White Fir Notch No map for these roads

The small medic paced back and forth outside of the den entrance, the soft bubble of the nearby spring did little to calm her nerves, so much change coming so quickly. It’s gotten to the point that she felt like she was walking on thorns, physically from the drain of her pregnancy and the mental exhaustion her false story had wrought upon her. She;s learned how much someone can change and do things they wouldn't usually, when someone else’s life was on the life, the life growing inside of her.

What would she do? WOuld the truth ever come out? Would Zilas learn that he was a father? How many would be in her litter, what would she do when they asked about their father? Sylva’s mind drifted off toward the thoughts of her own father Henry, kind and gentle, the opposite of her cold and distant mother, why did he have to die? WHy couldn’t she? Mother daughter nor mother bore any love for each other. The Notch female was long over that delusion that there’d be any hope, but in all her efforts to avoid being like her, had she gone down the same road?

Maybe Emrys would have answers, though both followed the same path, he had a lot more experience than she did, maybe he could help ease her anxiety over the delivery, one thought lingered at the back of Sylva mind..what if she didn’t survive, the thought of leaving her unborn children alone in this harsh world was too much, after the sacrifices she had forced no herself in order to her try and ease the guilt, it still lingered there, just and the edges of her mind like mist.

She trekked the small distance to the spring’s edge, her muzzle plunging into the warm depths when she sucked in her breath, coughing and sputtering, there in the water’s edge, it wasn’t her reflection she saw, but that of her mother’s. Shortly after, she raised her muzzle to the sky, sending upa shirl call for Emrys, she couldn’t, no longer.

ThoughtDialogue

With Jynx’s due date getting closer and closer Emrys had started making the preparations for her. He didn't want to be caught in the middle of a crisis with nothing to help her. The last thing he wanted was for something to go wrong and the pups were lost or he lost his mate. He couldn't stand the thought of not having her by his side everyday. Now that they led the notch their paws would be full with caring for and raising their pups as well as running the pack smoothly. He was certain they could do it, he and Jynx both being as dedicated to the pack as they were.

There was another concern on his mind as he picked along the edge of the spring in search of the plant that would be most important. Sylva, what had happened to her and the pack law that had been broken weighed heavily on the healer. He hadn't seen much of the girl since she'd returned to the notch. It worried him but he wasn't sure how to approach her with his concerns so he'd tried to keep an eye on her from a distance until he figured it out.

It seemed she had other plans as her call reached his ears, he would have to speak with her about it now. First things had to be first, what had caused her call to sound as it did? He abandon his hunt for the sweetgrass until a later time and made his way in her direction. He wasn't sure what to expect but as the new leader of the notch he had to be there for his subordinate in whatever way he could be.

He found her at the edge of the spring with her muzzle wet, the healer approached with head and tail raised. “Hello Sylva, what is it I can do for you today?” He asked flashing her a quick smile before sitting back on his haunches to wait for her to reveal her reason for calling him.

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Sylva flinched when Emrys appeared, the soft smile only caused her guilty conscious to twist even further as she took a deep breath, a whine escaped. She couldn’t live like this anymore. “To listen…” she said quietly, settling down on gently onto her side. Her mouth opened and closed slowly as she swallowed, unsure how to begin, she wanted to to just throw it all out there like she had before and beg for mercy. “I’ve...done something bad...I’ve betrayed everyone Ermys, you...Jynx...the pack… and worst of all myself..I tried to justify it over and over to myself as being for their sake...but I can’t.”

“I was foolish, I knew the rules and I broke them anyways.” she said, another whine escaping, all she wanted to do at this point was to hide from these feelings, the anxiety of the unknown, her fate, the fate of the pups. “The father...it’s Zilas...an old member of our pack back when we were in the Crest...I don’t know why i did it...when he returned...so alone..I..I couldn’t leave him...as we talked...I think I came to love him..and then the heat hit and one day...we just crossed paths again..there’s so many things I’ve felt that I wish I could explain or have known about before but..I can’t.” She took a deep breath, her hazel gaze falling onto Emry’s form “I betrayed everyone’s trusts Emrys, I...I don’t want mercy for myself, but I don’t want the life growing inside of me to live a lie..I can’t be like my mother.”

