Sex: FemaleNamara gazed out over the vast mountain range and the lands beyond, she could almost make out a dark patch where the thicket was if not for the clouds. Before the she wolf lay the lands of Relic Lore, and just below her lay Poison Path, and Lost lake, she could just make out the surface of the water, It looked as if it were a sheet of Ice dropped into the mountain shrouded in mist. Namara inhaled as deeply as she could until she began to feel the familiar twinge in her belly that told her she had gone as far as she could before it would hurt. After a few moments of fighting her emotions, she knew she just had to let it all out. A crying howl split the cold air, enough to strike pain even into the most hardened of wolves. It was Namara's song of pure sadness. The hurt in her rang so clearly that she was almost sure that it would echo into eternity and the cry would be heard on that mountain for generations."speech"
The day had started cloudy, something that Ash did not take as a good sign. Unlike some wolves, Ash did not like rain, but not just rain in general; the male just did not like getting wet. He was perfectly fine with drinking water, considering he needed it to survive, but swimming or running around in the rain was something he definitely never found himself doing unless it was highly needed. Hopefully the sky would not emit the moisture it was holding over the mountains and move to more to the west before releasing rain upon the lore. Knowing his luck, Ash would be the man that got the most of the rain compared to everyone else.
Today Ash had decided to take a single day off, just for him so that he could relax and would not have to bother with any other wolf within the pack for a little bit. He would sit by the lake, looking out across his throne that had been pronounced by Ava, which seemed so long ago. It was his now though, the place that he had looked over so long until she had finally returned, only to leave again, on better terms. His friend was not gone and he had been thrilled to see her face once again. At least she, unlike Treena, had returned. Ash knew about what had happened with Ava, but with his girl, he did not know. He would not ever find out if she were dead, or alive. With an unfortunate sigh, he lowered his head, before it was snapped right back up by an alarming howl sounded by Namara’s mouth.
Snapping his eyes towards the direction that he had heard it, his eyes landed on the smaller female, much higher up than he. Slightly worried that she had been injured, Ash got up from his sitting position and pushed his legs into a run, scaling up the mountains as quick as he could proved to not be too difficult for him, considering how long he had been by the mountains. When he finally got to the top, he stood by Namara, his piercing mossy green eyes observing her, a question ripping from his lips. "What happened?" Eyebrows creased in confusion, he stared down at her. From his point of view, nothing seemed injured to him, save her leg, which he already knew about. Considering how she was up here, he could tell that she was not listened to Nina’s instructions very well. And so quietly, he mumbled, "You do realize, this isn’t considered “taking a break.”"
"I never was a very good listener Ash. To answer your question, nothing is wrong, everything is great save for my dead brother, my half useless leg and the other pack constantly pressing our borders. I just wanted to get away from it today, that's all." Namara spoke in a voice bordering on sarcastic at first, then it flowed out into an even, open, honesty. He should understand what I must feel like, out of everyone he should have some idea. Namara could recall Nina's words about what Ash had done, she knew, or at least thought, that it must torture him the same way her past tortured her. A sigh escape the she wolf's muzzle.
"I'm sorry Ash, I don't mean to sound rude, I just wish that things had ended differently, or better still began differently." Unsure of how much Ash knew about his subordinate's past she continued to speak, though almost to herself, "The whole thing is my fault, if I had never felt the need to torture him when we were young, he wouldn't have come here, and he wouldn't be dead." The large two tone she wolf, began to growl softly, at herself, and her lids once again slid down to cover the silver gaze. You fool Namara, you fool. Her head hung low once more, Why is this so hard to beat, and why does he have to keep seeing me down at my very worst?
The small woman looked tortured for a second as he stared down upon her, and when the answer came, Ash tilted his head slightly, understanding where she was coming from. If anything seemed to be stressful, it would definitely be his subordinate’s life. The poor girl’s brother had just died(even though Ash did not like him) and he was sure that was hard on her. One thing that he knew of was of how Kamota had a tortured past with his brother and sister, and Namara had been trying to prove herself to her brother before her had died an untimely death. Now, there was nothing, or maybe something, that could help Namara get back into her grove. His large body swept over her, taking a seat nearby and listened to her speak, nodding when her final statement ended. "Yes…I know about your past with your brother…" remaining silent after he has spoken, he looks upon the gray mountains, not shocked when a familiar voice whispered in his head. Help her…let her know you are there for her…reassure her.
