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when am i gonna lose you? — Shroud of the Lost 
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Played by Van who has 167 posts.
Lone Wolf No Rank
Noriaki Eastfall-Koizumi
Nori had not cried when Nash and Aquene had died. She hadn't cried when they buried them. She hadn't cried when Archer had died, either. There was a lingering numbness that settled in her core, and it didn't erase the emotion that brewed within, but it did make it less... overwhelming. Nori didn't deserve to feel the ache in her chest that had begun when Nash's final howl met her ears - she hadn't been there long enough, hadn't known him for long enough to grieve, she told herself.

And yet.

Some time had passed, and though she certainly hadn't gone far, she hadn't intruded too much on the newly-orphaned little family, instead focusing on gathering food and ensuring there were no threats nearby. She didn't know what the plan was now, or if there was one, but she supposed there was only one way to figure that out.

The sun was dipping beyond the horizon when she decided to follow a familiar scent. Putting this conversation off would do no one any good, but fear beat like a drum behind her ribs, and she didn't want to know what would come of this conversation.

Her throat felt tight as she caught sight of dark agouti fur through the underbrush, and she approached him, head and tail low. "Leo?" she began, and cursed inwardly as her voice gave a traitorous wobble, anxious and emotional both. She meant to say more, really, and normally wouldn't have an issue doing so, but for now, the words wouldn't come.

What are we going to do? and How are you feeling? and How can I help? were on the tip of her tongue, but she couldn't bring herself to voice any of them aloud. Instead, she blurted, clumsy and maybe a little bit desperate and selfish and pleading:

"Please don't leave."

It wasn't what she wanted to say, or maybe it was what she wanted to say the most, and under normal circumstances such an outburst would be embarrassing for her, but she couldn't find it in herself to care. She couldn't do this on her own anymore - couldn't stand the thought of being left behind by someone else, or leaving someone else, and the thought of it being Leo who left hurt in a way she didn't understand. She knew he wouldn't leave Matos and Jessamy, but Nori wasn't part of that inner circle - wasn't tied together by the same kind of strong, unbreakable bonds that each of them were.

Nori didn't deserve to grieve like they did, and yet here she was, and she had been almost from the moment she returned to the Lore in one way or another, and the idea of someone else going somewhere she couldn't was simply too much to handle.

And maybe she should've said something else, or amended what had just come out of her mouth, but she just couldn't. Couldn't find the energy to correct or change it or take it back, so she just left it there, in the open, waiting for the consequences of her actions.
(This post was last modified: Nov 19, 2024, 01:26 AM by Nori.)
Played by PuppyThief who has 188 posts.
Lone Wolf No Rank
Leo Vuesain

You give me something that I can believe in
 

Leo Vuesain was lost. He had just begun to find meaning in his life again, to build hope for a brighter future, and then this latest blow shattered it all. Nash had been a constant in the young man’s life where everything else wavered, a cliff as sturdy as the mountain itself. When his father died, Nash had stepped in to fill that role, raising Leo into the man he now was; And now he’s gone…

 

And Aquene, ever compassionate even when everyone else called for force, a voice of reason to all their hot heads; What do we do without her? She’d held them all together, been their mother, in spirit if not in flesh, loved and cared for them; Who’s going to now…?

 

Leo had been stuck in near paralysis ever since the burial, wandering what should have been their home, going through the motions without paying any real attention. He tried to beat himself back into shape, remind himself that he was all they had left now, the older brother, the one who should be taking the lead. But he just couldn’t do it, couldn’t find the energy, or the confidence. He just felt numb.

 

It was in that state she found him, walking what should have been a border, but was now just a wake. He reacted automatically to the sight of motion, though his movements were sluggish, almost dazed, head lifting just enough for him to see her, eyes blinking slowly as he tried to focus. The sound of her voice broke through to him a bit more, that low tremble making his heart ache.

 

Still, he couldn’t muster up an answer, just blinking dumbly back at her. His brain moved as if through molasses, each thought struggling to bubble to the top. It wasn’t until she spoke again, that the spell was finally broken. “Leave…?” he sputtered, shaking his head to clear the fog, but it didn’t make him any less confused; I’m not leaving…. Did she think that? She sounded so pained too, scared even.

 

Contrary to any logic, Leo suddenly found himself smiling, a humorless grimace that quivered at the edges. A sound somewhere between a giggle and a hiccup escaped him, followed by several burbling noises as he tried to regain control of his voice. Finally, he gave up on words, staggering forwards instead, to wrap his neck around hers, muzzle tilted up to rest across her shoulders.

 

He hugged her tight, breathing deeply to fill his nose with her scent, further clearing his mind. Only after many such breaths did he feel steady enough to pull back, meeting her eyes. “I promise,” he whispered, slightly breathless, but holding her gaze firmly; “Do you?”

”Speech" Thoughts

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