ThoughtDialogue

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Emrys had not realized how far along the young healer was in her pregnancy until he saw her. The whine that reached his ears was unexpected to say the least, the Sylva in front of him now wasn't the same girl he'd spoken to before she'd left. His question was met with on word and one that seemed to be very heavy in whatever it was she wanted him to listen to. “I can listen for as long as you need me to,” he assured her. It was of course his job to listen to her and help her as his subordinate. So gave her a small indication to continue with what she wanted to say. His brows furrowed as she spoke of betrayal and justification, this was not a good start for her. He wondered what was so bad that it would cause her to feel the way she did.

The healer wasn't in to jump to conclusions, he wanted all the facts before he formed a picture of what had happened. He didn't speak and instead waited for her to continue and continue she did. Sylva went on to tell him the father of her child and how it had happened between them. The longer she spoke the deeper her grave as the anger welled up inside him, she had gone against pack law, even more so put his own pups in danger. To add to what she had done she'd gotten herself into this mess with a wolf outside if the pack. A low growl vibrated his throat as his anger reached the highest level it had ever been but he stopped it almost as quickly as he'd started it. Only three things stopped him from chasing her off that moment, the pups she carried inside of her, he would not put their lives in danger if he could help it. Jynx, he couldn't make this decision without her as it affected one of their members and the pack. Lastly Sylva had come clean Instead of keeping quiet and letting them believe the lie.

“What is it exactly you expect me to do Sylva? What you have told me, that you knew full well what you were doing and yet you did it anyway. Tell me did you not expect the consequences to befall you? Did you believe yourself higher than them?” Emrys rose from his position and stepped forward his muzzle only inches from hers tail raised over his spine as he asserted his dominance over the subordinate, “Your biggest mistake,” he growled, “Is lying about it. You are second to Jynx do you really think I want a liar to be the one closest to my mate? What else will you lie about because it suits you? And now you have put your children in danger. Are you prepared to raise them as a lone wolf Sylva. I know all too well the kind of life that is for a pup.”

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She didn’t know what to say in response, her mouth sealed shut by the shame of it all, her tail tucked between her legs as Emry’s rose, she didn’t know how to answer his questions, yes she knew the laws, didn't she think she was above them? No, did she know what he should do..well that was a painful one to even think about, exile was the only thing that came to the healer’s mind but as he worded it, could she raise a litter as a loner? The thought made her swallow in fear, she wanted to say that she wouldn't lie again, but what was the point, the trust she had built up over the years, gone in an instant, at her own doing.

She shook her head slowly, her hazel gaze angled toward the ground “I don’t know Emrys..I...they can’t be raised as loners though...we wouldn’t survive...that I do know.” She paused, shaking slightly “I don’t know..I didn’t want to be like my own mother and endangering or abandoning them.” Her heart started beating quickly, fear welling up at the thought of raising her unborn children alone, she knew deep down, that either she, them or all of them wouldn't survive with her as the sole provider, and she couldn’t bring this burden onto Zilas.

Shallow water has trapped several fish in a small pond. Hunt Opportunity

@Jynx 

Why it was she had chosen him to tell when it should have been Jynx as it was his mate who she'd lied to he didn't know. The anger the seethed in him was like none he'd ever felt before for she had crossed a line he thought the she wolf was incapable of crossing. Now he had the unpleasant job of giving her a punishment that would fit her crime. Unfortunately for her he had to follow through with it being a new leader he could not show weakness in front of the pack. They had to understand that any breaking of the rules would result in a punishment that fit their crime. It was however lucky for her that she was with child and days away from giving birth or she would have already been chased out of the pack.

