Sanguine Cove Since you went away the days grow short

Backdated to 8/7, for @Oksana , other SC / present family of Al welcome too. Discussing creating a memorial, that thread will follow a day or two after?
@Leo , Kat, pups etc.

Stella had chewed on her thoughts over and over in the days since her father's passing. She still hated to think of it like that, but what choice was there? Remembering Moon's advice about keeping her loved ones with her, she sought support in the embrace of nature, her home, around her, as well as her family and loved ones.

And yet. The wind, the sunrise, these things did not feel solid enough to her. The yearling girl felt adrift, and she needed something more solid to anchor herself and her memories too. She needed to know Pa would be watching over them, always. Perhaps, it could be of help to others, too. And so, a plan to create a lasting memorial was loosely formed. But first, she ought to discuss her idea.

Making her way toward the solid stone-clad heart of the territory, she gave a short bark, hoping that the Crow might answer.

(This post was last modified: Sep 21, 2022, 03:48 AM by Stella.)

Oksana had taken a few moments to herself after she'd done her rounds that morning. Now that her children were older she felt they didn't need her constant supervision anymore she could take these moments. It had become her chance to get away from everything and rest or think about the times she'd spent with Aleister. Even though months had past since he'd left them she still missed him so much. In some ways she thought she was doing better but in others not so much.

The short bark had her attention though she almost hadn't heard it. The crow hadn't realized she'd fallen asleep but she was awake and on her feet in moments. She'd recognized the voice belonging to her stepdaughter. There wasn't anyway she'd keep her waiting if the girl needed to talk. Quickly she made her way to meet Stella.

Soon enough she found her amd offered her a smile as she approached. "What is it Stella are you okay?" She asked worried that something might be wrong. She'd tried to make it clear that she cared about the Vuesain yearlings even though their father wasn't with them any longer.

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"Thanks for coming to talk with me, Oksana," Stella moved to sit by her side. At one time she had been reluctant, for reasons she knew were childish, to embrace the Baranski woman as a mother figure. Time and shared experience had brought her around.

"I'm... okay," she responded with a slight hesitation, meeting the crow's gaze, but it was true. It made her feel a bit guilty, but knew her Pa would have wanted them all to be okay, and to not feel guilty about it.

"I was thinkin' about doing something for Pa, and the others that've been lost before." Part of her hesitation to accept Okasana as a mother figure was because it felt like the last step of giving up on Kip for good. It was pretty dumb, honestly. But she'd found something to help her deal with that loss, and it had helped to open her eyes to that. She hoped that Oksana could help her share her idea with the pack now.

The Cove had been founded on the memories of before, she knew that much. But those memories should be their strength, not their burden. A foundation for the hopes of a bright future. "To help make sure that their memories are always here, lookin' over us," she voiced the thoughts that had been on her heart, her tone questioning. She had thought long and hard about this, talked it over a bit already, but she wanted to make sure that their leader, her stepmother, had the final say.

"Of course Stella. I'm always here if you need to talk," she truly hoped the girl knew that. She hoped all of the Vuesain children knew that. Though she knew she wasn't their mother Oksana had committed herself to them just as she had their father whether they knew it or not. It wasn't ever her desire to replace their mother but it was her hope that they could all be a family.

She offered the girl a sad smile. "We have to take it ine day at a time. Whatever your feeling is okay," she said gently. Oksana had learned that some days would be okay and some would not. For a long time they wpukd live day to day until one day it didn't hurt so much. That they could get through each day without thinking of what they had lost and be able to smile at the memories.

Oksana's curiosity was piqued as Stella explained why she'd called for the crow. At first she was a little surprised at the idea. The crow liked the idea very much and thought that it was something the cove needed. "I think it's a great idea Stella. I know I haven't been here as long as you but from what I understand the cove has lost many great wolves. They should be remembered along with your father and I think this is an idea he would have liked." There wasn't any doubt in her mind that having some kind of memorial was something Aleister would have liked.

"Since this is your idea I think that you should have the honor of creating it," Oksana decided. To her it only seemed fair that Stella get the credit but she also felt that being in charge of it could help her step daughters healing. "However, I don't want you to think you have to do it all on your own. I will help you in anyway way I can. Just let me know what that way might be."

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"Thanks," she let out the sigh with a weight she'd been holding back a bit. It was a relief that Oksana understood. "I'm here if you need anything too, okay?" she didn't want to only rely on the others around her, she wanted to help support them.

The bittersweet smile was shared between them, everything still felt fragile. But Oksana's curiosity brought a small spark of accomplishment, that she thought the idea was worthwhile and that Stella should go ahead with it. Her head raised and ears raised from where they'd laid back.

Then she let out a soft whine. The idea that Oksana had not been here very long was strange to Stella, the months since her return had been so eventful that they felt drawn out, and the crow had truly become a part of the cove. And, Stella just felt like a girl grappling with things bigger than herself. She smiled back at the shadowy woman, glad to have the guidance of her elders in times like this.

