Grizzly Hollow identity crisis

Oh.  Oh.
 
Sometimes it was hard to remember that Tomen was only a few months away from full adulthood, and that meant any number of things.  He might become a member with a role, or he might disperse from his natal grounds.  He might wish to start a family of his own (and indeed, if that was something he wanted, Veho already knew he was amenable to discussions about logistics).
 
And, with that in mind, it meant that he clearly hard his eye on a girl.  Though the pale-eyed wolf had a keen idea on who he thought the Lyall was mentioning, he decided to keep that part to himself, and instead nudged the bottom of the boy’s chin.
 
“You think, or you know?  Different wolves love in different ways – that she does not express it in the exact same does not mean that she doesn’t know.  Perhaps it is time for a conversation with her.  And, Tomen, even if she does not feel that way now does not mean it will not happen.  Oula and I are very close friends – but I have found my feelings for her changing in recent times, despite that we have known each other for longer than that.  You can love her without being loved back.  And it might hurt.  But it is important to keep loving as long as your heart tells you – and it is important to know that love is not a prison.  You should keep living your life the way you see fit, regardless of how she feels for you in return.”
 
He paused.
 

“And I am always here, of course – whether you wish to bring me happy news, or you wish to commiserate.” 

(This post was last modified: Jan 09, 2017, 06:35 PM by Veho.)

It made him feel so self-centred. After what had happened to Pip, to Duckweed's mother, how could he sit here and cry about unrequited feelings? It wasn't like she was cruel to him. She called him her best friend. That was love, right? Why wasn't that enough?

@Veho had to know who she was, but in that moment, Tomen didn't care. If the man disapproved, he held his tongue, and chose to offer only kindness. For all of Veho's capacity for love, and love for multiple wolves at the same time... packs still had laws, and Tomen didn't want to break any, but that was just another weight on his conscious. Nevermind that he didn't really know what Nineva loving him back would achieve. They could be mates? Was that his end-goal? While the mere notion lifted his heart, it wasn't so simple. Nineva wanted to revive Whisper Caverns, she was destined for leadership, for greatness. If Tomen didn't want the Hollow, could he want the Caverns? What if he let her down? What if she found someone more suitable to lead alongside her? He'd promised to come, had made it clear that he was hers, forever, but he knew that came with conditions. He wasn't Veho, or Oula, or Rook. He was his mother. He knew that he couldn't belong to her but not have her belong to him - to see her lead with someone else, be partners with someone else, have children with someone else, love someone else.

Ancestors, he was so selfish.

Did he think, or did he know? The memory of the mistletoe drifted to the forefront of his mind, how she had looked at it so critically, had questioned its meaning. She loved him, as a friend. Where he had briefly worried that she might have feelings for Deacon, he now trusted that not to be the case. A small part of him wondered if she really thought about it at all, or if the word 'romance' was as foreign to her as her tone of voice had implied. Maybe she suppressed it as much as he did, but he thought not. She wasn't the sort of wolf to hide from what she wanted.

How desperately Tomen wished he was that bold.

"I know." He'd known for a long time that Veho was there for him, no matter what. This is what family meant. He felt small and vulnerable and humbled by Veho's endless empathy, and it broke down the last of his hesitation.

As ever, there was so much he could have said, so much he wanted to, but he knew that he didn't have the words. Ultimately, he could sum it all up in one gesture.

"Thank you. I - thank you. Could I... is it okay if I called you dad?"

I think you can fade out with your post (or even mine, if you felt so inclined!) unless Tomen has more to say.  <3

There were so many types of love, and Veho couldn’t even begin to explain them all.  What the pair of yearlings had already was a form of love, though perhaps it was not packaged in the size and shape Tomen currently desired.  But whatever passed between them, he trusted the boy to make a wise decision, and to use both his head and his heart if and when he decided to speak with Nineva about it.  Until that time came to pass, Veho was more than happy to continue to be the lad’s sounding board.  However limited his choices were, the man was still honored, and humbled, to be allowed such intimate knowledge.
 
Even with that in mind, Tomen’s question still startled him.
 
Ears pricked forward as moonlit eyes opened wide, whiskers bristling as he stared at the youth, wondering for a moment if he’d misheard him.  If he’d only heard the words he wanted, and not what the lad actually said, but a heartbeat passed, and he bobbed his head as he swallowed thickly, words trapped in his throat once more.
 
“Of course,” he rasped, overwhelmed by the sheer rush of emotion swirling around his chest.  “Of course.  I would be so honored, Tomen.”

The yearling smiled, glad for both of them; that @Veho would be so touched by the sentiment, and that Tomen himself finally let himself have a father figure he truly relied on.

Shuffling just a few inches to the side to bring them sitting closer together, Tomen tucked the bridge of his snout under Veho's jaw and sighed, content, feeling comforted and lifted and safe.

There would be time to ponder all the many wise things his dad had said, but for now he just wanted to appreciate the moment.