He wasn't expecting any​ answers to the questions that he'd asked, that wasn't the purpose. They were meant for her to realize the gravity of her mistake, for her to realize that she couldn't go back from here and her place within the pack was a fragile one. He did not back down as she stuttered through her response which she seemed to realize that her children would most certainly die if she were ousted that day or even if he chose to wait until they were born. “You should have thought about that before you broke pack law.” She brought up her mother once more and despite that anger he felt toward her he gave her a piece of advice that clearly hadn't occurred to her. “If you don't want to be like her then think about your children and what's best for them.” As far as she was concerned the well being of her pups was all that he cared about, he knew he wouldn't be able to live with himself if their lives were cut short because of something he'd done.

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It can be assumed that Jynx has been lurking nearby in silence, listening.

The prospect of motherhood was a wonderful thing, but as Jynx was finding out, being pregnant got old, fast. With her belly and sides swollen like a small balloon, she was ready to burst. The time couldn't come soon enough either. The pups inside of her had grown active and restless, putting weight on her organs. The jostling kicks and squirms of their bodies grew more frequent while they took up more space. This increase in their activity was proof enough, that soon, they would be ready for their debut into the world. The Notch matriarch, now fully confident in her permanent role, may not have moved as gracefully or swiftly as she normally would, thanks to the extra weight she was carrying. But that made her no less alert, no less mobile. She kept busy between gorging herself daily or collecting bedding for the den, which she needed to tidy up soon. A cluster of soft fir twigs, fallen from their respective trees, was clutched between her mouth, on her way back to the den, when she heard the voices.

Sylva. And Emrys. Talking. She changed direction and padded silently towards their location, hanging back far enough to watch and listen, but to not be immediately seen. A swirl of emotions stirred in her chest upon seeing the younger female. She too was going to have her own pups any day now. Jynx did not approve of her situation, even if it had been by force, as the healer had so explained, to her and Gent some time ago. But Gent was gone now. And it was here, that as Sylva's words flowed, that the truth finally came out. A lie. It had all been a lie! Concealed behind the interweaving, sparse branches of the trees, Jynx's golden eyes flashed dangerously, narrowing. As the web of lies continued to unravel, another nail in Sylva's coffin hammered itself into place. The father was Zilas. A wolf who Gent himself, had deemed as untrustworthy and therefore, no longer welcomed amongst the Notch.

Her mate she noticed, was angry. And rightfully so. She had seen Emrys irked before, but never like this. He had worked with Sylva before, sharing his common knowledge of herbs and medicine. He had trusted her. They all did. That is, until the day Sylva came home reeking of the hormones of a male. The russet woman had her suspicions then, and if it had not been for Gent, she would've chased her out on the spot. But her well respected friend had stepped in, giving Sylva the benefit of the doubt. But he too, was made a fool of. She should have stuck to her gut instinct from the start. Oh how the former Alpha would've been pissed. And disappointed in who he thought to be one of his most loyal wolves. Having heard enough, her anger at a boiling point, Jynx revealed herself, stepping out onto the scene with tense, purposeful strides. Dark lips peeled back in a flash of teeth as a low growl rippled from her throat towards Sylva.

Drawn up to her full height, dark tipped hackles bristling, complete with a stiffly upright tail, she pinned the subordinate under her harsh glare. "What you have done here today Sylva, is completely unforgivable." She huffed, breathing a puff of hot air against her face. "You were given one chance by Gent, and yet you still lied to us! To the pack. If it hadn't been for him that day, you would have been gone already. I am not an idiot, Sylva." Jynx would not be made a fool of, nor would she allow Sylva to escape unpunished. "You put your pups at risk, but ours as well. The only reason that we are allowing you to stay is because of the lives you carry. Those pups do not need to suffer because of a mistake their young and foolish mother made." Confident in that Emrys saw where this was going, she gave her mate a stiff nod. Swinging back to face Sylva, she lunged and snapped her jaws firmly around the other wolfs muzzle, eliciting a deep growl. Daring her to fight back, to test her dominance. Once satisfied, she released her hold, leaving Sylva's snout unmarked. "You are hereby demoted to the rank of lowest until further notice." It was a hard pill to swallow, but at least it was better than being forced into exile as a first time mother. Sylva would have to live with the consequences, as an example towards the rest of the pack, that deception among their ranks would not be tolerated. Not while Jynx and Emrys Myrddin ruled.