Clenching his jaw, he looked back towards his pack mate, his jaws opening once again to speak to her, "It is not your fault that Kamota has passed on, Namara. No one could have predicted his Fate. Just because he passed, doesn’t mean that you need to give up, and in that case, overwhelm yourself." With his final words he mentioned towards her leg. Ash was no fool; anyone knew that even if you wanted to get away from the pack they did not have to climb the mountains to do it, especially with an injury like hers. Deciding to add on to what he had said, he sighed, not knowing if he was going to regret this later, "Look…it has been awhile since I have been in the Lore…and I’ve meet plenty of amazing wolves. Ava, who is no longer in our pack, also my best friend. Treena, my mate, also gone from the Lore. I don’t know where she is, and Belladonna, just like my sister, she is gone… I owed all three of these wolves so much and they are gone, but I life, and I do my job. We have a family still, Namara; that should be enough for anyone." His secret was out. The reason he was so angry all the time. It was because the large man masked his hurt with complete anger. No one could hurt him if he was always angry, because then no one could struck the soft chords within him, except maybe, save a few wolves who were close enough to him.
Not many things had been able to break through Namra's exterior before she had met Ash. No she had been just as closed of as he, if not even more so. Yet from the moment her footing was lost on that mountain it had all been gone. Life began beating her down mercilessly and the only question that she could even try to hold in her mind was, why? Namara knew it was partly due to the disregard she had held for anyone whom did not have Laylani blood, it had caused a lot of good wolves a lot of trouble. Yet it could not be enough to warrant the pain she now felt. Straighten up Namara, you need to quit being weak! It was war within the female's heart, as her pain battled with her strong heart and her stubbornness. Until at last a sharp growl escaped her jaws. You know you are stronger than this Namara, you can't let this beat you. Do you think Kamota would have given up?
It's a broken heart babe, I know the sound, feels like your hands are nailed to the ground.
It was the question she had needed to ask herself. Of course Kamota would not have given up, if there was one thing Kamota was, it was determined. So Namara could not let herself quit, not now, not ever. But why does it still hurt? The angry thought swirled in her head before swelling and causing the pain in her stomach to flare. Only this time instead of falling on her side as she would before she stayed upright. "Is that all you've got?" She growled viciously through gritted teeth. The pain worsened and her leg bent, curling up to her body just in case she fell. "Don't give up Namara, don't give up." Still the pain came yet she was not trying to calm down nor trying to stop it. Namara laylani was physically challenging the pain she felt to take her down. In the females mind her survival and spirit all held on to this singular point in her life. If her pain could take her down physically it would destroy her mentally, at least that was what she thought. So Namara growled and rumbled while a few yelps found their way in and she glared at the ground doubled nearly in half yet, still the she wolf stood.
It's a hard earned victory, the light that came from you to me could never be wrong.
He watched over the woman as silence reigned over them, worried that she had not grasped the point that he was trying to hand out to her. He waited for a response, his ears pricked forward and mossy green eyes curious as he silently stood there, watching the small female beneath him. When a small growl escaped her muzzle, the alpha could easily feel the anger seeping into his veins, not happy that when he tried to help her, all he received was a growl in response. How dare she growl at him! He had no clue that she was not growling at him but at her. If he would have known this, perhaps he would have had different feelings on the matter.
When the woman finally did reply to him, the first words he heard boiled his temper even more. She was testing his word!! Letting a snarl erupt from his muzzle, he stepped forward threateningly. He had opened himself up to her, and she was testing his words? Though, if the alpha would have listened better he would have heard the last sentence that would escape the Laylani’s mouth and realized that she was only talking to herself. Unfortunately for Namara, he had not heard this part. Watching her try and stand up, going against his sister’s word angered him even more, not happy that she had disobeyed his orders, along with Nina’s. Flashing his fangs at her, he lunged forward, letting his jaws wrap around the fur along her neck and pressed her into the ground, forcing her to stay down. The words that escaped his lips were cruel and uncalled for, "You will submit to me and you will obey my orders." It was the first time he had physically gone after Namara and enforced her to submit to him. The worst part was, that later he would regret it, but right now, he felt no remorse towards the woman. Adding onto his phrase he said, "Stay down and submit to me, or die."