"Maybe... come and see it when its time, if you can," she had in mind a place they could all visit when they wished to, so the Cove could keep their memories close.

Thank you That means a lot," she told Stella when the young woman offered her support. Though she grieved deeply for her husband it was a comfort to know that she had so many wolves there to help her through. As strong as she might want to he she knew that she couldn't always be that strong and that one day she would have to lean on one or more of them.

The truth of the matter was that Oksana loved the idea of a memorial. A central place that everyone could go to remember those they'd lost. The crow could see herself spending a lot of time there just speaking with Aleister. How much she missed him. She also knew that life had to go on but having a place like that might bring some peace to her and others in the pack.

Oksana offered Stella a soft smile, "I wouldn't miss it," she told the young woman. "This is an important thing for all of us and I think that it will offer eveyone in the pack some comfort." At least she hoped that it would. It could be a reminder that though the ones they loved weren't with them they still lived on.

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Stella returned Oksana's smile, then let out a sigh. There was a lot more she could say, but for the moment it didn't seem necessary. She felt somehow lighter, having spoken with her stepmother, and hoped that she'd been able to help her in some way too.

Hopefully the memorial could help them all heal a bit, in some small way at least. It would take some thought to get it right, to make sure it was worthy of the memory of Pa and the others. And also everyone who still lived, to help connect them. A peaceful place, but accessible enough that they could join together there too. Her gaze swept up to the mountain peaks in thought for a moment, before returning to earth.

"I hope so too. I think I know where to start now," she exhaled, meaning a little more than just the memorial. She had just needed to have a step to take right now in order to start walking again, it seemed.

Stella blinked over at the dark woman, remembering the small distance she'd once childishly placed between them. Oksana had been here through these hardest times Stella had experienced, had taken her as she was and given her the time she needed. She was thankful to have her in her life now. However much she might always miss Kip, she did not have to miss having a mother figure and right now having that place to turn. "Sana... Thank you for helping keep our family together," she couldn't hold back her tears any longer, but they weren't as painful as she thought they'd be to let go of.

It would be a difficult thing to see the memorial come to fruition but happy too. In Oksana's mind it would be a confirmation that Aliester was really gone and he wouldn't be coming back. There had been times the crow had been able to pretend that he was just off on a hunting trip and would be back as soon as he could. She knew she would have to face this and begin the process of moving on.

The one thing that she could be grateful for was that she still had Stella and Leo in her life. Though they weren't her own children she cared for them very deeply. Leaving them hadn't ever been a thought on her mind. She hoped that in time they woukd develop relationships with their younger siblings and they could remained a tighter knit family.

"That a good place to be. The first step isnt always the easiest," she offered, "But now that you know that I think it will all fall into place for you " Stella was a smart girl and Oksana had every faith in her. "I'm sure whatever you decided to do will be perfect because it will come from your heart." She hoped the words she offered woukd be encouraging for the younger woman.

The crow was surprised by what Stella said next. It hadnt been expected but it brought a smile to her lips. "You're welcome. I wouldn't have it any other way. It was never my goal to replace your mother but I always wanted you and your brothers to know that I was here for you." Oksana wanted to be able to support them in any way she could. "I want us to always be together. Just because your father isn't with us any longer doesn't mean we aren't family." Oksana meant every word.

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Stella nodded silently as Oksana spoke. The first step, she thought. The memorial would be a heavy task, but it would be a way forward, a way to honor her father and the others who had come and gone, to give something back to the rest of the pack.

After that, the girl just sat there for some time, simply glad for her stepmother's company and support. She let her thoughts and tears flow freely in a way she had not done since before her mother had disappeared, and felt a little lighter for it. Her sobs were buried in the crow's inky black ruff. Eventually, she felt as if she had no more tears. Her breathing calmed. She felt strange. Numb, but newly free of some of the weight that had encumbered her for so long, Stella took a breath.

"You're right, he'd have wanted us to take care of each other. I won't forget that," she promised. She'd keep Oksana's words of strength, and her father's wishes with her when the going got hard and the days dark, or when the road was easy and the sun shone down on them warmly. Either way, they were family.

Despite her grief Oksana knew that it was important to take it one step at a time. She also knew how hard that first step could be but it had to be made. With her mother it had been leaving the ethos to start her life without Inna. Now she felt that the memorial might be that first step. It would be a reminder of what she lost for a long time. In time she hoped it woukd be a reminder of all the happy moments they'd shared.

As Stella cried Oksana embraced her and just let her release the grief and sadness.
It woukd be good for her stepdaughter to have this opportunity to let her emotions go without judgement. Oksana was glad that she coukd be there for Stella in that moment. Mostly though because she was glad that she coukd offer some comfort to the girl.

"He would have," she agreed, "We were all family to your father." That was something she'd admired about her husband. Just another reason she thought of him as a good man. "I won't forget either," she added because it was something they all needed to remember.

(This post was last modified: Mar 23, 2023, 08:26 PM by Oksana.)

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