@Emrys

She’s messed up before, though never this badly, her ears fell further with each word Emrys spoke, in all of her attempts to try and keep her unborn children safe, she had endangered them, weaving a web of lies that she herself had chosen to unravel, unable to have them grow into more lies. His words stung deeply, because they were true, she hadn't thought about what was best for her litter, no matter how delusional she tried to be, she couldn't force herself to believe the lies that the others had so come to take as the truth from her.

Her mouth opened, to speak, quickly shutting when she heard a growl emit from the shadows, her heart beat quickened when the female lead appeared, her stance told the scared medic everything she needed to know, Jynx had heard every bit of her confession, she was going to have to face her at some point about it, why not just dig herself in further into her grave, there wasn’t going to be any crawling back from it now. Her tail tucked further between her legs, her ears fell flat in submission, as Jynx reiterated the crimes, she couldn't bring herself to look into her leader’s yellow glare, once there had been trust there, now she was sure only disgust, and rightly so.

She said nothing as Jynx spoke, she knew it wouldn't do her any good, it could even provoke an attack, unsure if she’d react with violence, she didn’t want the pups growing inside her at risk, though the sudden lunge caused an startled whine and yelp to escape, her heart sank with the news, as befitting as it was though, the Lowest, she had fallen from a respected position to one below even the yearlings, but...it wasn't exile and death, as much as she hated it, it was still better, though the real punishment for the ebony healer was the loss of trust, how could she face her packmates when they found out? No words left her muzzle in defense or protest, the shame and shock kept her from speaking.

The healer was still in disbelief at what Sylva had done even after he had asserted his dominance over her and let her know what she had done to not only herself but the pups growing inside her. The part that bothered him most was it had been completely unexpected as he thought Sylva to be too pure to tell a lie such as she had. To find out she wasn't as he thought was in a way disturbing for Emrys. Even worse she used love as her excuse for breaking the law in the first place and her pups as the reason she had told the lie. It was sad she couldn't take the blame for her actions but instead put it on those who couldn't defend themselves. Her pups didn't deserve that and what could she really teach them? To be like her? To lie to keep themselves out of trouble? The thought of what she would do to her pups and her using love as an excuse only angered him further.

He loved his mate and would do anything for her and he had not let his hormones or emotions cause him to break pack law. It showed exactly where her loyalty lay and it wasn't with White Fir Notch. It was with a man their former leader and his mate did not trust and he could not have that poison spread throughout the pack.

His ears flicked back as the sound of his mates growl reached them, she had heard it all. He was thankful for that even if she should have been resting. They could deal with this here and now without delay which was what he wanted, he didn't want to waste time on a wolf who did not value her pack.

Emrys stepped away from Sylva ad Jynx approached and gave her a nod, it was her turn to have her say. She deserved the chance after all for Sylva had hurt his mate even deeper than she had him. Lying to her, putting the pups she would be bringing into the world soon, and betraying the pack Jynx had worked so hard for. As his mate spoke of the she wolf’s crimes Sylva did not say a word and it was best she didn't it his anger might have found a whole new level.

The nod his mate gave him was a clear indication of what she planned so when she moved forward to grasp Sylva's muzzle he wasn't surprised. Jynx like him needed to assert her own dominance over the she wolf. When Jynx released Sylva her punishment was given, she would be demoted to lowest. He felt Sylva should be gone but this was the best way to make sure the pups had a chance.

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