"What are you doing?" When the words came they were weak and ragged, Namara's paws could only move under her, she couldn't stand up under her own power now, not even if she wanted too. The large grey hued female was exhausted and now, now there was no fight at all left in her. Not for the world, it seemed her struggle was being lost, Namara was sliding fast into the dark abyss of depression and there didn't appear to be a paw extended to offer help anywhere. With Kamota gone and her body still in a state of some kind of destroyed wreck how could she fight it? "Just do it Ash, Just kill me." The sadness rang in a clear voice, Namara's cries began then, as if she were a dying pup. "I've lost everything now, why can't I even be strong anymore?" All the fight had left her, now she was merely begging for a mercy killing. Something the old Namara Laylani would never have asked for, something she had once scolded and thought of as cowardly.
The man could not process what he was doing, he just knew that he had Namara by the throat and that he was completely satisfied with it. Until he heard the soft whisper of her voice…she was scared of him and he had her pinned. Her voice whimpered, almost ordering him to end her, to end her misery. He knew he could not, as it was against pack law….and he just could not do that to her, of all wolves not her. He was doing it right now though, and if it were not for a screaming female love that he was still missing, he probably would have badly hurt Namara. Ash stop it! You are hurting her! For once, he actually replied to the voice in his head, Treena, what the fuck are you talking about? Her reply came instantly, the voice irritated, Pay attention to what you are doing. Don’t be foolish. Use your damn head.
Blinking his eyes, he allowed his mossy orbs to look down upon Namara, his brows creasing as he let all of his weight off of her, letting her words sink into his brain. "No. You have not lost everything, and don’t ever think that your life is as hard as others out there, do you understand me? What happened to your backbone? That’s what I l-" he let a strangled cough escape his mouth in order to cover up his mistake. "That’s what I need from you," he finished his thought, telling the truth, but not exactly saying what he had meant to say. I see how it is…I knew I wasn’t wrong. It’s been so long and now you’re moving on. The words in his mind made him feel like a pup had just nipped his ass. He had not wanted to move on from Treena…who looked so familiar compared to Namara, it hurt. Inhaling, he let out a long sigh, he voice now sounding as defeated as it was the day it was announced that Belladonna had disappeared, "I must apologize, Namara. I don’t know what came over me and that was highly out of line."
Through the fog that seemed to be rolling in around her, or at least she thought it was getting foggy. She took a breath and replied. "No." Namara spoke, strength slowly returning to her voice, but not her body, head still spinning, she took another breath. "No, Ash, don't be sorry, it's it's not your fault. I should be able to cope, It's hard that's all, Kamota isn't coming back and I... I need to... to accept that" All at once she felt a very strange sensation creep up her spine, as if all the energy were draining from her body. "You haven't lost everything either, Ash, I'm still here, remember that." Her last word became a sigh as she fell to her left side, vision darkening her last thought was, It's been hard for him too. Then her body hit the cold ground and she sank into unconsciousness though her breathing remained steady.
She did not look good, as if she were hanging off a cliff(not literally). Ash did not know what it was though, something was just off about the Laylani girl. He did not comment on it though, for he knew that it would be highly rude of him. Her voice once again caused his ears to prick forward, his mossy green eyes fading slightly when he words reached him. He knew fully well that he could confide in her, but he knew that he would not. Sighing and about to suggest that they start on the way back, he watched a the woman in front of her collapsed on the rocky terrain. Worry seeped through him and a small amount of panic. But he pushed it aside, as seeing that she was perfectly fine and breathing normally. Deciding to give her the comfort of rest and warm, Ash lay by her side, much like he had done in the time of her injury and offered up his body heat to her. He did not wish for any of his pack mates to get sick and being warm was one way to prevent such a thing from happening.