of distress, only the careful and steady steps that led away from the Lake and the Lore altogether. Leaving without a word, a goodbye or reason.

"Why would she just leave?" He began, mismatched eyes finally moving away from the stone to meet a pair pale blue ones as his gaze swirled with emotion. "We were almost ready. Maybe a week and we could of started making everything official. But then she just leaves?" His voice began to raise as the anger that simmered within him began to boil while under the heat from the pain within his chest. This wasn't just his idea, but hers. Neha was the one that wanted to go home and see how everyone was fairing. Unbeknownst to them both that their birthplace had been abandoned entirely. Aleister felt the pull to return, but he had been comfortable how they were together just the two of them. "How could she just leave me?"

 

I think there's a flaw in my code

She thought as much, and held the silence. Evidently, he wasn't hiding his pain from her and it made it all a more delicate matter. As he dusted off the stone she watched, with an unwavering gaze. She felt sure it was a marker for his parents. She could see why he'd come here. If only they could speak with him.

She took in a long, quiet breath, feeling rather inadequate. If he didn't know she certainly didn't. However, the Aquila knew a thing or two about leaving. Walking away itself was easy. The feelings you carried could make it difficult, but not impossible. She'd like to believe Neha had struggled with the decision. But, leaving without reason and goodbye? No, she didn't have any idea why she'd do that to him. It didn't make sense to her either, and she couldn't right the wrong. "I'd guess a change in heart, and she didn't have the heart to tell you." It was rather cowardly, but she didn't have a place to judge. It was so strange by his description of their relationship for her to do things this way.

How could she just leave me? Briefly, her ears flattened and she deliberated. What would she leave Aleister behind for? Someone who could fill the same hole? A promise of an even brighter future? She frowned, her brows furrowed. "I don't know, but she's chosen a different path regardless. You might never know." You're gonna have to learn to live with it, or let it kill you slowly.

He appreciated the silence for once. Usually when he was with Lila, he liked to talk and hold memorable conversations with her. Today, the Vuesain did not feel particularly talkative and it showed. Moments were filed with silence as Aleister mulled over the thought of his sister leaving the Lore once again, though this time without him by her side.

The breath she took in, brought him out of the distant trace he had been in as he stared unwavering at his mother’s gravestone. Her voice moved his ears slightly as she guessed a possible reason for his sister’s absence. If that was the reason for her to leave without telling him, the last three years were a lie. The dark agouti male dutifully and loyally kept glued to her side after vowing to never leave her alone. The same was promised by her. ”We promised to never leave each other.” He muttered softly, his gaze still upon the gravestone in front of them. He wondered if his mother would of had anything to say to him if she could. Would she advise him to follow after her? Or keep his promise to everyone here and led on without her?

His mismatched gaze moved to meet the deep pale blue pools once more, hoping to find some answers or even just the slightest comfort from them. ”I don’t think she’s ever coming back.” Right then was when he finally decided. ”Not now, that I’m not leaving.” Perhaps, she expected him to silently follow after her and meet up with her. But, he just couldn’t get himself to leave the Lake again. Something was keeping him rooted here this time, almost as if his mother had ahold of his legs, not allowing him to flee like he used to. Part of him was thankful for whatever it was grounding him.

 

I think there's a flaw in my code

”We promised to never leave each other.” That was pretty, god damn awful. Like a punch to the gut. He'd already had enough reason to feel like shit, but that? It was a real kicker. Knowing how conflicted he'd been before, she now had no kind thoughts for the woman. This was the last thing Aleister needed. "She broke that promise, not you," she quietly spoke, taking care of her tone. Maybe, she didn't need to say it, but she felt like he needed to hear that from someone else. It was easy to get caught up in the blame game unfortunately. Her choice wasn't his fault, but this was one of the reasons she hated making promises. They were worthless things weren't they?

Her eyes didn't waver from his, she could see he was trying to hold onto something. Why she didn't think she was the best thing, she saw it as one, small thing she could do for him. She didn't like the pain she saw in his gaze, especially since she'd known how worried he'd been even with Neha here. Good riddance. With a goodbye like that, she also didn't think Neha would show face again. She wouldn't be welcomed that was for certain by her.

There was a faint smile. "I'm glad to hear you're not leaving. You're needed here you know." He'd come back for good reason, and he shouldn't live the rest of his life like a shadow to his sister. She was proud he'd made his own choice for himself. "I wanted to tell you I'm not planning on it either." Not exactly a promise, but a truth that she wasn't going to leave without a thought. She wanted to be apart of this new pack, be there for him, and the rest. That it would take something great to pull her from this choice.

Her soft words almost pulled his gaze away from the gravestone. It was as if Lila had an inkling of the guilt that riddled the dark agouti Vuesain. Having lived with it for most of his life, Aleister was used to the pain like he was getting punch in the stomach over and over. She was right on the feeling and the fact that it was his littermate that broke that promise the two of them made to one another. Aleister should not be to blame for a decision she made by herself and her alone. Without his counsel, leaving him to question himself and their shared goals, she left without any consideration for the hurt she would cause.

His words were met with a faint smile as Lila was happy to hear he decided not to follow after his littermate. Aleister was needed here with the Eastfall family depending on his future leadership. They were the main reasons why he didn’t immediately track Neha down. He could not picture himself leaving them behind. Her next words were completely unexpected, making his mismatched gaze look to her quickly. “Really? You want to join us?” His words didn’t hid the surprise that he held nor the happiness of the thought of Lila staying within the Cove.

 

I think there's a flaw in my code

She knew he had heard her, despite his silent stillness. She was fine with that. It meant he didn't feel the need to disagree and what else could be said? She felt he'd already cussed her out, if he was the cussing kind. She didn't take him for that kinda guy, but if anyone had a good reason to do so it would be him. The Aquila was again struck by what she did know about him, and all that she did not. No longer strangers, but what? Friends?

She had his attention, and her smile grew. There was the Aleister she knew, and his happiness helped ease some of her fear about this new chapter. "Yes. I didn't want to at first because I wasn't sure if I even wanted to say in the Lore. Like you, now that I'm here I do. Having met you all, staying here, I don't see any good reason to go. It's just gonna be different, being a mountain wolf." But, she was positive she was surrounded by a group that would help her adjust along the way.

For the moment, Aleister’s hurt of his sister leaving him had subsided, rooting itself in the back corner of his head, while the happiness of Lila staying replaced it for the time being. He truly was enjoying her company and was happy to see she decided to call the Cove home. The dark agouti man was sure Chan would be happy to know his old friend was choosing to stay with them. That left him to wonder if he was the first to know.

“I think we can teach you a few tricks,” he answered with a grin, his solemn facade put away for the moment. When he thought everything was starting to fall apart, it seemed fate at a way of pulling it back together. Lila was choosing to stay, putting them somewhat back on track to claim the cove once more. Life was going to be different now that he was not alongside his sibling, but at least now he was surrounded by those that choose to stay. I’m really happy you decided to stay,” he said softly as his mismatched gaze looked over to her pale blue eyes. This time his gaze was filled with happiness instead of crippling sadness.