Why was she here? Why...had she come all this way? No reason other than self hatred and perhaps the subconscious desire for Jaysyek or Elettra to find her .. and take the choice of life out of her paws. That time ago, with Kiche near his.. 'home' had shown her how very easy it would be to simply lay down in the snow and let the elements cover her. But it also told her just how hard that would be - as she couldn't guarantee that she wouldn't be disturbed. Perhaps it had been the desire to see Raigo - to catch some..scent.. some trailing hint that he'd been here, that he was safe, alive and well... Whatever the subconscious or conscious decision was.. Vlarindara had traveled from her den in Riddle Heights towards the distant Cedarwood forest. She had been careful to skirt the lands that marked Grizzly Hollows territory - with enough room that her scent wasn't going to waft to the borders...except in one place - where she'd stopped about five feet from the marker.. and stared through the trees, where she knew the heart of the pack territory lay.
As much as she wanted to - she couldn't go there.. couldn't go back... Nor would she. Vlarindara sighed, drawing herself away from the borders .. then continued on towards Jasper Rocks. It had been a place of safety, of relaxation in the past... And as her thinned legs carried her through the snow to the familiar place, she came to a stop, watching the frozen waters.. letting her eyes slide over the nostalgic rocks and familiar formations. Her heart felt heavy... as if it was being ripped from her chest, and she let her head fall, ears folding against her tangled nape. She missed this place.. the memories with it.. the conversation she had had with Jaysyek.. on these rocks.
Slowly, her paws carried her to the frozen rocks where she lowered her head, scenting along them - as if the months would have kept the scents upon their hard surface. The once proud, plumed tail had fallen between her hind legs, dragging along the snow as the female moved to the waters edge and stamped her forepaws in it to break the ice - allowing her a drink. A cold wind raced through her fur, leaving her shivering, causing the white female to lift her head and look towards the skies above, finding her heart flying with the few birds she *did* see. Eyes drifted once again towards the water, a somewhat.. sad smile on her lips. What would it be like to fly?